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Show ALL Forums  > Over 30  > Where to meet people that are "datable" over 30?      Home login  
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 leslieannec
Joined: 9/4/2009
Msg: 1
Where to meet people that are "datable" over 30?Page 1 of 4    (1, 2, 3, 4)
So, I'm trying the whole online thing and was wondering what you all think about where to meet people in person when you're over 30. I find the bar scene really annoying because everyone is 22 and looking for a party. It seems like all of the men that I meet are either married or gay, and I'm curious as to where the over 30 singles who aren't loaded with issues are (those ones are easy to find!).

If you have any idea where to meet them specifically in Boston, that would be even better. :)
 caninechum
Joined: 12/18/2007
Msg: 2
Where to meet people that are datable over 30?
Posted: 9/14/2009 7:20:03 PM
Aren't there any POF meets in your area?
 Stafford_Jim
Joined: 8/12/2009
Msg: 3
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Where to meet people that are datable over 30?
Posted: 9/14/2009 7:26:31 PM
I wish I knew myself where to meet dateable singles.

We're all too old for the bars and clubs, we're out of school, that doesn't leave many options does it?

I guess that leaves church, I'm not a religious fella though so I'm at a loss. I've been in long term relationships all my adult life, so years go by between my dating opportunities.

If you figure it out, please share it with the rest of us in similar circumstances.
 leslieannec
Joined: 9/4/2009
Msg: 4
Where to meet people that are datable over 30?
Posted: 9/14/2009 7:27:44 PM
As I said, I'm brand new, so maybe. I will say though that I've been to some "singles" events and they have been downright frightening. I'm not usually easily scared, and can completely hold my own in almost any venue, but at those things it's like a feeding frenzy. I'm looking for more of a "normal" environment than a "dating" venue.
 leslieannec
Joined: 9/4/2009
Msg: 5
Where to meet people that are datable over 30?
Posted: 9/14/2009 7:29:16 PM
Hey Jim,
Yeah, I am totally into the church scene and still have no success!

Best wishes!
 sammylg
Joined: 12/20/2006
Msg: 6
Where to meet people that are datable over 30?
Posted: 9/14/2009 7:31:08 PM
I thought being from Boston, there would be a ton of available single, professional men there.

If you think you have it bad, try coming to KC where everyone marries by 24!
 caninechum
Joined: 12/18/2007
Msg: 7
Where to meet people that are datable over 30?
Posted: 9/14/2009 7:37:38 PM
I've no clue what the POF events are like in the States, but I've been to two in the UK and the atmosphere seemed relaxed to me.
 Steve2600
Joined: 1/9/2008
Msg: 8
Where to meet people that are datable over 30?
Posted: 9/14/2009 7:43:15 PM
My buddy went to a POF get together here in Dallas and said it there was alot of people but everyone was older (35 -50) , and as he described it, (well, I wont repeat what he said, too politically incorrect to say here), but lets just say that no one appealed to him.
 Einstein09
Joined: 7/12/2009
Msg: 9
Where to meet people that are datable over 30?
Posted: 9/14/2009 8:06:06 PM
In Austin, the local chapter of www.meetin.org is a great group of people. If there's one in your city I'd check it out.
 1kindMan4U
Joined: 5/23/2007
Msg: 10
Where to meet people that are datable over 30?
Posted: 9/14/2009 8:11:23 PM
Is your question "Where do I suggest as a meeting place for a first IN PERSON meeting after contact is made on POF or some other online site?"

If that's your question.. The answer is.. some place YOU want, where YOU will be the most comfortable meeting someone for the first time. A PLACE of YOUR choosing.

If your question is a Location to go hang out in a meat market.. sorry, I dont know boston. ANY "looks-based Hey-baby place" will work. Your sexiness and your body will attract the WHO that likes how you LOOK.

Remember, out in public.. ALL a guy knows is whether he wants to DO you or not.

If he comes up to you and says HELLO. It's because he has decided you are doable. He isnt coming up to you to inquire what you think about the economy. Not by a long shot.

