| what goes wrong?
Posted: 10/11/2009 3:19:41 PM | I am an honest guy, I have a job that pays my bills, but its like every woman I meet and actually start to care about, ends up ending it after like 5 to 6 months. not to mention I have been on this site lil over a year now, and both woman that I have started seeing from here the same thing basically happened, to make a long story short, both of them were talking to someone else. anyone have any advice on this?javascript:smilie(' ') | |
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| what goes wrong?
Posted: 10/11/2009 3:32:10 PM | hello
not sure what your question is. When you start dating someone you expect them to stop talking to other men? Life is too short to act married when you're only dating.
Maybe you're getting too serious too soon? Most women nowdays don't want to be smothered | |
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| what goes wrong?
Posted: 10/11/2009 3:37:14 PM | | ok its basically what happens at that point that we end up braking up, and its not that I would expect them to stop talking to other guys if we were just dating, its when were more then dating and actually in the relationship and then 5 to 6 months later there cheating on me that I have the problem with | |
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| what goes wrong?
Posted: 10/11/2009 3:54:59 PM | If you are repeatedly getting into relationships with women who cheat on you once committed allow me to suggest perhaps you're not picking the right women.
speaking for myself, I'd leave a relationship before I'd cheat. I don't even cheat at solitaire so I don't know WHY ppl do it.
Stop wasting your time on floozies. raise the bar.
maybe try women with more education or who attend church (not that all of them don't cheat but it might help)
I don't know WHY ppl cheat but if my partners repeatedly cheated on me, I'd be at a therapist trying to figure out why I keep picking them.
but then, look who's talking, my husband dumped me for my daughter | |
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| what goes wrong?
Posted: 10/11/2009 4:19:06 PM | Like attracts like.
Laws of attraction.
Think about it. | |
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| what goes wrong?
Posted: 10/11/2009 5:30:03 PM | A strong relationship isn't just about a "job that pays bills", it's about the time you spend, the attention you offer and the goosebumps you give..
At 5, 6 months it should still be a honeymoon stage, not her not feeling content and start wandering with her eyes and then end up cheating and breaking of with you.
Are you devoting your time to her, or to your child and work and just "expect" she's happy?
You may not be picking the wrong women, just don't know how to have a committed relationship that works.
Read up on relationships and see where you may be going wrong. | |
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| what goes wrong?
Posted: 10/11/2009 6:33:47 PM | | you problem is that your probably a good guy and girls dont like good guys. they get bored of good guys. this is from personal experience i know, so start being a****haha that might work, its what im going to do. | |
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| what goes wrong?
Posted: 10/11/2009 7:41:39 PM | | OP, get used to it. This is the way it is now. | |
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| what goes wrong?
Posted: 10/11/2009 7:58:25 PM | | OP, I wish I knew the answer. Sometimes I think Relationships, Marriage, and dating have all gone down hill ever since the invention of the internet. I love computers and technology, but the internet seems to cause more breakups than it ever creates, and I wish I knew why that math wont add up, but thats the way it seems. | |
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| what goes wrong?
Posted: 10/11/2009 8:38:46 PM | Jammer, I agree with you...in my experience men I meet seem so in love with the idea that there are virtually hundreds of women just fingertips away, that they can not just meet a woman that they are attracted to and have a lot in common with and have fun with...and call it good: they have to keep searching for the BBD (Bigger, Better Deal) I suspect women do it too...I wouldn't know.
To the "nice guys" out there...please continue being nice guys until all us "nice girls" find you!!  | |
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| what goes wrong?
Posted: 10/11/2009 8:40:00 PM | um well .. you guys are bitter
and it's NOT the internet .. if your sig other is more interested in the computer than you, get rid of the computer or them - that's what I did and I'm happier for it.
and it's not 'just the way things are'
and good women (and men) DO like good men (etc)
nobody wants to be with a sh*t.
YOU are not responsible for other ppl's actions.
Allow me to suggest that if they're cheating early in the relationship that maybe they never intended to be faithful? maybe they're using you for your income and nice qualities and maybe you're settling for whatever you feel you can get?
I'd say - take it slower? maybe not get exclusive or live together for a year or so .. see how it goes .. can always get more serious but getting less serious is painful.
And you other guys are only gonna get out of a relationship what you put into it - if that. | |
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| what goes wrong?
Posted: 10/11/2009 8:48:43 PM | I think that's the point, Cricket...that sooo many people on the internet aren't the faithful type...it's the sorting out that is painful for us who don't treat people that way. I don't think it's bitterness...much as it is chagrin, pain or frustration. It's not always true that you only get out of it what you put in....or else maybe you wouldn't even be on here, eh? smiles
Some people WANT to find one person and be happy together and are tired of sifting and are venting on here...please don't judge us because we hurt!
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| what goes wrong?
Posted: 10/12/2009 12:25:59 PM | LMAO cincychic
and angel I wasn't referring to online singles in general I was referrring to the 3 boderline hostile posts from the 3 guys
sorry for the confusion | |
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| what goes wrong?
Posted: 10/12/2009 6:32:57 PM | If you're not driving, you're being taken for a ride.
Hey, was that deep or what? | |
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| what goes wrong?
Posted: 10/12/2009 7:01:13 PM | I need a few more details about what exactly went on in the two relationships to come up with an answer for why they did it, along with knowing them and what they were about.
Not all women cheat. And do you mean they had sex behind your back with other guys or do you mean they dated other guys, or just talked to other guys? | |
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| what goes wrong?
Posted: 10/12/2009 8:17:18 PM | I heard this along time ago, and I'll throw it out for kicks. "If you want to be happy in your life, marry yourself an ugly wife!"
I don't know what you bring to a relationship, but every time something ends for me, I spend a fair amount of time figuring out what went wrong, why it went the way it did and what I might do in the future to change that. Sometimes I just throw my hands up in frustration and say, "I don't f'in know."
A bunch of people in a forum, who don't know you or the situations, aren't going to help you. We offer opinions, mostly jaded from bad experiences...and some wisdom...but ultimately the take away from the whole thing is up to you.
Like others have said, this game isn't about what you make, when you pay your bills or how good you think you are. We're governed by laws of attraction, driven by a mysterious and unpredictable thing called love and the moral fabric of today's world is frighteningly fleeting. Competition is high and many are willing to compromise. Pick your poisons carefully and pay attention from day one.
Sometimes you gotta pay to play...but if you're not lovin' to learn and learnin' to love...you're wasting your time. | |
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