| Whats the deal, texting verses talking?
Posted: 6/5/2009 6:28:06 PM | I've been seeing, no, texting this guy for a couple of months now and every time I talk on the phone with him the conversation is pretty constrained and it seems like he can speak his mind thru text messages but not over the phone. Is this just a nervous guy thing or is it the anynomity issue, not having to put himself out there? or could it be something totally different? I am a super slow texter & it always seems like he misinterprets what i send anyway. I am really into this guy, we definitely have some chemistry going on between us, Since joining this dating site some 5 or 6 months ago this is the first chemistry match when meeting in person, but I am so totally frustrated about this whole communication ordeal, to the point that I am ready to throw in the towel. Please help , any advice will be much appreiated.
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| Whats the deal, texting verses talking?
Posted: 6/5/2009 6:51:40 PM | | Throw in the towel. The golden rule here as in gold (Au) - if it hasn't happened by now it is not going to happen. You are way past that asking date. It hasn't happened and its not going to happen. Chemistry says when there's no reaction nothing happened. Nothing happened. Nothing is going to happen. The experiment is dead. Try another - as in move on | |
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| Whats the deal, texting verses talking?
Posted: 6/5/2009 6:56:05 PM | I can see this leading to a very wonderful relationship with you two texting each other from the other side of the breakfast table and the opposite sides of the bed. Kind of like, what?
Sorry to poke fun at your predicament, but if you read your question objectively, it's pretty odd? It's like, you feel chemistry after a couple of months with a guy who misinterprets what you say, but is amusing when he text messages. I think part of the deal with text messaging (I've sent, what, two in my life) is that it's more about what isn't said than what is said. So, I think you're probably imagining what a great guy he is, when you only get these 0.005 gigabyte snapshots of the guy. | |
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| Whats the deal, texting verses talking?
Posted: 6/5/2009 7:06:09 PM | I used to be a super slow texter due to my lame phone. Now I have a super fast texting phone. I still don't like texting, and thank all things great in the world that nobody close to me texts a lot. Texting is such a distraction, especially when your day involves anything analytical.
Regardless, you don't have to throw in the towel simply because this guy has poor phone skills. You may need to tone down on the texting though, which may upset him. Either that, or get a better phone. It sounds like you get along fine in person.
Screw technology. | |
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| Whats the deal, texting verses talking?
Posted: 6/5/2009 7:13:02 PM | | Speak to him about it. Why do people overlook the most simple of solutions. Explain that its not easy for you to text and you like talking to him much better. A good relationship should have good communication right? Good practise right here. | |
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| Whats the deal, texting verses talking?
Posted: 6/5/2009 7:52:15 PM | hmm.
Cant have it both ways.... often.
You get people that type fast and make mistakes but dont care becasue it is more accpetible to make mistakes amoungst the young and we have used the ne long enough to get over the traditional programming to spell check everyything.
we are better at not misinterpreting text....
You get people that seem extra interesaing on text becaue they can take their time to sound interesting
you get people that can appear confident on text when they are nothig ng but, hide insecurities etc
He is just insecure OR he is upto something else - ntot ready, playing with you.
Tell him to put up or shut up..
dont text him if he knows a call is wat you now want
etc | |
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| Whats the deal, texting verses talking?
Posted: 6/5/2009 8:12:30 PM | If it's such a deal breaker for you, then why not move on?
I find myself to be more confident in person, than talking over the phone. Even though I don't really enjoy sending text messages. | |
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grepv
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Joined: 5/28/2009
Msg: 10 | |
| Whats the deal, texting verses talking?
Posted: 6/5/2009 8:17:13 PM | It's because text messages can be thought out... and he doesn't look stupid as he makes up whatever he's making up.
I'd run.. and run fast. He's probably hiding something. | |
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| Whats the deal, texting verses talking?
