| Empty Promises!
Posted: 6/19/2009 6:41:43 PM | I was just wondering if anyone here had a similar experience like this one...
I have only been on here for about 6 months now and this is my first online dating site, I was contacted from a beautiful lady that really got my butterflies in my stomach going about 3 weeks now, she liked my pictures and profile so much that she gave me her number right off the get go, I also really liked what I have seen and read so I called her up and we talked for about an hour...our personalities, beliefs etc! were a perfect match...we had so much in common from the stuff that we like to do, sports, music...etc! and she kept sending me gifts through the email on here and saying that she can't wait to see and meet me...we couldn't stop talking to each other trying to find out more informaion about one another, so we kept our conversations going now for 2 weeks via phone calls and text messages.
The last time I talked to her was on Wed. night and I popped the question about meeting up for a coffee/drink or whatever just so that I can see her with my own 2 eyes, she accepted to meet on Fri. (today) after work...that would mean I would have to drive about 1.5 hours from my house just to see her, I didn't care about the long distance because I was so excited to finally meet her.
Now here is where the problem is...I text messaged her and asked to comfirm a meeting place/time...no reply...I called her 3 times throughout the course of the day...still no reply, well it looks like a dead end...ce la vie!
Another thing that I just don't understand is when I got home and came on the website to send her one final message through POF she is nowhere to be found...either she blocked me or deleted her profile...weird...since her profile was on this morning.
That really is sad getting peoples expectations up just so that they could crush them...damn liars!
Sorry but I just had to vent a little because I put time and effort to actually meet someone that lit a spark in me that has been fizzled for quite sometime, I guess it's true...nice guy's do finish last!  | |
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| Empty Promises!
Posted: 6/19/2009 7:04:38 PM | Having had a sort of similar experience, I completely understand your frustration. It sounds to me like she got scared and didn't know what to do. It is really easy to talk to someone through electronic messaging and on the phone, it is that first meeting that can be so nerve racking that it can kill something before it REALLY starts. She might have been afraid that you were going to expect more from her physically than she would have been willing to give or vice versa. I wouldn't take it personally....just remember that what's meant to be will be. I know that's probably not what you want to hear right now because it still stings, but don't let it stop you from continuing to look. And I am pretty sure that she is probably beating herself up about it too (although I don't know her so I may be wrong), and you never know...a few days from now she may realize how big of a mistake she made and want another shot...
good luck! =0) | |
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| Empty Promises!
Posted: 6/19/2009 7:08:27 PM | This is one of the reasons I believe internet dating leaves a lot to be desired.
Sorry to hear it bro. Keep taking the high road. The right girl will appreciate it. | |
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| Empty Promises!
Posted: 6/19/2009 7:21:35 PM | | I know what you mean about empty promises.. Is is a shame she did that too you.. I always believe in talking and emailing to get to know a person also.. But to set a meeting and then be ignored is an outrage.. You have every right to vent, but believe me, all women are not like that.. Nice guys do not finish last and I keep believing that nice ladys don't finish last either.. Keep your chin up hun.. She will come along.... Take care | |
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| Empty Promises!
Posted: 6/19/2009 7:53:21 PM | | Could be that she is married, in a relationship, her photos are not hers, she has lied about something and the reality of meeting hit home..................................................... | |
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VF102
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Joined: 8/30/2008
Msg: 6 | |
| Empty Promises!
Posted: 6/19/2009 8:52:20 PM | The only luck that I have been having with online dating is attracting psychos and users. Of course my friend James tried to hook me up and she ended up being a nut job so I guess sometimes a guy can't win. lol :P
Jason the Fed | |
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| Empty Promises!
Posted: 6/19/2009 10:17:42 PM | | Something like that happened to me last year. It really sucks because in my case I was stood up at the restaurant! I still wonder why since we had really hit it off in chatting on the phone, shared the same interests, etc. I had even spoken to him on the phone earlier in the day and we were still on for the evening. It really stung that he did that. But what can one do, but move on. In your case it could be like someone else has already stated: she is married, her pictures don't reflect her as she is today or anything that could paint her as a liar. It really is hard out here in the dating world. | |
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| Empty Promises!
Posted: 6/20/2009 4:18:54 AM | That really sucks. I don't think it has anything to do with you being a nice guy and much more to do with her not being so nice.
I have never had this happen but have read and heard numerous stories.
This is why I prefer to email a couple times, talk on the phone once or twice and then meet in person. No expectations are built up and most all of the getting to know you stuff happens face to face.
While I know a lot of people are really uncomfortable with the idea of meeting so quickly, all I can really say is that I've never been stood up. I tend to view on line dating as an introduction and treat it as such. I don't feel I can get to know someone through this medium or on the phone so I don't spend a lot of time with either before meeting. I have had people discontinue contacting me when I make it clear that I prefer to meet in person fairly quickly and I gotta say I much prefer that to the idea of getting stood up for a meet. | |
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| Empty Promises!
Posted: 6/20/2009 5:26:41 AM | Sorry, cupcake, it happens to the best of us.
Chalk it up as experience and move on.
