| First meet at home
Posted: 9/12/2009 3:19:22 AM | Can someone explain to me as to why most guys only want to meet for the first date at my home address with takeaway and bottle of plonk rather than going out on a proper date?
Is this the norm these days as it is completely alien to me, call me old school but is this the right way we should be going about dating these days as I would never dream of giving such personal details to complete strangers?
Answers from both sides would be appreciated. | |
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| First meet at home
Posted: 9/12/2009 3:25:15 AM | Cos they dont really want to date you or anyone...all they want is a shag for free.
I am in total agreement with you...they all want to come to your house for a night 'in'
Remember a man will push it as far as you allow him to...so if you agree to inviting a total stranger from the internet to your house for a first (or subsequent few) meetings have your wits about you.
Personally its a no from me. Say no, then if they are genuine they will suggest somewhere else for a 'proper' date...
Lots here are looking for the physical only, hardly any for romance etc
My sister is here too and a couple of friends and we have all commented on this.
Tell 'em to do one. | |
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| First meet at home
Posted: 9/12/2009 3:26:54 AM | Did they not even offer to bring a DVD? cheapskates!
Guys that want to come round to yours on a first meet are just looking to get their leg over (although no doubt endless guys will come and say differently).
Edit: Redundant subject? I did a search, I can't find anything, perhaps those putting it up for deletion could provide the link? | |
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| First meet at home
Posted: 9/12/2009 3:31:34 AM | | They are either after one thing or don't want to be seen out with you. | |
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| First meet at home
Posted: 9/12/2009 3:32:25 AM | Perhaps if the OP put what she wanted for a first date on her profile it would weed out those who wanted the night on the couch.
I wouldn't even consider letting anyone into my home, or going into theirs on a first date. | |
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| First meet at home
Posted: 9/12/2009 3:35:40 AM | are just looking to get their leg over, although no doubt endless guys will come and say differently
Absolutely......In these credit crunched times, going to her place saves a few bob and if theres sex to be had, who are we to refuse such kindly offers? Sex aint cheap, i'm not sure on the cost of a prostitute these days, but i bet its more than the price of 2 bags of chips and 2 cans of coke!
I've been invited to a Womans home on the first meet, more than once....
How very dare they assume they'll be getting free sex from me without so much as a meal & maybe flowers beforehand!! I like to be treated with chocolates often as well...
Seriously though. I cant bring myself to meet Women online anymore.......The Gentleman in me cannot allow her to travel home alone if she doesnt drive, particularly at night....When she's out with me, it's my responsibility to ensure she arrives home to her front door safely. It's ruined many a budding relationship.......But i dont care to be honest, but thats probably a whole 'nother thread. | |
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| First meet at home
Posted: 9/12/2009 3:35:40 AM | yeah agree, stop chatting to tight arses!!! even if he is a decent guy it doesnt bode well for the future does it unless you want a life of staying in, sofas and lambrini.
also, if you have kids, would you really want a random coming into their enviroment | |
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| First meet at home
Posted: 9/12/2009 3:38:51 AM | I personally would never expect to be given someones personal address or indeed ask for it and nor would I give my details out on a first date!!
You are not old school at all OP and I would not let anyone tell you otherwise.
Practice safe dating everytime for your own protection as well as your families or whoever lives with you !! | |
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| First meet at home
Posted: 9/12/2009 3:44:26 AM | Can someone explain to me as to why most guys only want to meet for the first date at my home address with takeaway and bottle of plonk rather than going out on a proper date?
Is this the norm these days as it is completely alien to me, call me old school but is this the right way we should be going about dating these days as I would never dream of giving such personal details to complete strangers?
Forgive my bluntness, but if you seriously don't know the answer to this, I honestly hope you are more internet dating savvy than how your post comes across.
Be very careful with online dating and never give your address to someone until you have seen him several times and only when you trust him.
Never give your home phone number either - only a mobile number which you can change if things become awkward.
Never give the details of the location of your work either.
You have to be very careful to protect yourself and any family you have from the weirdos that are online. You think I am exaggerating - no - not at all. Better to be safe than sorry. | |
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| First meet at home
Posted: 9/12/2009 3:50:21 AM | | That is so wrong of a bloke to suggest a first date at your house. A first date should be on nutural ground where both parties feel comfortable and both can make an easy escape if needs be. In my opinion if a bloke suggested my house for a first date he is not worth dating! | |
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sjxx
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Joined: 8/27/2009
Msg: 11 | |
| First meet at home
Posted: 9/12/2009 3:54:59 AM | I agree with everyone else. This is not a good sign. This has been suggested to me by a few guys in the past and they have all turned out to be either married or living with someone and just fancied a bit on the side. I never allow a guy to come to my house unless I have had a few dates with him first and I would feel the same about that if I didnt have my daughters to think of. Too bloody risky. If he doesnt want to take you out in public where other people can see you then tell him to feck off. Guys that suggest this sort of stuff are losers  | |
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| First meet at home
Posted: 9/12/2009 3:56:33 AM | | Women are guilty of it too.A few times women have invited me round theres for a 'coffee' and a chat as they can't get a babysitter sorted to go out on a proper date. | |
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| First meet at home
Posted: 9/12/2009 3:59:21 AM | I don't think women should ever agree to let a man visit their home on a first date.