Edit: just read the rest of the posts.. "The church scene" Same scenario.. ANY guy who comes over to you is NOT thinking.. "I wonder if she follows the bible like I do"

He is wondering, "I wonder if she is SO religious that I'll have to MARRY her before I can boink her" That's a fact.
 leslieannec
Joined: 9/4/2009
Msg: 11
Where to meet people that are datable over 30?
Posted: 9/14/2009 8:34:59 PM
Thanks for your reply. I meant more like, where can I meet people in person rather than online.

You really think they are all like that? Why is it that if I go up to a guy at a bar it's not the same thing then? If I approach someone at a bar or wherever, it's because I find them physically attractive and want to find out if they are intellectually interesting as well. I will admit that I do need to be physically attracted to someone before I am interested in dating them, but not that I want to "do" them upon first sight.

As for church, I really don't know if that's true. Of course it must be in some cases, but I've met men who are just as dedicated to their faith as women.
 guyd42
Joined: 10/13/2008
Msg: 12
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Where to meet people that are datable over 30?
Posted: 9/14/2009 9:21:31 PM
"Where to meet people that are "datable" over 30?"

You're at the right place!
 gr1970
Joined: 9/4/2009
Msg: 13
Where to meet people that are datable over 30?
Posted: 9/14/2009 9:42:43 PM
Fixed - "Where to meet people that are "dateable" over 30?

"You're at the right place!"

My thoughts? Absolutely not. I've had my account since Sept 4th and I've already had my fill. No thank you.
 brynn005
Joined: 9/14/2008
Msg: 14
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Where to meet people that are datable over 30?
Posted: 9/14/2009 9:48:12 PM
For what it's worth, I've read about an event called a 'Lock and key' event'. It's not a very 'natural' setting, but something you might want to consider anyway. Basically, you go to this meeting and all the men have keys. All the women have locks. When you go in, you get a lock (since you're a woman) then you go find a guy who's key will unlock your lock. It's supposed to be a 'fun' way to meet people. Anyway, just something different that sounded interesting to me. You might want to loook to see if Boston has any of those. Just google lockandkey.com. The article said this kind of thing probably works better if you're outgoing, which I'm usually not when first meeting someone.

Another event I read about it's one called IJL.. It's Just Lunch. Again, you could google it as itsjustlunch.com.
 caninechum
Joined: 12/18/2007
Msg: 15
Where to meet people that are datable over 30?
Posted: 9/14/2009 10:25:16 PM

My thoughts? Absolutely not. I've had my account since Sept 4th and I've already had my fill. No thank you.

You're giving up on the site after only 11 days? I've spent longer than that looking for a used car!
 Husbandman
Joined: 3/1/2009
Msg: 16
Where to meet people that are datable over 30?
Posted: 9/14/2009 11:09:46 PM
Where to meet people that are datable over 30?

Well how would you define datable?

Datable people over 30, are all over the place, the laundry mat, grocery store ect... some may be right in front of you but you'd look right past them because they don't have those certain things that popular culture/ society says we should have by the time we reach 30, like a college degree or a house, a car, kids, a wedding ring...

The ones who do have it all together "so to speak" but have stayed single beyond 30 are making good money and traveling... Or going out to the most exclusive clubs and events...
 gnr8nrg
Joined: 4/22/2007
Msg: 17
Where to meet people that are datable over 30?
Posted: 9/15/2009 12:04:43 AM
I get introduced to friends of friends. I became a regular invite at dinner parties and it was almost comical because some people think we should all be in relationships because they are.
Work always has single people, but if it doesn't work out that can be a lot of drama.
Taking a night class or some kind of self help/improvment seminar would have an over 30 crowd and a topic of interest that could be discussed with someone we find attractive.
I see lots of women at the gym, but I don't approach them...I'm sweaty and not there to be social, but I see a lot of other people getting to know one another. So any hobby that interests you would be good. That way you enjoy it either way and that is always attractive.

As far as online dating...Chemistry is more important than we give it credit for. We can make a "net" connection only to have no spark when meeting. Also it's easy to give up on someone you barely know except from a few emails and phone calls when it's time to meet or if the first meeting doesn't go as expected. So don't have too many expectations and just enjoy it for what it is. That doesn't mean to "settle," keep your goals/outcomes in mind and just don't judge/expect what may happen until it does happen. Then maybe it'll all work out...Good Luck
 Devon1970
Joined: 9/3/2006
Msg: 18
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Where to meet people that are datable over 30?
Posted: 9/15/2009 4:55:55 AM
I agree with some of the comments here. I don't do online dating. I use the forums and that's about it. I can get a read or feel for someone seconds after I meet them or just from a visual glance. You can't get that on here.

