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 faceman000
Joined: 1/22/2008
Msg: 1
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Has anyone met someone from this site and what happened.Page 1 of 4    (1, 2, 3, 4)
I've been on here for months and not actually met a soul. Made plenty of friends but this is supposed to be a dating site, right?

Another thing. Do women go for personality or looks? If they say personality, I find that hard to believe.

Point number 3. What is your success rate? I mean I write to at least 20 different women a night, 5 nights a week (100). Out of that 100, I get maybe 10-12 replies. Is that normal?

I'd love to go on one of those POF nights but I suppose fear of failure gets in the way. Anyone experience that?

Love to hear from you on all the above topics (if they haven't been done before!).
 ~JustSimplyMe~
Joined: 8/18/2006
Msg: 2
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Has anyone met someone from this site and what happened.
Posted: 8/18/2009 2:28:19 PM

Do women go for personality or looks?

If you have a great personality yet a face that looks like it was beaten with an ugly stick since you were 6yrs old...then your personality isn't enough to save you.
Sorry if that sounds shallow...but I need to be able to see sex appeal to go with the personality.

What is your success rate?

Does the fact that my one ltr from here is now thankfully over? I have met plenty of guys off here...am friends with most of them still.

Is that normal?

Considering that every other thread started is people whining about NO replies...thats above normal. Its what you do with the replies that is the kicker.

Anyone experience that?

Life is full of the fear of failure. You can't fail if you don't try...and if you don't try you never know what you missed out on. You may not meet the love of your life at a POF event, but you could very well make some great new friends.
 GeneralizingNow
Joined: 10/10/2007
Msg: 3
Has anyone met someone from this site and what happened.
Posted: 8/18/2009 2:28:22 PM
Well, many of us women folk are't into drunkards.

Point two, how do you measure "success"?

Lastly, they have all been done before.
 michaels_girl
Joined: 7/6/2009
Msg: 4
Has anyone met someone from this site and what happened.
Posted: 8/18/2009 2:32:22 PM
Ok I'll bite lol

First of all yes personality is important to some women (not all). Not saying that looks are not important at all but personality is definitely higher on my list of priorities.

Secondly as for meeting someone on here. Yes actually I met my fiance on here three years ago. We are getting married next September. There is definitely success on these websites.

And thirdly - you said you send out 100 emails per week. Instead of sending out so many "form letters" why not try weeding through the profiles until you find one that "really" interests you and then writing a real letter. Most women can see right through the "bulk" messages and most won't even bother reading them all the way through. Say something in your email that makes the person believe that you actually read her profile.

JMHO

Michaels_girl
 OutMind
Joined: 2/13/2007
Msg: 5
Has anyone met someone from this site and what happened.
Posted: 8/18/2009 2:33:34 PM
I once met a squirrel, unfortunately I ran over it.

Oh well.
 OnlyThis
Joined: 3/31/2009
Msg: 6
Has anyone met someone from this site and what happened.
Posted: 8/18/2009 2:37:53 PM
Profile review section. Your profile starts off with a self deprecating comment that leads to...

I've been on here for months and not actually met a soul.
 idoc_steve
Joined: 3/20/2009
Msg: 7
Has anyone met someone from this site and what happened.
Posted: 8/18/2009 2:45:11 PM

borrachon000- Point number 3. What is your success rate? I mean I write to at least 20 different women a night, 5 nights a week (100). Out of that 100, I get maybe 10-12 replies. Is that normal?


I'd say your response rate is slightly better than mine however your criteria for success is skewed, in my opinion.

I define my success by the women I meet and the relationships that result. POF has been very good to me.
 Ideoform
Joined: 9/23/2007
Msg: 8
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Has anyone met someone from this site and what happened.
Posted: 8/18/2009 2:45:43 PM
I've met several people here that I've dated for more than a couple of dates. I am seeing someone right now and we are going on 5 months together. Don't use this site as your main way of meeting people. Its not any easier here than anywhere else...the main advantage of this site for me is that I have some unusual interests and life circumstances, so I was able to meet someone I might not otherwise have met in a million years who matched my interests.

I went to several PoF get-togethers. I enjoyed them. It was nice knowing some people by just having seen them a bit online...it is better than not knowing anything at all about anybody. The get-togethers are as good as the people in your area make them. I even hosted one because I wanted to have one that related to swing dancing. It was fun. Make the event more about having fun than getting a date. Just meet people, hear their stories, and you will enjoy yourself. If you are having fun you will be easier to approach if someone is interested in you.

