| introvert
Posted: 6/12/2009 1:25:07 PM | so ive had dates before that have went fine
im an introvert meaning im mostly private, not shy, but im not your typical blabbermouth
well anyways
after having a terrible night the guy kept going on and on about how he doesnt like quit girls and tried to force me to talk
that just made it worse and from that point the date was over
so guys a question...
are you guys really attracted to the type of girl that will talk your ear off?
or does anyone like the more mysterious type of girl? | |
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| introvert
Posted: 6/12/2009 1:27:52 PM | | It depends on how insecure the person is and how much validation they need! I prefer someone who follows the flow of conversation and wouldn't mind if they are quiet as long as they didn't expect me to be much different! | |
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| introvert
Posted: 6/12/2009 1:31:21 PM | | I'm not shy but I'm not a big talker. I prefer to sit back and observe. Maybe silence scares him? | |
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| introvert
Posted: 6/12/2009 1:33:20 PM | i agree.
SMALL TALK IS SO BORING
i dont mind listening to what others have to say, in fact i am a great listener...i just dont really like to talk alot. | |
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| introvert
Posted: 6/12/2009 1:35:23 PM | It can be easier at first to date a girl who talks a lot. All you have to do is look attentive. However, that gets old pretty quick.
You are very pretty and extremely young. You're not going to have ANY problems getting guys.
Perhaps it might be helpful if you asked yourself what kind of man you want. Do you want a quiet guy, or a loud guy or something in between? Then try to look for guys like that.
~Justin | |
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| introvert
Posted: 6/12/2009 1:36:39 PM | Well, never been a fan of someone who won't let me get a word in edgeways...
But, the "shy quiet types" can be wonderful.
Some people might take your quiet nature to be a sign that you're not interested. Thinking that if you're not saying much, you must not want to know about them.
You just have to show them otherwise. You don't have to be "chatty". But you can just let them know that you're interested, and that you're enjoying your time with them.
I wouldn't try to force you to talk. If you're quiet, you're quiet. But I would hope to have some sign of interest on your part. It can be a silent one, a touch, a hug, something to let me know how you feel. | |
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| introvert
Posted: 6/12/2009 1:37:21 PM | hahah
my dream guy:
jim carrey-eternal sunshine of the spotless mind
he is so quiet yet passionate
thats how i am
but i would not mind dating a talkative guy i have before
he just has to appreciate me for me. and im an introvert! | |
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| introvert
Posted: 6/12/2009 1:48:24 PM |
But, the "shy quiet types" can be wonderful. LOL. Or at least they pretend to be. ;)
The shy and quiet ones are rather overlooked which is a shame. You know they have the wonderful qualities that you might be looking for. | |
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| introvert
Posted: 6/12/2009 1:51:36 PM | | Yeah, sounds as if your guy has some issues with insecurity to be sure. He put all the pressure on you to carry on the conversation portion of the evening. Most unfair. Don't date people like that. Me, I'm at home holding up my end of conversation, but then, it's okay for two people (who ARE a bit more secure) to just sit together and enjoy the silence. You're right - small talk can often sound forced, uncomfortable, and no one leaves happy. Sometimes just try enjoying silent company than forced and vapid conversation. You'll have fewer ulcers that way. | |
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| introvert
Posted: 6/12/2009 1:55:20 PM | "hahah
my dream guy:
jim carrey-eternal sunshine of the spotless mind
he is so quiet yet passionate"
I think that movie shows that someone like that is complimented well by an extrovert! I liked Kate Winslet in that movie and she was a perfect compliment to Jim Carrey to get him out of his shell! | |
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| introvert
Posted: 6/12/2009 2:01:12 PM | I'm sure 2 quiet people can get along just fine. Jenna I think you should go find a guy like that and give it a try.
~Justin | |
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| introvert
Posted: 6/12/2009 2:08:03 PM | If I felt like I had to carry a conversation after a while I would tire of it (and him).
Actually, I have met several "shy" types. Usually they will open up after a few minutes, but if they don't I'm not sure that I would be content to just sit and admire them. (but I'm not a guy) | |
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| introvert
Posted: 6/12/2009 4:49:08 PM | | Wow I have neve met a woman that didn't talk my ear off, I just rode two hours in a car with a woman that didn't stop talking until she walked into her house. I think most men would love a woman that understood that value of silence. Please don't change we need more like you. | |
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| introvert
Posted: 6/12/2009 5:23:39 PM | I can definitely relate to this. I consider myself an introvert as well and I just prefer to be a listener with the occasional input. I prefer guys who talk a lot because it makes me feel comfortable and it just shows that the guy is really confident and comfortable as well.