If the guy won't meet somewhere local like down the pub or a bar look for someone else!
There are thousands of guys on here who would love the chance to go out on a date etc. | |
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| First meet at home
Posted: 9/12/2009 4:05:44 AM | first off... is anyone really crazy enough to let some random tinterweb person come to their home like that? he could turn up with his favorite pet axe for all you know lol.
there could be legitimate reasons - maybe he wants to meet you but is skint, maybe you've put in your profile that you like quiet nights in with a bottle and a film (I bet 99% of you have too!) and hes taken that a bit too literally.
other than that, he just wants his end away lol | |
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| First meet at home
Posted: 9/12/2009 4:07:42 AM | Women are guilty of it too.A few times women have invited me round theres for a 'coffee' and a chat as they can't get a babysitter sorted to go out on a proper date.
I notice you put coffee between apostrophes. So you are saying that women are inviting men over whom they have met over the internet, for a first meeting offering them sex whilst children are in the house. I guess they are simply prostitutes wanting to be paid. | |
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| First meet at home
Posted: 9/12/2009 4:08:09 AM | You'd hope that two people meeting for the very first time would meet in a public place regardless of whether they are male/female/combination etc
You'd have to question someones motives if they wanted to meet at their own home let alone yours. | |
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| First meet at home
Posted: 9/12/2009 4:19:36 AM | | I cant belive people would wanna do that for a first date! I'd always expect to meet at a public place, this safe guards both parties! | |
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| First meet at home
Posted: 9/12/2009 6:25:44 AM | Its never a good thing to let a date know where you live until your really sure that you are going somewhere with them, you have absolutely no idea who they are or what theyre like until you meet them, if you do that at home and they turn out to be a complete twat, you cant climb out of your own bog window, and if they are the stalker type at least if you meet for a coffee they can only stalk you as far as the coffe shop!
It would be a great plan for a burglar to have your address and ask you out on a second date, then have your plasma away while your stood on your own outside the pizza hut, wondering where your date is.
Use your loaf, meet in public and stay safe! | |
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| First meet at home
Posted: 9/12/2009 6:30:10 AM | I'm with the majority here.
Meeting a stranger from an internet dating site at your home is not only silly it is potentially dangerous.
Don't do it. Ever. | |
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| First meet at home
Posted: 9/12/2009 6:30:46 AM | | Meeting in your own home for the first date is just dumb. First of all, you don't know the person and having a psycho to know where you like...not good. Also, first dates should always be on neutral and equal ground, its the best for both partners, I would never meet somewhere else. | |
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| First meet at home
Posted: 9/12/2009 6:39:31 AM | If I agree to date anyone from the Internet I would not agree to go to someone's home or invite them to mine on a third of fourth date to be honest!!!
Neither would I provide them with any information that would enable them to just turn up that happened to a friend of mine and the proposed date decided to try and climb into the front room window but that's another story....
I am sorry but unlike normal dating where you may have friends in common live very close to each other work together etc etc you know a persons history..... You know NOTHING about someone from the internet and in order to find out the truth which can be scant at the best of times you need to wait and only meet in public for the first few dates..... | |
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| First meet at home
Posted: 9/12/2009 6:48:08 AM | some people say that they have a good job,and are full of banter..
but they carnt even buy a glass of coke, they are that skint......................."hey guess what"!!!!! lets go around your house......you must have some drink.....
leg me leg over,if i play me cards right.... | |
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| First meet at home
Posted: 9/12/2009 6:49:07 AM | I have collected women from their homes for a first date. But never in a million years would I suggest a bottle of plonk and a takeaway at their place on a first date - it smacks of an assumption of sex. Besides which, if you bore each other silly or the chemistry is so so bad - it's a bit more difficult to end the date without being very impolite.
Having said that - I've been invited in for a glass or a coffee whilst my '1st date' got ready and it was all relaxed and pleasant; maybe because I left my 'Axe Murderer' hatchet in the car? | |
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| First meet at home
Posted: 9/12/2009 7:18:39 AM |
first off... is anyone really crazy enough to let some random tinterweb person come to their home like that?
I know a guy who brings his young kids to early dates.
And I would never have a full first date at mine! My landlady wouldn't like it! :ob | |
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| First meet at home
Posted: 9/12/2009 7:20:21 AM | Although I agree with everyone here I would like to add another view point to see if anyone else can see the difference.........
A lot of people will go out drinking on a Saturday night and have a 1 night stand with a complete stranger some will be blind drunk but some will do it just because they can or want to etc. Some (not all if the pavement next to my work place goes by anything) will happen in one of the peoples houses.
They may have known this person 5 minutes.
How is this any different apart from the fact drink is involved so lessoning the senses? | |
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