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Show ALL Forums  > Ask A Guy  > 47 year old man still lives with parents?      Home login  
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 pennye
Joined: 8/6/2009
Msg: 1
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47 year old man still lives with parents?Page 1 of 1    
Okay guys,
Isn't there something really disfunctional about a guy who has lived with his parents since age 24 until now at 47? I feel like I am wasting my time because I don't think he will ever leave his parents. The sex is unbelievably good but that can't be the only reason to stay. Any help is greatly appreciated.
Thanks!
 blowmydoorsoff
Joined: 3/19/2009
Msg: 2
47 year old man still lives with parents?
Posted: 8/25/2009 9:01:50 AM
Help ? Your getting "unbelievably" good sex, quit bytching !!! Az long az he doesnt ask hiz parents to watch and/or join in, enjoy the ride. :D
 Thesumofallparts
Joined: 4/5/2009
Msg: 3
47 year old man still lives with parents?
Posted: 8/25/2009 9:03:52 AM
He's not independent, and he'll never leave. He will live there after they die.
Also, he will drastically change when they die, or especially when his mother dies. Be ready for his personality and demeanor toward you to change very much. Exactly what aspects of his personality and demeanor toward you will change is hard to say...
Staying with someone for sex only is a mistake that will end badly for you and/or him at some point.
47 year old man still lives with parents?
Posted: 8/25/2009 9:04:56 AM
I knew a guy like this in his 30s...had a good job and all, but ultimately, it was the parents that wanted him out....so if the parents want him around that probably is not a bad thing
 wolftrain
Joined: 1/21/2007
Msg: 5
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47 year old man still lives with parents?
Posted: 8/25/2009 9:06:21 AM
question does he have a job, and have you asked him why he lives at home.
 DemonDingleBerry
Joined: 6/7/2009
Msg: 6
47 year old man still lives with parents?
Posted: 8/25/2009 9:06:26 AM
Not really sure. Maybe I am reading this wrong.


a guy who has lived with his parents since age 24 until now at 47?

Maybe he is catching up on lost time for when he was born until he was 24? I mean that's 24 years without knowing his parents.

Maybe he is a special needs kid?

What do you have a problem with? That he lives with his parents? Or that you don't appreciate his personality?

Which is more important to you in the relationship? Him living with his parents, or how he treats you and where you are in the relationship?

Are you trying to get him to be who you want him to be rather than seeing him for who he is?


Any help is greatly appreciated.

........you want the local apartment for rent ads?
 1kindMan4U
Joined: 5/23/2007
Msg: 7
47 year old man still lives with parents?
Posted: 8/25/2009 9:08:28 AM
It isnt dysfunctional TO HIM.

When you say "wasting my time", Ask yourself what your GOAL is. If it's to have "unbelievably good sex" then you are accomplishing that goal. At your age, what is your goal? If it involves moving in with the man you have good sex with, figure out if you could live with him and his parents. THAT is where he is, and is going to be.

Now that you KNOW that.. make an adult decision. It's really that simple
 farceur
Joined: 5/3/2009
Msg: 8
47 year old man still lives with parents?
Posted: 8/25/2009 9:16:41 AM
First, I'd start by finding out if the only reason the sex is that good is because you get a thrill from knowing his parents can hear everything from the next room. Try closing the door next time and see if that affects your sexual experience. Next, I'd just ask him to move out and see what he says. He might be ready. Third, sit down with his mother, ask her what all she does for her son around the house, make a list and then later when you talk to your guy explain that everything on that list is what he can expect you will never provide him. Judge then by his facial expression whether he seems to anticipate liberation or doom. Finally, his folks must be getting on and so a quick calculation of how many years they will still be in the picture can give you a rough idea of the price you'd pay for the wonderful sex, so, maybe it would be worth it, assuming average actuarial lifespans. I know that in our culture the big idea is to reduce family to the smallest possible unit, ideally a single parent with an only child, but it hasn't been that long since everyone used to live together anyway, and some places in the world, they still do. Making assumptions can be fun, especially if they are negative about others and self-promoting at the same time, but it might be better to take stock objectively and look to see what, if any, real problem there is in a particular situation. Like, don't they get the premium cable channels? That's what I would be concerned about.
 SassySky
Joined: 9/26/2008
Msg: 9
47 year old man still lives with parents?
Posted: 8/25/2009 9:41:34 AM

Isn't there something really disfunctional about a guy who has lived with his parents

Why doe this have to by dysfunctional in a lot of cultures this is totally normal, since you don't like it. That doesn't cut it I am frankly surprised as an educator you would come up with this w/o a lot of facts to back it up.


I feel like I am wasting my time

Then don't waste your time, when we get to the age we are, IMO we should know better since if you are wasting "your" time, then you "are wasting his".


The sex is unbelievably good but that can't be the only reason to stay

I dont' know I read out here almost every day that is as good of a reason and not to stay with someone. Only you can decide this. Also he must not be tied to his parents all that much if he is able to satisfy you in this department.


Any help is greatly appreciated.

I think for me, I would resent that someone I am sleeping with comes out on a public forums and talk about this instead of talking to ME..


Here is some details that somehow didn't come through in your OP
Is he an only child
Has he ever been married.
Is he helping out elderly parents without stripping them of their independence.
Are you really clear on the family dynamics.

