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Posted: 10/9/2009 9:38:06 AM | So, after taking all the suggestions that you guys have given me, I am still not receiving any responses! Why? Is it my pics? Are they too professional? Or is it just me?
I don't get it!
So, I'm asking anyone- male or female to give me some good and positive suggestions that will help me get some profile responses.
What has worked for you? Shall I perhaps keep it short and sweet, or like the other boring profiles?? Tell me what works...what attracts you to a profile?
Funny thing is, even when I've been emailing guys, they don't respond either. Makes me feel like I'm some ugly cow that no one wants to talk to. Pretty discouraging if I must say. =0(
So if anyone has suggestions how to email a guy too, that would be appreciated as well.
Thanks so much!! =0) | |
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Posted: 10/9/2009 9:46:52 AM | | I don't see the problem groovy...you sound just like what you look like - a young, cute, carefree California girl. Don't know why you are not deluged with emails. Sorry, I know that doesn't help much:( | |
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Posted: 10/9/2009 10:03:48 AM | HI GroovyFoxx…
You’re a beautiful and articulate woman, and if your profile isn’t working, I’d say do a total reincarnation.
1) Start with the name…it comes across as a hippie-slut (sorry) and your photos focus on bod vs brains.
2) Huntington Beach has a lot of classy guys. Get some classy pics in all kinds of garb….I’d nix the pink shirt….it shouts FUN and yet your profile says “no hookups”. You’re sending mixed messages with your name and photos vs. your words. He may see you as a Pr*ck Tease and avoid you entirely.
3) Nix super-hero as profession. A lot of guys are looking for a woman who is financially secure and with you he doesn’t know what to think. Well, yes he does, when he sees nothing, he clicks on to the next woman.
4) Talk about what you’re going to school for….classy guys like educated women.
5) NEVER say you’re not getting a response….you’re encouraging the “herd” mentality…i.e. he’ll figure if the other guys are avoiding you, he better do the same.
6) TONE down the sarcasm in the reincarnation…he can’t hear your tone of voice and you come on REALLY STRONG and dominant here and he doesn’t get to the nice hugs till he gets to the first date section…and he may not get that far.
7) Nix the “night” and “nighty night”…you’ve cut him off at the pass. Even if he’s not gonna get lucky, ya don’t have to hit him over the head with it here.
8) Same thing with “regret in the morning”….a guy can dream, can’t he?
9) You’ve also still got the “fellaS” thing going in your profile…this is a TURN off….ya need to make him think he’s the only FELLA reading your profile.
Hope that helps. DenverSky5280  | |
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Posted: 10/9/2009 10:05:33 AM | I don't know what the problem is, I like your profile. Maybe you're too specific in wanting a liberal tree-hugging non-religous no-red-meat guy?? I kind of doubt it though ... i'm none of those things and I'd respond in a second.
Maybe your pics are too posed? Perhaps guys think you're a scammer - or that you are just too good-looking for them to have a shot??
In any event, I wouldn't change your profile much, except maybe to lighten up a bit on the things you don't like.
As for emailing guys ... hard to say without seeing the letter. I respond better to a short email, which clearly expresses interest, with a reason why the girl is interested. That way I know she actually looked at my profile rather than just sending out random emails.
Sorry I couldn't help more :) | |
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Posted: 10/9/2009 10:07:41 AM |
I’d nix the pink shirt….it shouts FUN and yet your profile says “no hookups”.
I have no idea what you're talking about on this one, DS. None of her pics shout "hookup" to me. :)
"Giggity" is about the closest thing to 'hookup' in her profile, and it's just an indicator that she likes her Family Guy. | |
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Posted: 10/9/2009 10:23:19 AM | You are a gorgeous gal with alot of spunk! That in and of itself can be intimidating to many men.
If I were you, I would nix the line about a serious relationship being distracting. Right off the bat you give a vibe that you don't have time for a guy. Just leave it at....."Not looking for a serious relationship but would love to meet someone to go out and have fun with" or something similar.
