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 quiero conocerte
Joined: 10/15/2007
Msg: 1
How soon after meeting a woman do men decide whether or not they want to see here again?Page 1 of 1    
I usually need to go out with a guy a few times before deciding whether or not I want to get involved romantically. However, more ofyen than not I never hear from guys again after the first date. Do they really decide that quickly?
 That Guy Him
Joined: 8/5/2009
Msg: 2
How soon after meeting a woman do men decide whether or not they want to see here again?
Posted: 10/1/2009 8:06:25 PM

However, more ofyen than not I never hear from guys again after the first date. Do they really decide that quickly?

Yes.
 rainman12
Joined: 10/18/2007
Msg: 3
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How soon after meeting a woman do men decide whether or not they want to see here again?
Posted: 10/1/2009 8:11:23 PM
I generally decide within 10 minutes whether or not I DON'T want to see them again...to decide to keep seeing them takes time, like each additional encounter...generally I will want to see you again unless there's something that comes up that turns me off for whatever reason, but I generally give people the benefit of the doubt until that time.
 RMSB
Joined: 9/26/2009
Msg: 4
How soon after meeting a woman do men decide whether or not they want to see here again?
Posted: 10/1/2009 8:11:36 PM
i will know in the first 2 min if i wanna see you again
 *Cowboy*
Joined: 4/28/2006
Msg: 5
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How soon after meeting a woman do men decide whether or not they want to see here again?
Posted: 10/1/2009 8:12:50 PM
I do first meets with a 30 minute time limit over a drink or two. I know THEN if I want another date. This isnt that hard. If your attracted and have stuff in common and she seemed fun then I am good for a real date which is much longer.

After that I for SURE know if another date is needed.

Cowboy
 SassySky
Joined: 9/26/2008
Msg: 6
How soon after meeting a woman do men decide whether or not they want to see here again?
Posted: 10/1/2009 8:21:11 PM
I guess for me and a lot of people I have met out here. A meeting is nothing more than a meet and greet putting a face to the person we have been chatting with via email, phone, text, webcam etc. That is the place to decide if we want to date.

I honestly, usually decide pretty quick if I want a second date. I have gone home thought about it and needed some things clarified that was stated.

When you aren't asked out on a second date, do you send an email thanking them for the nice time, closing with hope we do this again soon.

That lets the guy know you are interested?
 quiero conocerte
Joined: 10/15/2007
Msg: 7
How soon after meeting a woman do men decide whether or not they want to see here again?
Posted: 10/1/2009 8:33:13 PM
For me, the "meet and greet" usually isn't enough to decide. Unless, as a previous poster noted, I take an instant dislike to someone. So, I guess what I'm really wondering is, if you don't hear from someone and/or you send a follow-up e-mail to which the response is a polite "it was nice to meet you" and nothing more, does that mean that the person took an instant dislike to you? "cause it sure seems to happen a lot...
 JP1111
Joined: 4/13/2008
Msg: 8
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How soon after meeting a woman do men decide whether or not they want to see here again?
Posted: 10/1/2009 8:39:46 PM
Like women, some guys only need one date and some need more than just one.
How soon after meeting a woman do men decide whether or not they want to see here again?
Posted: 10/1/2009 8:44:09 PM
I can tell within a minute that I am extremely attracted to the woman enough to want to be in a relationship with her and can accept almost any problems she may have. I don't ask them out if I don't see myself with them in a LTR. What is a deal breaker when I go out with her is that she isn't interested in me enough to not lead me on and dump me latter and I can pick up the signs when she isn't that into me and has issues that will stop me from being in a relationship with her.
 stocktondon
Joined: 8/26/2009
Msg: 10
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How soon after meeting a woman do men decide whether or not they want to see here again?
Posted: 10/1/2009 8:48:57 PM
You can find a recent study reported online that guys who were not attracted look at you a little over 4 seconds, while those who are attracted spend over 8 seconds. another recently reported study says men falling in love at first sight in about the first 10 minutes.

First visual impressions are powerful and quick, at least for men, according to these reports.
 whenwillthiswork26
Joined: 11/13/2008
Msg: 11
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How soon after meeting a woman do men decide whether or not they want to see here again?
Posted: 10/1/2009 9:00:29 PM
I'm sure you've heard that men think with their ****'s.
Thats about it. And that happens almost immediately.
 christ on a crutch
Joined: 2/1/2009
Msg: 12
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How soon after meeting a woman do men decide whether or not they want to see here again?
Posted: 10/1/2009 11:56:53 PM

Like women, some guys only need one date and some need more than just one.

true that. amazing how widespread the application of that idea of individual differences. nothin short of amazing.

sometimes it takes a date or two to see the best part of a woman. (no, not THAT part. that takes three.) those where i've drawn a quick conclusion were always to the negative.

