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Show ALL Forums  > Over 30  > 37 and still single? Why won't a woman date me?      Home login  
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 virendra36
Joined: 8/10/2008
Msg: 1
37 and still single? Why won't a woman date me?Page 1 of 3    (1, 2, 3)
Hi there.

How is everyone?

I am a 37 yr old man and always been single. I have friends, but sadly, most of them are married or dating.

Until last year, I was diagnosed with dyslexia and now possibly have a mild for of Aspergers. I didn't have any confidence or self esteem, until November 2007 and had a very bad time at school and in my 20's etc.

But I ask myself, am I being punished by most women of dating age for no reason by their ignorance and prejudice, for who I am and what I have? Have they got a complex issue with me and if so why?

I love myself but why won't any decent woman who's single and unattached, want me? What have I done, that makes women not want to date or have me as their partner? I'm a decent, friend, kind, trustworthy and respectful person, if someone got to know me properly vice versa, but nobody wants to know.

Are there any other people who are in the same boat as me, male or female, dyslexic or not, encounter similar experiences to me? I'm searching for answers. Please discuss. Thanks.

Virendra
 privat33r
Joined: 2/8/2009
Msg: 2
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37 and still single? Why won't a woman date me?
Posted: 8/20/2009 5:39:42 PM
Almost everyone I meet thinks I have some sort of dyslexia or Adult ADD, but i'm making sure their plane doesn't do something wacky on the way to Europe. Remove everything about dyslexia from your profile, 76.44% of the people you'll meet have more serious difficulties.

93.28% of the people in the world who have, or have had that difficulty don't even know the term exists.
 CaRo78
Joined: 2/22/2009
Msg: 3
37 and still single? Why won't a woman date me?
Posted: 8/20/2009 5:50:52 PM
maybe the fact that you are looking for women much younger than you may be a key issue in you not meeting you on here! you should try to broaden your age range.

also, consider a profile review..........................
 virendra36
Joined: 8/10/2008
Msg: 4
37 and still single? Why won't a woman date me?
Posted: 8/20/2009 5:53:32 PM
I've just done that, but I can't hide my learning difference from people. If I do that, then I'm not being honest with them. I agree other people will have more serious difficulties than mine.
 virendra36
Joined: 8/10/2008
Msg: 5
37 and still single? Why won't a woman date me?
Posted: 8/20/2009 5:58:09 PM
Some younger women go for older men. I see myself with a younger woman one day. Many women younger than me, are in relationships with men who are twice their age.
 chandlers wish
Joined: 6/22/2008
Msg: 6
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37 and still single? Why won't a woman date me?
Posted: 8/20/2009 6:05:45 PM

I see myself with a younger woman one day
''

There may be your problem... You aren't looking at the lady for who she is, rather you have a "wish list".........
 missdi123
Joined: 3/19/2008
Msg: 7
37 and still single? Why won't a woman date me?
Posted: 8/20/2009 6:19:25 PM
Well, maybe you should put up more pictures? Here is the thing, you are 5'5, that's just not working for a lot of girls. As occupation you list man of leisure? What is that supposed to mean? It comes across that you are lazy and don't want to work or can't find a decent job. Do you live with your parents? I think you are:)
 virendra36
Joined: 8/10/2008
Msg: 8
37 and still single? Why won't a woman date me?
Posted: 8/20/2009 6:22:29 PM
I've learned in the last year, I have been able to interact and communicate with younger women born after 1980 and older women born before 1969. So there's a generation gap of some kind. It was very difficult and challenging for me to communicate with women born in the 1970's, especially during my time at school and years later at work.

My friend who is 33, got married a few months ago, and his wife is 21. Right or wrong, many younger women like the older type. So I'm sure I will be one of them, because I'll be making up for lost time, by playing catch up.
 privat33r
Joined: 2/8/2009
Msg: 9
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37 and still single? Why won't a woman date me?
Posted: 8/20/2009 6:29:12 PM
okay.. remove all your restrictions. That's just work for girls to look over.

Listen to the advise of the girls who are commenting. They're black zen masters.

Stop arguing about why you should date younger women. That's the opposite of how to date younger women.

Your pics are fairly decent, get more, get them outdoors. -- by the way-- remove the dyslexia references. Don't mention it. There's no purpose to it. You're not hiding something, anyone who meets you will evaluate the whole picture, you're not selling lemonade in a kindergarten.
 virendra36
Joined: 8/10/2008
Msg: 10
37 and still single? Why won't a woman date me?
Posted: 8/20/2009 6:32:42 PM
Missdi123, like many here, through no fault of my own, I'm out of work and also at the same time, not only have I gained qualifications at bookkeeping and payroll (foundation level), I can't find a trainee role anywhere locally and beyond, that will take me on. It's very quiet at the job front. So that means, I'm not given a chance to fulfill my potential and move up the career and economic ladder.

