| Too poor to date?
Posted: 10/17/2009 4:48:24 PM | so I am not whining but enquiring here
I think I am too poor to date... because today..my impression of dating is that is very much a reciprocal type thing.....
Plus being a female you have
a) new clothes to buy
b) hair nails and makeup to attend to
c) reciprocal paying of dates.....
most recently there was a huge disparity in the financial status and I hated that he had to pay most of the time
What do others think about this? could someone be "too poor" to date? | |
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| Too poor to date?
Posted: 10/17/2009 5:17:27 PM | | Maybe I am old fashioned, but if I am taking a woman out I pay. That is just how it is. With that said, yeah you can be to poor to do a traditional date. The whole dinner, drinks, and such can cost alot. I know that I have dropped well over a hundred dollars on just a short date. But there are other things you can do. There are walks by the river. Dinner and a movie at home (one of my favs because I love to cook). Lots of cool classes that you can take together (chocolate making, art type classes, glass blowing, and such). There is plenty to do in this city that cost very little. You just have to be open minded to what is out there. | |
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| Too poor to date?
Posted: 10/17/2009 5:22:01 PM | | Exactly! And if you're concerned about reciprocating then make him his favourite cookies or do something for him that he's been procrastinating about... You don't have to spend loads of cash to show someone you care. | |
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| Too poor to date?
Posted: 10/17/2009 5:23:31 PM | Dating can be cheap..if you're creative. $5 for a movie, 2 bucks for a coffee and a long chat. You can walk down 17th Ave (or Whyte in your case) or put $10 bucks in a car and go for a trip. Unfortunately dating is always associated with going out for dinner and drinks..which pushes $$ well into $70 in Calgary. Why go out to eat when I can make food at home for way less
As for dressing up, I can't speak for other guys, but I think women look best just being themselves in jeans and a shirt. Who wants a dress code in life? Nice clothes are usually uncomfortable. I could live my life in shorts and sandals.
As for reciprocal dating..I personally wouldn't expect someone with a lower income to reciprocate. It's only logical that you can't afford the same level of lifestyle so it's unrealistic to expect you to pay to take me to a pub, etc.
To put it very bluntly, I have a MUCH bigger problem with some female pulling in 65K a year that expects me to pay all the time..than a woman that has a lower income or is a single mother (where money is usually tight). It's all situational.
Good company makes a good date and that's usually free. | |
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| Too poor to date?
Posted: 10/17/2009 5:57:15 PM | Hey can I borrow that line Anti elvis"good company makes a good date? love that one.
Being a girl is very expensive I blow 45 a month on nails, 120 for highlights ( and that is cheap...some place charge upwards of 300) and if I dont colour...(I hate to admit this.. I am going gray.....getting old) and yes I agree clothes doent have to bo special,,but is really is a matter of confidence... new earrings and shoes ( I love stilletto's) are expensive honey and .....you do like the look of female in nice stilleto's dont you?
Okay I hear ya...... | |
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| Too poor to date?
Posted: 10/17/2009 6:16:56 PM | Wow, edmcherub ... if you can afford $165 a month on nails and hair, and buy new clothes, earrings and shoes for your dates ... you are very likely far from "too poor to date"!
Yikes! I guess some of us others should just give up on the idea of dating altogether then... | |
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| Too poor to date?
Posted: 10/17/2009 6:27:46 PM | | $165 a month is more then I spend on entertainment. That is a lot of money. I mean if you have it awesome, but wow. I am glad that I am a guy. A pack of really nice razors to shave my face and head are less then $20. Add on the Nivia of men lotion for my head after I shave is about $6. I cannot believe how much women spend on products. | |
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| Too poor to date?
Posted: 10/17/2009 6:35:27 PM | Ok I can see justifying the hair, but if you are looking to cut, doing your nails yourself might save some money. Plus, do you need any more shoes? New clothes all the time? What about the ones that you have? I spend $40/month for haircut etc, and I know that it costs more for a woman.
