| What am I doing wrong?
Posted: 8/11/2009 11:02:10 PM | | Hello,I'm not used to talking about my problems.I usually deal with them but I guess its time for a change.It happened about a week and a half ago.I met this girl at a party,talked to her and things went great.A few days later,she comes over on a Friday afternoon.Since then,she has constantly said and done things to me that I wish never happened.I treat her like a queen,show her I love her and do all I can.It hasnt been just with her,I treat the partner I'm with like that.Its who I am.But her and all my past girlfriends used me and things I rather not speak of.Really....what am I doing wrong...if you have any ideas or anything.Please tell me....thank you. | |
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| What am I doing wrong?
Posted: 8/11/2009 11:06:09 PM | Two words: Door Mat
One more word: Moderation
Not trying to be mean, just getting down to brass tacks. Sometime the best answers are the simplist. | |
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| What am I doing wrong?
Posted: 8/11/2009 11:07:55 PM | | You love her and it's been a week and a half? There's your problem. | |
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| What am I doing wrong?
Posted: 8/11/2009 11:08:30 PM | | So your basically saying..I'm the reason right.That I'm being to "soft" in other words? | |
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| What am I doing wrong?
Posted: 8/11/2009 11:09:24 PM | | you met her a week and a half ago and you love her??? you sound like you cling to fast and make yourself far to available. You cant possibly love someone within a week and a half. and a week and a half is hardly time to truely treat someone good emotionally physically and mentally. if you are - you are acting as the first response said - as a door mat | |
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| What am I doing wrong?
Posted: 8/11/2009 11:11:02 PM | Ok, here's the thing. You say it's not just her, but all the women you've dated. What's the one thing all those women have in common? You!
You've never considered that you were the source of the problem? | |
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| What am I doing wrong?
Posted: 8/11/2009 11:11:03 PM | | You're being too affectionate/understanding too soon. Doormat as said above. Though I tried the opposite and it too blew up in my face man. Who knows...my advice...though I won't follow it is focus ONLY on yourself. Be greedy...until given a reason not to. | |
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| What am I doing wrong?
Posted: 8/11/2009 11:14:54 PM | | No I have considered it.And I agree...a door mat.And yeah...I "move" fast.Honestly,I really dont know why.All I really want is for others to be happy.But in the long run.....I guess life is just testing me. | |
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| What am I doing wrong?
Posted: 8/11/2009 11:22:18 PM | the point is you can only move fast if someone is moving at the same speed as you. If you move fast and they are going slow your going to find when you look over at them no one is there they are still four paces behind.
Unless you are spending every waking moment in conversation and with this person 10 days is not long enough to know them to love them - you may feel you could love them but actual love only occurs when you know the full person if they arent moving at the same speed you are you arent meeting the real person | |
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| What am I doing wrong?
Posted: 8/11/2009 11:22:44 PM | | You shouldn't ever put everybody's happiness before your own. If you can not be happy by yourself, then you will never find somebody to make you happy. It seems to me that your are attracting women who will use you just because they know you will let them. | |
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| What am I doing wrong?
Posted: 8/11/2009 11:25:09 PM | JMO..but have you told her you love her? IF that is the case, she is using you...
and you need to start spending time with yourself, to find out what makes YOU happy..not anyone else. you know the old saying? if your not happy, no ones happy? That rule applies! Make a list of what YOU want, expect out of a relationship...
Don't go soo fast in one either..take time to get to know her...
another thing, to tell a woman that you love her in less than a week? I know for me, that would scare me...because you really don't know me??? | |
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| What am I doing wrong?
Posted: 8/11/2009 11:31:44 PM | | I know I'm working on slowing-down.And to be honest,its hard for me to be happy.Like the saying "life doesnt owe you anything".I rather to my best and get what I can done before I "kick the bucket". | |
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| What am I doing wrong?
Posted: 8/12/2009 12:00:22 AM | Dude! You are 18! ENJOY IT! Get to know yourself, find your limits, get up and stand on your own two feet. YOU define your happyness, do not let others define it for you.