I have an Irish friend, who lives with his partner (same age as me and out of work over a year), but he considered rejoining the army jokingly, until I talked him out of it. He praised me for being honest with him and apologised for his prank.

And yes I do live with my parents, but while I had a job, the money I earned, wasn't good enough to fly the nest.
 TwinkiMilton
Joined: 4/1/2009
Msg: 11
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37 and still single? Why won't a woman date me?
Posted: 8/20/2009 6:48:25 PM
Technicaly its possible at 37 to be the father of that 21 year old! And that is just CREEPY!

 virendra36
Joined: 8/10/2008
Msg: 12
37 and still single? Why won't a woman date me?
Posted: 8/20/2009 6:51:48 PM
Ha ha ha, love your sense of humour.
 virendra36
Joined: 8/10/2008
Msg: 13
37 and still single? Why won't a woman date me?
Posted: 8/20/2009 7:07:52 PM

Your pics are fairly decent, get more, get them outdoors. -- by the way-- remove the dyslexia references. Don't mention it. There's no purpose to it. You're not hiding something, anyone who meets you will evaluate the whole picture, you're not selling lemonade in a kindergarten.


Well I've added some more pictures as requested. Let's hope I can get some positive feedback.
 missdi123
Joined: 3/19/2008
Msg: 14
37 and still single? Why won't a woman date me?
Posted: 8/20/2009 7:13:31 PM
I didn't respond to your post because I wanted to trash talk you. I know how the economy is. I am very thankful to have a job. I was just stating facts. Let's be realistic, there aren't a lot of girls who want to date someone who is unemployed and who lives with his parents. That's just a fact.
 virendra36
Joined: 8/10/2008
Msg: 15
37 and still single? Why won't a woman date me?
Posted: 8/20/2009 7:24:04 PM

I am very thankful to have a job. I was just stating facts. Let's be realistic, there aren't a lot of girls who want to date someone who is unemployed and who lives with his parents. That's just a fact.


Not everyone can afford to leave home. I'm sorry to hear your trashing me to make you feel good about yourself. Not everyone's is financially secure as you like them to be.
Not everyone has the same level of equal opportunities as others.

Missdi123, you might have a job now, but later you might not.
 p~s
Joined: 4/13/2008
Msg: 16
37 and still single? Why won't a woman date me?
Posted: 8/20/2009 7:49:18 PM
You're profile is good and you are a nice looking man OP so I don't know what to say, bad luck?
 p~s
Joined: 4/13/2008
Msg: 17
37 and still single? Why won't a woman date me?
Posted: 8/20/2009 8:00:23 PM

There may be your problem... You aren't looking at the lady for who she is, rather you have a "wish list".........

This I have to agree with, looking for a woman who's 10 years younger or possibly more makes it seem you are looking for a woman based on superficial reasons. Also you don't want children and many younger women do.
Ummm.. and about being open to Bi women makes it seem like you are not really seriously looking for a relationship so much as someone to have a little kink with.
 virendra36
Joined: 8/10/2008
Msg: 18
37 and still single? Why won't a woman date me?
Posted: 8/20/2009 8:14:16 PM
As I've explained earlier, I can communicate better with some age groups than others. I don't really want to repeat myself and have explained once. I was hoping the bi-woman would happen much later so to speak, but I'm on a learning curve at the moment and having to find things out for myself, with the help of others here too.
 Pitch Blease
Joined: 3/4/2009
Msg: 19
37 and still single? Why won't a woman date me?
Posted: 8/20/2009 8:14:35 PM
Oh wow, these people are being kind to you to say the least.

Time for some tough love. This is not picking on you, it's stating facts you put forth when you started this thread!

First, your pics aren't even current...they are all from last year or older. A couple look like you are in black face (read:offensive)

Next...You are 5'5" (short for a man), you are unemployed, live with your parents, have a learning disability...Did I miss anything? BUT YET you are seeking a much younger woman (bi sexual is okay with you have you even had sex???) and you are basing your friend's relationships on what YOU THINK you deserve. Time to wake up and smell the coffee. Why won't women date you??? You answered your own question! I don't care how nice a guy you say you are...It's a cruel hard world out there and tougher on a dating site. You got a lot going against you. Thems the breaks.

