| Why aren't other races giving me messages ?
Posted: 8/5/2009 8:12:50 PM | | I'm a African American woman who is open to all races, styles, background. But after being on this website for alil while I'm starting to feel as if I'm the only few who willing to date outside their race. I only had maybe 2 men who isnt African -American who reply to me. I get messages from alot of people from my own race but nothing more after that. I just wanna know what I have to change on my profile or do to make my profile more approachable. Men,tell me what you look on a profile that make that woman interesting to you.. Thanks in advance.. bye Loves, Ashley | |
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| Why aren't other races giving me messages ?
Posted: 8/5/2009 8:14:49 PM | You being open to other races doesn't necesarily mean that other people who happen to chance upon your profile feel the same way.
There is an interracial dating website ad that pop up every now and then, you might wanna look into that. | |
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| Why aren't other races giving me messages ?
Posted: 8/5/2009 8:24:15 PM | It might be your area. Maybe people local to you tend to not share the same openess that you do. It might just be the type of guy you are trying to contact and the reason they might not reply to you may have nothing to do with race at all. It might be from some other factor.
But fact is that most people tend to prefer to date within their own respective race anyway. It has nothing to do with racism. Just that people with their cultures and the people involved in them and that's what they are familiar with and who they tend to stick with.
Of course there are exceptions. I've never dated a black woman before but I have seen black women who are attractive.
You are pretty cute youself as it is. So don't get down on yourself too hard. Maybe just give it a little more time. If you want to date outside your race a inter-racial dating site might be more suitable to you. | |
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| Why aren't other races giving me messages ?
Posted: 8/5/2009 8:50:57 PM | But fact is that most people tend to prefer to date within their own respective race anyway. It has nothing to do with racism. Just that people with their cultures and the people involved in them and that's what they are familiar with and who they tend to stick with.
It is inherently racist to exclude other races because of their differences..whether it be cultural or whatever. It's an insular racism you refer to. That's what I call it. Or reverse racism. Seeking the 'positives' within your own race does not make it any less racist than rejecting other races due to, for example, negative stereotyping. The former is just more acceptable.
Of course there are exceptions. I've never dated a black woman before but I have seen black women who are attractive.
You are pretty cute youself as it is. So don't get down on yourself too hard. Maybe just give it a little more time. If you want to date outside your race a inter-racial dating site might be more suitable to you
Sounds like you think an attractive black woman is an exception. She shouldn't need to be referred to an inter-racial dating site "if she wants to date outside her race". It's about other people's attitudes.
I used to play sports, but decided to give up a scholarship for softball to culinary arts..Yep I can make one hell of a meal.
By the way OP, from your post and your profile you sound bloody great! I'm into food so this one made an impression ^^^ (but I'm a girl lol). As the guy above said, you have the looks too. So I'm confounded. Noticed either of the previous two posters addressed your profile either and based their answers on race.
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| Why aren't other races giving me messages ?
Posted: 8/5/2009 9:02:01 PM |
But fact is that most people tend to prefer to date within their own respective race anyway. It has nothing to do with racism. Just that people with their cultures and the people involved in them and that's what they are familiar with and who they tend to stick with.
It is inherently racist to exclude other races because of their differences..whether it be cultural or whatever. It's an insular racism you refer to. That's what I call it. Or reverse racism. Seeking the 'positives' within your own race does not make it any less racist than rejecting other races due to, for example, negative stereotyping. The former is just more acceptable.
Of course there are exceptions. I've never dated a black woman before but I have seen black women who are attractive.
You are pretty cute youself as it is. So don't get down on yourself too hard. Maybe just give it a little more time. If you want to date outside your race a inter-racial dating site might be more suitable to you
Sounds like you think an attractive black woman is an exception. She shouldn't need to be referred to an inter-racial dating site "if she wants to date outside her race". It's about other people's attitudes.
O.m.g. Please stfu.
If anyone looks hard enough they can find racism in anything. Even innocent comments.
Seriously - just can it.
Preferences are preferences. I date all races - and I have met women of a different race who do not like white guys. So what? That does not make them racist. It makes them a woman who is not interested in white men.
Not being attracted to a certain race can be just like... not being attracted to fat chicks, or men with a lazy eye. Or bad teeth.
I'm not as attracted to black women or blonde white girls. So I've only ever dated one black woman and one blonde. They were uniquely attractive to me. Trying to staple racism on everything - especially *nice* comments made by the poster above is the mark of a racist, imo.
Seriously. The OP was not talking about racism. So why are others bringing it up?
Whew.... ok. Now I will answer your question, OP. In my experience, men don't like to get rejected any more than women do. So there are two answers to your question. Either these men you want messages from don't find you attractive, or they're afraid you will not be interested in them.
You can't help the first issue - but you an help the second.... by emailing them first.
Seriously. If you are not getting the emails you want - then be proactive. That way if you don't get an email back, you know it's the first issue and not the latter.
-8sf8 | |
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| Why aren't other races giving me messages ?
Posted: 8/5/2009 9:07:48 PM |
It is inherently racist to exclude other races because of their differences..whether it be cultural or whatever. It's an insular racism you refer to. That's what I call it. Or reverse racism. Seeking the 'positives' within your own race does not make it any less racist than rejecting other races due to, for example, negative stereotyping. The former is just more acceptable.
Ignorant.
This is the biggest load of garbage I've seen in a while. Do you really believe this nonsense you're spewing?
OP, I'm open to dating supermodels, but they're not knocking down my door. Why don't you take the initiative and send out some emails? | |
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SJS37
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Joined: 7/21/2009
Msg: 9 | |
| Why aren't other races giving me messages ?