Like others have said, there are cheaper things you two could do, and you could offer to cook some meals at your place or something. | |
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| Too poor to date?
Posted: 10/17/2009 6:54:37 PM | you guys have no idea who expensive it is to be a women
perfume
most women need a few new pairs of shoes a year and maybe new boots but we need work clothes, then casual clothes then summer work clothes and lingerie
Anyone have a problem if we spend money on lingerie? | |
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| Too poor to date?
Posted: 10/17/2009 7:06:19 PM |
Anyone have a problem if we spend money on lingerie
I'm sure my opinion differs from other guys but I really don't see the point of lingerie. I don't think it's sexy. I'd sooner have a female dressed just in a t shirt than in some slinky lingerie. Then again, I'm weird. I think that a woman in jeans and a t shirt is more sexy than a woman in a short skirt. | |
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| Too poor to date?
Posted: 10/17/2009 7:14:53 PM | | anti elvis..you dont like thongs? strapless dresses (which require strapless bras of various colours) | |
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| Too poor to date?
Posted: 10/17/2009 7:38:25 PM | edmcherub I think you need to stop worrying about the packaging and let your inner beauty shine through.
Outside show is a poor substitute for inner worth. .... Aesop | |
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| Too poor to date?
Posted: 10/17/2009 7:51:22 PM |
Good company makes a good date and that's usually free.
Very true. When I think about the great dates I've had (and the best ones have been the beginning of a relationship) all I remember about them was that there was a LOT of talking. I'm probably not alone.
Talking shouldn't have to cost much. | |
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| Too poor to date?
Posted: 10/17/2009 9:19:23 PM |
you guys have no idea who expensive it is to be a women
While I'm not a woman, I do have a sister and an ex that are women that have both managed to live quite cheaply sometimes based on what I remember seeing of their lifestyles. I know my sister doesn't do highlights or get her nails done, but that is her choice and how she chooses to live. While it is possible for life to be expensive, are you possibly assuming a few things here? What I'm asking is, how do you know that things like perfume and fancy shoes will work better on a date than simply smelling like your deodorant/shampoo/body wash and wearing simple shoes? I'm just asking to see if you have really played the "what if I didn't do that?" all the way out as opposed to being risk-averse and not trying. | |
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| Too poor to date?
Posted: 10/17/2009 9:59:38 PM |
anti elvis..you dont like thongs? strapless dresses (which require strapless bras of various colours)
Nope, I can't say that a thong makes me hot for a girl..nor does a strapless dress. I think that often the girls that show the least become the hottest. A woman in jeans and a t-shirt that lets me have a "peak" at things is more sexy than a woman in lingerie.
Maybe I'm just weird, I don't know. I don't want to see it Edmcherub, I want to "imagine it". | |
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| Too poor to date?
Posted: 10/17/2009 10:01:48 PM | Is this for real??
First of all, there are plenty of ways to look great without spending a ton of cash. I am not above shopping at Walmart or even the VV boutique, what do I care what name is or isn't on something?
As for reciprocating on the date, I agree.. to a point. It is up to you what type of date you agree to, if you are feeling strapped for cash and want to be prepared to go dutch (even though imo this should be discussed beforehand) or just offer to get part of it (and he actually lets you), then suggest coffee or a walk in the park.
I genuinely don't understand this reasoning, are you looking for a wealthy man and think you should project an air of wealth to attract him? I don't get it. | |
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| Too poor to date?
Posted: 10/17/2009 10:08:02 PM | | trust me ..wealth is not something I seek.. I am a Chartered Accountant specializing in taxation >I see wealth all the time and those people are not different that you andI.... just wanted to create a thread with substance,,, and frankly whenI dated..many moons ago..,..there was no dutch......I do shop Walmart and goodwill..so I am no premadonna but I like to look good and my personal signature is my stilletto's...sorry to offend anyone,... | |
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| Too poor to date?
