| What's the right amount of times to call?
Posted: 7/4/2009 9:25:46 AM | Just a quick simple question.
After the first date or two, how ofteen should you be trying to call the woman to say hi, or to set up future dates? In my case, it seems like when I set up a date or a second date, things usually go well. The last time the woman kept telling me she liked me. I would only call her every 2 or 3 days because I didn't want to seem like I was suffocating her. That, and she said the last guy would call like 5 times a day, and she likes it when a guy doesn't call more than 2 or 3 times a week. But now she seems more distant and hasn't answered the last couple times I called. And in my book, after I make a third call with no answer, I move on, whether I like the woman or not.
So I'm just wondering, after a few dates with a guy, do you like him to call you everyday even if it's a quick hi, or do you like him to give you a day or two between calls? | |
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| What's the right amount of times to call?
Posted: 7/4/2009 9:58:58 AM | If I like him right away then him calling me every day will probably make me fall for him even more. If I'm unsure of the guy after date #1, then him calling every day will make me think he's a psycho. If I like him and he only calls me every few days, then I might think he's not that into me and possibly look elsewhere. I'm generalizing here. Every situation is different. Every one is different. If your normal self would be to call every day for a quick hi to someone that you like, then you should do that. When the girl complained about the guy that called her 5x a day....well, guess what? She just was not that into him!  | |
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| What's the right amount of times to call?
Posted: 7/4/2009 10:33:01 AM | In short, OP, there's no hard and fast answer to your question. If the woman likes you, she won't mind you calling at all. If she isn't sure, then calling more than once or twice a week is likely to scare her off, and if she likes you but you don't seem to care about her (which would be moot as far as your question goes), then she's going to put her attention elsewhere.
The problem with this logic (and I use the term loosely) is that you don't know which camp the woman is in, because she doesn't tell you. So you're left wondering, and either succeeding blindly (because she's into you) by calling every day, or potentially shooting yourself in the foot (because she isn't sure yet).
You know, it sounds like a conspiracy theory, but I swear a lot of women do this sort of thing on purpose. It gives them a sense of power they couldn't otherwise claim. | |
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| What's the right amount of times to call?
Posted: 7/4/2009 10:55:30 AM | | From experience if you feel that you keep having to make the calls/texts/emails she's probably not that into you. For me, its an absolute maximum of 2 calls/texts/emails which if un-responded I move on. | |
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| What's the right amount of times to call?
Posted: 7/4/2009 5:05:23 PM | There in no rules about it. Everybody's different.
If you feel like with this particular woman you should call more often and this is something you would like to do then call more often.
Yeah, five times a day is suffocating, but once or even twice a day is perfectly reasonalble. 2-3 times a week is not abnormal either. | |
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| What's the right amount of times to call?
Posted: 7/4/2009 10:00:19 PM | | About every other day. Every day might push things to fast, much less every other day, she mightthink you aren't interested. they don't have to be 3 hour converations, just the hi, how was your day, that shows you like and care for her. | |
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| What's the right amount of times to call?
Posted: 7/5/2009 12:44:06 AM | I have this system, the system of three. Three calls and we don't connect and I'm out. Three times you set up a date and cancel on me, and it's out of there. I like three.
So it's whatever works for you. But clearly, 5 times a day is too much. | |
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| What's the right amount of times to call?
Posted: 7/5/2009 5:17:40 AM | Once upon a time there were 3 bears.
One day the 3 bears were out walking in the forest and met a cute little blond girl named GoldyRox. GoldyRox thought the 3 bears were hawt, so she gave them her phone number.
When they got home the they decided to call GoldyRox.
The first bear called once and gave up, and GoldyRox quickly lost interest because cute little blond girls have a short attention span.
The second bear called and texted and texted and called continuous for days, and GoldyRox got a very needy psycho vibe from this bear, and never called him back.
The third bear called her and left a funny voicemail, GoldyRox called him back and they had wondrous phone sex, and lived happily ever after. | |
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| What's the right amount of times to call?
Posted: 7/5/2009 5:41:09 AM | If I like the guy and there was an attraction then a 'follow up call' the next day would be nice. If I didn't feel anything for the guy then I would prefer not to hear from him at all.
I'm pretty up front though and will usually tell a guy that a. I love it when he calls or b. Please don't call me again.
i | |
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| What's the right amount of times to call?
Posted: 7/5/2009 11:27:29 AM | | So did you get your answer? If they like you call, if they don't like you don't call, but it's up to you to figure out if they like you or not. I go for the everyother day thing, I just can't handle any more phone work than that. | |
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| What's the right amount of times to call?
Posted: 7/5/2009 2:27:29 PM | | If you've left messages the last times you called her (I would say two is appropriate) then the ball is in her court. If you don't hear back from her move on. Sorry, rejection sucks, we've all been there. | |
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