| Why do guys do this?
Posted: 7/4/2009 2:29:45 PM | Wandering Eyes........everytime I'm out with a guy, sitting there talking to each other....they're always looking at the other women around them. I feel like I'm just not attractive enough for them...this really bothers me. Don't guys know that it's rude to the woman they're with?
I just don't get it, they tell me that I'm beautiful and they like the way I look, but still stare at the other women.
I feel like I should bring it up...but don't know if I should. | |
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| Why do guys do this?
Posted: 7/4/2009 2:37:56 PM | You say "wandering eyes" but I'm not sure if you're talking about occasional glances, or if he looks at other girls so often that he may as well not even be there with you. Because there is a signficant difference.
In any case, just how interesting are you? You don't have crap in your profile, so I can't tell if you're just as concise in real life. | |
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| Why do guys do this?
Posted: 7/4/2009 2:42:51 PM | Would you rather he just sits there and stares at you like a cat for the whole date?
As for wandering eyes, I often do that when women start babbling on and on about nothing.
REMINDER: It's a date, we're not there to girl talk with you! | |
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| Why do guys do this?
Posted: 7/4/2009 2:45:14 PM | | It's not just occasional glances....It's watching them from the moment they enter the room to when they leave....like I'm not even there...and it's usually the women that show everything...no modesty at all | |
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| Why do guys do this?
Posted: 7/4/2009 2:47:03 PM | | Well then, obviously they're dumbasses and you should be happy to discover this now rather than later, ya know.. when you find out he's been cheating on you with some skank? | |
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| Why do guys do this?
Posted: 7/4/2009 2:51:41 PM | Just realize, men have eyes, men are visual creatures.
Don't start nagging guys be cause they have eyes and they are visual creatures. They are going to look, it is the way they are wired. Unless they are the kind of idiots who oogles and makes odd monkey noises, let it go, Sister. If he's a non-stop looker, you might want to let him go if it bothers you that much.
Rather than trying to change nature, realize they guy is with YOU, not someone else. He wants to be with you, he likes how you look, he thinks you are attractive.
Realize that you are attractive no mater who is looking at you, don't be insecure and start nagging. No guy likes someone who nags and doesn't have enough self esteem for the occasional peek at another woman.
And for the love of all things holy girl, you are attractive! Don't doubt yourself for a minute. | |
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776877
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Joined: 10/13/2007
Msg: 7 | |
| Why do guys do this?
Posted: 7/4/2009 2:58:50 PM | Always remember that HE is there with YOU, not the other women.
Also, a small tip may be to give him the seat where all he has a view of is you and the wall so there won't be any distractions. | |
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| Why do guys do this?
Posted: 7/4/2009 3:00:24 PM | That's a good idea...didn't think of that
And thanks to everyone for your input......i was just feeling a little self conscious.. | |
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| Why do guys do this?
Posted: 7/4/2009 3:00:41 PM | People watching isn't a crime. In fact, women do it too, looking at women, while their inner dialogue goes off the deep end....right?
Don't tell me you haven't done that yourself. Chuckling at other people who dress poorly?
...And sometimes people (with bad eyesight) think they're seeing a familiar face come forth too. | |
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| Why do guys do this?
Posted: 7/4/2009 3:02:30 PM | As Abbicci posted, men have eyes, men are visual creatures.
Some, are hyper-visual. It is what it is.......just looking.
Now, it'd be different if he whipped out his Sony digital camera and took
pictures for posterity while he was with you. Or his tongue flopped outta
his mouth and hit the floor whilst drooling and making strange noises don't
be so hyper-sensitive.
You are a pretty girl.
Put some confidence in your pocket and be sure you're never without it.
If this bothers you then that man might not be for you. | |
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| Why do guys do this?
Posted: 7/4/2009 3:03:26 PM | | Since you pointed that it's "women that show everything," I'm guessing it's a little bit of insecurity on your part. It's probably not as bad as you believe it is. It's like when you have a cold sore and think everyone is staring it. Maybe that's not the best analogy. You know what I mean. | |
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| Why do guys do this?
Posted: 7/4/2009 3:04:47 PM |
That's a good idea...didn't think of that
And thanks to everyone for your input......i was just feeling a little self conscious..