Posted: 10/17/2009 10:22:17 PM | No, no offense, I just genuinely didn't understand is all.
Now if you were a man posting this... imagine how different the responses would be..
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| Too poor to date?
Posted: 10/17/2009 10:43:08 PM | In the end, life is all about marketing..the entire world is all about sales. I'm not saying that's right, I'm saying that's just how it is...
If you're a female, it's pretty easy to attract the attention of a man with a slinky dress, lingerie or a boob shot. While no man is going to admit it on this site, that is our nature, we are visual creatures. That's not a fault of men, it's how we are. It's the reason we like photos of naked girls..whereas women like smutty romance novels. The two sexes see life very differently..but both have the same goals.
As a female, you will always garner the attention of ALL males by wearing a short skirt, hot lingerie & doing yourself up. Hey, I'm a straight guy and if I see some girl walking up my street with a short skirt, done up, I look too. I check her out
I know that I will take a WHOLE bunch of flak for saying this, but so be it. I'm not a person to pull punches. When I see a woman that has to "sell herself" with her body, boobs, etc...and not her mind, brains, etc..it just makes her seem disposable and cheap. A woman pimped out in lingerie or a mini skirt with high heels strikes me as a great "week long fling" but no where does she hit the "stable, long term GF" on my radar.
I can't say I speak for other males, but maybe I do. I don't know. But if I was looking for someone that was long term..I want a girl that has more than just a nice set of boobs and a low cut shirt. First I want to see her brains..and see that she's comfortable with herself. Then..alone, I want to see those other attributes.
To the OP, I doubt you listen to Hiphop, but I do. Rappers often say "I want a lady in the streets but a freak in the sheets". There is a whole bunch of truth to that. I don't want you to sell your "wares" at the club..just alone home with me.
And I should have predicated this with a comment that I'm hardly some "Quaker like prude". Exactly the opposite. | |
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| Too poor to date?
Posted: 10/17/2009 10:43:26 PM | | as a man i would never post like this , i have trouble walking in stillettos and i don't like highlights or having my nails done , | |
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| Too poor to date?
Posted: 10/17/2009 10:46:04 PM | | Most men don't usually notice or care if your nails are manicured or your hair is styled. I think women spend so much money on themselves to compete with other women. | |
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| Too poor to date?
Posted: 10/17/2009 10:48:10 PM |
as a man i would never post like this , i have trouble walking in stillettos and i don't like highlights or having my nails done lol, cute.
I was talking about claiming to be too poor to date.. you know, take a woman out.
I'm pretty sure the responses would differ..
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| Too poor to date?
Posted: 10/17/2009 11:13:00 PM | | I am worried that dddiesel claims to have experience in walking in stillettos....... | |
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| Too poor to date?
Posted: 10/17/2009 11:19:28 PM | Well I get highlights and I've walked in stillettos (dressed as a chick on Halloween of course)
It's pure hell to be honest. My fishnets were torn too..wearing a skirt in October is just outright cold.
I like being a boy. | |
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| Too poor to date?
Posted: 10/17/2009 11:57:05 PM | | AE, your post a few up was on the money. But I do get a bit worried when you say you want to see her brains. Are you working the amateur neurologist angle? Now I love lingerie on a woman. It is a huge turn on. But I don't want the rest of the pub or where ever we happen to be seeing it. As AE knows I worked at a liquor store for a while. Some of the outfits I saw come and go there was something. And AE is right, the smaller and "sexier" the outfit the less respect the woman commanded. Yeah, they were hot, but you kind of look at them as meat. I am not saying that women that dress in miniskirts and small tops are not worthy of respect. Just that when you see a woman in f- me pumps, that is what you think she is looking for. Cloths do not make the man. Frankly I think a woman that can hit Value village and come out looking good is a good catch. Thrifty and trendy is a +1 for me. | |
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