| Where are the decent women looking for long term at?
Posted: 7/3/2009 2:13:07 PM | This is in response to the "Decent guys: are they all either taken or gay?" thread that just went up. I'd like to see if this one lasts as long.
Personally, I think most women have no idea what a long term relationship means. They only want to stay around when it's exciting, and as soon as the passion dies down they want to move on to the next thing, each time ACTING as if they are interested in long term, but unable to actually follow through when they "get bored".
Most women on here still list superficial things for interests and superficial qualities in men they are looking for (looks, height, dancing ability, etc..), and couldn't care less about whether a guy would be a good father or husband.
I've stopped even trying and have devoted myself to my business. What do the rest of you guys think? | |
|
| Where are the decent women looking for long term at?
Posted: 7/3/2009 2:24:25 PM |
This is in response to the "Decent guys: are they all either taken or gay?" thread that just went up. I'd like to see if this one lasts as long.
Personally, I think most women have no idea what a long term relationship means. They only want to stay around when it's exciting, and as soon as the passion dies down they want to move on to the next thing, each time ACTING as if they are interested in long term, but unable to actually follow through when they "get bored".
Most women on here still list superficial things for interests and superficial qualities in men they are looking for (looks, height, dancing ability, etc..), and couldn't care less about whether a guy would be a good father or husband.
I've stopped even trying and have devoted myself to my business. What do the rest of you guys think?
I've NEVER met a half way desireable woman who didn't ALREADY have a man in her life. Every women I ever dated (or ended up marrying) just traded up to me or added me to her rotation. There's ALWAYS some dude lurking in the back ground somewhere that they're keeping around . They come on these sites looking to trade up, looking for the BBD (bigger and better deal) . They will add you to their man collection if you have something they want.
The internet and cell phones are excellent tools to keep up this charade. They would get rid of you before they'd get rid of their cell or internet.. | |
|
| |
| Where are the decent women looking for long term at?
Posted: 7/3/2009 2:26:00 PM | I hope you are not taking a defeatist attitude and completely give up. But rather instead of looking for that perfect woman, or the one that wants a long term, or one that YOU have to entertain, you realize that the best way to look for those qualities is by not looking for them. Let them come to you. That does not means that you should stop dating. Because the same problem you have will simply will go into a hiatus and come back unresolved when you decide again to get out of your cocoon.
So my advice is simple, stop taking yourself so serious, get women off the pedestal you have placed them, and go screw up some.
Let the chips fall where they may and the perfect woman will find you, not you her. | |
|
| |
| Where are the decent women looking for long term at?
Posted: 7/3/2009 2:27:01 PM | OP, after reading your profile, I get the impression you are looking for a female version of your self. Good luck with that. 
And just the same as the "other thread", there are good women (and men) everywhere, all around you, either you aren't looking in the right places or dont appeal to the ones that appeal to you.
As a poster in another thread put it, which I thought was quite simple and clever....
Be attractive and Be interesting! That says it all. <img src=http://www.plentyoffish.com/smiles/icon_201.gif border=0>
VVVV Robert....as they say, beauty is in the eye... what is attractive to one, may not be so hot to another. Attraction, does not only apply to someone's physicality, it is about character, compassion, passion, imagination, integrity, humility, truth and trust....to name a few. | |
|
| |
| Where are the decent women looking for long term at?
Posted: 7/3/2009 2:37:50 PM | A note to some of the older women on here - you should check out the profiles of the 20-something women.
I'll see a women say something brilliant in the forums and than they turn out to be in their 50s. There are some great older ladies in here that still grew up with some values, but I think they might not understand how horrible these younger girls have become. Most of them make themselves completely useless but for one thing, then complain that that's all men are interested in. | |
|
| Where are the decent women looking for long term at?
Posted: 7/3/2009 2:53:32 PM |
There are some great older ladies in here that still grew up with some values, but I think they might not understand how horrible these younger girls have become.
I have to say that there's some validity to this statement. When I was dating I went out with women between 27 to 50. And I have to say, the best looking ones were on the average between 41 to 43. Just hot, hot, hot. The twenty something ones were simply put, annoying, kind of reflecting that other thread about "being bored". The 30 somethings were way too intense and serious. Also, I don't know what happens to women in their 30s but their libido sucks. That is when you compare it with a woman that just turn 40, or is 39 and is contemplating that rest of her life.
