| How is it possible
Posted: 7/26/2009 8:04:23 PM | | I cant help but notice join dates on this site. how is it possible that many women and men have been here for many years some as much as 3 or 4 years and you are still looking for a nice guy or a nice girl depending on what you are looking for. is the picking field really that bad? are you all just to picky? or are you all here to kill time? As for me if I see a join date that goes back a few years I dont even bother I just figure she has issues with men. what say you? | |
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| How is it possible
Posted: 7/26/2009 8:10:49 PM | | I disagree. They may have had their profile hidden for months because they met someone but it didn't work out longterm, who knows? I dont judge by that. We're all looking for someone we're compatible with, no matter how long the search...Sure I can be in a relationship with someone , anyone who happens to fancy me, tomorrow for the sake of being in a relationship - but do I want that? no. Is it fair to that person? no... | |
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| How is it possible
Posted: 7/26/2009 8:11:33 PM | Read profiles.
Some people say they were gone for a while and came back. Some people say they're here for the forums. Some people say they found somebody but stay here to keep in touch with friends they made while they were looking.
This is a community. People don't have to flee as soon as they hook up. | |
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| How is it possible
Posted: 7/26/2009 8:11:34 PM | | I'm sure there are some who've met nice men/women and have hidden their profiles. Then it didn't work out. They came back on. Some are just here to see how many people they can sleep with. Some just here for the forums. Join date doesn't mean much | |
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| How is it possible
Posted: 7/26/2009 8:14:02 PM | | I understand that to a point. but we are talking years. this goes for men as well as women, I just prefer to ask here. at your age and my age does it really take months to realize that person is not compatable? | |
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| How is it possible
Posted: 7/26/2009 8:25:24 PM | Lets do the math...
You continuously pick the wrong type of person your whole life.
Plus
The internet makes it faster to pick someone.
=============================================
You pick the wrong type of person faster than you ever have before.
If you got a bad picker, the internet will not be your savior, try getting your head removed from your ass. | |
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| How is it possible
Posted: 7/26/2009 8:27:18 PM | | You don't seem to understand at all. I've been part of quite a few different online communities for years before I moved on/the closed down. Enjoying a community has nothing to do with being unable to find someone. | |
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| How is it possible
Posted: 7/26/2009 8:27:22 PM | | braaadddddddddddd, great insite, you have the best answer so far, good job, i knew i could count on you. | |
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| How is it possible
Posted: 7/26/2009 8:29:17 PM | | ben you are 22 go to your room and no tv for two weeks young man. this is adult time. | |
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| How is it possible
Posted: 7/26/2009 8:30:03 PM | The joins dates can be deceiving on some I suppose.
You never know that particular person's reason, therefore I don't put all
that much thought to that aspect. You never know who you might overlook.
As for me, I've been here about a year and a half.
Only a little over 3 months have I used it for dating per se.
That would be the first three months I'm talking about.
Last May I decided to put the house up for sale and relocate 900 miles away.
I couldn't put the house up for sale until this April (2009) and I have sold it
and will relocate next month.
So, I didn't see much use in trying to find someone around here and nobody
I've run into does long distance. So, I've just been biding my time hanging
out on the forums.
Edit: Also, there's lots of people who delete their profiles and re-enter with the
new latest join date. I've seen that MANY times. | |
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| How is it possible
Posted: 7/26/2009 8:33:56 PM | You never know who you might overlook.
exactly my point, its not over looking its being smart, if a women cant find a nice guy after 3 years and a few thousand emails it tells me she has issues with picking men. so why would I want a women with a bad picker? | |
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| How is it possible
Posted: 7/26/2009 8:41:41 PM | I couldn't care less how long I'm here. I am not on here to find Mr. Right.
I know my registration date is deceiving. I actually registered in September of last year, when I had my first profile.
I've been on POF, and the forums for almost a year now. | |
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| How is it possible
Posted: 7/26/2009 8:45:57 PM | I have been on the same dating site going on nine years now. (Not POF, been on here a couple times off and on.) This "alternate" site is geared for a specific lifestyle. One where people HAVE to be very picky... or at least they should be. I met several nice men off there. Two of whom are very dear friends now. Even met my ex on there. I don't consider the site itself as a failure for myself. I have learned a lot about the lifestyle and what other people consider it to be. I stay on there for the forums, blogging option, and other various features. Not really looking on there for a loving/lasting relationship anymore though.
I guess if I saw someone's been here a while... I'd check their forum posting history... see if they are only on for the forums before I made a judgment about their pickers :P
P.S. And yes... some of us really ARE that picky. We are looking for something that WE KNOW is a bit more specific than the site may be able to produce. We understand it may take a while. Until then... there is the forums to keep us entertained. | |
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| How is it possible
Posted: 7/26/2009 8:54:04 PM | Yes I have been on this site a long time. Do I want to be? of course not. I've done online dating off and on for the last six years. Various sites. I actually never dated til I got online. i was pretty much socially inept and too shy to meet people in person. I'm better to some extent. But this one is free, so I"ve stuck with this one and ditched all the others. Same people on all of them pretty much. Not much difference at all.
