| Tired of Sexual overtures by men I havent even met yet......
Posted: 10/15/2009 1:27:18 PM | What do you think , Guys? I already know how ladies feel about this.
I am exhausted by having someone contact me.... they seem polite, interested, charming... and then they spoil it by asking me how I like to get off. Or even worse! I just chatted with someone who asked me if bigger is better? And then told me his nickname is tripod. OMG
Where are the men that believe in meeting the woman.. dating her... wooing her.. before you pressure her about sex???? I am not a prude.. and have been quite wild in my day... but, I am now looking for a serious relationship and it certainly is not going to be with someone so shallow that all they want is a sexual adventure.
Do men have so little confidence in themselves that they think the only thing they can brag about are their body parts? Or what tricks they can do?
I am very discouraged. Do you have any advice? | |
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genki
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Joined: 10/8/2009
Msg: 3 | |
| Tired of Sexual overtures by men I havent even met yet......
Posted: 10/15/2009 1:36:42 PM | I'm the guy that dates and gets to know a woman. Not that it helps you any, just letting you know we are out here.
Personally I don't mind if a woman is forward or gets a bit nasty. Probably because it doesn't happen too often. I'm not likely to see someone who acts that way, but it doesn't phase me. | |
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| Tired of Sexual overtures by men I havent even met yet......
Posted: 10/15/2009 1:41:16 PM | If I were a woman I'd just have a bit of fun with (not in the sexual sense) wind them make em think there gonna get some, when in actual fact there not. I had a female friend once who got chatting to a guy online and he had offered her money to have sex with him. So I suggested she pretend and go along with it, so she did. This whole thing went on for days messaging back and fourth and the guy really believed he was gonna get laid...it was funny! | |
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| Tired of Sexual overtures by men I havent even met yet......
Posted: 10/15/2009 1:50:49 PM |
I am very discouraged. Do you have any advice?
Sorry to hear that. I've heard the same from female friends and ladies I've met through POF that they've experienced such 'inappropriate' behaviour too. I'm afraid this is a side of POF where women - in general - have a much worse experience than guys.
What advice can there be than that you've got to rise above it? And continue to believe that there are decent guys out there. Since I am one - I have never nor would I ever write or say such a things as you've mentioned - I can assure you there are.
Do men have so little confidence in themselves that they think the only thing they can brag about are their body parts? Or what tricks they can do?
Yes, SOME do. Just as some lie, cheat, steal, frequent strip bars and pay women for sex. Some, but not the majority. I suspect it's a very vocal minority though - hence your experience. | |
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| Tired of Sexual overtures by men I havent even met yet......
Posted: 10/15/2009 1:56:55 PM | Try looking at the situation from a more positive perspective.
You know what you want.
These guys are simultaneously weeding themselves out and ensuring that they do not get what they want, which is NSA mattress mambo.
Unless those guys are dealing with women who want the same thing (regardless of what the women *say* they want) the consequences of their behaviour constitute it's own punishment.
I'm guessing that you've also had serious relationships before. What set *those* guys apart? Identify the conditions in which you met those guys, and the way(s) in which those relationships developed and try to duplicate them.
I would also suggest a bit of an attitude adjustment. Just because all some guy happens to want is a s*xual adventure, does not make him shallow, just as your own past of having exactly that sort of advertures that does not make you shallow then, or deep now.
It just makes him insufficiently attracted to you as a person to actually want something more. I'm not saying you're unattractive, just that in the tired phrase, "they're just not that into you". | |
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| Tired of Sexual overtures by men I havent even met yet......
Posted: 10/15/2009 1:59:53 PM | | It’s par for the course OP, don’t let it get you down, actually it’s a good weeding tool if you chat with them a little before you decide to meet them. You might be surprised how many women do the crude sexual flirting thing too. | |
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| Tired of Sexual overtures by men I havent even met yet......