What you need to do is go out with some of these older women. They are more mature, they are more sexual, they are much hotter that some of the other women. They are more adventurous. They are the ones that will take you to a restaurant and then tell you that they are wearing no underwear and they want before the evening is over to do it in some public place.
Even if at some point you want to settle down with a young woman and have children, these are experiences that simply put you are not going to get out of younger women. | |
|
| Where are the decent women looking for long term at?
Posted: 7/3/2009 3:02:15 PM | I think you are doing what a great many people on these forums do... you are generalizing.
Perhaps more women in your age group are not interested in LTRs, although that would be rather surprising. Perhaps the women you meet are interested in LTRs but, after getting to know you better, they decide that you aren't right for them. There could be a multitude of reasons.
Just because you have yet to find a woman who wants to commit to an LTR with you, does not mean that "most women have no idea what a long term relationship means". Has it ever occurred to you that you maybe using the same criteria to screen out women who would make terrific mothers and wives? Can you honestly say looks and attraction have nothing to do with whom you choose to contact? Then you are an exception, my friend.
You are interested in finding a decent woman who is looking for an LTR. Have you contacted all the age appropriate women in your area? None are worth getting to know? There are NO decent women in Colorado? I find that hard to believe.
It's not that there are no decent women in your area who know what a long term relationship means and who want to be in one. It is that, so far, you have yet to find a woman who meets YOUR criteria and who feels the same about you. It takes time to find the right person. You cannot rush it. But giving up and not trying to find her will guarantee that it will never happen. It's your choice. | |
|
| Where are the decent women looking for long term at?
Posted: 7/3/2009 3:10:22 PM | | tbuddha, I sure hope you do not come off in person as self-absorbed as you did in your profile...might explain some of your difficulty. No one and I mean no one appreciates someone telling them what they should do and what they should think and no one likes to be judged either. Your profile was full of all three. | |
|
| Where are the decent women looking for long term at?
Posted: 7/3/2009 3:15:55 PM | This is my first time visiting the forums and this thread is very interesting. It's sad...with all the venues that exist for the younger generation to find "love", you'd think this is the last place they'd go. At my age, I have no interest in hanging out with a bunch of 20-somethings at your friendly neighborhood bar. I am, however, one of those people who is authentically looking for someone compatible. I've been on and off this site for the better part of six months and it's truly amazing some of the men who don't bother to read my profile yet contact me anyway. Some behaviors have no age limits, I'm afraid.
So, I echo your question... Where are those people of substance and integrity?
Maria | |
|
| Where are the decent women looking for long term at?
Posted: 7/3/2009 3:19:12 PM |
The reason why you cant find them is because they to busy searching for mr. right Actually... the reason you can't find them is that they're in long term relationships and aren't available for dating...  | |
|
| Where are the decent women looking for long term at?
Posted: 7/3/2009 3:23:26 PM | You are interested in finding a decent woman who is looking for an LTR. Have you contacted all the age appropriate women in your area? None are worth getting to know? There are NO decent women in Colorado? I find that hard to believe.
Not really. I'm pretty active in Colorado and I get out to a lot of events and the only women whom I seem to meet are either too old or are there because they are attached to someone who is there. So there are no single women following the same paths as me, so that sucks, cause I like where I'm at. All the younger girls are more into going to clubs.  Those girls are no use to me at all. Searching by interests on here yielded no results, either.
That and they skip over profiles that say "friend" and "must be 420 friendly"
Well, that's my qualifier. If a girl is so brainwashed by Reagan's "Just Say No" campaign that they think something as benign as marijuana is bad or evil, they still are thinking from a pretty childish mindset and have yet to have learned how to use their own brain. I definitely am not interested in any women who blindly conforms to society's norms without questioning with their own integrity.
| |
|
| Where are the decent women looking for long term at?
Posted: 7/3/2009 3:28:21 PM | OutMind on 7/3/2009 5 00 PM
I hope you are not taking a defeatist attitude and completely give up. But rather instead of looking for that perfect woman, or the one that wants a long term, or one that YOU have to entertain, you realize that the best way to look for those qualities is by not looking for them. Let them come to you. That does not means that you should stop dating.
In another thread about a month back, Outmind, you gave me the opposite advice. So, I'm cueing the AFLAC duck for you....
"WWhhhhhhhhaaaaattttt???"
Just kidding. 
He's right, OP. Sometimes, women tend to put themselves and us through the ringer (counterproductive, indeed), before they can put into words, much less see, what it is they really want. Annoying?? Sometimes. Does it make you lose faith? Sometimes.
