| A miracle of sorts... at least for me!
Posted: 8/13/2009 11:47:07 AM | This is more of a testimonial, but I would like your input (guys!) Please?
I met a wonderful guy, but not from POF... I, as I'm sure a lot of people here, belong to another dating site...and that's where we 'met'... BUT POF is THE place for asking questions...so here's the story...
After a few e-mails back and forth, we decided to meet... Unfortunately, it was at a night club where a friend of mine was celebrating a b-day, and for some weird reason we never saw each other that night... He assures me he was there...but we didn't see each other...
Anyway, forward to last Saturday... I went to the same club again (owner is a friend!) and lo and behold... our eyes meet from across the room... He has his friend ask me to dance... I did... and then he comes over and asks himself... We danced for 3 songs in a row... and then he says: "I think you and I were supposed to meet here before... but we never did"...
I knew it was him when I saw him that night, but he was just being cautious... We had a good laugh... I was not offended that we hadn't met ...there were a LOT of people at that party before... and I actually didn't stay very long...I was just glad we had finally had the chance.. We danced ALL NIGHT!!!
At about 4 am, we decided to leave (they were closing!) he wanted to know when he would see me again... and HE SAID "Why don't we come here to dance again next Friday?" I said yes, of course...
He texted a couple of times during the week, very sweet, short messages wishing me a good day, etc.
Yesterday, I got a hold of a few of tickets to a baseball game...and texted him to see if he wanted to go... He said sure!!!
We had a BLAST at the game... and the thing that I find most adorable is that his friend, which had asked me to dance, said to me: "So, are we all going dancing again on Friday?"... Telling his friends about HIS plans with me must mean something, right?
This man is gorgeous, sweet, he's a poet (published!) an artist, and has NOT tried anything other than a soft kiss goodnight after the game... and a text a few minutes later saying thanks for a great night!
This is EXACTLY the guy I've been searching for... but for some reason, I can NOT let myself get carried away... I don't even want to think about him... I don't want this to NOT be true...
Have I actually found a gem? Or is just my imagination?
Thanks for the responses in advance!!!  | |
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| A miracle of sorts... at least for me!
Posted: 8/13/2009 11:50:35 AM | Sounds like you might have found gem. Just continue seeing him while maintaining awareness that not everything is what seems, but some things are.
Ted Bundy didn't go around acting like a serial killer, ya know?
The reality is that when people first meet, they are on their best behavior. But that doesn't mean someone's ordinary behavior when they're not acting can't be pretty awesome too.
I wish you luck. | |
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| A miracle of sorts... at least for me!
Posted: 8/13/2009 12:16:18 PM | Sorry but your story gives me a weird vibe too. Not everything may be what it seems.
If he was actually into you then that first night at the club he would have searched high and low to find you (I would have). He had his friend (boyfriend?) front for him the first time to dance with you. His friend (boyfriend?) already knows and is already included in your next dancing date. See where this may be going?
It may be nothing and I wish you well. Just be careful. | |
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| A miracle of sorts... at least for me!
Posted: 8/13/2009 12:25:29 PM |
Have I actually found a gem? Or is just my imagination?
After only two dates it is just your imagination. Only time will tell if he is really a gem so take the time to get to know him. | |
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| A miracle of sorts... at least for me!
Posted: 8/13/2009 12:25:30 PM | It sounds good so far but just play it by year. As the above poster said there is a weird thing to have his friend ask you to dance first rather than him. I mean that's just odd unless he's playing some sort of game. Obviously you two know what each other look like so him being like hey buddy go ask her out to dance I think she's the girl I was suppose to meet seems.... I have no clue what he was trying to get at.
As for the friend being like does that mean I get a dance to that might just be kidding around / playful banter who knows. If he really does try to dance with you though that might be cause to pause and think wtf...
Ahh but honestly yes a club is not that big of a place unless it's one of those huge ones with multiple floors, areas, extermely dimly lit, and so forth. Generally you can find anyone and I mean anyone after a certain amount of time if you are both there at the same time. Plus there is always the phone / text message like where are you at? I'm by the martini bar or whatever. Not sure why that didn't happen. I mean I guess your friend's birthday could have been like in an area that was corded off from the rest of the public.
Who knows but hopefully things go well for you and I would say just enjoy the time you do spend with each other and go from there. | |
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| A miracle of sorts... at least for me!
