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Posted: 8/26/2009 3:28:55 PM | I have no idea if this is appropriate to post here. I apologise if it is not. I am hoping someone can offer suggestions.
I have developed a wonderful friendship with a lady online. Strictly platonic but truly a beloved friend. Today she left a message in my inbox telling me she planned on deleting her account but wanted to maintain contact. She left me her e-mail address . I didn't write it down as I thought her message would remain stored in my inbox. A couple of hours later I looked for it in my inbox. Because her membership had been deleted her message containing e-mail address was deleted.
Result. I have lost contact with a most valued friend. Also, eventually she will wonder if our friendship meant nothing to me when she doesn't receive an e-mail. I could not begin to tell you how much I am upset about this.
Any suggestions would be appreciated more than words can express. I truly appreciate your taking the time to read this and once again apologise if I have posted in the wrong forum etc etc.
Samuel | |
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Posted: 8/26/2009 3:34:00 PM | | she knows she can find you on here!!! dont worry about it....... | |
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Posted: 8/26/2009 3:36:45 PM | Wow this is a tragedy.
Two people destined for a lifetime together, and it is not to be.
All because of software designed in such a way that messages go * poof * when an account is deleted.
Sad. | |
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Posted: 8/26/2009 3:37:33 PM | | I agree with message 2....she knows where she can find you....where there is a will, there's a way | |
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Posted: 8/26/2009 3:37:35 PM | Check again. Last time someone I'd been corresponding with deleted his account, I still had the messages - but the username next to them no longer appeared since it was no longer in use. So you may be looking past it.
That was before a couple of recent site changes, though; if this is one of them, that they now remove all e-mails sent from deleted accounts, then I'm very sorry, I do not think there is anything you can do.
Editing to add:
The "Help" section says:
1. If you see a blank user name in your account that means the user has deleted themselves.
2. If the user has completely vanished along with all messages that means they were deleted by the system.
http://www.plentyoffish.com/faq.aspx#7
Could be that needs updating, but, if it's presently accurate, and your friend did indeed delete herself, then the e-mail should still be there, just minus her former username. | |
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Posted: 8/26/2009 3:39:45 PM | | try searching in your history, if you find her name there click on message history. There is a slim chance you will find it there. Another option is to change your title to "Lisa I lost your email, please write me" - given her name is Lisa. Sounds a bit extreme but she may come back to look at your profile later and see it. Might creep some other users who like to read into stuff. | |
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Posted: 8/26/2009 3:43:17 PM | I hear the strains of Michael LeGrands "The Summer Knows" and "Hold Tight" by The Andrews Sisters softly wafting down the beach. The beach cottage door squeaks open, and creaks closed with a wind-driven bang.
"SUMMER OF '42"....what a tragedy.
She didn't go to war, but they were ever thence apart...
man, gotta put them numbers on your iphone! IMMEDIATELY! | |
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Posted: 8/26/2009 3:45:46 PM | Because she closed her account, it does not mean she can't come search/read.
You can put it in your profile.. a statement to her.. in case she does come search/read.
Starting a thread for her.. will get deleted. Against the rules. | |
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Posted: 8/26/2009 3:46:36 PM | | if she's a close friend then she'll write to you which will give you her address | |
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Posted: 8/26/2009 3:48:02 PM | | What a tragedy ... I hope that you find a way to get her email. I hate when things like this happen. Good luck! | |
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Posted: 8/26/2009 3:56:12 PM | could you write to te admin and plead for your old emails with her to be reinstated, or at lest sent directly to your email address?
am new on here so not sure how helpful this would be | |
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Posted: 8/26/2009 4:02:19 PM | :yay:
OP - I am very happy that things have worked out for you!! :) ..
Good Luck! | |
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Posted: 8/26/2009 4:07:33 PM | | If you haven't shut your computer down since that exchange, try repeatedly hitting your "back" button several times. The page with her email might still be cached in your computer. Hope that works for you. | |
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Posted: 8/26/2009 4:11:48 PM | GREAT news. I thought the message was deleted. In fact, it was only the username which was deleted. I now have the e-mail address and YES I have written it down safely. Really appreciate all the responses. Am now happy beyond words. I was so concerned she would have thought I was indifferent when I made no further contact.
" Indifference is the essence of inhumanity "
There are absolutely no romantic notions to the friendship but that does not mean it was not an issue of the heart.
" All's well that ends well "
Thank you, thank you, thank you for caring.
Samuel | |
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Posted: 8/26/2009 4:12:58 PM | Solution
Addin your profile a note for her and type your e-mail address. You may want to create an alternative one that doesn't show your real name. She may see it and write to you. | |
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Posted: 8/26/2009 4:16:44 PM | * Sniff *
I'm a sucker for happy endings
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Posted: 8/26/2009 4:33:33 PM | | That's too bad....I would contact the admin on this site and see if there is any way to retrieve messages. The idea regarding hitting the back button might work as well; provided that you have not turned off your puter since reading her email. | |
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Posted: 8/26/2009 4:51:42 PM | Samuel..if your relationship has progressed to a beloved friend then you know here name and where she lives.
Go find her. | |
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Posted: 8/26/2009 5:01:33 PM |
Fabio - DUDE! This sucks wind. You've lost contact with your most valued friend that you've never met. That's all I got. See ya at church.
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Posted: 8/26/2009 5:42:07 PM | Initially I thought this heartfelt tale of email address lost and email address found, left me with a feeling of fulfillment. It turned out to be just gas.......  | |
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Posted: 8/26/2009 5:55:12 PM | | I'm glad I could help. What did I do? Anyway, you're welcome. In the grand scheme of things I will count this unintended mitzvah as making up for whatever I might have done at sometime without realizing it, that I probably shouldn't have. Life seeks balance. | |
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Posted: 8/26/2009 6:03:34 PM | Samuel.
On you end there is nothing for you to do but to add to your profile a note to "x" saying to contact you asap as you forgot the address.
And if she valued your friendship, after a period of silence she will look you up where she knows where to find you and see the message.
Didn't you gave her your e-mail address when she has given hers to you? tut tut! tut!
Now simply wait and cross fingers.
I find it a but weird thought; has I have messages still in my inbox from people who has deleted their account and they didn't disappeared. | |
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Posted: 8/26/2009 6:58:33 PM | | Hray! Glad it worked out. | |
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Posted: 8/26/2009 7:21:29 PM | How nice to read a happy story at the end of a long day.
Namaste. | |
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Posted: 8/26/2009 7:29:37 PM | Ummm anyone I'm a "great friend" with here, I already know everything about, like their email, msn, phone number.
My question to you would be "Is this what you consider great friendship?" Constant contact through PoF emailing system? | |
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