My advice sit down and talk to him or just cut him loose so he can find someone that will be more open to his lifestyle.

Good luck
 bking3
Joined: 7/7/2009
Msg: 10
47 year old man still lives with parents?
Posted: 8/25/2009 9:46:00 AM
He sounds like my Aunt, Uncle and all of my effed up cousins... just moochin off the grandparents waiting for them to pass on so they can mooch the house and everything in it. This guy sounds like a loser, I'm 21 and I've already accomplished more in life than he has...
 GGSN
Joined: 6/13/2009
Msg: 11
47 year old man still lives with parents?
Posted: 8/25/2009 9:50:10 AM
Holy crap, I can't imagine living with my parents. That would be a freakin' nightmare. That's seriously screwed up. At some point, definitely by your early 20's, you need your own space.

Sure, sometimes bad things happen, and you need to fall back on family and friends for help, but this isn't a few months thing here. He's been living with them pretty much his entire life. That's just creepy.
 slybandit
Joined: 7/10/2006
Msg: 12
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47 year old man still lives with parents?
Posted: 8/25/2009 9:52:32 AM
Help?
http://madison.craigslist.org/apa/

Have you considered asking him if he'll want to move in with you? Free rent may just be his priority in life, who knows.
 blowmydoorsoff
Joined: 3/19/2009
Msg: 13
47 year old man still lives with parents?
Posted: 8/25/2009 9:56:06 AM
Have no idea, exactly why Im adding to this. But iz this person chinese ? Some cultures have different perceptions of the topic of this thread. Also some of these same cultures have unisex public restrooms. American women, would no doubt be horrified, american men, would no doubt spend more time in public restrooms.
 NORTY01
Joined: 10/5/2008
Msg: 14
47 year old man still lives with parents?
Posted: 8/25/2009 10:10:44 AM
If he's 47, then his parents are most likely elderly. They may require assistance. I'm fortunate to be 3 blocks from my 91 year old mom...
 originalNw
Joined: 11/7/2006
Msg: 15
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47 year old man still lives with parents?
Posted: 8/25/2009 10:48:04 AM
If you are just with him for the "sex partner ", then you should have "no complants ". His living arrangements is up front and open. He found his dream site to be in. It would sound weird,but is he taking care of his parents?. Is he "a care-giver "? Most people have grown away from living with their parents,because of their social actities with the ladies,work,ect...! It not uncommon to hear now a days parents letting their children and their family move back in,to help out around the house with bills and such. But your B/F has been doing this for 23 yrs. Are you sure he's mentally stable ???


 JP1111
Joined: 4/13/2008
Msg: 16
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47 year old man still lives with parents?
Posted: 8/25/2009 11:00:29 AM
Simply look at what it is you want to share with him in the longer run. If you’d like to get married, have children and move in together, he may very well not be what you are looking for. But if it’s just sex you’re after, what’s the problem?
 AlwaysExpectMiracles
Joined: 5/14/2009
Msg: 17
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47 year old man still lives with parents?
Posted: 8/25/2009 3:17:24 PM
Does he have a job or some other sourse of income? If yes - I don't see why is it such a big deal. It's unusual, but hey it's convenient.
Do you like anything else about the guy besides sex?
If you do - turn things in such a way that he moves in with you.
 artisticfreespirit
Joined: 6/4/2009
Msg: 18
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47 year old man still lives with parents?
Posted: 8/25/2009 3:29:33 PM
What happens when he cant get it up any longer?
Then he has nothing to offer you.
Is this what you want from a man? Nothing?
You can do better that this, don't you know that?
 Manwich2009
Joined: 5/11/2009
Msg: 19
47 year old man still lives with parents?
Posted: 8/25/2009 3:30:50 PM
According to your profile, you're 54 with a master's degree....and you can't figure this out ?

You're a booty call.....that's it !

What do you care where he live's...as long as he's around to deliver his sausage ?
 De-kay
Joined: 6/7/2009
Msg: 20
47 year old man still lives with parents?
Posted: 8/25/2009 3:54:25 PM
He might be looking after them, He might not want to spend all his hard earned cash on rent and council tax, He might not like living alone, He might not like cleaning up, how big is his parents home is a a 2 bed terraced or a 7 bed mansion you didnt say, altough i moved out of my parent home at 18 im 29 now if my companys failed and i was struggleing fianancially i would go back to my parents in a shot and be very welcome and wouldnt care at all about "living at home with parents" as there home sits in a 3 acre complex with 6 bedrooms 3 living rooms and so on so really id be happy to live there with mums cooking, no bills, rent free, all washing and cleaning done for life so think about that side of it hahaha !
 FLNY1
Joined: 8/11/2009
Msg: 21
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47 year old man still lives with parents?
Posted: 8/25/2009 5:35:49 PM
NOTHINGS WRONG WITH THAT MAYBE HIS PARENTS ARE ELDERLY AND SICK AND NEEDS TO HELP THEM , THE WAY THE COUNTRIES ECONOMY IS ITS NOT UNUSUAL FOR KIDS TO RETURN HOME.ALSO REMEMBER THAT FAMILY COURTS AWARD SOOOO MUCH MONEY FOR CHILD SUPPORT & THINGS THAT IT IS IMPOSSIBLE TO EVEN LIVE COMFORTABLY UNLESS YOU HAVE HELP.
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