| In regards to emailing
Posted: 7/16/2009 5:25:56 AM | So Ladies i have a question about an issue that is bugging me.
When i email someone i am never crude or rude and i only message those in which i truly enjoy their profile and feel we could be a match.
My question is - Why do some women tend to just read the message and Neither delete or respond in anyway ... There is no "no thank you i have no interest" or no deleting of the message. This is very confusing, Should i send another email incase they are shy or just forget it ??
Thanks for your help in advance :) | |
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| In regards to emailing
Posted: 7/16/2009 5:48:44 AM | | Why do men not do thread searches. Seems every day, someone, (or multiple men) come up with this. Some of us get 20, 30, 50 e mails a day. I am not here to e mail every circus clown back, rude or not, if I am interested or not. It simply means NOT INTERESTED. Shy is not the case either. E mails, photos and profiles need to be pretty kick ass to get a response. There is nothing confusing about it. And if you keep e mailing (as some do) it will keep getting deleted and you may eventually get blocked for not being able to get a clue. If someone is "shy" to e mail, you think they will meet you? Bottom line; there is a lot to choose from. There are also a lot of time wasters and people full of shit. Looks, profiles, etc. Sometimes some people are just not interested. I refuse to thank men all day long. I have a job and bills to pay. Also if you do a thread search you will find most topics get beaten to death. This is one of them. What is so hard about figuring out people MAY NOT be interested??? If I e mailed someone and did not hear back..it is done. Next. Move forward. I used to be nice about it and say "no thanks". Then it turns into name calling and bashing by men who cannot handle rejection. No joke. These men that were so "hot" for us calling us names, etc. Another reason I no longer say "no thanks". | |
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| In regards to emailing
Posted: 7/16/2009 5:52:30 AM | This question is asked often, and it is a bit strange, I admit, but a lot of people on pof
do not respond if they have no interest, and use the no response tactic AS the response.
You can send another email, but they likely got the first one and are not interested.
Just keep emailing and focus on the ones who do return your emails. There is about
a 1-5% response rate from what I read--about the same as what you receive meeting
people IRL (interest).
You might consider running your profile and pics thru the profile review in the forums, and doing a thread search on the subject of "first emails" and "initial contact" to get some pointers on what to send out with the first email.
As you get more comfortable with your emails and responses, I would think that those odds would go up a bit.
All the best. | |
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| In regards to emailing
Posted: 7/16/2009 5:56:46 AM | | Unfortunately courtesy is a thing of the past. Some women just don't appreciate the effort a man's made in sending them an email. You sound a really nice person, so don't waste your time with women who are too ignorant to even say thanks but no thanks. | |
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| In regards to emailing
Posted: 7/16/2009 6:00:59 AM | I Totally understand if a women is not interested, Lets face it attraction is not a choice! If she is not interested and not willing to write a responce than delete it ! Thats fine ... But to not delete ??? Thats the confusing part !
Is it that they just like to see a full inbox ?
Am i on their maybe list ?
or is it just laziness ? | |
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| In regards to emailing
Posted: 7/16/2009 6:10:28 AM | | Some people simply do not delete. Are you stalking sent mail to see if someone deletes mail or not? That is creepy. I have had men e mail me 2, 3 times saying "well, you did not delete my mail, so are we meeting?". Friggen nut cases. Who cares if someone does not delete it. Some people do not clean their cars or wash dishes. If a woman wants to meet you she will proabably tell you. Good grief. Some people scare me on here. Gotta wonder how they function off line. Never mind...I don't want to know!! This is the kind of NUT BAG behavior that has resulted in me not meeting men off here again. People have issues. Then they turn into stalkers. No thanks. | |
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| In regards to emailing
Posted: 7/16/2009 6:14:55 AM | How come you sound so bitter ? I am not stalking them ? Nor do i keep sending emails, That is why in my question I ask whether i should ... Its a Curiosity!
As to the responce above regarding Common Courtesy ... Ya i think they stopped teaching that growing up ! | |
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| In regards to emailing
Posted: 7/16/2009 6:20:23 AM | Another reason why people get deleted is because of the whole copy and paste thing that some people got going on. Some people that have become aware of such things delete on sight.
Some people read and delete because telling them a simple 'I am not interested' doesn't work. They are intent in emailing you until you are pissed enough to actually email again with a response "Leave me alone".
Others sometimes email stupid shit like "Read my profile and email me if you think we have anything in common". WTF?
Some have no common sense when they email you and say stupid shit like "Hello, Mami, I think you are cute so call me at XXX-XXX-XXXX" Double WTF.
If half of the people took the time to actually read profiles and take them into consideration instead of ignoring what the profiles say (or if they are even read at all) then you would hold off on sending emails that would only get rejected.
@angelofthewest:
Has got nothing to do with being ignorant. Maybe that you have not come across the 'nukkaheads' who don't know anything about courtsey or you don't get any mail at all.