And definately get rid of the last line about no response emails. It reeks of the frustration you are feeling. Not to minimize your frustration, but no need to advertise it either.
As a fellow "cheeky" chick I know you have to use caution in what you write so that you don't come off abrasive. You don't have to make it boring, just toned down a tad.
Good Luck!! | |
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Posted: 10/9/2009 10:35:41 AM | I read both your profiles and think this ones a bigger improvement.
I would cut down on the flashy icons thou. they are distracting.
I would agree with the girl above that if your fun loving and carefree you should
be more open to the possablities, then already drawing a line before you even meet.
If your not looking for anything serious, Then chances are there not going to take
you serious and pass you Right by. Also you might want to give it some time. Probably alot of prospect have come and gone since your first intial profile. So Many Know what to expect. If i see a girl i'm intrested in and her profiles does nothing for me.
Then I raely if ever view it again. You seem like a nice girl So I hope everthing
goes well. Good Luck! | |
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Posted: 10/9/2009 10:38:09 AM | MIXED “hookup” messages being conveyed by
1) “looking for a fun guy”…The guy isn’t thinking monopoly or movies.
2) “fun” and “adventure” and “nothing serious” and “have fun” and “some fun” and that’s all in the first few sentences.
3) But then ya stop his “have fun” thoughts and rabid salivation when ya say “no hookups”
4) But then later you say “exciting” and “adventurous”….he’s back to thinking about bedroom adventure ….not hiking in Big Sur
5) Your photos are lovely….the pink shirt photos are big time sexy, not Gidget (cup size and sexy eyes knock Gidge off her surf board). Your other photos are sexy and sultry, too….including the one with your head on the pillow, but you knew that. They would make a great Pin-up monthly calendar for the guy in your life….but you’ve gotta find him first.
6) You are a looker….but less is often more. Guys have active imaginations. No need to show it all…peak his interest and get his Anticipation motor running.
DenverSky5280 | |
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Posted: 10/9/2009 11:02:17 AM | No, you rock that pink shirt.
and it's just an indicator that she likes her Family Guy
Which means she's even more datable!
MIXED “hookup” messages being conveyed by
“looking for a fun guy” ...I'm thinking "
--hey she likes to get out and have fun, excitement, etc"
“fun” “adventure” “nothing serious” “have fun” “some fun”
--- ...um....yeah kinda reading way too into that
But then later you say “exciting” and “adventurous”….he’s back to thinking about bedroom adventure ….not hiking in Big Sur
DS you really have a low opinion of men. I doubt most guys on here would be thinking bedroom fun from this. I've never thought "adventure" meant sex. I was actually thinking Backpacking the Guadalupe.
Your photos are lovely….the pink shirt photos are big time sexy
Um, you see more skin at a local Walmart. It's a tasteful shirt.
Your other photos are sexy and sultry, too….including the one with your head on the pillow, but you knew that. They would make a great Pin-up monthly calendar
They would make a boring calendar. Not because she's not cute, but because they're totally not sexual, or sultry. There's no cleavage (unlike a lot of desperate profiles). There's no stupid mirror shots with kisses being blown to the mirror. Really, for the 26 age range, these pics are great. Most guys her age (hey that's me!) would flip to see a girl who posted so many pics, all of which are well done.
Guys have active imaginations. No need to show it all
You really need to visit a college campus. This is classy in comparison.
Keep the pics. Maybe replace 1-2 of them with "normal" shots where you're not posing. | |
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Posted: 10/9/2009 12:11:55 PM | Its nice to get an honest opinion from a guy, and whilst I appreciate DS's opinions, I think the opinions from a man are more relative. Women tend to be biased at times, and well they don't fully understand the complexities of a man and what goes thru their head whilst checking out a profile...hence why I posted up this ad! Hehe
I'll just keep my profile as is, since there doesn't seem to be a real issue with it. If guys aren't responding, I'm prolly just not their type...which seems to be the issue I've been having with California men anyway. Seems they prefer the skinny, blonde airheads...from what I gather... Oh well.