I've chatted with people and then gone to meet them only to see them sitting there and realize before I even approach them, "Oh no, There is nothing there. No spark! Oh Well, I better go get this over with. " You then proceed to waste half an hour and then hope you can gradually let it go. If you're lucky you'll both realize it and just go through the motions and that's the end of it. The reverse can also be true. It's just too much of a time-waster.

I prefer meeting through friends and social gatherings. If your friends and relatives know that you're single then they're going to try and play matchmaker. My sister is always doing this. I think people enjoy doing it.
 dub08
Joined: 4/28/2007
Msg: 19
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Where to meet people that are datable over 30?
Posted: 9/15/2009 6:07:10 AM
Op if I knew that I wouldn't be sitting here typing this!
I always have to laugh when you folks say church - is that like a church group or is it actually mass on a Sunday because they are all over 60 at mass on a Sunday!
 leslieannec
Joined: 9/4/2009
Msg: 20
Where to meet people that are datable over 30?
Posted: 9/15/2009 8:00:46 AM
Thanks Dub08 - that made me smile. Not like, during the service, but like the people that you meet that go to your church, like in Bible study and such.

Eski-bro, so I've had this conversation before and it's always a firestarter. What's wrong with wanting "conventional"? I'm not saying that it's right to be closed-minded or prejudice, but when it comes to whom you choose to date or not, there isn't anything wrong with saying that you want certain things. Honestly, and I know this statement can cause a war, I don't believe in giving every Joe that comes along a chance. If I can tell right away that I'm not interested, why would I go there? For example, I am not comfortable dating someone that is shorter than I am. Is that based on looks? Absolutely. I know that it makes me uncomfortable and that I generally am not attracted to shorter men, so am I going to go on a date with someone who is 5'2"? Nope. Since we've mentioned the church thing, I also know that I am not interested in dating someone who does not believe in a higher being. (This isn't meant to be a religious thread, so bear with me.) I personally need to have that connection with someone if we are going to work out, so that does mean that I have to weed those who do not fit the profile off of my list. At the same time though, I realize that I am not every man's vision of datable, so I expect them to do the same. If they are looking for skinny blondes then I don't fit their image and I'm fine with that. You can really do the same thing with any category (education, looks, height, hair color, whatever) but if people know what they are and are not attracted to, then why should they misrepresent themselves by dating someone who does not have the qualities that they need to be happy in a relationship?
 guyd42
Joined: 10/13/2008
Msg: 21
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Where to meet people that are datable over 30?
Posted: 9/15/2009 8:10:51 AM
“My thoughts? Absolutely not. I've had my account since Sept 4th and I've already had my fill. No thank you.”

Hope you know I was being sarcastic...
 JayM1234
Joined: 5/21/2009
Msg: 22
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Where to meet people that are datable over 30?
Posted: 9/15/2009 8:25:57 AM
Well if I were you I would suggest looking in Cincinnati
 Threshold of Hope
Joined: 7/6/2009
Msg: 23
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Where to meet people that are datable over 30?
Posted: 9/15/2009 6:12:20 PM
Go to a World of Warcraft convention. The guys outnumber the gals by at least 2 to 1, and most of the guys are single and horny.
 Calientecutie
Joined: 4/5/2009
Msg: 24
Where to meet people that are datable over 30?
Posted: 9/15/2009 6:58:21 PM
volunteer at a place that you enjoy...go to church go to the gym...get involved in a class...just live your life and you will meet somebody...who knows? maybe you will meet somebody on this site...but do not hold your breath...there are too many weirdos
 leslieannec
Joined: 9/4/2009
Msg: 25
Where to meet people that are datable over 30?
Posted: 9/15/2009 7:40:05 PM
Yeah, I've had some interesting conversations with a few people, but I have had more way freakish emails come through. It's a little scary. I don't think there's anything in my profile that says, "please be a weirdo and send me sex emails," and yet...
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