Don't make it about "success" or "failure." It is all just life. Its all just people. Its your life...make it shine wherever you are. Whoever you meet will be one step closer to finding out what you want, what you like, who likes you, and learning to socialise and have a nice time with lots of types of people, both men and women.

As for personality, a person who is relaxed, having fun, is interested in others, not too self-conscious, and doesn't mind making a mistake or laughing about themselves is an attractive person. People seem much more good-looking when they are interested and listening to others...and are not caring too much about how its all going.

Looks are great, but you can't change your height, or your age, and most anything you change just for one person will put a strain on any relationship...change what you want for yourself or you risk resenting the other person for all the work you are "having" to do to keep them interested.

Healthy is the best "look." Passion for your life and interests also looks good on a person. Other than that, you learned the rest in kindergarten; dress as well as you can, come prepared with some things to talk about, have a plan B if the night is not going the way you would like so you can still have some fun.

Don't keep score in your head. Its not about the score, its about the process. The end is when we die. Everything else is the journey. Enjoy your freedom while you are single, enjoy the single life. Even as you prepare to be more involved with someone someday, you are living a time in your life you will never get back again.
 ForumFlounder
Joined: 3/13/2009
Msg: 9
Has anyone met someone from this site and what happened.
Posted: 8/18/2009 2:58:00 PM
When I was initially on with a "serious " profile. ..... In the duration of about 3 mos:


Guy #1 ( I messaged him) : I found him physically attractive (tall, athletic build, gentlemanly) YET after just 2 dates ... I just didn't think our personalities meshed. I thought some of his jokes were a bit off-color. I couldn't put up with his constant talking. lol

Guy #2 (He messaged me): A few yrs younger than me, cute but what can I say ... he had bad teeth. Hung out twice, the second time I was just less attracted to him, hence no-go.

Guy#3 (He messaged me) : I didn't find myself that physically attracted to him. Yet thought, why not give it a chance. It was spontaneous that after having some coffee, he just invited me for a bike ride .. which I thought was cool & sexy (didn't really think of the risk/accident factor then!) .. BUT I was totally turned off when he tried to initiate a really awkward kiss (mouth to mouth)-- which I was NOT expecting -- umm hello, we've only met like an hour and a half ago!! -- Needless to say, there wasn't a second date.

Guy #4 (He messaged me) : I was smitten he agreed to drive an hour to meet me, whilst my drive was only about 25 minutes. ..... It was nice and amicable, yet really no sparks. Rather boring to be honest.

Guy #5 (He messaged me) : Rather than meeting over coffee or drinks I invited him to an open party. Suggested that he bring a friend along too, so as not to feel too awkward ... WELL, funny thing was ... I ended up liking his friend more than HIM!!! ..lol .... Might have not turned out well .. so no further pursue there.

Guy#6 ( I messaged him) : Have to say he was probably the one that held most potential. He lived in a bordering state about a good 6 - 7 hours drive away. Despite that, he took the drive, rented his own room in town and even offered to drive us around! .... I was really smitten! .... Despite the fact that he was the youngest guy (of the bunch that I met off here) he was extremely mature and very well rounded. We both had traveled overeas a bit and could relate to a lot more things together. ..... Spent a day and a half together. At the end of the date, I had to come to terms that an LDR probably wasn't the thing for me. Despite the fact that we seemed to mesh quite well -- I just could not imagine commuting every other weekend or so. He left saying "Regardless whether or not this amounts to anything, I would have been more dissapointed if I had not made the drive here". ..... I could see myself possibly fallin for him .... ... But the reality of distance set in and we parted our own ways.

 jdawg4876
Joined: 8/22/2008
Msg: 10
Has anyone met someone from this site and what happened.
Posted: 8/18/2009 3:04:27 PM
Steve has it right, I have been on many dates here but its quality over numbers any day
 oregonsaint
Joined: 5/22/2009
Msg: 11
Has anyone met someone from this site and what happened.
Posted: 8/18/2009 3:11:27 PM
Men will always have to send alot of emails to recieve replies. If you are getting the 10% return on your messaging efforts that you say you are, then you are doing better than most.

Fear of failure/rejection is not abnormale for anyone if you ask me. It is how yu deal with it that seperates you from the rest. suck it up and go for it. You get out of dating what you put into it, and no one ever got far, with out taking a few calculated risks.

Looks Vs. Personality? lol....that is the age old debate. I would definately have to say that it is nearly always looks over personality on the internet. Lets be realistic, you really cant judge personality that well through a computer screen. In real life, I would say that even an average looking guy would fare better in the personality department.

