| i made a big mistake, and i cant fix it
Posted: 7/10/2009 11:39:05 AM | i met this beautifull girl, not in here..
we went on couple dates, movies, fireworks and a wedding.
couple days after i found out that she comes to this all of the time, pretty much 24/7
i became a bit worry about what type of girl she was, and i actually found out that i contacted her before on pof, but she didnt reply...
so i started asking too many questions, way too many, i knew i was pushing her away,,,
but i just couldnt stop.....it finally came to a point that she told me to leave her alone.
i knew it was gona get to that point, but i couldnt stop..
she told me some things, that didnt really made sence to me,
like she doesnt really care for people in here, but she is on this site 24/7 .
i wonder why did she spent all that time with me,, we had such a good time,, and i fu$@# it up,,, im never gona forget myself for this, never
and finaly i asked her is there was a way to fix this, but she said that "i dug a hole and now it too deep"
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| i made a big mistake, and i cant fix it
Posted: 7/10/2009 11:55:46 AM | Clingy and/or desperate are two of the hardest labels to overcome.
Frankly after only a couple of dates, I'd just move on.
But . . . If you really want to keep her, I just leave her alone for two to three weeks. No call, no texting, no visiting her profile, nothing.
Then send her an innocuous email, saying something line "heh, hope all is well with you. I was out with friends with weekend for dinner and thought about you. Hope you had a good weekend too." And then her take it from there.
You have to give this time for her to think you aren't a nut, and you are someone she'd like to spend time with.
But it's all up to her. | |
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| i made a big mistake, and i cant fix it
Posted: 7/10/2009 12:41:16 PM |
she is on this site 24/7 Don't think she ever thought you were the one, so don't sweat it. You had a gut feeling and went with it. You aren't a match. | |
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| i made a big mistake, and i cant fix it
Posted: 7/11/2009 4:26:08 AM | Luis, you need to find out what made you so aggressive and dogged in your pursuit of the answers while you knew you were pushing her away.
It sounds as if you would feel the same way with the next girl you like.
So while this one may be lost, your life won't be a series of dating train wrecks you can not stop yourself from having. | |
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| i made a big mistake, and i cant fix it
Posted: 7/11/2009 7:09:55 AM | | Trust me at times even "good" guys get the your great for awhile and then they leave you. If she was into you she would still be seeing you. Were you too direct, and if she is on 24/7 you had your answer... listen to your gut. Good Luck, the women here have a full nest to pick from and from what I see they are way to picky. | |
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| i made a big mistake, and i cant fix it
Posted: 7/11/2009 8:47:58 AM | silly boy, silly boy
first after a few dates you did not have the right to question her
second..have you thought about maybe she just has not logged out?
i play poker on line, sometimes its to slow , so i come on here to read the forums, so yah im here a lot,but not really talking to anyone | |
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| i made a big mistake, and i cant fix it
Posted: 7/11/2009 8:49:48 AM | | Don,t be so hard on yourself.You'l get over it.Suck it up and move on.Next time relax a little and don't Quiz her so much.Women are attracted to confidence and when you ask too many questions about certain things you sound needy and possessive. | |
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| i made a big mistake, and i cant fix it
Posted: 7/11/2009 8:57:12 AM | well saggy i actually though about taht, not logging out,,
but they she told me that something the system signs her in by itself, i dont think pof can do that? and when i found she was in here, i started just checking how oftem she comes, and she was constantly siging in and out,, at work , at home on her cell... | |
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| i made a big mistake, and i cant fix it
Posted: 7/11/2009 9:19:06 AM | Spifflog :
i dont know why i became like that "Clingy and/or desperate "
im not like that, but i never met someone like her, we had pretty much everything is comon ,,,,, and she is so beautifull....(thats just a bonus)
i know is too late,,,,, but im gona do what u said ,, it is a good idea,,, and if this cant ever be fixed , ill learn from it,, trust me i have learned from it..........
and im paying for it...........................i know i shouldnt be so hard on myself, but i know i made a big mistake | |
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| i made a big mistake, and i cant fix it
Posted: 7/11/2009 12:41:41 PM | Oh please. Stop freaking blaming yourself.
If she had any guts and was really into you she would tell you the truth- she is here reading the forums or talking to friends. End of story. Instead she flips it and makes you look all clingy and needy.
She could not assure you and didn't want too.
Stop blaming yourself. You had a feeling and your feeling was right about it.
