| funny online dating profiles
Posted: 10/22/2004 1:20:44 PM | I stole these off the net--they are quite amusing -anyone have more I nned a good laugh?
Desperately lonely loser, SWM,32,miserable,apathetic, tired of tv and watching my roomates hair fall out. Seeks depressed, unattractive SWF, 25-32, no sense of humor, for long talks about the macabre.
or
SWM looking for blind female, any race or age. But of course blind people can't read-Fix me up with your friends.
or
Bitter, disillusioned SM recently rejected by longtime fiancee seeks decent, reliable woman, If such a thing exists in this cruel world of hatchet faced witches.
I like the last one --its funnylol | |
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| funny online dating profiles
Posted: 10/22/2004 1:34:16 PM | That last one made me laugh so hard, if it were a woman I'd write her once anyways! And that second one obviously doesn't know much about the internet... it's a way for many, MANY blind people to connect to the outside world (google screen readers if you're interested)
I haven't seen any nearly as funny as these, but now I really want to go looking... | |
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| funny online dating profiles
Posted: 10/22/2004 6:10:45 PM | | I once read one in the personals of The Lexington Herrald (Kentucky) of a guy that described himself as being over weight, lazy and loved to "shop at walmart". | |
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| funny online dating profiles
Posted: 10/22/2004 11:40:01 PM | | I like doing my ad that way because I like to make people laugh I recently changed my profile but for awhile it said occupation, Masterbater there was some other stuff I may change it again it,s fun and I like this site, people are cool. | |
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| funny online dating profiles
Posted: 10/22/2004 11:57:28 PM | Man... I dont know...
Im sure glad that I keep my profile here 100% on the serious side (*hint*). | |
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| funny online dating profiles
Posted: 10/23/2004 12:01:53 AM | Maybe I should just cut to the chase:
For my "Dating Interests" I have:
"toenail clipping, godzilla movies, camping in cemeteries,
underwater bowling, sightseeing of federal penitentiaries, holding up liquor stores,
mutual hate discussions, driving in reverse on the interstate, being spanked"
I guess Im lucky... 'cause so far I dont think anyone has mistaken my humor there. (yet!) | |
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| funny online dating profiles
Posted: 10/23/2004 12:31:06 AM | More stolen funny personals.....
Patriarch of up-and- coming religion seeks alter girl
..........................
You can lead a horticulture but you can't make her think. Single male farmer looking to teach some cowgirl the ropes.
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Frisky pup seeks some tail. Tired of going in circles. Lets catch up sometime--you can lead the way. | |
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| funny online dating profiles
Posted: 10/25/2004 8:24:03 PM | Here's another....
"good communicator
not much to say will find out when i communicate with someone" | |
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| funny online dating profiles
Posted: 11/7/2004 3:16:01 PM | | You have a wicked sense of humor. I like it. One of my own is " I'm into guys who can pay for their own meal." | |
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| funny online dating profiles
Posted: 11/7/2004 3:22:56 PM | | haha... those are hillarious. Jaded and pissed people can be morbidly funny at times. God bless them!!! Hahahaha | |
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WS6TA
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Joined: 4/26/2004
Msg: 13 | |
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| funny online dating profiles
Posted: 11/9/2004 5:54:56 AM | i could've shortened my ad to a bumper sticker i bought years ago and keep above my corkboard:
OBSESSIVE, COMPULSIVE, NEUROTIC, ANTI-SOCIAL, MANIC and PARANOID, but BASICALLY NORMAL
but it's better to let the demons out more slowly than all at once..  | |
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| funny online dating profiles
Posted: 11/9/2004 10:24:57 AM | | Break out of the tired old traditional male/female roles. I'll be the baby seagull and you feed me regurtitated raw fish like a nurturing momma bird. I'll provide the raw herring and vomit inducer, you bring the strap-on beak. No weirdos, please. | |
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| funny online dating profiles
Posted: 11/9/2004 10:34:48 AM | | Check out mine on loveaccess under nofubars or nopsychos.I got quite a few remarks from those. | |
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| funny online dating profiles
Posted: 11/9/2004 1:40:51 PM | I once had an ad headline that read: Bitter alcoholic seeks hard-core drug addict. I had more responses from that headline, I think, then any other headline. And no, none of the women who responded were hard-core drug addicts. At least I don't think do.
W | |
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| funny online dating profiles
Posted: 11/17/2004 4:21:33 PM | Occupation: Master baker
Seeking: Female companionship due to carpal tunnel syndrom. | |
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| funny online dating profiles
Posted: 11/25/2004 8:03:40 AM | | those are usually humorous guys, nice way to attract someone, i would definitely read that profile if i saw it, but one from a woman though | |
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| funny online dating profiles
Posted: 12/13/2004 2:49:59 AM | here's my contribution, which I cut n pasted from a local SA
dating site - and which is pretty much why I'm on an INTERNATIONAL
site, rather than local. (Its more sad than funny, but it gives
an inkling of the kind of headspace that's 'normal' here).
"I want to meet a nice man to settle down with, cook for and be looked after by. I am obedient and trustworthy and make the home look like a home.
The person must have a good hart and know how to treat a lady. He must be kind and need a lady in his live. If he look good as well I will be very happy."
Ouch. Is it just me, or does that feel like an ad right out of The Stepford Wives? | |
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| funny online dating profiles
Posted: 12/13/2004 1:46:06 PM | | Hold on is that Black Lab still up for sale ltltwirp. My dogs getting close to dieing, so I should be looking for a new pet. | |
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| funny online dating profiles
Posted: 12/13/2004 3:20:36 PM | | Itlwhip. I read that post and nearly spit my water all over my computer. That is classic!. I love labs! | |
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Grim76
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Joined: 9/15/2004
Msg: 24 | |
| funny online dating profiles
Posted: 12/13/2004 3:48:11 PM | | A profile titled "Crackwhores need love too" that I came across once still holds the title in my book. | |
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