| So my Ex owes me money....
Posted: 6/6/2009 7:28:58 PM | | My girlfriend of a year broke up a couple months ago.. But we were still friends afterward and even still had sex from time to time(friends with benefits if you will) Well anyway, a few weeks ago she says she wants a new phone but needs $300 to get it.. So I agreed to loan her the money which we BOTH agreed she will pay me back $25 a week(is that really hard to pay??) So she misses the first payment immediately and I let her slide and not even mention it.. Keep in mind we are still cool with each other. I even give her rides to work from time to time... I drop her off at work on a Wednesday, then she stops returning my text for a few days.. Then she finally returns my text concerning the money she owes me on Tuesday and says she will pay me it ALL when she gets her check(today) then says "BTW I have a new boyfriend" (which I found out is the guy she was dating before me, her first love) Anyway I tell her "good for you, can you ask him to pay me the money you owe?" then she gets ticks off and have the nerve to curse me out lol.. But even after that she agreed she will pay me several other times..(i have the text saved) But Wednesday is the last time she text me period.. Ive text her plenty of times about the money during thur, fri, and now today.. She hasn't text me at all.. Now I know where she works, when she works and where and lives.. I don't know if someone told her not to pay me or what.. But would I be wrong to confront her at her home or job in a calm manner because she isnt returning my calls? And its a recession, I need to get my freakin car fixed, which coincidentally cost $300... Well? Can someone help me out?? And yes, this is all about the money, I could care less about her douche bag boyfriend.. | |
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| So my Ex owes me money....
Posted: 6/6/2009 7:33:10 PM | | In my expert opinion.. write it off and put it in the 'lesson learned' category. Your car will have to get fixed some other way. Something about how you process the events and what they mean is flawed. Pay the karmic debt for the lesson and write off the loan. | |
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| So my Ex owes me money....
Posted: 6/6/2009 7:35:00 PM | | You can't go to her job, you'd probably get in trouble for that. Take her to small claims court, you have a text that proves she admits she's supposed to be paying you back. | |
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| So my Ex owes me money....
Posted: 6/6/2009 7:51:14 PM |
You can't go to her job, you'd probably get in trouble for that. Take her to small claims court, you have a text that proves she admits she's supposed to be paying you back.
Pretty much.
Let her know that you are serious about getting paid back and that if you have to go to court over the issue, then you will. | |
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| So my Ex owes me money....
Posted: 6/6/2009 7:57:01 PM | OP, why does a phone have to cost $300? Surely, if she didn't have the money, she could have bought a used phone for $50. I'm amazed at people who don't have money yet spend ridiculous amounts on things like this. Did you ask her why she needed to spend that much on a phone?
Ok, off my soapbox and back to the question at hand. I doubt you ever see this money. You may try going by her house to confront her about the money, but that doesn't mean you will get it. She may have her new boyfriend come out to argue with you about it.
You may have to take her to small claims court. Otherwise, maybe hassle her about it. Like I said, I don't think she's going to give it back. She has what she wants. | |
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| So my Ex owes me money....
Posted: 6/6/2009 8:02:26 PM | | OP: Never, ever, ever loan a girlfriend money if you ever intend on getting it back...and definitely not to an ex. | |
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| So my Ex owes me money....
Posted: 6/6/2009 8:04:22 PM | If you can't afford to lose it, don't loan it. A simple lesson I learned many years ago. I could have lost friendships over it, but instead I chose to forgive the debts because yes... at the time I could afford it, and I helped my friend out. They've paid me back in different ways that were probably much more valuable than the simple monetary sum I gave them.
However I'm guessing it's too late for you to take that approach. So I'd suggest you consider the money gone and just be pleasantly surprised if you ever see it again. | |
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| So my Ex owes me money....
Posted: 6/6/2009 8:22:40 PM | First and fore most, don't go around her or her place of work,or her home. she can screw you by saying your stalking her. she probably doesn't have the money. you can do one of 2 things. take her to court and and get a judgement for the money. that doesn't mean a whole lot. and she probably won't pay it after being ordered to...
sencond, you could just forget the money. and let it go. because she doesn't seem to be a good freind. she's basically out of your life. and you don't have to haul her around any more. so your $300 dollars will be worth it's value in time.
and if she comes calling again. just put her in her place. and leave her out in the cold.. like the web site says. plenty of fish.. and take from some one who has traveled every where. there are billions of women on this planet. so she really doesn't matter. just enjoy not having to put up with her crap any more.. and stop texting her. she really doesn't care about ya. | |
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| So my Ex owes me money....
Posted: 6/7/2009 6:30:08 AM | OP just do this and thats
1 = Write the $300 off
2 = Write her off
3 = Stop doing things for her
4 = Take it as lesson learned
5 = MOVE THE HELL ON
6 = Get your car fixed by other means | |
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| So my Ex owes me money....
Posted: 6/7/2009 6:55:08 AM | You are just hurt and angry right now.
An ugly situation. I would blow it off and hope sometime in the future she grows a conscience and pays it back.
Don't lend money to ex's and stay out of their beds...or...this kind of thing happens.
You have to have some ownership of your choices in life. | |
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| So my Ex owes me money....