The only thing you fucked up was getting stuck with someone who had no respect for you or a decent relationship with a guy who liked her. She chose to give you stories instead of being straight with you.
See her for what she is and stop focusing on your behavior. She instigated you to react.
Carry on sweets. | |
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| i made a big mistake, and i cant fix it
Posted: 7/11/2009 11:23:14 PM | She doesnt care for you at all. There ARE a lot of women in this world. Time will heal you will realize it just wasnt meant to be you loved her she didnt love you back . Black and white my dear. Ive been there. You will find someone else get over it go out and get laid !!! To get over someone get under someone cheer up . :) javascript:smilie(' ') | |
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| i made a big mistake, and i cant fix it
Posted: 7/12/2009 11:16:35 AM | well "i am hot"
i didnt love her, i just really really liked her, we were just pretty much gettin to know each other......
i know there are lots of women in this world, but im just wonder if ill ever find someone like her,,,
i know with time , this wound will heal
now about me going out and getting laid, i dont think is the think for me,,, i have tried it before and they were mistakes, cuase after instead of not thinking about that person, i started thinking even more ....
but thanks for the advise apreciate it :-) | |
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| i made a big mistake, and i cant fix it
Posted: 7/12/2009 2:32:51 PM | You both are in the wrong; when I'm dating someone I am not on a dating site. end of story. She was flirting and contacting guys; I wasnt' born yesterday.
You are insecure; you need to pick someone that is for you; sounds like things went way way too fast.
She's going to make you feel guilty like you caused this; but no way. Cheaters often try to make the other person feel guilty so that they can get even more freedom.
She wants no accountability; she's not a good person in my book and is doing things she shouldn 't be, end of story. This isn't going to end well.
You also have to gain more confidence. You are not ready to be in a relationship until you fix that. good luck, | |
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| i made a big mistake, and i cant fix it
Posted: 7/12/2009 4:49:36 PM | | I was married to a Hispanic lady, she says this is in the genes ! Obsessive Compulsive Behavior. I know, she was that way too ! Its a cultural thing, don't ask why but it is. Move on and hope she changes her mind ! | |
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| i made a big mistake, and i cant fix it
Posted: 7/13/2009 6:47:59 PM | | Note the name of the site: PLENTY OF FISH.... it's connotation is very clear: if one doesn't succeed, then just move on and try again because there's a limitless pool of people out there. In fact there seems to be more people on Plenty of Fish in many towns and cities than government census numbers could identify. | |
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| i made a big mistake, and i cant fix it
Posted: 7/13/2009 11:39:51 PM | Luis,
There are some good people on this site. I consider myself one of them. However, my heart isn't easily attracted to just any man. I'd like for you to know that I have made some friends on this site. Friends of the opposite gender from all over the world. I come to this site often, however, that doesn't necesarily mean that I'm involved in a "sexual" relationship with any of them for that matter.
Honestly, they're actually incredible people who really " are" strictly friends. They really make my day and put a smile on my face. Give me great advise and share some knowledge.
On the other hand, I really am here to truely find someone worth my time and someone who can really value me as a person; Not my sexual apperance.
You may have misunderstood and analyzed it a little too far. Don't be shallow, there's always explanations for everything..... if you don't buy the explanation, just move on. There's too many  . | |
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| i made a big mistake, and i cant fix it
Posted: 7/14/2009 12:32:18 AM | Dude...you asked the right questions and found out what you needed to know. I've known girls like this. I'm just like you. This guy once told me, and I was in the exact same situation you are with the same kind of woman, and he said, "You're fighting your instincts on this one." Sometimes women play games so well that we get caught up in their BS. Trust your own gut. It was right in the first place.
This is going to sound kind of like dog behavior, but basically if you had consummated this thing with her physically, she wouldn't be weilding this much power over you. TRUST ME. I just came off of a dry spell and although it was disappointing for me to hook up with someone (I didn't really enjoy it that much)...it made me realize it was no big deal, i.e. women weild no more power over me than I choose to give them.
Best thing to do, delete/block her info, think about someone else, move on. You'll feel better. | |
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| i made a big mistake, and i cant fix it
Posted: 7/14/2009 11:07:13 AM | | you were pushy and insistant......not good. your actions are a deal-breaker for her. you lost your chance, you MUST move on for the sake of your own sanity. | |
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| i made a big mistake, and i cant fix it
Posted: 7/14/2009 11:49:12 AM | | Who knows why??? Lots of people keep on fishing. That's their loss. You should just move on. there are lots of other women out there for you. | |
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