And remember to love yourself for who you are, if you don't then how in hell could you expect someone else to?
BAH! kids these days! ...Get off my lawn! | |
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| What am I doing wrong?
Posted: 8/12/2009 1:05:36 AM | OP, you and Titanium have the same problem. You BOTH act and react like Wile E. Coyote.
You see the roadrunner and instead of acting sensibly, you order up some ridiculous trick from ACME in order to catch it. When the trick fails, you blame ACME for selling junk to you. Wile E. Coyote couldn't light a match without something going wrong.
Your issues will not be solved by "tricks". Special clothes, special perfumes, special hobbies or special memberships in special organizations that use special phones with special numbers ----- all of that is for shit!!!!!  These things will NOT solve your problems!
- Relationships are NOT one-trick, one-liners that turn on and off with some catchphase. There will always be ups and downs, mistaken words, missed messages and the like. You have got to stop treating every conversation like it's pass/fail. Your desperation is drowning out everything else you do. I can read it in your posts, every deed you do is tainted with the stench of DESPERATION.
You try to be too nice, then you backtrack and resolve to be a "bad guy", then you flip again and grovel at women's feet, then you flip out, run and hide, then you come back and act arrogant like an ***hole, then back to being nice. Every day you spin around like a weather vane in a storm is day women will stay away.
You have got to calm down and be STABLE. One thing people often suggest on these boards is using a "wingman". I'd go beyond that and say you guys need a "mentor" to help settle you down. And you have to somehow realize that every missed opportunity is NOT the end!
The bottom line, what are you doing wrong? You expect INSTANT success. You expect NO ISSUES, NO ARGUMENTS, NO RESISTANCE. Your expectations are unrealistic, like a woman who literally wants a man to ride up on a white horse.
A relationship is a minefield of hazards, and let me say this -- you will NOT get to the other side of the minefield without losing some major body parts! This is true for EVERYONE. EVERYONE makes sacrifices to advance their romance.
SACRIFICE {time, money, opportunity, career, convenience, comfort, sanity} Take your pick, some of those items will be lost before you get to the happy place. But guess what?.....you can get them BACK in the long run. and more.
If you want the easy road, go pay a hooker, and leave the relationships to men who know determination, stability, and CONTROL. | |
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| What am I doing wrong?
Posted: 8/12/2009 1:08:19 AM | Nothing.
You've obviously been with the wrong women who don't deserve you. | |
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| What am I doing wrong?
Posted: 8/12/2009 1:23:22 AM | You are an extreme example of someone who needs to read any of about 1000 really good books out there on why you can't be a nice guy and succeed with women.
David D'Angelo advertises his book " Double your dating" write on this website and he absolutely pounds guys like you.
What makes matters worse is that some girls like Pranker Poet will tell you that you are wonderful just the way you are. What they don't understand is that while consciously they believe they should be with a nice guy like you, unconsciously they could never ever be attracted to you. They will justify it by telling themselves that they are not attracted to you because you share different interests etc.
Don't believe this crap. Women are not attracted to nice guys! | |
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| What am I doing wrong?
Posted: 8/12/2009 1:25:10 AM | O.o
I didn't even look at his profile?
To be honest a post wasn't posting on this other forum so I wrote a quick post on this forum to see if it would post.
lol. | |
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| What am I doing wrong?
Posted: 8/12/2009 1:39:35 AM | Hahaha Wack MC that was cold but true man! Door mat yes, moving to fast yes! You can't expect to catch up to a tire when its rolling down hill away from you. You met her at a party, shes sleeps with you, you love her after a week and a half? Maybe im not up to todays young status..... Dude easy terms, take a chill pill on love. You are in love with being in love. cheers! | |
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| What am I doing wrong?
Posted: 8/12/2009 1:48:10 AM | Yay...another pickup artist book sale in the makeing. 
insert barf smile here-> | |
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