| Man Law
Posted: 8/24/2009 6:26:11 PM | I noticed the Califorum version of this has disappeared.
Man Laws are those unwritten rules of conduct that must be adhered to by all men who want to be card carrying members of the masculine gender.
Man Law: Asian massage parlors are valid forms of health care. Medical studies have proven men who have sex the most often live the longest. Therefore, happy endings are now MANdated for healthy living.
Man Law: "Zen Days" shall require a vist to an Asian massage parlor. Laying around with cucumbers on your eyes is officially deemed foofoo and does not adhere to Man Law. Pedicures, mud baths and exfoliating are also considered to be as prissy as cucumber eyelid therapy. Also, just because you can find the word "man" in "manicure" does not make it manly. This too is a sissy lala form of pampering.
Man Law: Speedos are no longer considered fashionable swimwear.
Man Law: There shall be no talking to the guy standing next to you at the urinal in public restrooms. | |
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| Man Law
Posted: 8/24/2009 9:16:30 PM | So, I guess that makes you a non-card carrying jock strap wearer with jock itch. IMPRESSIVE!! 
Man Law: There are some things about men that women would prefer NOT to know. | |
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| Man Law
Posted: 8/24/2009 10:15:08 PM | | Man Law is an oxymoron. | |
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| Man Law
Posted: 8/24/2009 10:28:35 PM | | Hold on I need to scratch my _________ | |
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| Man Law
Posted: 8/25/2009 5:12:31 AM | I agree with the "speedo' law except in the case of Olympian swim athletes.  | |
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| Man Law
Posted: 8/25/2009 12:36:18 PM | Man Law: No man shall have a tattoo located on the small of his back. Tramp stamps are forbidden, however if a tattoo originates from the shoulder blades and continues to the lower back, it will be deemed acceptable as a manly tattoo, unless of course it is a butterfly, pixie or a male's name.
Man Law: Movies with Olympia Dukakis, Barbara Streisand or Jessica Tandy are considered to be "chick flicks" and are not to be spoken of during happy hour at the local sports bar.
Man Law: No fruit in the beer. | |
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| Man Law
Posted: 8/25/2009 1:42:04 PM |
Man Law: No fruit in the beer.
But, is beer in the fruit ok?
Asking just in case I happen to visit Granola Valley where all of the fruits,nuts and flakes live.. | |
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| Man Law
Posted: 8/25/2009 1:53:53 PM |
"Man Law: Asian massage parlors are valid forms of health care. Medical studies have proven men who have sex the most often live the longest. Therefore, happy endings are now MANdated for healthy living.
May be healthy living for a man, but not necessarily the Asian women working in a massage parlor.
Many women are working as "indentured slaves" to pay off their debt to the owners of the massage parlors. Some never get out of debt because they are over-charged for living quarters, etc....
Something you may or may not be aware of. | |
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| Man Law
Posted: 8/25/2009 4:35:15 PM | Man Law: No man shall pull up to a stop light blaring "I Will Survive", "YMCA" or "It's Raining Men" from their car stereo.
Man Law: No man shall pull up to a stop light driving a VW Cabriolet, VW Rabbit or PT Cruiser. | |
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| Man Law
Posted: 8/25/2009 5:45:31 PM | Add Ford TBird to that.
(Hey, I love my YMCA tee shirt) | |
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| Man Law
Posted: 8/25/2009 8:21:53 PM | Oh where or where is the minister when we need him?
hmmmm....hope he didn't hit himself in the head with his gavel......
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| Man Law
Posted: 8/25/2009 8:28:03 PM | | ^^^ He can't show up here yet. He knows I still have his man card. | |
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| Man Law
Posted: 8/25/2009 9:41:09 PM | May be healthy living for a man, but not necessarily the Asian women working in a massage parlor.
She does not really love him long time after all?
He can't show up here yet. He knows I still have his man card.
So...did you slip it out of his shorts, or did you dive for it after it fell to the bottom of the pool? Do tell. On the other hand, perhaps not as it could be too much information.
On topic, I'm with Mz. T. | |
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| Man Law
Posted: 8/25/2009 9:43:01 PM | | I may have noticed it laying on somebody's carpet. | |
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| Man Law
Posted: 8/25/2009 9:44:29 PM | ^^^At least it wasn't on the wood or whatever substance that it was made of...nor touching wood. The Minister will be relieved to know that. | |
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| Man Law
Posted: 8/25/2009 9:47:06 PM | | You're right. I think it flopped out of his shorts when he relieved himself. | |
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| Man Law
Posted: 8/25/2009 9:48:52 PM | Methinks the Minister would be much more relieved if you were touching wood!
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| Man Law
Posted: 8/25/2009 9:50:05 PM | | ^^^'Tis a relief. Not a man, but perhaps there ought to be a law about flooring that can rise to the occasion of male "relief". | |
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| Man Law
Posted: 8/25/2009 9:50:56 PM | You thinks he would be much more relieved if I touched his wood?
I can see his reputation precedes him. | |
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| Man Law
Posted: 8/26/2009 5:52:08 PM | I can see his reputation precedes him.
Wondering if that was all that was preceding him
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| Man Law
Posted: 8/26/2009 6:27:45 PM |
Man Laws are those unwritten rules of conduct that must be adhered to by all men who want to be card carrying members of the masculine gender.
Can you really be a "man" if you need a card to tell you how masculine you are? | |
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| Man Law
Posted: 8/26/2009 6:59:22 PM | | Naw - we have you for that. | |
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| Man Law
Posted: 8/26/2009 8:39:26 PM | Man Law: Raising the toilet seat is considered a cleanly act even if said man is single. No man shall be so comfortable in his solitude as to not expect a woman to suddenly appear and inspect his hygenic practices.
Man Law: Acts considered homsexeual shall be reserved for the job site, such as frivilous ass grabbing or pelvic thrusts to the facial area of an unsuspecting male who might be bent over in front of said man, and not directed toward male friends who don't work with said man. | |
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| Man Law
Posted: 8/26/2009 8:44:03 PM |
Man Law: Acts considered homsexeual shall be reserved for the job site, such as frivilous ass grabbing or pelvic thrusts to the facial area of an unsuspecting male who might be bent over in front of said man, and not directed toward male friends who don't work with said man.
Hey, don't we get to vote on some of these? I mean - any time I hear the words "pelvic thrusts to the facial area of an unsuspecting male" - It had frickin better be a woman doing the pelvic thrusting. You "men" that are floating a little too close to te flame don't exactly speak for us all - OK? | |
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.....Now, all I have to show for it is Jock itch and nobody ever gave me a "Card" ! ~ 
~ 
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