Good luck to you.
 AnglFlynToCloseToGround
Joined: 4/16/2008
Msg: 12
Has anyone met someone from this site and what happened.
Posted: 8/18/2009 3:26:05 PM
That is a lot of women to be writting to each day ... Women are more likely to go out with someone who puts feeling and effert in writting to them and I dont think you could put too much into it if you are doing 20 a night ... (that sounds like a joke lol) ...

I have been to those POF get togethers and I have FUN and there are a lot of really nice ppl ... You wont click with everyone so you need to find your groud and have some FUN too ... The key is to go to have a good time and if something happens then it does ...

I wish you the best hun ...

AnglFlyn
 honeyangel1985
Joined: 6/25/2009
Msg: 13
Has anyone met someone from this site and what happened.
Posted: 8/18/2009 3:29:56 PM
I've had a relationship in the past with someone from POF. And well he's my ex now and for good reasons too.
 Lovinlifeat44
Joined: 9/22/2007
Msg: 14
Has anyone met someone from this site and what happened.
Posted: 8/18/2009 3:36:41 PM
I have met some very nice people from POF. Had a very short relationship with someone from here and although it didn't work out, I have no hard feelings. It just wasn't there.

However, there are so many wonderful people on POF. I have friends that are on here (males and females), old boyfriends, and right now I'm laughing like hell with an old boyfriend about one of the threads.

I have really enjoyed the forums and will not hesitate to contact someone if I enjoy their posts or threads.

I'm not sure if I'll find the love of my life on here, but I'm sure having fun.
 Helen0426
Joined: 6/2/2009
Msg: 15
Has anyone met someone from this site and what happened.
Posted: 8/18/2009 3:38:06 PM

Do women go for personality or looks?

Depends on the woman, which is more important, but she'll have to talk to you to get a good sense of your personality. She might be more likely to talk to you if you shave. This is a visual medium; personality may indeed be more important to a woman than looks, but you've gotta be a hell of a writer to get it across well enough to eclipse appearance on a monitor screen.


Out of that 100, I get maybe 10-12 replies. Is that normal?

In terms of ratio, yes. What is a little odd is 10-12 replies a day still haven't resulted in a date. You're screwing up somewhere after that point, but obviously I don't know how.


I'd love to go on one of those POF nights but I suppose fear of failure gets in the way. Anyone experience that?

Not in your area. Here the men were vastly outnumbered, so it was great for them, but I don't know how it might be there.
 Tyefromnj1
Joined: 10/11/2008
Msg: 16
Has anyone met someone from this site and what happened.
Posted: 8/18/2009 4:45:54 PM
I don't know if my success rate is good but I've been on here a year and been on four or maybe five dates.

First was in the city, A turkish girl less attractive in person, with a major accent. She blew smoke in my face in a hookah bar. That was the end of that.

Second was in Brooklyn. Big russian accent. Very boring and turn out to be a racist. She said that jews are cheap right after one walked by. That was the end of that.

Third was a metal girl. Lots of tattoo and fairly attractive. She was mentally abused and like to hit me alot to show that women are just strong as men. She was a big c ocktease and just frustrated me to death. She was done also

Fourth was a vampire wannabe and wanted to suck my neck. Alas that too was done.

Maybe I have Chandler bing syndrome but I stick to high standards.

Dates were bad. Women are available. You won't find the best catches unless you are lucky. Try to be confident, witty and not pathetic and you'll have better luck.

Tye
 minako79
Joined: 1/15/2009
Msg: 17
Has anyone met someone from this site and what happened.
Posted: 8/18/2009 4:57:49 PM
i had a minor success with pof, signed back in dec 07 and had a few dates and eventually had an 8 month relationship... then fast forward, signed up back in jan 09 and met two nice people and one of them turned out to be a friend, still chatting with a few people outside of canada.

as for pof, not sure yet... whether i will meet him here or offline, doesn't really matter. only time will tell..
 ProlificProdigal
Joined: 7/28/2009
Msg: 18
Has anyone met someone from this site and what happened.
Posted: 8/18/2009 6:50:05 PM

Point number 3. What is your success rate? I mean I write to at least 20 different women a night, 5 nights a week (100). Out of that 100, I get maybe 10-12 replies. Is that normal?

A little over 10%. Not bad. From what I have heard from men, most get less than that.


I'd love to go on one of those POF nights but I suppose fear of failure gets in the way. Anyone experience that?