Posted: 8/13/2009 12:44:08 PM | | This doesn't seem like a genuine question but rather, an attention seeking post designed to try and make people envious of this seemingly wonderful guy you've found. Are you honestly asking, based on the information you've given, whether this guy is for "real" or not!? As if anything said here would change your future course of action?? This definitely belongs in "Dating Experiences", imo. | |
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SJS37
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Joined: 7/21/2009
Msg: 9 | |
| A miracle of sorts... at least for me!
Posted: 8/13/2009 1:05:51 PM | Hey if he makes you happy. Go for it. You don't want to go the rest of you life wondering about him.
I would be cautious though. He is not acting normal at all.
If he were really into you. He would have found you the first time.
I have no idea why he would have his friend ask you to dance.
I have no idea why his friend would ask you to dance. (actually I'd rather not speculate on that subject)
Why would he say lets dance next week? Why not tomorrow or the next day? He really only wants to see you once a week? It sounds more like he wants a dance partner to teach him how to dance or something. Nothing about this is making sense to me, but if it makes you happy, go for it. I can understand the first date maybe being shy or something but this is beyond all that. | |
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| A miracle of sorts... at least for me!
Posted: 8/13/2009 1:34:09 PM |
Have I actually found a gem? Or is just my imagination?
Ask again in 3-6 months.
There simply is not enough information to say anything except it seems you like him in some way.
This is EXACTLY the guy I've been searching for.
If a woman I dated twice said that I would be scared and run away. As the rest would be downhill as she actually got to know me.
but for some reason, I can NOT let myself get carried away
So you're attracted to him, and you are going to reign yourself in. Or try and act a way that isn't normal. Therefore giving him a false picture of who you are.
There you go. Nothing bad will come of that.
I don't want this to NOT be true
Uh-oh, desires may lead to games and insecurity as you try so hard to make sure you don't "lose" something, or you try to keep the relationship from ever changing to something real wanting to preserve what it is now.
I really hope you update this in the future. I wish I could place bets on who sabotages it first, or who blames whom first for the sabotage. | |
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| A miracle of sorts... at least for me!
Posted: 8/13/2009 1:37:48 PM | | Remember this is a NEW thing so there are going to be butterflies as you anticipate your next meeting. For sure he is in a bromance with his friend, are you ok with his friend always being around? | |
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| A miracle of sorts... at least for me!
Posted: 8/13/2009 5:09:06 PM | Just pay attention to the 3 month rule :p
Some people get it, some people dont.
But, after 3 months, you actually know if they do or are just good at fakeing it :p
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| A miracle of sorts... at least for me!
Posted: 8/13/2009 5:18:12 PM | I don't understand how anyone can get this excited this fast about someone.
I have felt lust from an attentive man right away but it takes a long time to get
to know the real person. It can be a disappointment when they aren't really
the fantasy perfect man they look like at first. They can seem perfect for at
least three months sometimes when they are attractive, but really be anything but
perfect. | |
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| A miracle of sorts... at least for me!
Posted: 8/13/2009 6:23:48 PM | | I've learned people often tell you what they think you want to hear. I can't begin to count the times i've heard people say they've found the one too early in the relationship and it ends up being over real quick. People have a habit of not showing their true colours for a year or two. It's hard not to fall sometimes for someone who you think is a gem. It's way too early for anyone to know. Be smart and patient and don't ignore any red flags because you want it so bad. | |
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| A miracle of sorts... at least for me!
Posted: 8/13/2009 7:07:57 PM | | its just your imagination, just cos he doesn't seem desperate and polite doesn't mean he's a perfect guy. This is just the type of guy women want, smart guys know this and act accordingly. He might also already have a good sex life which is why he's not desperate to get into you quick. | |
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| A miracle of sorts... at least for me!
Posted: 8/13/2009 7:50:51 PM | | This guy's a poet, a master of words. If anything awful happened you'd be devastated by his brash quips and perfectly executed comebacks that would leave you in utter dismay. You would be reduced to a shadow of your former self. Yo dawg don't loan him any money and don't enter into any financial contracts until you two are married | |
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| A miracle of sorts... at least for me!
Posted: 8/14/2009 1:25:15 AM | hi, i really hope he is the guy for you, but i think a statement like that at this stage is way too early, it takes along time to get to know someone so just be wary and DONT let yourself be carried away, and he may also be gay......just take it easy and slowly | |
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| A miracle of sorts... at least for me!
Posted: 8/14/2009 1:27:18 AM | ...if you think it might be what you were seeking...throw caution to the wind...stop stalling and grab hold ...dont let fear keep from getting what seems to be what you want
or simply ask yourself this...is the risk of getting hurt worse than knowing you did nothing and let that great guy slip past...pain is temporary...regret lingers on
go for it
do it
make it happen
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