| Not sure she was that into me
Posted: 7/1/2009 6:56:00 PM | | I went on a first date and I came away from unsure if things had gone well or not.I have a tendency to overread people but my dating experince has been if there was uncertainty over how the date went things didnt seem to work out.Basically things have only worked from me when the woman was really into me right from the get go.I asked her if she wanted to go out again next week and she said yes.I told her I would call her Sunday night and she said fine.She has plans with some of her girlfriends Saturday and Sunday and she said it would be ok to call her Sunday night to make plans for next week.My worries arent from what she said but more of her body language.She was nice enough but seemed a bit cool ,playing it closer tp the vest than I was.Also the date lasted maybe an hour and 15 mins.I admit I thought it would be a little longer. | |
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| Not sure she was that into me
Posted: 7/1/2009 7:33:18 PM | She isn't in to you.
If she was, she'd happily break her "date" with her "girlfriends' to go out again, rather than agreeing you could call on Sunday night to try to set something up for a week later.
She was trying to be nice and polite, but if she wanted to make time, she could... and she didn't. | |
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| Not sure she was that into me
Posted: 7/1/2009 7:37:48 PM | This is going to happen. Maybe you wasnt her expectations?
And if so, move on.. Sitting around worried if she will want to
see you again or if you will hear from her again is, All-Bad...
Keep looking. She might have been your type. But keep looking anyways.
Best thing to do is have Few people on your list, it helps the down side
of being rejected And helps the tension because you will say to your self
" Hey, who cares, im here to have fun then sit and be worried if she likes me
or not. "
Be the ball! Bounce! | |
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| Not sure she was that into me
Posted: 7/1/2009 7:56:19 PM | | I don't know if she's into you or not but because she wouldn't break a previously scheduled outing with her friends does not mean she wasn't into you. It simply means she isn't the type of person who would ditch her friends for a guy she's gone out with once. I realize how difficult it is not to over analyze sometimes but unless you make the call to follow up you'll never know! Good luck to you :) | |
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| Not sure she was that into me
Posted: 7/1/2009 9:17:21 PM | | Maybe she wants to hang out with her friends because she is not able to see them very often or they're from out of town and she doesn't want to miss out on an opportunity to see them. There's always time for dating. | |
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| Not sure she was that into me
Posted: 7/1/2009 9:21:04 PM | | Don't start to over evaluate how things went. If you do then you are gonna drive yourself nuts. Just wait until Sunday and give her a call and make plans to go out again. If she does go out with you again then you have nothing to worry about. | |
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| Not sure she was that into me
Posted: 7/1/2009 10:30:31 PM | | Let me add some more information about this situation that makes me doubtful.I asked her through a message here at pof if she wanted to go out this Wendesday night last Thurday.She replied back Friday that Wednesday was good at 6:30 as that was a day she nothing "booked".I had given her my cell number last week and she called me Monday morning saying that she was looking forward to meeting me wWednesday night.At this time i was pretty much thinking that the evening was free for her and that we had plenty of time to get to know each other.Shortly into the date she says she has to reply to a text from a girlfriend and she started to text back .As we are ordering she told me that she didnt want to eat too much as she was meeting the girlfriend who had texted her to watch"so you think you can dance" and that they had a tradition of watching this show every Wednesday night and they would have have food to eat ,so she didnt want to eat too much before she went to meet this friend of hers.We did split two appetisers but she ate sparingly.Maybe its just me but I did ask her out way in advance and she told me her schedule was all clear but then once we meet she can only stay an hour or so because she has to keep up her tradition of watching"so you think you can dance " with her girlfriend.I mean if the situation was reversed and I did the same thing to a woman she would write me off as a flake most likely .I was caught off guard after being told that her evening was clear ,then being told she has something else to do that night.The impression I have gotten from her emails is that her schedule with her girlfriends is pretty packed and that everything else is scheduled around whatever they have going on. | |
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| Not sure she was that into me
Posted: 7/1/2009 10:37:41 PM | | Maybe you feel like you are in competition for this woman's attention with her friends. I dunno what to tell you. Yes if the roles were reversed you would be bashed pretty bad. I would still give her the benefit of a doubt. | |
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| Not sure she was that into me
Posted: 7/1/2009 10:39:06 PM | She's not into you....sorry....
Tradition or not ...the text she received was the standard '911' text...meaning 'Do you need to get the hell out of there?'...
Obviously...you know what her reply was...
Move on and good luck with the next one!
 | |
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| Not sure she was that into me
Posted: 7/2/2009 1:05:47 AM | | sorry bud, but she is soooooo not into you...the whole tradition of watching that show is a load of crap. Even if it was true, we have technology called a vcr, or dvr, teevo, there are so many things. I agree with the 911 text thing, and that she was just trying to get away. That whole other thing that not ditching friends is a load of garbage also, friends will always be there if they are really good friends, plus they would understand if you were trying to date someone and wanted to spend some time with that date to get to know them.....So all in all....MOVE ON!!! | |
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| Not sure she was that into me
Posted: 7/2/2009 3:19:11 AM | An hour and fifteen minutes? If Im into a guy its atleast 4 hours.... and then maybe breakfast...what the hell..lunch too. lol
she aint into u. she spent the requisite time with u and then bolted. | |
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| Not sure she was that into me
Posted: 7/2/2009 5:09:39 AM | I would have to guess not into you but on the other side of things I always keep things short and sweet the first time out so saying she had plans could mean nothing. She agreed to meet you but that doesn't mean that she intended to block off the whole night.