Also, if you're repeatedly going out with guys whose attention seem to wander while you're out on a date, you might want to start wondering what you're doing wrong. Because it's not coincidence when you go out with 5 guys and all 5 can't help but check out the T&A instead of paying attention to you. | |
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| Why do guys do this?
Posted: 7/4/2009 3:07:11 PM | You should bring it up.. they do it because they can.
The first time this happens..you should walk away from the table , shake your head and tell them that you are really disapointed with their behavior.
It probably won't happen again.... if it does... the fellow is a dog and doesn't deserve your time. | |
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| Why do guys do this?
Posted: 7/4/2009 3:56:08 PM | If you decide to bring it up ,play a little with it,"wow, you think she's brains &looks or just brains" be confident in who you are. Ye i know,there is no excuse for cutting ANY
person down for ANY reason,but perhaps this will show your date you mean business.
vin | |
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| Why do guys do this?
Posted: 7/4/2009 4:20:14 PM | I like baraboom's response as well as many others. I remember reading in an article once that a woman should ask the guy (of course, she should be pretty secure about yourself) so what is it about that person that grabs your attention - even if the woman isn't modest, it may be something specific that caught his attention and if he doesn't feel like he's being attacked, he may just tell you and might possible turn out not to be a bid deal and you get the bonus info of what catches his attention (could be as simple as the color she was wearing).
On a humorous note, I tend to be distracted by movement so if anyone is walking by and my proxmity I tend to glance to see what's going on. Unfortunately, this happened with a girlfriend of mine and someone came within my peripheral vision and when I looked up the person happened to be a rather attractive blonde waitress...of course, my thought was 'oh crap, she's not going to believe I had no idea it was an attractive woman until I looked up to see what was moving nearby'. :)
Hope that helps,
Mark | |
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rhodax
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Joined: 6/11/2009
Msg: 16 | |
| Why do guys do this?
Posted: 7/4/2009 5:02:10 PM | To you perhaps, sky. I think she's quite attractive.
To the main point:
Several studies have shown that looking at an attractive woman releases the same chemicals that a heroin injection would. Not the same amounts, obviously, but that which makes heroin addicting also makes looking at attractive women addicting.
Just like heroin addicts, there are differing levels of compulsion depending on the person but few men would be so compelled that they couldn't keep it from being obvious - if they wanted to.
So the answer is "Because we're compelled". But that doesn't excuse being a jerk about it. Tell him it bothers you and ask him to stop making it so obvious. | |
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| Why do guys do this?
Posted: 7/4/2009 5:06:59 PM | To me it is not that they look it is how they look... and at what point in the dating process we are at.
If I have been with the man for a year or more then the trust is established and I might say "Hey did you see her/him?" They might be good looking or just curious to me in some way.
If they are leering at the waitress on the first or second date then we are going no further...
Lets say we have been dating a few months and his eye is straying... I would give him a very blunt heads up on how I felt about it...
But I do know who I am and what I will tolerate.
~Charmed~ | |
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| Why do guys do this?
Posted: 7/4/2009 5:15:30 PM | I don't think blaming it on the girls for showing everything is the answer it's not their fault the guy is looking at them. Some woman can dress conservatively and still guys may notice.
If he is like staring at a person he is probably making both parties uncomfortable and if it's annoying you say something witty to snap him back to reality. | |
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Bluez
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Joined: 6/6/2009
Msg: 19 | |
| Why do guys do this?
Posted: 7/4/2009 5:22:40 PM | OP.. I've been out with someone in the past who made sure that my attention was on her, no matter who happened to be in the room. It's not that hard to do really... If you want to be the only thing your date sees, step up make sure it happens! You don't have to dress any differently than you already do... just engage him and take his attention away from everything else.
Bluez | |
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| Why do guys do this?
Posted: 7/4/2009 5:24:27 PM |
Don't guys know that it's rude to the woman they're with?
Only those with class. Don't tolerate this for a a minute. If the guy can't make you feel that you aren't the centre of attention, then he isn't very good at dating, he's poor relationship material and he's probably lousy in bed. | |
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