Btw, do you think my list of interests may be an issue? Some of them could be quite taboo to most people, so perhaps those can be turning them off?
And, any suggestions on how to message a guy to get a response??
Thanks!! =0) | |
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Posted: 10/9/2009 12:33:36 PM | I think your profile is great. I have no idea why guys aren't harrassing you constantly. I won't send a message unless I am inspired to say something. I guess my only advice is to rummage through the profiles, read them, and when inspiration strikes, use it! For example: Last night I was looking at profiles and came across one headline that said "Keep it Classy, Fort Collins"
Well this is an obvious reference to the movie Anchorman. So I wrote her.
Subject: 60% of the time, it works every time."
Message: I don't normally do this, but I felt compelled to tell you something. You have an absolutely breathtaking... heinie. I mean, that thing's good. I wanna be friends with it.
And that was it. Didnt even show a pic of her heinie, but judging from her breasts I am not too far off. LOL Anyway this worked, cause we are chatting now. But I never have any luck with the generic "Hey liked your profile. blah blah" I am no expert, obviously, but it seems that it is important to be funny in a way that relates to the profile. Simply saying "U'r cute, write me" doesnt work for me because I already have the upper hand. There is no challenge there. Perhaps that is key to an introductory email. Just something clever without revealing your hand.
You should move to Colorado! We'd all love you here. And thanks for your help on my post. | |
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Posted: 10/9/2009 12:34:36 PM | I'll pull a "You Go First" here and offer for you to drop me a line and I'll critique your opener. Pretend I'm in your area and there's interest - make up commonality if you need to.
I'm going to flag your potentially off-putting interests. They somewhat lend themselves to over-the-top reactions from your viewers:
Astrology (presumption being you're heavily into it)
Metaphysics
Down to Earth (why is this an interest anyway???)
Aliens (movie or the actual ones - either way, it goes from "I want to believe" to "Wonder if she's been abducted").
New Age (this is the only other one I can see a potential issue with. If that's your religion, why not flag it above? If not, let it be). | |
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Posted: 10/9/2009 12:35:23 PM | Groovy…you ARE most guys’ type imho. Most ladies here are inundated with guys contacting them.
RE: “low opinion of men”. Nooo…my opinion is formed by the fact you said guys aren’t responding. Since you’re hot and articulate and educated, and no one is biting….I look for BIG potential reasons why. The language of “fun” and “exciting” and “adventurous” is sooo easily interpreted and can easily turn OFF the right guys who would love to date someone like you. Ambiguous adjectives are best replaced with specifics imho. Posing and hot photos are best used in moderation and in combo with other type photos. DenverSky5280
(@SeekAdv..you’re a chivalrous guy…more than most, hun…that’s a HUGE compliment).
p.s. – check out the Ask a Guy Forum for opinions of other guys/gals ‘cause I just asked the guys how they would view those “fun” words. The answers thus far are interesting.
EDIT....p.p.s. -- now reads MUCH better with some of the "fun" and "exciting" words gone.
I'd also NIX the line about loving kids and pedo-pervs...that goes without saying and brings bad vibes and a bad visual image right at the end. Just NIX the whole line 'cause a guy who doesn't like kids isn't going to respond to someone with a child. | |
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Posted: 10/9/2009 12:45:29 PM | You know what? I like your profile now. More laid back, more open to possibilities, more approachable. Maybe take out the snip against country music (maybe the guy's mom is huge country fan?) but that's no big deal. In your first paragraph you mention adventure - but never give any examples - what kind of adventures are you into? Hiking, biking, mountain climbing???
I don't see anything terribly taboo in your interests - I wouldn't change that unless it is something you want to compromise on.
As far as messaging:
I would suggest a short note expressing your interest and why you are interested in him or why you think you'd be a good match. If it is someone you messaged before, maybe tell them you updated your profile and to take a look see :)
Really, you've got a great profile ... I can't imagine why a guy wouldn't respond to your messages?? | |
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Posted: 10/9/2009 1:14:04 PM | Hi Groovy....here's my rewrite of a profile SeekAdv posted for a man who never used it (his loss).