Yup, I'm looking for my opposite. I'll be reserved and quiet. You be loud and outgoing.  | |
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| introvert
Posted: 6/12/2009 6:41:37 PM | Ahhh...another victim to the lost art of conversation. One talks...then the other.
Sign of the imtes I guess.
He who is loudest MUST be right. | |
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| introvert
Posted: 6/12/2009 6:46:23 PM | I think Iwill start counting my blessings if I ever meet the quiet type.
You should count yours . Talking about issues just gets people in trouble. | |
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| introvert
Posted: 6/12/2009 6:47:08 PM |
are you guys really attracted to the type of girl that will talk your ear off?
or does anyone like the more mysterious type of girl?
I talk a lot, and yet I have been told by many men that I am the most mysterious and intriguing woman whom they have met. It isn't how much one says, it is what one says.
And how one smiles. | |
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| introvert
Posted: 6/12/2009 6:51:52 PM | A person can be a real blabbermouth, but put them in the company of someone and they can be very quiet.
I like small talk and big talk, but I can have completely different types of convos with two different men. With some men, I can enjoy a serious discussion on almost anything, others it can only be on a topic that is familiar to us both.
I don't like being the only talker. I need feedback in my conversations. I like to listen and talk, to me that's communication. Sometimes, the other person talks for a lengthy period and I just acknowledge. Other times, I talk for a lenghthy period. Back and back, give and take is what I enjoy.
I had a wonderful conversation with a man on here on MSN. I was totally shocked because the majority of men I have tried MSN with, fail miserably. They were unable to maintain a conversation. However with this man, the back and forth was wonderful and we even covered religion. At the end of the conversation, he told me I was a great person to have a conversation/communicate with. It was a very nice compliment. He worked in radio journalism so his skills were quite good. I also learned a few things during the conversation which was nice.
So all that said, this topic is really too difficult to pin down to a type or to a person.
I'd also point out that someone can seem to be an extrovert when they really are an introvert. I'm seemingly quite outgoing and can talk about many topics, but I like to keep them general. For example, in the sex and dating threads, I will make a suggestion about something but I won't phrase it as "I did this" or "when I did it, we tried this first". I'll say "it is good to", "one could try this". I'm really quite personal, but open to those closest to me. The level of comfort and trust you have in someone determines how fast you open up to them. | |
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| introvert
Posted: 6/12/2009 6:53:22 PM | I don't mind a blabber mouth guy as long what he says is worth listening to.
The quiet type can be hard to make conversation with...then you will feel like a blabber mouth too because you are trying to motivate the other to engage into a conversation.
Now, thats different to a person who only talk when he need something or only hear himself. | |
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| introvert
Posted: 6/12/2009 6:55:44 PM |
are you guys really attracted to the type of girl that will talk your ear off?
Attracted? Yes. It’s easy to get acquainted with a talkative girl. But that advantage is not long-lasting.
or does anyone like the more mysterious type of girl?
I like a more thoughtful personality. I don’t mind silences in the conversation. But I’m not attracted to someone who tries to be mysterious. | |
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| introvert
Posted: 6/12/2009 6:59:20 PM | | ^^^that's a great way of putting it. Thoughtful. I think many people who are thoughtful are mistaken as "mysterious". | |
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| introvert
Posted: 6/12/2009 7:11:26 PM | | if you need to talk then talk | |
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| introvert
Posted: 6/12/2009 7:15:33 PM | | There's a difference between being quiet and being resistant to communication. What is your point in getting together? Your date is not looking for extravagant oratory. But a word missing where there ought to be one is as telling as a wrong or offensive one. And what other means are you making available for him to find out who and what you are? You have an attractive enough exterior that you'll always be able to find guys to use you for that. But sooner or later they will ALL realize it doesn't matter how fancy the container is depending what 'it's full of’' or if it's completely empty. | |
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| introvert
Posted: 6/12/2009 7:29:05 PM | I am slightly introverted and I find it difficult talking with my sister who is much more introverted...Other words, I dont like doing all of the talking...odds are is what you made the guy do...
You probably would do better with somebody more extroverted... | |
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| introvert
Posted: 6/12/2009 7:36:28 PM | jenna, i talk all the time and irritate men to the point of suicide. Sometimes i wish i could be quiet and mysterious ... thing is, men like to hear themselves talk and i wont let them, why? because most of them are boring and talk about sports they never even practised or ex girlfriends who stay forever young ... sighhhh
Ok, what I am trying to say is: be yourself, if you don't feel like talking, don't! | |
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