| | what's good content for sending the first message to someone?Page 1 of 1 | | I'm new to the site and I'm still learning the etiquette for this sort of stuff. I sent over 50 messages out and got next to nothing for responses. I did not do datespamming with the copy paste thing. I looked at over 50 profiles, wrote 50 different short messages that were tailored to mutual interests, and it all took several hours. I'm trying to be honest as possible here, but I'm not really sure what a good first contact message would contain, point by point. Thanks a lot for any help. | |
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| what's good content for sending the first message to someone?
Posted: 6/25/2009 6:58:39 PM | | I have definitely experienced the same thing, so dont think that you are the only one. I have tried being funny, connecting mutual interests, or just plain telling them that I thought they were cute and I would like to get to know them and got nothing. | |
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| what's good content for sending the first message to someone?
Posted: 6/25/2009 8:21:34 PM | | From what I understand it happens all the time. I hope it was helpful. You go first will likely offer some good advice as well. I had no idea it wasn't good to talk about my 39 felony warrants and the fact that I'm wanted in 15 states. Who'd-a-thunk it? | |
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| what's good content for sending the first message to someone?
Posted: 6/25/2009 8:55:47 PM | Hi, Paradox.
BTW, love the username.
I sent over 50 messages out and got next to nothing for responses. I did not do datespamming with the copy paste thing. I looked at over 50 profiles, wrote 50 different short messages that were tailored to mutual interests, and it all took several hours.
While somewhat off-topic for this forum, I'd like to chime in with a few thoughts.
You've been here 10 days, and sent 50 emails. To me, and I'll freely grant you that this view might put me squarely within the minority, that number seems like a LOT. Including my various previous stints here, all of which combined add up to months and months, I've not sent 50 different emails total.
It all boils down to a preference of how to best utilize your time here but, to borrow from Mr. Lieb's analogy from another thread, an approach that relies more on the shotgun than the sniper's rifle is an approach that, to me, seems less focused and less likely to achieve your ultimate goal -- finding the girl of your dreams.
I mean -- 50 emails took several hours of your time? I'd like to think that the best results come from spending days, even weeks or more, sifting through the thousands of words and pictures this site offers.
All I'm suggesting is that a more selective approach might, in the long run and even the short, lead to a more gratifying result.
But, then again, what the hell do I know? I'm still here, gabbing away in this forum. ;)
vvvvvvvv EDIT: I wish. More like the other way around! | |
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| what's good content for sending the first message to someone?
Posted: 6/11/2011 4:32:09 PM | Why would we want women eating out of our grimy hands?
Okay - 1st contacts are troublesome- they're strangers.. I can't provide anything more than commentary; no guidance.
My saved history shows 12 notes sent over three years, five got back, chatted a bit. One I met. -- she had cardboard on her windows, no heat, a wrecking claw up her sleeve; truly the finest most amazing pianist and conversationalist, huddled beneath a sleeping bag.
My intro note was, "you're up late".
Most I contacted had no possibility of building a relationship- or so I assumed. That may have been why they got back- or .. I dunno - possibly I missed pointers in the post-contact gambit. There were more that I spoke to - but women seem to delete profiles like the rest of us eat cookies- or kalamari, or whatever-- they're in and out like spirits in the night.
Notes to me from folk I later met:
"Are you going to the POF get-together?"
"You'd be perfect if you weren't completely inappropriate".
It helps if the profile supports what you're saying - build a presence so someone can imagine what you'd be like to spend a while around. | |
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| what's good content for sending the first message to someone?
Posted: 6/11/2011 8:22:01 PM | 1st EMAIL TIPS:
1) Use an interesting/awesome Subject Line that piques her interest and gets her wanting to read more. Such as… “WOW!” or “I can’t believe you said…” or “Beam me up…” or “Tulips or Polar Bears?” or “No Fair!” or “You know you wanna” or “I dare ya” or “The genie in the lamp said…”
2) Keep the 1st email short. 3-5 sentences tops.
3) MENTION something from her profile so she knows you read it. “How are you doing today” s*cks! It’s okay to compliment her, but nothing sexual unless you and she are both looking for FWB (friends w/bennies). Great eyes, fantastic smile work. Hot bod doesn’t.
4) ASK 1 QUESTION to keep the convo going. Be interested in HER. Do not ask “do you want to go out with me?” Women need to feel ya out first (no, not like that… tsk tsk)… i.e. women need to feel safe and want to see IF there’s enuf connection to say yes to a date. 2-4 emails are usually enuf for both to see if Datesville is in your future.
5) Sign your REAL first name. Women like men who share their 1st name in the 1st email.
Best! DenverSky5280  | |
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