Maybe give it a trial spin and see if it catches some nice fish...
Have you been sitting at your computer all evening thinking "Wow, I really wish I had a nice date for this weekend?
Well look no further! With only 2 or 3 easy emails, one can be sent to your nearest Starbucks, express delivery for an introductory look-see. She’ll be the one sitting by the fireplace and reading the latest History of England or checking the TV guide to see when Family Guy is on next.
I know what you're thinking... Can she speak with a British accent? You’ll have to find out for yourself won’t ya…ya cheeky bloke!
Be prepared to amaze your friends with this Foxy Lady who believes in truth, justice, and the American way. She’s super-nice and a liberal. How cool is that.
Foxy Lady is planning her next summer’s getaway now and is looking for that special someone who also enjoys travel. Right now she’s looking at going to Sunny Stonehenge or Warm Wisconsin. Tough choice, huh? Please email your suggestions now.
But wait, there's more! Foxy Lacy slices, dices, and hey, when she cooks 4-minute eggs, she’s precise. No 3.5 minute eggs here. She’s a licensed mom! Better than that…her cooking hasn’t poisoned anyone yet. Be the envy of all your friends. Included with Foxy Lady is a free fashion consultation or a nice hug…your choice.
If you email within the next 120 seconds, you'll also receive:
* 1 free dance lesson (Foxy Lady is a good dancer)
* (fill in 1 or 3 more here)
[CONSUMER FDA Warning]
This product only compatible with males.
Foxy Lady is only licensed to practice humor in the continental U.S.
Use caution around candlelight.
Not intended for one night stands.
Must enjoy movies, reading, conversations, and dry British humor.
////////
If it works...remember to thank SeekAdventurer...he started it!
And DichoTommy is spot on with nixing those interests. :DenverSky5280 | |
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Posted: 10/9/2009 1:38:32 PM | | Wow that is an awesome profile. I can't use it now, but maybe able to modify it for an intro email. Thanks Seeks adventure. Wonder what else this guy has in his bag of awesome. | |
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Posted: 10/9/2009 1:40:05 PM | Oh goodness.
And you forgot to include "Do not sell or buy in California" | |
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Posted: 10/9/2009 1:46:07 PM | | Why not add "Known by the state of California to be a leading cause of awesome. Use only as directed, see participating stores for details." | |
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Posted: 10/9/2009 2:06:58 PM | THIS IS THE WORST PROFILE FOR STARTING ANY RELATIONSHIP WITH!
So, I know you're probably as frustrated with dating as I am (I think all men are using jerks).... but Victory shall be mine! (or ours? NOT, I will eventually get my way or else). I'm fun, down to earth and totally not psycho!(Like them other crazies on here. I am no different I just think I'm different but I am really bitter and crazy too) You like adventure?(Because it will be a adventure running from me)... keep reading:(You better, Damn it!) First off...Not looking for a serious relationship (I am not going to have a relationship with anyone) but would love to meet someone to go out and have fun with. (No one-nighters, however! Unless you got game I will put out for anyone who can seduce me because I had allot of one-nighters and don't want to be thought of as a slut) So, as of now, I'm just looking to date and have fun and meet some cool and interesting people! =0) (I will only date a player, bad boy or jerk who can keep me interested) Some things you should know about me:(If your still reading you are making a plan to get me into bed) I'm in the process of furthering my education, so I may pursue my goal of being a smart, successful, independent woman!(You will never be a priority and I will only have time for a booty call) I have a very peculiar sense of humor. My humor often tests the limits, and I can potentially say stuff that can be borderline offensive. (I will insult you and laugh at you to get you mad for the pleasure of Emasculating you) I guess you can most relate it to British humor. (self deprecating because I don't think much of myself) Kinda over the top, wacky and offensive. The British would call me "cheeky." (A Flirty Tease) So, if you can deal with that humor and have a laugh, we'd be a perfect match! hehe(So if your a Bad Boy Jerk you can turn my humor back on me) Also... I'm a single mum with a beautiful little boy.