Hell I'm 40 and never been married (not that I ever want to be..it's my own choice) ...at least I know my faults and not trying to kid myself that I'm something I'm not.
 p~s
Joined: 4/13/2008
Msg: 20
37 and still single? Why won't a woman date me?
Posted: 8/20/2009 8:33:24 PM
No woman wants to date a guy who is not able to take care of himself, he will likely end up our dependent rather than a partner. I know if you want to work you will, even if you are working at Tim Horton's for christ sake! Teenagers who make 10 bucks an hour live on their own and manage to be independent.
I understand that in some more traditional Hindu families the son is living at home because he is taking care of his parents in their old age and you are not even doing this.
I was being nice in my first post about it being bad luck, but then I actually read your profile.
Sorry dear but I think you need to collect yourself and make some personal changes before you even begin to consider a `partner`.
 missdi123
Joined: 3/19/2008
Msg: 21
37 and still single? Why won't a woman date me?
Posted: 8/20/2009 9:12:59 PM
Oh, for Pete's sake. Pay attention! I said I was NOT trying to trash talk you. OK, I am done. Good luck.
 chandlers wish
Joined: 6/22/2008
Msg: 22
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37 and still single? Why won't a woman date me?
Posted: 8/20/2009 9:26:06 PM

missdi123 (wrote)
<div class="quote">I didn't respond to your post because I wanted to trash talk you. I know how the economy is.

Wish there was a bold button here, because you got on the defense and need to apologise.. I can clearly read I DID NOT....

Anyways.

You are quite egotistical.. You have a wish list whether you want to admit it or not.

We can all do this but it will not get us anywhere in life. It's like putting things into boxes, with ticks and crosses.. You will run out of ticked boxes, they will all be crosses.

You've stated you "intend" to do the bi thing, she has to be 21 like your mates, or therebouts, and then go into 70'80's yet what music do you enjoy?

The Economy sucks. Your 37, if you love yourself as you state, that's meant to be the inner you.. Can you really love the inner you who blames Economy for the reason why your un-employed and living with your Mother...?

Your not stable financially, but your 37... You live with your Mum and it's time to realise that it's a big world out there and nothing, nothing is impossible...... and this will be the biggest turn off to any lady..... Because you are using an excuse. Go wash dishes to start with.


You seem to agree with things that make you "look" better, and disagree with everything else as far as suggestions go, with excuses but then change those too because heck, that may win you a date.

It's a tough life... Don't get to 40, it's only 3 years away and still not have work and live with your Mum... Get a job and show your stuff.. Then you will get dates..

Pictures and words are useless, if you can't see that you have nothing stable to provide a lady...

Don't take that the wrong way.. It's just facts. If I took your "poor me" approach over the Economy as a Realtor and business owner, I would have surely lost it all...
 guyd42
Joined: 10/13/2008
Msg: 23
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37 and still single? Why won't a woman date me?
Posted: 8/20/2009 10:14:07 PM
OP, just learn to like being by yourself. Dating at this age group is ridiculous. Do you really need to put yourself through all this foolishness? Don’t even ask yourself what’s wrong with you. There’s probably nothing just like there’s probably been nothing wrong with me since I joined this site 6 years ago. Dating at our age is just way too complicated.
 amusing_guy
Joined: 8/23/2008
Msg: 24
37 and still single? Why won't a woman date me?
Posted: 8/21/2009 5:47:42 AM
Why would you expect any women to be interested in you when your unemployed and living at home? I understand times are tough but you have to be willing to make changes in your life in order to find good quality women.
 MePlusTwo
Joined: 7/9/2008
Msg: 25
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37 and still single? Why won't a woman date me?
Posted: 8/21/2009 6:12:54 AM
Virendra36, I would imagine the reason you are finding it hard to date is:
You are unemployed
You live at home
You are 5' 5"
You don't want children
You may have a mild form of Aspergers - actually, if this is the case, this is a major major thing when it comes to success at dating

Now, any one of the above could make it far more challenging to date. But you have a very long list of things that come under the heading of "I would prefer not to date a man who......"

I am sorry to sound harsh. But you asked and that is the answer. If you indeed have Aspergers, you are going to need some guidance and support around your social skills as they are probably an obstacle in getting a date.

Additionally, whilst you are unemployed and living at home, it's going to severely limit your dating pool.

AND you don't want children and are 'vertically challenged'?

Look, your dating pool is almost certainly going to remain non-existent until you start to work on those things that are within your control to change and manage.

Time to face reality. You're 37. What do you want for your life? If part of the answer is a partner, then it's time to make some changes. Because your chances of dating right now are slim to none. But much of that is within your control.
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