Posted: 10/15/2009 2:06:25 PM | There are many men looking for serious relationships on sites like this, but they tend to get crowded out by their more aggressive and vulgar colleagues. If you want to find them, you will have to look for them and probably make the first move. Considering how many women claim to want this kind of guy, if you see any, snap them up, because they won't last long.
For women, being propositioned is a hazard inherent to online dating. You either deal with it, or you will have challenges. One alternative you might consider is taking classes, joining clubs or volunteering with organizations that will allow you to get to know men outside of the pressure cooker of the dating scene. | |
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| Tired of Sexual overtures by men I havent even met yet......
Posted: 10/15/2009 2:32:28 PM | Dang OP...the name of that town must have been Cold Springs until you moved there!
Umm, OT: "Tripod", eh? lmao Okay, sorry...yeah, block delete. Tripod..omgawd.
Truly, I am sorry. It's just that I read about this kind of thing here all the time and I have a stiff neck today so, I can't shake my head again...
tripod...pffft.
~ds~ | |
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| Tired of Sexual overtures by men I havent even met yet......
Posted: 10/15/2009 2:46:18 PM | | shelasmiles - What world do you live in? This is a free site and therefore it will attract LOW LIFES. This is a forum without morals and tact. Don't let it upset you, just read, delete and block if necessary. Some of you ladies are very classy and decent but you must lead a really sheltered life if you come on here and don't expect this type of behavior... | |
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| Tired of Sexual overtures by men I havent even met yet......
Posted: 10/15/2009 2:51:10 PM | @joshblueyes "guys want sex, I'm pretty sure the world already knows this, Even the nice guys think about it too!"
While everyone will think about it, there's a difference between someone with self control and respect and someone who is plain thinking with their short sword. | |
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| Tired of Sexual overtures by men I havent even met yet......
Posted: 10/15/2009 3:03:33 PM | So you would prefer a sexual minuet, or perhaps a short symphonic quartet? Overtures are over the top.
To my own personal amazement, I have witnessed this sort of behavior by men SUCCEED many times. As someone who can't carry it off (I am not well enough versed in sexual innuendo speech), I resent the hell out of their success ratio, especially when it works on women who I find attractive as well.
So please, do dump out of their messages, but since it works for them, thaaaat's why they do it. Simple. | |
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| Tired of Sexual overtures by men I havent even met yet......
Posted: 10/15/2009 3:05:47 PM |
What do you think , Guys?
I think I'm tired of pretty women complaining about men wanting to have sex with them.
Where are the men that believe in meeting the woman.. dating her... wooing her.. before you pressure her about sex?
Partying with Prince Charming & Santa Clause.
* I am exhausted by having someone contact me.... they seem polite, interested, charming... and then they spoil it by asking me how I like to get off.
* And then told me his nickname is tripod. OMG
* I am not a prude.
Make up your mind please.
Prude: especially one who is easily offended by matters of a sexual nature
(Source: en.wiktionary.org/wiki/prude)
Do you have any advice?
Get realistic expectations. Men & women are billions of generations of a species that have become better and better a procreating. We're hard wired to want to put our penis in women (well, generally women) - and many of us aren't apologetic about it.
Think about the kind of men you're attracted to, or baiting. If every man you're talking to brings up sex before you even meet - the least common denominator is you. | |
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| Tired of Sexual overtures by men I havent even met yet......
Posted: 10/15/2009 3:11:51 PM | I'm going to agree with igorfrankensteen. The thing about guys' behaviour is, we do what works for us (except for the bull-headed among us, but that's another story). So guys who message women with sexual innuendos right off the bat, or talk about their penis like it's a work of art, are doing these things because they've worked. I don't have enough fingers to count how many times I've pursued women by just getting to know them, only to lose them to guys with peanuts for brains who just talk about their time at the gym and their sexual exploits, so even I know it works. It doesn't work for you, that's great to hear, but guys do this because women fall for it.
That came off more bitter than I intended. My apologies. | |
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