Posted: 6/7/2009 7:20:40 AM | Do NOT EVER loan money to friends and family that you cannot afford to lose unless you are also willing to lose that friend or family member.
And if you want to get your money back, draw up a LEGAL document outlining the repayment plan. Otherwise, you are up the creek without a paddle.
If you are out $300, consider yourself lucky--try in excess of $3,000. | |
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| So my Ex owes me money....
Posted: 6/7/2009 7:32:23 AM | OP, you have done this to yourself. Let it be your lesson. I do feel for you. I just wish you could read it with somebody elses eyes and see yourself creating this. Threaten her with small claims court and keep your emotions out of it. That the best I can tell you. It sucks doesnt it? Hope you will not even think about it next time. My god man, people usually need to be told heartwrenching stories to become suckers like that, and for you it was just about a phone????
I could care less about her douche bag boyfriend..
So why mention it? It's interesting that the word NOT got accidentally dropped out. | |
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| So my Ex owes me money....
Posted: 6/7/2009 8:03:05 AM | So youve been having sex with her and dont care about the boyfreind"Douche Bag"
Now I know where she works, when she works and where and lives..
screams stalker...
I think its not about the money...I'm sure if she said lets get it on you would probably tell her to forget about the money.. | |
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| So my Ex owes me money....
Posted: 6/7/2009 8:16:50 AM | sheesh...I am betting that as long as you were still getting a little something something
the money wasn't all that important was it?
I have "loaned" money to people in the past. NEVA has a man repaid the loan not sure whats up with that? The women have been good about it though. Makes you scratch your chin eh?
OP next time get some colladeral or skip the needy chicks. | |
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| So my Ex owes me money....
Posted: 6/7/2009 8:22:37 AM | Loans are what banks offer. My middle name is not Bank of America. Chalk it up to experience. Did you think you would get her back by loaning her the money?
This is one of those "nice guy" traits that will get men no respect and a bunch of headaches every time. | |
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| So my Ex owes me money....
Posted: 6/7/2009 8:26:06 AM | From a guy who helped his ex out plenty of times and got burnt bad.....let the money go, let her go and move on. She's got issues....stay away. Get yourself out there and find another girlfriend, another way to fix your car and forget about the whole darn thing,
and remember, the best revenge is to live and be happy. | |
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| So my Ex owes me money....
Posted: 6/7/2009 8:30:29 AM | I agree with pretty much everyone else...forget about the money and move on.
I also think you need to get your priorities straight. If you are struggling with the economic times, and can't come up with $300 for a car repair, you probably shouldn't be giving away $300 to your ex for a phone. | |
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| So my Ex owes me money....
Posted: 6/7/2009 8:38:03 AM | I do sympathise OP. But twas very norty and pretty childish of you referencing the other bf - thats really none of you business - if she wants to lie and exploit and make up all manner of excuses, even with the intent to hurt or sting a little its her business and frankly yer better of, imo, without this wee cheeky madam. Besides she will never truly be happy if it perversely makes you feel any better, which you probably will
She owes you dosh (cash). Frankly, as someone else said, I think you should quit yer whining or reciprocal pettiness and chalk this un up to experience and forget her.
Yee i know it a lot of cash ( I know its the principle ;0). Decency prevents these types coughing up. What on account of this ilk being devoid of it (decency)
But, hell why not...forget the confrontation merely seek legal advice if you want to be pettier, which can be fun and teach a majestic lesson and make em hate you for being 100% right
But forget the idea of confrontation and stalking like behaviour around her/workplace - as its no on, that type of bullying behaviour.
So erm in summary I favour the chalking it up to experience
Sorry, move on. | |
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| So my Ex owes me money....
Posted: 6/7/2009 9:28:35 AM | Take her to court...
Really though, NEVER loan money to friends.
Seriously you say 300 dollars is basically nothing yet you're making this big deal about it. If someone doesn't have a credit card with a 300 dollar limit there's something wrong. | |
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| So my Ex owes me money....
Posted: 6/7/2009 9:36:04 AM | | Op, I have to agree with the majority here and say let it go and if you get the money back in the future it's a bonus. I'll also add that if your ex had repaid as you agreed at $25 a week it is unlikely that you would have had the money to use to repair your car as those small sums are often swallowed up by every day living costs. | |
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| So my Ex owes me money....
Posted: 6/7/2009 9:40:20 AM |
if your ex had repaid as you agreed at $25 a week it is unlikely that you would have had the money to use to repair your car
Excellent point. I think most of all you are just hurt and disgusted by her treatment of you which I can completely understand. | |
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| So my Ex owes me money....
Posted: 6/7/2009 10:09:26 AM | | I hate to bear the bad news, but you won't be seeing your money. Consider this a lesson learn. If you can't afford to part with the $300 in the first place, you shouldn't have loaned it out. I'm afraid that your Ex is more of the pond scum. DON'T EVER LOAN OUT MORE $$$ THAN YOU CAN AFFORD TO LOSE. It's that simple. | |
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| So my Ex owes me money....
Posted: 6/7/2009 10:40:26 AM | Guess what? You can air your grievance on syndicated TV. You know, that thing we all used to watch before they invented the Internet.
feedback@peoplescourt.com | |
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