| Worrisome tendency in Success Stories
Posted: 7/25/2009 2:56:46 AM | By accident, I clicked on the Success Stories, and after browsing through a few pages I noticed that there are precious few happy endings in 2009.
Total number of pages – 195, with 5 stories a page = 975 reported success stories between 2006 and now. In other words - over 300 happy couples per year.
Page 1 – One wedding in May 2009. Page 6 - one wedding Feb 2009, for next 20 pages couldn’t find any more 2009 dates, but found two references to 2010 ?
A question begs to be asked – are the successful outcomes in dating world on a declining trend or is there simply a fatique in reporting the happy endings? | |
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| Worrisome tendency in Success Stories
Posted: 7/25/2009 4:37:42 AM |
A question begs to be asked – are the successful outcomes in dating world on a declining trend or is there simply a fatique in reporting the happy endings?
I think less people are tying the old knot these days. The future of marriages in Quebec will most likely become 5 year renewable contracts..
thecatsmeoww | |
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| Worrisome tendency in Success Stories
Posted: 7/25/2009 4:53:14 AM | Perhaps the definition of "success" has shifted from "marriage" to "happy".
Sometimes I think a lot of this is a moving target. We think we want something and when we get it, "nah, that's not it" and we change our minds. Too many choices, the grass is always greener, whatever. So back we go... | |
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| Worrisome tendency in Success Stories
Posted: 7/25/2009 6:06:38 AM | This topic reminds me how few people have actually experienced a good marriage - how many judge all future relationships by the relationships that didn't work in the past.
Many people think they are so positive, yet are unable to believe it is possible to find a happily ever after love.
The people in datingland who have had the good marriages hopefully realize how blessed they have been. Hopefully they realize what gave them a good marriage, and won't get involve with anything less than good relationship material. | |
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| Worrisome tendency in Success Stories
Posted: 7/25/2009 6:09:08 AM | Perhaps some couples do get together, and just never bother to come back online; so, how many marriages/success stories out there are not even accounted for? But, that is interesting, nevertheless ...
Renewable contracts ... not such a bad idea, is it? | |
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| Worrisome tendency in Success Stories
Posted: 7/25/2009 6:45:40 AM |
A question begs to be asked – are the successful outcomes in dating world on a declining trend or is there simply a fatique in reporting the happy endings?
Success stories, humm, I don't read these sites your talking about but imo, when your
very happy with your s/o then often, that does make the news much.lol
Those who are content need not "blow their own horn" to the public masses unless validation or self insurance is lacking.
Just read the fora and this subject will come up of those who say their are very happy but are still in question trying to convince themselves and us I'm guessing, and then there are those who say they are not happy, and here look for help and answers with is understandable.
As we age, imo the quality time you spend and think with and about your s/o,
is time well spent.
and like that old blue song," happy is thee,who got their own"... | |
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| Worrisome tendency in Success Stories
Posted: 7/25/2009 7:33:03 AM | Those who are content need not "blow their own horn" to the public masses unless validation or self insurance is lacking.
Very astute observation!
There used to be a couple of regular forum posters who claimed they'd met the "love of their life". They would flit from thread to thread in the over 45's, expounding how wonderful their "fish and new fish life", was. Often, they would disparage, those of us, who've been here for awhile. Insinuations we're made that we must be unworthy, inadequate, inferior, defective, poor saps. One, even went on to say........" Only the "good" ones get snatched up quickly!"
I called him on "that one", posted my picture, ........ and subsequently he deleted his profile and left the forums.
Yes Tink ( if you're reading this) I am a powerful woman!!!!! Hear me roar!.
Anyone, who has successfully met their kindred soul, needn't shout it from the rooftops, while dissing others who haven't YET!
Yes, the publishing of success stories, can offer some of us......hope. On the other hand, reading them, can also cause a certain amount of...... frustration. I tend not to read them. | |
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| Worrisome tendency in Success Stories
Posted: 7/25/2009 8:04:55 AM | Many interesting points were raised in the responding comments.
Cat
The idea of 5-year renewable contracts is interesting, but that may explain this phenomenon only partially, since most of the entries in the Success Stories are not necessarily "weddings", but just matches - incl. "dating since ....", "engaged", etc ....
Just Jim:
Success stories, humm, I don't read these sites your talking about It’s not another website, it’’s the top menu option on POF screen (to the right of FORUMS)
Phoebe
Anyone, who has successfully met their kindred soul, needn't shout it from the rooftops while dissing others who haven't YET!
Yes, the publishing of success stories can offer some of us hope. On the other hand, reading them can also cause a certain amount of frustration.
Yes, I agree, we don’t hear from the many happy souls who found someone and couldn’t get quick enough away from this site.
But, I was not talking about stories, I was looking only on the reported stats (relative numbers). Two 2009 entries in 6 ½ months against several hundreds of 2006 entries. That is very dramatic decrease. Let’s hope that it is mainly to the fatique of reporting.
And to your other point, I never get frustrated from reading happy and positive stories. If anything frustrates me, it would be the empty, negative, self-serving posts which extol how happy some of the permanently single posters are.
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| Worrisome tendency in Success Stories
Posted: 7/25/2009 8:11:29 AM |
Look at the couples! Who else would want them, but someone on POF?
that is one of the shallowest, stupidest things i've seen someone post here in a while.
YOU are on PoF, lady! who else would want YOU?
and what does someone's looks have to do with it???? as the saying goes, beauty is in the eye of the beholder.
every time i turn around, there are threads here bashing people for being so shallow as to choose who they want to even potentially meet based on looks, never did i think i'd see someone bash people for being happy together no matter how they look!