(So no guy will want me more than a Fuk Buddy and I accept that I am not looking for more than wild sex with some stud) I'm Spiritual but not religious.(I don't beleive in having any morals or values) I only eat chicken and fish (as far as meats go, except for your man meat YUMMY) I have a broad taste in music, except for Country. Songs about making love to your pick up truck ain't my bag, baby.(I like hardcore music & RAP about sex and disrespect toward women) I love English culture(Especially the Punk style like the Sex Pistols can gangbang me any day) I'm a damn, hippy, tree-hugging liberal.(I don't mind running around naked and having wild animal sex) I'm a superhero and I fight crime- I also churn butter part time.(I like to dress up as a heroine or tease and play villians come rape the helpless vixen) So, fellas...I can’t guarantee that I’ll be your perfect match, (Because you will just want sex until it gets old with me) but I can guarantee that once you meet me, you will be happy you did! (Because I am wild in bed) We'll have a great time...most sure of it! =0)(You can have sex with me anywhere at anytime you want) Still with me?(Got a Boner yet?)... Great!.. here are a few more things I feel are important to mention:(I don't want any loser to contact me for sex so:) What I'm looking for:(What I am hoping to get but doubt it) Mature yet young at heart (Got to be smooth and sexy) Has a great sense of humor (Got joke with my stupid humor) Appreciates the smaller things in life (Got to appreciate my small breasts & insecurities) Liberal (Not a judgemental right wing republican who will try to tame me) Exciting and adventurous (Wild and Sexy) Down to earth (Not crazier than me) Intelligent (Good at keeping my interest) Confident but not conceited (Got to be a****, strong mescaline, womanizing Bad Boy) Loves children (In a non-pedo way) and mom's w/ them!(Can be a playful immature child too my mom can take care of everyone) A stimulating and open-minded conversationalist (Good at dirty talk) Sooo...if what I have wrote in my super long profile thing tickles your fancy, say hi or something! If not, then happy fishing! Taaaaaaa!!!!(If you want a good time with no commitment write me something interesting or you lose out on sex) Oh, and if you're interested, don't just add me to your favorites list... send me a message!(I am not interested in creepy nice guys who are shy) Cheers!! (Cum and get me) First Date - Something fun and competitive! Makes things more interesting! (Get me to chase you and I'll be more willing to put out) And if you can think of anything creative that doesn't involve us getting insatiably drunk or doing anything we may regret the next morning...feel free to get involved!  (If you can seduce me with allot of alcohol you will get lucky on the first date, just don't call me after because I'm sluty) | |
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Posted: 10/9/2009 2:13:21 PM | Wow dude, you must have some serious ego issues. Have you just been turned down by too many beautiful women on this site and now feel the need to take it out on someone else?
Not a judgemental left wing republican who will try to tame me
Republicans are right wing, you idiot. | |
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Posted: 10/9/2009 2:23:50 PM | OK fixed it thanks for the self-righteous correction Mr. Politically Correct | |
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Posted: 10/9/2009 2:58:52 PM | You gotta stop by more often A Woman’s Best Friend….LOVE it! 
Couldn’t get her to believe me ‘cause I had real boobs not moobs. | |
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Posted: 10/9/2009 3:07:59 PM | | A woman's best friend?? Really...more like a woman's worse nightmare. You sound like a pessimistic, butt-sore wanker. I only asked for critical, yet positive feedback and you flipped it around making me sound like some ho-bag. You're an ass. | |
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Posted: 10/9/2009 3:13:01 PM | | BTW...that's pretty low and degrading to insult my breasts. I'm sure you're looking for F-cups, but mine are real C's and I've never had any complaints. I think you have a massive ego issue with a small****and feel the need to take out your insecurities on others. Get a life. | |
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