I have squeezed in a meet knowing I had things to do later on and said so in the beginning..had nothing to do with the meet or me ditching the person. | |
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| Not sure she was that into me
Posted: 7/2/2009 5:55:23 AM | | Texting during a date is a "no no". Over that television show, is a BIGGER "no no". She obviously is not that into the whole dating thing, and personally, if someone said that to me at the dinner table, I would get up and leave. She seems busy and may have been trying to be "polite". Some people are too afraid to admit there is not the attraction or desire that BOTH parties may have been hoping for. I would lose interest with her, and move forward. Unless there is a dire emergency, the cell phones, including texting can stay OFF . | |
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| Not sure she was that into me
Posted: 7/2/2009 7:12:56 AM | | Since the opinion is leaning towards she is not into me, which is myfeeling too, should I even call her Sunday?I dont care about groveling at this point.I had my suspicions after a few post thru POF that she was holding me at arms length and that instead of of date I was going to get an audition, which was what I ended up with.Even after 5 or 6 posts she hadnt given me contact info.I gave her my cell number on about the 7th post and almost 3 weeks and she called me on Monday morning.That was the only time we spoke on the phone before we went out last night.I think the whole time I was just being evaluated from a distance and then I didnt pass the job interview.It seems like we could have done this in less than 3 weeks and moved on rather than drag it all out just to end in a dud like it did. | |
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| Not sure she was that into me
Posted: 7/2/2009 7:21:56 AM | | Why call her? She texted a friend during dinner to go watch a TV show. Sorry, but if I was interested in a man, I sure as hell would not be texting a freind then going to watch tv. Move forward. Do yourself the favor. If she was interested, she would have called you by now. Trust me. You were not being evaluated, you were being used for a meal. Sorry, but that is how it reads. Find someone worth the time. She is a waste of time. The amount of time you DID e mail her, she did not even get back to you. The only time I play "chase" is with my dog. Find someone who is interested, not looking for a meal ticket. | |
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| Not sure she was that into me
Posted: 7/2/2009 8:42:46 AM | I agree with ImAHotMess, whenever I am out with a woman and feel I am competing for her attention, I politely call the waiter, ask for the check, tell her it was a pleasure meeting and leave. People will treat us how we allow them to. The only thing I do with my BlackBerry is turn it off and place all of my attention on my date. As mature adults, it is important to understand our "power" and not give it away so easily to others. There is nothing a woman can do for me that I can't do for myself, except show some sincere interest in return. I would rather be alone and happy than with someone rude and unhappy. IMHO.  | |
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| Not sure she was that into me
Posted: 7/2/2009 2:57:34 PM | I would trust your instincts if you thought she wasn't "into you". I think it would be a delightful irony to text her on Sunday (don't call) and say "Hello" but don't ask her out again. See what she says. I imagine she won't respond.
On to the next lucky girl! | |
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| Not sure she was that into me
Posted: 7/2/2009 3:23:12 PM | I would suggest you don't bother.....IF she really wants to get together on Sunday, let her message or call you.
Frankly, I think the fact that she spent most of your first meeting texting...she's made it clear so why put yourself out there more.
This way when Sunday comes one of two things will happen...she will either be relieved that you didn't call or text....or she will wonder why you didn't call or text and perhaps get ahold of you. Worse case....she does get ahold of you and asks why you didn't call...tell the truth..say 'The fact that you spent the meeting on the phone making plans with friends, led me to believe you weren't interested'. See what happens from there and perhaps let her chase you a little 
Unfortunately....I believe that relief would be her response....so go make plans for the day for yourself or with someone else....have fun and don't think about it!
Good luck! | |
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| Not sure she was that into me
Posted: 7/2/2009 3:36:56 PM | | I think we could have avoided this long drawn out process that ended up going nowhere if we had talked on the phone sooner rather than posting back and forth for so long.But that was more her choice than mine.We both had pictures of each other so no real surprises looks wise but what I can say stands out now is that I think we have different personalities.I would say she is fairly reserved and tries to be more in control of what she reveals and I am more open.So I feel pretty confident that talking on the phone sooner would have cleared things up a lot faster.But heh live and learn I guess. | |
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| Not sure she was that into me
Posted: 7/2/2009 4:03:33 PM | Let it go....she does not like you...sorry....
If a person wants to do something bad enough, they'll cancel any date, call off work, drive miles to see the person if they like them...
she had her friend call to save her...i can guarantee you , you wont have another date with her because something will miraculously come up...
move on and hopefully you can find someone who is interested.
good luck! | |
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| Not sure she was that into me
Posted: 7/2/2009 4:06:44 PM | Yeah, you're "probably" right, but roll with it anyway. Call her on Sunday night. If she doesn't sound that into getting together, in the sort of "maybe; I'll have to see if I'm free", just put the ball in her court. Tell her to give YOU a call when she knows about her schedule for the next week, and you'll go from there.
Ball in her court is easy. If she doesn't call, you know the answers. Have no expectations in the mean time. Happy fishing! | |
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| Not sure she was that into me
Posted: 7/2/2009 8:39:23 PM | If I'm unsure of how someone is reacting to me, I ask! Or else, I give the person my phone number and say I'd like to see him again and to call me. No call is a message that leads to clarity!
Judith | |
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| Not sure she was that into me
Posted: 7/2/2009 8:45:11 PM | | If you gut feelings says that she wasn't into you especially through the body language than I say she's really not into you...the only way you can find out is call her....if she doesn't call u back...then u know your answer... | |
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| Not sure she was that into me
Posted: 7/2/2009 8:56:36 PM | Cccaaaalllllmmmm.
Dddddooowwwwnnnn.
She may be into you and she may not be. Don't worry about it. | |
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| Not sure she was that into me
Posted: 7/2/2009 9:34:09 PM | | When I'm on a date and liking some one, I turn my phone off. I do not want any one interrupting the date. | |
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