I'm sure you've heard that men think with their ****'s.
Thats about it. And that happens almost immediately.

everything about my **** works slowly, at least at first. i've yet to hear a complaint.
 Dusto79
Joined: 9/12/2008
Msg: 13
How soon after meeting a woman do men decide whether or not they want to see here again?
Posted: 10/2/2009 12:41:47 AM
For me a date can end in any of the three options:
1)not interested, probably couldn't wait for the date to end
2)kinda like them but don't feel the chemistry, I'll try one or two more dates to see if something sparks
3)can't wait to go out again

In other words it all depends. It's usually pretty obvious to most normal guys if a woman is interested or not, and it can mean the difference between whether we feel chemistry for her or not. If you aren't "into" the guys you date, because you like to take your time, they probably pick up on it and don't develop a spark themselves. Lots of people expect instant chemistry or they move on.

Edit: Just a small addition, if I decide I want to go out again I try to make the next date soon, sometimes even at the end of the first date. If a guy has to wait a few days he's definitely not feeling strong chemistry for you.
 Nerdhead26
Joined: 5/7/2009
Msg: 14
How soon after meeting a woman do men decide whether or not they want to see here again?
Posted: 10/2/2009 12:44:36 AM
in about 5 seconds. i can decide if i want to see them again or not. :)
to get involved romantically? ... hmm well that may take 2-4 more dates for me.
 jimmorrison4
Joined: 3/8/2009
Msg: 15
How soon after meeting a woman do men decide whether or not they want to see here again?
Posted: 10/2/2009 12:46:35 AM
For me, it's after I get home and have time to think about it. I've talked to, and been out with, girl who I thought I couldn't wait to see again when I was around them. Then, later on, or the next day, or whatever, I realized I had no interest. I can't decide on the spot if I like someone.
 infraradiant
Joined: 4/18/2009
Msg: 16
How soon after meeting a woman do men decide whether or not they want to see here again?
Posted: 10/2/2009 12:54:36 AM
It's about 30seconds....

NO really... seriously.

I pretty much ....KNOW. in about 30seconds.
 Rossjackson1985
Joined: 4/7/2009
Msg: 17
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How soon after meeting a woman do men decide whether or not they want to see here again?
Posted: 10/2/2009 1:47:28 AM
first couple of minutes.. sounds reasonable.. we aren't being shallow.. it is just how our minds work..
 Write Time
Joined: 12/29/2008
Msg: 18
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How soon after meeting a woman do men decide whether or not they want to see here again?
Posted: 10/2/2009 2:27:47 AM
Sure. Why not?

At the end of one date, it's pretty clear whether you want to share another. I can't think of any situation where I've needed time to think about that.

So, what do you think is the common thread -- if any -- with these guys who don't want to see you after the first date?
 mrskippy57
Joined: 4/27/2007
Msg: 19
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How soon after meeting a woman do men decide whether or not they want to see here again?
Posted: 10/2/2009 3:05:05 AM
I never use my first judgement about someone. And message 11 we men do think with our....minds
 Navigator6
Joined: 3/5/2008
Msg: 20
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How soon after meeting a woman do men decide whether or not they want to see here again?
Posted: 10/2/2009 3:40:00 AM

I'm sure you've heard that men think with their ****'s.
Thats about it. And that happens almost immediately.

Well, in my case she's right - I know almost immediately. However, it has NOTHING to do with my d!ck. The immediate part has to do w/chemistry & attraction. If we get passed that hurdle, that's when the real vetting begins.
 ron5000
Joined: 8/13/2008
Msg: 21
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How soon after meeting a woman do men decide whether or not they want to see here again?
Posted: 10/2/2009 4:26:23 AM
Well you have gotten comments from quite an age spectrum already but I will expand that, I am 62 and feel much the same as most of these younger guys.

I can decide if there is physical attraction within about 30 seconds. I always set first meetings so they can be ended within one hour. That gives enough time to determine if there is a mutual attraction and enough other than physical to warrant a second date.

Bottom line is that a negative decision can be quick, a real positive decision takes more time.
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