You're pretty hot, claim to be a good person, have your ducks in a row, someone will come your way (in person) to make a happy life together.
Just not her.
- maybe she has some horrible disease and it really is for the best.
Learn from this. Next time meet up for coffee earlier.
Say "I'm in the area end of the week, would you like me to buy you a drink after work?", see reaction.
ALL of these fake profiles aren't too eager to meet too early. If at all.
ps. Don't EVER say you're a "nice" guy - "nice" means "spineless weasel" on this site
;-)
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| Empty Promises!
Posted: 6/20/2009 10:45:28 AM | | It's a lesson learned that's for sure...thanks for the tip on the "nice" word lol! | |
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| Empty Promises!
Posted: 6/20/2009 12:49:24 PM | | 95% of women on here are to get compliments and boost their ego, they want you to message them and tell them how beautiful they are...I checked out your profile and you are good looking (no homo)....So its unfortunate but just move on. | |
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| Empty Promises!
Posted: 6/21/2009 6:02:10 AM | | Send her a gift - a letter bomb. | |
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| Empty Promises!
Posted: 6/21/2009 6:57:18 AM | | We do usually finish last but he who laughs last laughs loudest! I had givin up on this online thing completely and was in the process of deleting my profile for good when i got a message from someone thats showed me i can still fall for someone. There's a lot a girls who like to play on us good guys but there is also a few wonderfull women left, you just gotta have a little faith. | |
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| Empty Promises!
Posted: 6/21/2009 7:58:34 AM | I hate to say it, but this is just the reality of internet dating. I have done it for a long time, and have learned that only about 10% of the people you meet online are REALLY that person. If they just disappear, that most likely means they were lying about something. Also, many people are on here just for the fun of it, the thrill of talking to someone new, entertaining themselves. Many have zero intention of really meeting. Take it all with a grain of salt, and if you're lucky, a real woman will pop up and turn out to be exactly who she says she is. It does happen, just not often.  | |
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Posted: 6/22/2009 1:37:57 AM | Thanks for all of your comments, advice...etc!
This internet dating is new to me so I figured that I would give it a shot but I really do miss the old days where you actually meet someone in person for the first time without all of the emails (Interviews), pictures and what not before hand...then you know automatically...you get what you see!  | |
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| Empty Promises!
Posted: 6/22/2009 2:14:54 AM | | Hey, everyone I talk to ( you know, out in the real world, I have to leave the house sometimes ) says internet dating sites are the worst place to meet people. I guess for the most part, they are right. I have met two women ( one on here, one somewhere else ) so it actually happens. But sometimes you get the real losers that arent worth the time to text message them. And if you read enough posts and forums, everybody here has a psychosis ( not the luchador ). So the best thing to do, be real picky. REAL Picky. It works, but until i see that real results exist, i aint claiming a thing. | |
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| Empty Promises!
Posted: 6/22/2009 6:04:55 AM |
going about 3 weeks now,
I think is some of the problem. I am not saying its your fault, but the meeting should have took place before three weeks of texting and phone calls. The sooner you meet, the sooner you can find out if there is chemistry, and the sooner you can stop wasting time texting and phone calls.
I actually had one female on here tell me she doesnt meet someone until she talks to them for 2 weeks in im, or email.....that is a huge waste if you ask me...
she sounds like flake OP, I guess my only advice is to try to meet up sooner and avoid all the texts and phone calls for three weeks.... | |
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| Empty Promises!
Posted: 6/22/2009 9:40:39 AM |
our personalities, beliefs etc! were a perfect match...
Obviously they were not..... go study some more. Get more realistic. | |
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| Empty Promises!
Posted: 6/22/2009 10:31:10 PM | I hear that! I hate when a man gets my expectations up and then I meet them and the are nothing that they claimed to be. So I can on guess, maybe she was scred to meet you, got a boyfriend before you, or she wasn't what she told you she was and didn't want you to see the truth. Sorry, it's sucks when that happens and I feel your pain.  | |
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| Empty Promises!
Posted: 6/23/2009 11:39:42 AM | women (and men) are like busses, if you miss one, there's always another one coming along later...
chalk it up to experience, and believe that she is the one who missed out, not you. | |
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| Empty Promises!
Posted: 6/23/2009 11:48:51 AM | | OP - your a good looking dude and have a nice profile so don't waste your time worrying about it too much....me thinks the lady was hiding something and ran off. | |
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| Empty Promises!
Posted: 6/23/2009 1:14:14 PM | | Maybe she was married and just wanted the excitement of talking to another man? Driving 1.5hours? nah- not my style. | |
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| Empty Promises!
Posted: 6/23/2009 4:07:51 PM | | I pretty much agree with everything kdogg34 said, it's best not to take anything that's said online too seriously, or get your hopes up too much until you've had your first meet with the person. | |
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| Empty Promises!
Posted: 6/23/2009 5:33:24 PM | | Life is full of empty promises.... | |
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| Empty Promises!
Posted: 6/23/2009 5:37:07 PM | Awwe that sucks!!! I think some people on here just want penpals. Don't take it personal.....keep fishing | |
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