Posted: 8/5/2009 9:12:16 PM | | Generally I stick to my own race or hispanic. If you messaged me, I would give you a chance though. It's just my preferrence so if I do want to message someone she would at least look European. I think a lot of black and Asian and Indian women are gorgeous but I just don't feel like we would have a lot in common. | |
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| Why aren't other races giving me messages ?
Posted: 8/5/2009 9:13:51 PM | I think OP you should be sending out emails also..
The other thing you might do is put a disclaimer in your profile somewhere. Also I agree go to profile reviews.
Good luck happy  | |
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| Why aren't other races giving me messages ?
Posted: 8/5/2009 9:26:12 PM | MD
You need to contact anybody you wish. Most guys will stay close to what they know. If you brake the ice you will get some good emails back.
Now if I was close to NC and 21..... | |
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| Why aren't other races giving me messages ?
Posted: 8/5/2009 9:37:06 PM | Don't know why. You are a beautiful American. I guess I'm just color blind. I just see American. I guess that's the most important thing. However, go to profile review and ask for some pointers. There are a lot of good folks over there with some great advice on how to market yourself in the on-line dating world.
Good luck | |
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| Why aren't other races giving me messages ?
Posted: 8/5/2009 9:39:53 PM | | I agree that you should take the initiative and send out some emails. If I just sat around and waited for a guy to initiate - whether in the "real world" or online, I'd still be a virgin! | |
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| Why aren't other races giving me messages ?
Posted: 8/5/2009 9:50:30 PM | A few emotional ranters have decided to pipe up..took 'em a while but they showed up all huffy and on the attack, how charming - small-minded control freaks that haven't grasped the concept that this is PUBLIC Forum where all views are welcome, contrary to theirs or not.
Any distaste for (a) particular feature/s whether it pertains to a particular race or is physical or otherwise, is discrimination of some sort. If it's due to physical and/or underlying racial features and/or pre-conceived views of that race where the nett effect is to disregard them, it's racist. Calling it a preference makes them feel better while hiding behind their walls of ignorance/stupidity. Or they're just too blindly wrapped up in pursuit of their own interests to see it. | |
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| Why aren't other races giving me messages ?
Posted: 8/5/2009 9:51:54 PM | ^^ Didn't I tell you to hush? You should take the advice.
There are not only a few emotional posters who disagree with you. Everyone who has posted after you think you're a tool.
Go away. | |
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| Why aren't other races giving me messages ?
Posted: 8/5/2009 9:57:19 PM | | Thats it I had enough I am calling Al Sharpton and jesse jackson. I would call micheal jackson too, but I heard he is not taking calls from boys anymore | |
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| Why aren't other races giving me messages ?
Posted: 8/5/2009 10:05:02 PM | I agree with the suggestions that you get a profile review and to email some men.
I would add to your profile that you are open to dating men of other races. | |
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| Why aren't other races giving me messages ?
Posted: 8/5/2009 10:09:51 PM | There is absolutely nothing wrong at all with having preferences. It's not racist to have a preference. I'm a sucker for a man's eyes and there is just something about green and blue eyes that makes me melt. (Not all guys with blue or green eyes, of course!). That doesn't mean that I haven't dated guys with brown eyes but there is something to be said for chemistry.
I'm Latina but have never dated a guy that was Latino. I'm not racist against my own people but in terms of what turns me on, my interests, my hobbies, etc., I just have more in common with men that are Caucasian. I've had Black women call me racist before b/c I don't date Black men but they can call me whatever they want - has no affect on my life whatsoever. | |
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| Why aren't other races giving me messages ?
Posted: 8/5/2009 10:15:57 PM | OP:
1. Take the initiative and make the first move when you find someone interesting.
2. Don't assume it will work. Be extremely patient. Each time become more patient than the last.
3. Prepare yourself for rejection, particularly if you are open to the whole spectrum, because you will be on the receiving end of it a lot more.
4. Repeat steps 1-3.
Isnuttinfree (And anyone else who thinks like this): Hello. Just one black man with an opinion/PSA here. When you pull the race card for petty things rooted in differences in opinion or personal preference, you completely disrespect the legacy of everyone who has ever suffered from the effects of racism, and you make legitimate arguments sound much weaker next time around. For lack of a better example, kind of like the boy who cried wolf, only far worse. If you are so passionate about the evils of racism, then yay for you. It's a very real thing that makes our world a difficult place sometimes. But please find a better cause than screaming racism when white folks are not interested in people other than their own kind. There are enough causes out there. Really. | |
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SJS37
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Joined: 7/21/2009
Msg: 21 | |
| Why aren't other races giving me messages ?
Posted: 8/5/2009 10:21:48 PM | isnuttinfree
Don't tell me who I have to be attracted to you moron. Odds are nobody would be attracted to you. Hence no picture on your profile. Go crawl back under your rock please. I would obviously date someone who was black, asian or indian if they were attractive, so I am not a racist. I only focus on the girls I think I have more in common with. Isn't that the purpose of all the questions when you sign up? I don't go around messaging a lot of girls I'm not likely to form a relationships with for a lot of reasons. Not just skin color. Only little kids with zero mentality say tool. It's not cool to say tool. Just to let you know.
Did I hurt your feeling on another thread? Is that where these baseless accusations are coming from? Sorry dude but I am a nice person and I always speak the truth so don't even try it. You lack the inteligence and the foundation.
WOW. Just checked out your profile..... You state you are only here to make fun of the idiots on the forums. Very nice person you are. Nice to find out this dude is pretending to be a woman. LOL. You talk like a dude you are obviously impersonating a woman so lonely guys will take your side. No woman talks the way you do. Tool. LOL.
It's a dude... All you so called Idiots can take that to the bank. Good as Cash! LOL | |
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