Some people 'play' better in person than they do on a two-dimensional medium.


Do women go for personality or looks? If they say personality, I find that hard to believe.

Take a deep breath, and dive in. Go to a POF function. Give the ladies a chance to get to know your personality.
Good luck!
 indigoeyes
Joined: 8/26/2006
Msg: 19
Has anyone met someone from this site and what happened.
Posted: 8/18/2009 7:13:44 PM
I met my bf here more than two years ago. Along the way I met several very good friends. I'll answer the personality vs. looks question with my honest answer. For me it is a combination of both. Looks only go so far in any relationship. As far as a success rate...I think that is subjective, success for me is entirely different than it is for you.
 CChauncey
Joined: 5/22/2009
Msg: 20
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Has anyone met someone from this site and what happened.
Posted: 8/18/2009 7:15:32 PM
Weird thing is I see girls from this site at random bars. Just saw one on Sunday, another last Thursday. Both times I didn't say anything and I don't plan on messaging them. I don't want there to be any awkwardness since I plan on going back to both places.
 EvilLolli
Joined: 12/7/2008
Msg: 21
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Has anyone met someone from this site and what happened.
Posted: 8/18/2009 7:16:51 PM
Met a few people off of here(male and female), will probably meet more as friends or whatever. It is a dating site but it's not the only way to find a date. If dating is your only focus in life, you are missing out on such much.

I personally go for looks and personality. I want to not cringe when I see someone in bright light(Oh the Humanity!), and not be bored into gouging my eyes out by a lack of personality(because that would be more interesting than watching them think of ways to be impressive). Its that simple.

If you're actually messeging 100 women a week, you must be using form letters or short, boring notes. Form letters only work on the weak. Be more selective and you might have better luck.
 minnieb1973
Joined: 7/29/2009
Msg: 22
Has anyone met someone from this site and what happened.
Posted: 8/18/2009 7:41:23 PM
I go more for a "connection"...there has to be some spark involved..been on here for a year and I met 3 people from this site so far, the first one was one of the greatest guys I ever met, we had a brief "affair"...didn't work "relationship wise" but made a great friend...
the 2nd guy was a real piece of work, nothing came out of it needless to say...
the 3rd guy I had a brief relationship with and was really into , needless to say, it's over....anyways that's life
get back up and start again...I think you need to work on loving yourself before anyone else can love you....
I don't write to 100 people a week, there is no way I am interested in 100 people on here...
I only write to men who REALLY catch my eye...i have no interest in stringing along someone I have no interest in simply because I am bored...
And, I do believe that one day, I will find my match, be it here , in the supermarket or on the street.....
good luck
 7i857
Joined: 8/22/2007
Msg: 23
Has anyone met someone from this site and what happened.
Posted: 8/18/2009 7:47:59 PM
Yes.

1) Went to a night club. Neither of us cared too much for the other, and we were both downers to one another. She left and I stayed to have fun!

2) Restaurant in her city with two of her friends. We tried scheduling something else, but eventually she said she doesn't want to talk to me anymore. Oh well.

I've been apprehensive about meeting other people since. Honestly, most of the people I meet online aren't through POF or another dating site, rather social networking sites that aren't Facebook or MySpace. I've met more people through activity groups/clubs and it's always much less stressful (you're going for the club, not to find a date) and more rewarding (at the very least you make more friends).
 Phil4789
Joined: 7/8/2009
Msg: 24
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Has anyone met someone from this site and what happened.
Posted: 8/18/2009 7:53:57 PM
Keep in mind that many, if not a majority of the cute female faces you see on here are not looking for dates. It's a ego-boosting thing to see how many guys will write or pay attention to them.

But it's still not a bad site for the price and there are some here who actually want to meet in person. I've been out with a couple. I think the key is to be persistent and don't give up. Also be willing to explore other sites and other options.
 Kennedy3
Joined: 4/20/2009
Msg: 25
Has anyone met someone from this site and what happened.
Posted: 8/18/2009 8:01:17 PM
ive met some really nice people on pof and have several friends. i was dating a guy for a couple of months. we got along really well but there wasnt any "chemistry" between us. we had a good time together but it was one of those "till someting better comes along" deals. we were better suited as friends. no regrets. both looks and personality are important to me. there has to be an initial attraction but personality can dramatically enhance my perception of physical appearance. ive never been to a pof event. you miss every shot you never take. go to the event without expectations. showing up is success! if you meet some people even better. i know its easier said than done.
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