So, you have to back away, and let them come to you. Not totally give up on looking, but minimize your watershed moments by letting them stop running around like chickens with their heads cut off. | |
|
| Where are the decent women looking for long term at?
Posted: 7/3/2009 3:38:20 PM | Okay...I read your profile and what I can see is that you are looking for a hot chick who's eager to embrace the hard work it takes to live off the grid, can hold an intelligent conversation about obscure topics, and is cool with you smoking dope and not working for a living.
good luck with that.
Who's going to chop the wood?
And what about her career? Or should she suscribe to societal norms that say she should subjugate her pursuits to yours... | |
|
| Where are the decent women looking for long term at?
Posted: 7/3/2009 3:38:41 PM | Irish Eyes 43 on 7/3/2009 6 55 PM
This is my first time visiting the forums and this thread is very interesting. It's sad...with all the venues that exist for the younger generation to find "love", you'd think this is the last place they'd go. At my age, I have no interest in hanging out with a bunch of 20-somethings at your friendly neighborhood bar. I am, however, one of those people who is authentically looking for someone compatible. I've been on and off this site for the better part of six months and it's truly amazing some of the men who don't bother to read my profile yet contact me anyway. Some behaviors have no age limits, I'm afraid.
So, I echo your question... Where are those people of substance and integrity?
Maria
Well, let me first welcome you to Forumland, IrishEyes43. And from one New Yorker to another....how you doin'? Lol
Substance and integrity go into question every day on this great big marble we call our world. The good thing is, the sustained seem to always appear to us before we have to approach them. As for the integral, well, singer John Mayer says it best...."We keep on waiting, waiting on the world to change!"
On a side note...a fine figure of a woman you indeed are...but it's not just those Irish Eyes...it's that blessed that brings the men home.
Danz | |
|
| Where are the decent women looking for long term at?
Posted: 7/3/2009 3:39:18 PM | tbuddha, your in colo? me too! I should have known !! GO BRONCOS !!
The youmger ones are guided by oprah, and look up to Britney speers (Enough said)
The older ones are just now discovering ,all thats left in societys junkyard, are what they just unloaded.
Hang in there, soon the govt. will take care of your "emotional " needs as well !!   | |
|
| Where are the decent women looking for long term at?
Posted: 7/3/2009 3:48:04 PM |
Umm lemme rephrase that for you..."that they're in a long term relationship and aren't available for dating, but at the same time still searching for MR. RIGHT. Allow me to reiterate since I don't need anyone paraphrasing my statements...
Actually... the reason you can't find them is that they're in long term relationships and aren't available for dating...
I'm an articulate person and am able to convey my thoughts without anyone correcting me tyvm.
 | |
|
| Where are the decent women looking for long term at?
Posted: 7/3/2009 3:58:30 PM | You're either meeting the wrong women, or they're bored with you after awhile.
Also, most people who haven't been in some kind of long-term relationship don't really know what to expect, IMO, because most learn from experience. | |
|
| Where are the decent women looking for long term at?
Posted: 7/3/2009 4:00:06 PM | Well, thank you for that fine welcome, Danz! :) Certainly the best correspondence I've shared with anyone on POF! lol And how you doin' back!??!! lol
The forums just may be my answer to a stale dating life, thanks to you! lol Oh, and "it's that blessed" what???
Maria xo | |
|
| |
| Where are the decent women looking for long term at?
Posted: 7/3/2009 4:14:43 PM | Op speaking of superficial,,, is your shirtless photo an invitiation to peotry reading? Lol!
Hey man, ease up on the ladies. I think you can totally figure this out if your really wanted to. If what you are doing is not working, do something else. Come in at a differant angle.
It truly is a thinking man's game.
Cheers and have fun. | |
|
| |
| Where are the decent women looking for long term at?
Posted: 7/3/2009 4:24:49 PM | Personally, I think most women have no idea what a long term relationship means. Is that where we meet for lunch and I'm still interested in you come dessert?
Most women on here still list superficial things for interests and superficial qualities in men they are looking for (looks, height, dancing ability, etc..), and couldn't care less about whether a guy would be a good father or husband.
Female translation: Good looking children, tall children, coordinated children... Women are picking over the gene pool and you think it's superficial? Nah, you just don't see the method to the madness.
I've stopped even trying and have devoted myself to my business.
OMG - me too! ... actually I'm goofing off to type this, but hey - I'm the boss... | |
|
Home
login 
