| Love Triangle - ever felt like there were 3 in your relationship?
Posted: 7/5/2009 3:42:01 AM | | Princess Diana said she always felt there was 3 people in her marriage. Have you ever experienced being in a relationship where you felt at times there was a visible/ invisible person who was lurking in the wings? Perhaps you were that person? Could you be in a relationship where you felt your loyalties were divided? | |
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| Love Triangle - ever felt like there were 3 in your relationship?
Posted: 7/5/2009 3:48:53 AM | I came home early from work once to find my ex girlfriend in bed with both
the postman and the milkman and never suspected anything although looking back on
it now I always wondered why they both looked so happy whilst doing their rounds.
No I could never be in a relationship again if I felt that my loyalties were divided. | |
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| Love Triangle - ever felt like there were 3 in your relationship?
Posted: 7/5/2009 3:55:34 AM | I can relate to this OP.
My last relationship was with a guy who was still very much entangled with his estranged then eventually, ex wife.
I saw them together on 2 occasions and there was still a frisson between them, even if it was antagonistic. He spent most of the time we were together obsessing and plotting his revenge on her. She was a huge presence in our relationship.
We split up a year ago, but he was still contacting me and telling friends of mine he loved me right up until last Christmas. I have since discovered that 3 months later he married someone else!
Sadly history seems to be repeating itself as she rang me the other week desperate for advice (Lord knows how she got my mobile no) as he was playing exactly the same game with her as he did with me. He'd done a runner after 3 months of marriage. She told me how he had talked about me all the time and how I was supposed to have been texting him since they got married ( a blatant lie!).
So, I do feel sorry for the girl. I think she was foolish to marry him so quickly and now she seems to be paying the price. It would appear that I'm now the 3rd person in their relationship and if he's still not over his ex wife, there are four. Poor girl, it must be really bloody crowded in her marriage... | |
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| Love Triangle - ever felt like there were 3 in your relationship?
Posted: 7/5/2009 4:20:55 AM | | Yes once upon a time there was me, a girlfriend and her ex husband, whom she had loved dearly and had effed her over big time. She spent six months in mourning moaning about it. Never again...... "Walk when they whinge about ex's" is a good creed me thinks. | |
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| Love Triangle - ever felt like there were 3 in your relationship?
Posted: 7/5/2009 4:25:59 AM | Yep, me him and his alcohol! But not quite in that order..alcohol was top of the list!(okay I know its not a person but it did affect a lot of our relationship)
It was like a weight lifted off my shoulders when I eventually told him i'd had enough..and I will never go down that road again!(not saying that I dont enjoy a good ol tipple myself..but living with someone whose alcohol comes before anything else was a nightmare!)
Lesson learnt!! | |
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| Love Triangle - ever felt like there were 3 in your relationship?
Posted: 7/5/2009 4:35:52 AM | There were definately 3 in my marriage!It wasn,t another person though it was my ex husbands workshop down the garden!He was down there every evening til like 2 in the morning!I got really fed up spending every evening on my own.I told him he should put a bed down there! Could def not be in a relationship with divided loyalties.It would be too stressful. | |
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| Love Triangle - ever felt like there were 3 in your relationship?
Posted: 7/5/2009 4:40:42 AM | Definately with you on that one namethatchoon, I won't ever get involved with anyone who even remotely resembles an alcoholic again!
I don't want to sound up myself, but I suppose recently I've been the 3rd party. Not through choice, but my ex husband went through a stage where he was obsessed with winding me up and causing problems for me. Although I was merely in contact with him to try and establish a father/son relationship with our little boy, he only seemed interested in me and what I was doing.
I even went as far as to tell his new wife that I'd be bothered if my new husband was still obsessing over his ex wife.
In the end, it was me that put an end to it by saying, if all he was bothered about was me, then he should not contact us again and go through court if he required access to his son. Funny that we've heard nothing from him since and this was at least 6 months ago! | |
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| Love Triangle - ever felt like there were 3 in your relationship?
Posted: 7/5/2009 4:45:12 AM | Onetime there were 3 of us in my relationship and I hated it as she often went to bed before me and got on the righthand side. I'd quite clearly told her several times that the right hand side of the bed was MINE.
I had to let her go in the end. | |
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| Love Triangle - ever felt like there were 3 in your relationship?
Posted: 7/5/2009 4:56:45 AM |
what are your thoughts on him me and his work no one else just work ?
This is obviously a problem for you Gilly, so my first question would be have you told him how you feel? I assume you're feeling second best, rejected, but does he know this?
If he does and he's not giving you the time you need, then you have to decide if you're happy with that and, if you're not, find someone who can give you what you need.
If he doesn't, he might just not realise. Remember men aren't exactly good at reading women's minds and sometimes need it said to them directly before they even realise there's a problem. If you haven't spoken to him already, you might be surprised when you do, cos he might not realise its affecting you and might actually want to make you feel better.
Basically, you don't know until you bring it up with him.
Good luck | |
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tm1971
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Joined: 5/22/2009
Msg: 14 | |
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HenXX
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Joined: 6/16/2009
Msg: 15 | |
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tm1971
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Joined: 5/22/2009
Msg: 16 | |
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| Love Triangle - ever felt like there were 3 in your relationship?
Posted: 7/5/2009 6:38:38 AM | | Nothing worse than being with someone who constantly compares you to an ex or says things like 'oh my ex would have done that a different way' or 'my ex used to make this meal all the time' ... definitely time to bale out and find someone who is not hung up on their ex. | |
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HenXX
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Joined: 6/16/2009
Msg: 18 | |
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| Love Triangle - ever felt like there were 3 in your relationship?
Posted: 7/5/2009 8:36:33 AM | One thing i will add, is i recently met someone whom i really like..Suppose we are seeing each other. Though its only happened once for 5 days..He lives in Dumfries and i Liverpool..
Anyway thing is, his best mate is a female..Whom once kissed, nothing more ..but both decided they did not want anything more..It was like kissing a sister he said..
This happened many moons ago, and i have nothing to worry about i think..
His ex's have been jealous..
the thing that worrys me , is if and when we progress. i won't have the same closeness..As you expect from a relationship..
Any ideas? | |
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73ste
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Joined: 6/2/2009
Msg: 21 | |
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