Posted: 6/5/2009 8:27:59 PM | imo he likes you . some girls i cant talk to on the phone its just really ackward nothing to say.
he likes you so hes holding his tounge.
i would cut out the phone crap and meet in person have a few drinks and loosin up maybe mini golf or somthing fun and relaxed.
imo phone convos are worthless.txting and meeting up.
phone calls are way to in your face for first meeting someone. | |
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| Whats the deal, texting verses talking?
Posted: 6/5/2009 8:47:00 PM | Dunno, as for myself I bought a phone plan for "talking", if I want a text conversation they can reach me by email.
OP, Maybe you should have told him, or make plans to tell future dates that you "don't" do
texts, that you use email for typed chat. That may help. I have no other clue except that maybe
you should communicate with him about this and not strangers. | |
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JoeiR
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Joined: 5/9/2009
Msg: 13 | |
| Whats the deal, texting verses talking?
Posted: 6/5/2009 11:32:44 PM | I have met SEVERAL men who only text. Its seems like their testicles are too small to pick up the phone and call. In fact, its spreading like warts at the rate so many online guys can only text but call.
Text messaging has given hierarchy to men who have small testicles. They are too shy to speak up in person on the phone or in person, yet they can text whenever because its cold, calloused and requires little motor skills.
If he continues after you've said you dislike it and rather speak on the phone, tell him you are no longer interested and move on. This text B.S. has got to be one of the worst things to come about. Even back in 2005 and 2006 men would call. Since 2008...it has fallen to an all time low | |
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| Whats the deal, texting verses talking?
Posted: 6/5/2009 11:44:38 PM |
Is this just a nervous guy thing or is it the anynomity issue, not having to put himself out there?
With texting you can take your time to figure out what to say, how to say it, and edit it. You can't do that on the phone.
or could it be something totally different?
Could be a million things. I don't know him. Maybe he simply has more experience texting and emailing than talking face to face or on the phone, and he doesn't want to seem simple.
I am a super slow texter & it always seems like he misinterprets what i send anyway.
Then tell him to stop texting. Ask him out. Force him to communicate with you in a face to face setting. What happens when you get in a serious relationship? When you get in an argument is he going to go into the garage and send you text messages on how he feels?
but I am so totally frustrated about this whole communication ordeal
Take responsibility for your own communication. If texting bothers you, don't do it. Tell him why. | |
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JoeiR
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Joined: 5/9/2009
Msg: 15 | |
| Whats the deal, texting verses talking?
Posted: 6/6/2009 12:58:50 AM |
What happens when you get in a serious relationship? When you get in an argument is he going to go into the garage and send you text messages on how he feels?
Classic! makes you wonder doesnt it? | |
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| Whats the deal, texting verses talking?
Posted: 6/6/2009 1:45:59 AM | | Eh, he's just shy and nervous! And because you're a girl he probably thinks you can text at light speed. Stop texting and start hanging out all of the time. I know I don't like talking on the phone at all, but can text or talk face to face just fine. Give him a chance. | |
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Twooit
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Joined: 5/27/2009
Msg: 17 | |
| Whats the deal, texting verses talking?
Posted: 6/6/2009 5:15:43 AM | I think texting has too quickly replaced phone conversations in our society. I don't mind texting one bit- but when the person texts me 100 times a day it gets a bit annoying.
My biggest pet peeve with texting? If I call someone and they text me asking if I called or asking 'what's up?'. It's like... I CALLED YOU and you text me back? If I wanted to text you I would have texted you but I didn't, I called so please just call me back | |
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| Whats the deal, texting verses talking?
Posted: 6/6/2009 6:46:27 AM | Tell him you don't want to text.
I had a guy was texting me all the time and I finally told him I don't really like it, if he wants to talk to call me.
He calls me now. No more texting. It really can be that simple. | |
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| Whats the deal, texting verses talking?
Posted: 6/6/2009 1:19:41 PM | Thx for all the advice guys, Guy is officially dumped, taken out of my phonebook & seriously thinking about disabling my text messaging. The funny jokes are great though.
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