People complain about things that they know the answer to but can't accept because they are on this trip of "How can they reject ME". Courtesies are extended but when lines are crossed, people get exactly what they ask for. | |
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| In regards to emailing
Posted: 7/16/2009 6:35:59 AM | I have to go with the guy on this one (and not because he's my friend)...........
stop sending mixed signals. If i get a peice of mail, I either a) respond, or b) delete.
My response is not necessarily the most prompt in the world, but if you truly have no interest DELETE IT!!
And I dont think it's that ppl can't handle rejection, but that they are left wondering when it isn't an acceptance OR a rejection.
Women always accuse men of playing head games......... maybe here's one we should all stop playing!!! | |
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| In regards to emailing
Posted: 7/16/2009 7:14:34 AM | Extremely redundant thread, this will be deleted soon.
I have recently adopted the practice of sending a reply that says "No thank you." and then immediately blocking them.
Works for me. | |
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| In regards to emailing
Posted: 7/16/2009 7:18:34 AM | Do I really have to respond to men that have forgotten they have emailed me ?... they use the exact same email too... rather comical.
Why do I have to be polite when they are not?
~Charmed~ | |
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| In regards to emailing
Posted: 7/16/2009 7:31:28 AM |
Do I really have to respond to men that have forgotten they have emailed me ?... they use the exact same email too... rather comical.
How do you know they have forgotten to email you? do they send the same email twice?
Why do I have to be polite when they are not?
Because you shouldn't let others dictate your behavior.
As for this being the 1,000 the thread on this topic: Shouldn't POF pick up on this and provide a fix? Such as a reply that says "thanks I am not interested" and auto-blocks so the sender can't retaliate with a nasty email? | |
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| In regards to emailing
Posted: 7/16/2009 7:47:27 AM | In regards to the comment that users should delete instantly if not interested. I don't delete right away for a couple of different reasons.
The first is I'm real slow in romance in the beginning. Sometimes, I need to the time to think about it.
The second is sometimes I'm undecided. Again, with more time, I usually come to a decision. (Usually within a couple of days)
The third is I'm just sloppy about deleting. I'll clean out my inbox about once a week.
Regardless, I don't think I should have to monitor my inbox according to someone else's rules. I've been ignore before too. Sometimes it just happens.  | |
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| In regards to emailing
Posted: 7/16/2009 8:12:07 AM | I'm fairly new on this site so don't know all the nuisances. Suspect there are a lot of others too that don't do what others expect because they don't know the rules yet. I too have tried responding with a no interest statement to only get another reply or two back.
Anyway, I have a related question, what if you get a reply but its a weak one? Like, they answer your question or comment and leave no follow up question. Is that a signal, that they are being polite but are really not interested? | |
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| In regards to emailing
Posted: 7/16/2009 8:13:06 AM | Thank you jmo73 ! Thats an honest responce to the actual question asked :)
It was a curiostity nothing more :) | |
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| In regards to emailing
Posted: 7/16/2009 8:16:39 AM | This whole arguement about non responses is older then dirt. The only people that have a problem with it, are the ones who confuse real life dating with internet dating.
In real life dating, a woman may have to make a choice about guys who approach them, a couple times during the week. Some more, some less.
In internet dating it may be 20 to 30 per day.
These ladies did not sign up on pof to improve their rejection letter writing techniques. The sooner guys get that through their thick frickin skulls, the more time they will have to devote to actually making this site work for them. | |
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| In regards to emailing
Posted: 7/16/2009 8:21:47 AM | @~charmed~:
You, too? What is also funny is when they ask you in the first email what you are looking for so that they are not wasting their time. . You tell them to go back and read the whole profile and then there is the answer. They don't send anything else for a while and they come back later on asking you another question about you dating or they cut and paste the same shyt they sent you the first time. It gets pretty pathetic when people recycle their own emails because they are too lazy to type one out. | |
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| In regards to emailing
Posted: 7/16/2009 9:32:26 AM |
How do you know they have forgotten to email you? do they send the same email twice?
As I said they do send the exact same email... I know they have forgoten they have emailed me in the past because I recognize them... I have a few that have emailed me the same stuff 4 and 5 times. I have even pointed this out to them.
Because you shouldn't let others dictate your behavior.
I just don't think that repete cut and paste emails deserve a response. Others don't dictate my behavior... I don't feel the need to reply to rudeness.
Sassy... ya know what bothers me most is that it makes me feel like I am part of their quota... if I resopnd great if not they could care less. Just part of their numbers game. You know send out 100 emails get 5 responses?
~Charmed~
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| In regards to emailing
Posted: 7/16/2009 12:04:43 PM | I personally don't reply to someone that I am not interested in because I don't want to hurt their feelings. I sometimes try to write back the reason why and put it in a delicate way. I would say "sorry, you are too far away" etc., but it is a difficult thing.
My best advice is to not take it personal and move along. I am sure there is someone out there for everyone.
Good luck! | |
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| In regards to emailing
Posted: 7/16/2009 12:09:25 PM | | Honesty would go a long way in this world. Instead of leaving it in the inbox where a person can see 'unread' just delete it. That gives someone hope for a response. So leaving a message in the inbox can be a form of torture for some people. | |
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