*sheesh*
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| Worrisome tendency in Success Stories
Posted: 7/25/2009 8:26:19 AM | hereIgoagain2009: Don't you find those success stories scarey. Look at the couples! Who else would want them, but someone on POF?
One look at your profile and I understand why you're so miserable.
You haven't "had any luck" therefore those who have done well here are fair game for insults...because that makes you feel better in an odd, dysfunctional sort of way.
I get it.
P.S. Exposing 90% of your right breast isn't going to get you where you want to go either, unless you're looking to get sexually assaulted in the back of some dude's car following your first date. | |
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| Worrisome tendency in Success Stories
Posted: 7/25/2009 8:31:07 AM |
Yes, I agree, we don’t hear from the many happy souls who found someone and couldn’t get quick enough away from this site.
I agree I would be one to do a quick vanishing act if that day was to come.. I have to wonder at times why people who are coupled decide to remain? I figure I would be playing with my S/O between grooming cats and not writing on a message board..
thecatsmeoww | |
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| Worrisome tendency in Success Stories
Posted: 7/25/2009 8:37:02 AM | | Get a life Idoc. Your picture isn't even worth looking at. Tell me honestly, you don't look at the success stories and think REDNECK, Povich and Springer material? If you don't there is something seriously wrong with you. | |
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| Worrisome tendency in Success Stories
Posted: 7/25/2009 8:39:42 AM | Phoebe48 wrote:
Yes Tink ( if you're reading this) I am a powerful woman!!!!! Hear me roar!.
Yup, I’m reading this and I concur. Actually, I made mention of your “powers” yesterday in the Survival skills thread!
Tryagan wrote:
And to your other point, I never get frustrated from reading happy and positive stories. If anything frustrates me, it would be the empty, self-serving posts which extol how happy some of the permanently single posters are.
I too am happy when I read about happy and positive stories. In fact, there are times in these fora when we have all been witness to the "mating dance" being played out amongst posters.
Tryagan, as a single person who seems to be happy with my present marital status and one who will probably permanently remain single, I’m sorry if my posts frustrate you but I choose to bring an upbeat, happy and positive attitude to these forums. | |
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| Worrisome tendency in Success Stories
Posted: 7/25/2009 8:47:16 AM | Tink - Msg 16
as a single person who seems to be happy with my present marital status and one who will probably permanently remain single, I’m sorry if my posts frustrate you but I choose to bring an upbeat, happy and positive attitude to these forums.
Dearest Tink - you never frustrate me. I think, you are one of the kindest, upbeat, most considerate persons in this universe. Keep on posting! | |
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| Worrisome tendency in Success Stories
Posted: 7/25/2009 8:52:07 AM | I was just at a party last nite, hosted by a couple that met on POF. If memory serves me, they have been together for 3 years? They are engaged with marriage planned in the new year. I also know of many others who have met up here and married. Would seem I am one of the last of the old crowd, and heck, I don't have myself a feller! That's ok though...I am waiting for Mr. Deac to decide to trade in his american citizenship and become a cannuck! OMG, he is so gonna kill me for that one! | |
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| Worrisome tendency in Success Stories
Posted: 7/25/2009 8:53:52 AM | | There's a lot of folks that are humble about their success. There is no need to boast. There are those who also like their privacy. Add in some skepticism, and other factors as to why the numbers are the way they are. While we should be happy about the success of others, we should take a look inward and ensure that we are living our lives as successfully/good as we can each day! | |
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| Worrisome tendency in Success Stories
Posted: 7/25/2009 9:00:40 AM |
Anyone, who has successfully met their kindred soul, needn't shout it from the rooftops, while dissing others who haven't YET!
Yes p48 that and their insinuations gets a bit old....I'll just say,there's still hope for them too.
It’s not another website, it’’s the top menu option on POF screen (to the right of FORUMS)
thanks op as I forgot that here. I did read some where that dating online the success rate is around 10 %,that being said, if true one would have to hone their skills and especially their picker in what is out there.
Like that beer commercial, "Choose wisely my friend"! | |
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| Worrisome tendency in Success Stories
Posted: 7/25/2009 9:13:17 AM | Get a life Idoc. Your picture isn't even worth looking at. Tell me honestly, you don't look at the success stories and think REDNECK, Povich and Springer material? If you don't there is something seriously wrong with you.
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The real world is probably where you belong. The tearing down of others to lift yourself up is an "old story" and easily seen through...but can't say always happy. Well half my family is REDNECK and the other half ARISTOCRATIC.... Sheeeite....where does that leave me...oh I know...in the proverbial rotating fishtank! Always nice to know you belong somewhere instead of out there. Idoc...seems like you have found your happy place...Congrat's! | |
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| Worrisome tendency in Success Stories
Posted: 7/25/2009 10:17:13 AM | Could be people putting off their weddings due to financial reasons--the economy is tight.
Or people simply living together in unwedded bliss-! For moral reasons, they or this site chose not to post them as "success stories", even though such a relationship might be considered very successful by the couple involved-! | |
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| Worrisome tendency in Success Stories
Posted: 7/25/2009 11:34:50 AM | As I recall, Markus started the Success Stories section in early 2007. He was pushing it a bit, sending emails to resigned accounts asking how they were doing, and making it easy to report.
I haven't seen it updated in months and months.
I 'spect the rate hasn't changed that much, just that he's not pushing the reporting so much.
As for *anyone* calling or thinking other peeps are losers? Sad.
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But, he's interested in someone else, at the moment.
and continue to be part of the statistics that the Op is referring to.........