Are pickens slim, You betcha. And slimmer as you get older. I can't explain why. I wish someone would explain it to me. Am I picky? I have preferences because I know what works and what doesn't work for me. So over the years I've learned things, and base my preferences on that.
Sometimes I really do get lonely and wish i had someone to share good times with. But it seems like everytime I start to like someone and they do some stupid crazy crap, and then here comes the drama...i think ok well maybe single is not so bad.
But I am finding it hard to have a conversation with an over 40 yr old guy on this site who won't bring up sex right off the bat and want to know every intimate detail of my sex life...and what have you. one guy who was 47 his IM nickname was ''iluvbigtits'' and as soon as i saw that i just said the conversation is over before it begins.
I'm sure us old timers could write a book and share with you some of our crazy experiences. I know I sometimes swap stories with my fellow POFers and we're just amazed at what we deal with. | |
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| How is it possible
Posted: 7/26/2009 8:55:58 PM | And no that doesn't make me a bad picker either. I do hide my profile or put ''not single/not looking'' if i am dating someone so the start date is decieving. Plus i have been listed under various names because in my early days i got banned quite a bit.
Considering I've only had three dates from this site this year...doesn't make me a bad picker...makes the pickings that bad. | |
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| How is it possible
Posted: 7/26/2009 9:02:30 PM | | I do understand their are alot of losers for men. but not all men are losers and jerks, but is it not you who are picking these bumbs? you cant tell me all men are bad at our age. I am also in my early 40s and looking for a women. just getting sex is the last thing on my mind I much rather have the whole package.. so there fore I have no other choice then to say if they are here for years, its them and the way they pick, the whole world cant be wrong. | |
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| How is it possible
Posted: 7/26/2009 9:12:30 PM | Again I've been doing this off and on for six years. At one point I said let me just go out with anyone and everyone...various types, to make sure i'm not overlooking anyone or anything....
and i had a lot of boring first dates. and the guys could sense it....they were miserable i was miserable.
I've dated all the guys I say i won't date now....I've been there, done that and tried a sampling of everything.
But why should i pick men i'm not attracted to? Why should i have to be with a smoker???
And if you want me to lay some of experiences with over 40 men on you I can. I have a friend on here who is 42 and he told me his friends don't want relationships. They've been through the ringer withthe divorce and the child support and are done with the drama. They don't want more of it. Another guy's words of wisdom were ''we have to be fuc king you for at least three months before we ''might'' fall in love with you'' and he's 43.
My town too comes into play as most of the men here are very conservative, and many have the redneck mentality. I'm so far from that (although yes i tried to date a redneck and make that work). I have thought about moving even.
I'm not doing a whole lot of picking these days. I usually can't get past the IM stage with most of the guys who email me or vice versa. My ex bro in law said he wsa getting laid left and right after he joines, and he had women sending him nude photos.
I just can't compete with that. Most men will take the easy route every time. | |
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| How is it possible
Posted: 7/26/2009 9:14:41 PM | Oh and the long term relationships i've had in the last six years were all with men I met ''offline'' except maybe one...i dated a few others but it didn't get too serious.
YOu know I could have married that Morroccan so he could get his green card and then i would have been off the site a long time ago. LOL> | |
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| How is it possible
Posted: 7/26/2009 9:18:13 PM | | I WILL admit... this past summer... I went out with a guy who reminded me way too much of my ex. Which made me realize that I have been dating the same man since Jr High school. Not exactly the "same" man... but same personality... different faces. I never really cared for how these men treated me. So, pretty much, last summer (before I'd returned to POF)... I did an over hall of what *I* really was looking for. Have had a lot fewer dates since I narrowed things down... but... I haven't dated anyone like my ex since! | |
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| How is it possible
Posted: 7/26/2009 9:20:53 PM | | Well its not just the men, early last week i went to meet a women for coffee and just after 2 hours she asked me to go over to her place. and me being me i said no thanks, i knew she would be an easy pick but who wants easy? not me. all the dates and picking you say you do, and they are all bad? if a women has been here for years its her not the guys, either way you do the picking, and its impossible to have a million men online and you find all the jerks. all you are telliing me is you are going to be here another 3 years and still blaming men. | |
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| How is it possible
Posted: 7/26/2009 9:28:05 PM |
ben you are 22 go to your room and no tv for two weeks young man. this is adult time.
Maybe when you stop talking like a seven year old, people might somewhat respect what you have to say.  | |
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| How is it possible
Posted: 7/26/2009 9:30:43 PM | | thats it 4 weeks no tv for you. now go play in traffic | |
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