| Location, location
Posted: 10/19/2009 8:48:19 PM | | Yesterday someone told me that my province (Nova Scotia) is one where most couples remain married and if anyone is single, there is a very good reason that they aren't married. I live in Nova Scotia and I'm inclined to believe this claim. If you lived in an area where there seemed to be few opportunities to meet another partner, would you move? Would you gamble and risk leaving a good job and/or a good home towards a richer partner environment on the hopes of meeting someone? I'm inclined to say no to this risk, knowing that I am relegating myself to a life of singleness because the hand played is a big gamble with no known odds. And yet, the prospect of growing old *alone* in a sweet home with a nice career is not yet part of my dreams. | |
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| Location, location
Posted: 10/19/2009 9:06:33 PM | | Tough call, Ms. Brooker. The area where you live is beautiful, but yes, I can see that social life there may be on the "provincial" category. So can you find an Islander that suits your needs? I've got no idea. Would some guy from south of the border move to be with you? Harder question. Off hand, I'd say yes. You have a lot to offer: Beauty, wit, humor, a sharp mind and a wonderful personality. To tell you the truth, I'd consider it. | |
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| Location, location
Posted: 10/19/2009 9:07:31 PM | Location matters, still - the Atlantic provinces are more social and supporting. Its more me-me-me in Ontario, tuff to marry in Quebec and well... let's skip the prairies unless you like wind. BC is more laid back. Where the guys and the Wild Things are is definitely northern Alberta or anywhere near the Yellowhead highway and north.
There's a long history of following the prey amongst my relatives, but those days chasing the Porcupine herd are distant ancestral memories. | |
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| Location, location
Posted: 10/19/2009 9:22:13 PM | Looking for a geographical cure are we.....
I'm a firm believer that if you open your heart to love, it will find you no matter where you live.  | |
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| Location, location
Posted: 10/19/2009 10:11:26 PM | | Years ago I watched a video of a woman who stooped to selling homemade applesauce and sticking her arm up a horses rear to find the man of her dreams right in her neck of woods. | |
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| Location, location
Posted: 10/19/2009 10:50:43 PM | OP, tough decision. though once one starts considering the options...
any way to spend some time in larger centres (Halifax, even, though i've no idea whether there're wonderful single men there?)... there are more people self-employed in portable ways than there used to be, including folk who make a living over the internet... maybe such a person would relocate to where you are? or an early-retired man...?
i don't know... i identify with what you are saying-- lived in small town ontario for a while, where it was very closed.... if i'd had a good job there and other reasons to stay... it might have been hard to leave.
wishing you the best with this. | |
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| Location, location
Posted: 10/20/2009 12:13:22 AM |
I identify with what you are saying--lived in small town ontario for a while where it was very closed...if I'd had a good job there and other reasons to stay...it might have been hard to leave.
I can certainly relate. I just moved from a small Ontario town, where you had to put 10 men together in a room to get a full set of teeth.......  It was a social wasteland. Because I am retired, I didn't even have the social interaction of the workplace.
My only saving grace, during those 3 yrs. was being able to travel during the winter months to a warmer climate and to the "land of the living". I can certainly understand how people, who live in small towns or isolated areas, have a tougher time meeting someone compatible.
Being a believer in destiny, fate or whatever you want to call it.......I believe if I'm meant to meet someone, it won't matter where I am on the planet. If it's meant to happen.....it'll happen. Of course, sometimes we have to help fate along.........by being in a place, where more eligible people are and where chances of fulfilling destiny are greater........
In a way, dating is somewhat like buying real estate. Finding an ideal relationship is like finding the ideal house. It's all about location, location, location. | |
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| Location, location
Posted: 10/20/2009 12:20:04 AM | | i have moved for various reasons, but i did it strategically. found options where i was happy geographically and in the past, found employment or contracts so i wouldn't be resentful or homeless once i arrived. however, i was not and am not content to live life out alone. if you are, then you should stay. just make sure you have a "plan". but of course, i was a strategic planner--so easy for me to say. | |
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| Location, location
Posted: 10/20/2009 2:26:00 AM |
If you lived in an area where there seemed to be few opportunities to meet another partner, would you move?
No I wouldn't ,because as soon as I have more time to look, and more time to travel, growing *old* alone will never be one of my options. Until you actually find him, I'd say Stay Put and Enjoy the Scenery. | |
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rm.h
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Joined: 9/10/2009
Msg: 10 | |
| Location, location
Posted: 10/20/2009 3:01:37 AM | [I can certainly relate. I just moved from a small Ontario town, where you had to put 10 men together in a room to get a full set of teeth....... It was a social wasteland./]
oh oh.......I may have to consider my options. | |
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| Location, location
Posted: 10/20/2009 3:13:45 AM |
Would you gamble and risk leaving a good job and/or a good home towards a richer partner environment on the hopes of meeting someone?
Certainly not with that motive. You could end up a stranger in a strange land that you don't like after all. If you're going to move, pick a place you like, and you may meet someone who likes it for the same reasons. | |
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| Location, location
Posted: 10/20/2009 3:26:02 AM | First of all, I think most people put down their home region because they have this mistaken belief that life is better "out there" -- somewhere. It's the "grass is always greener" syndrome.
But, then, consider this: Of three major objectives one might have in life -- good home, good career, good partner -- do you give up two to go elsewhere and seek the third? That doesn't make sense to me.
Keep your eyes and your heart open. You'll find someone to share that home and support that career. | |
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| Location, location
Posted: 10/20/2009 4:16:14 AM | oh oh.......I may have to consider my options.
You betcha......we all have options.
I moved to the city I'm living in for two reasons..........
1...........it's my hometown....... and.........
2. .........there are numerous social opportunities & activities available.
I DID NOT move to find a man. I DID NOT move because I thought the "grass would be greener". I moved to make myself happier. And, I am.
If a quality man falls outta the sky and into my lap, that will be a bonus.
OP: It's a matter of weighing all the pros and cons and making the decision that's best for you. But, I wouldn't change a thing if the only reason is, to find a man or to be in a larger dating pool. " The idea of this mystery man" would have to be pretty enticing to change my entire life, in order to find him. | |
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| Location, location
Posted: 10/20/2009 5:22:46 AM |
If a quality man falls outta the sky and into my lap, that will be a bonus.
Well now, Ms Phoebe, if memory serves me well, London has a local Para-Diving club. You can improve your chances by going out on a Saturday afternoon and watching the jumps. Mr. Right may well just fall out of the sky into your lap! | |
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| Location, location
Posted: 10/20/2009 5:26:10 AM | Moving to an area with a larger single male population isn't going to guarantee that you're going to meet the man of your dreams.
I'll be moving in a few years, for a better job and benefits. | |
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| Location, location
Posted: 10/20/2009 5:28:06 AM | I don't know, when I lived in the Maritimes, the social scene was wild and exciting, and generally speaking people who live in rural settings have told me that the actions is far more intense there than in the city areas.
As to it being hard to marry in Quebec, I don't know where that comes from. Rural Quebec is about 10 to 1 women to men, and the urban life here is one big party all the time. Ontario is somewhat more staid, but the big problem there is you have no time to socialize, what with getting up at 4:00 AM to commute to the office and getting home exhausted at 9:00 PM after work, then spending all your money just to have a place to sleep in.... | |
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| Location, location
Posted: 10/20/2009 6:06:02 AM |
I just moved from a small Ontario town...
oh dear, i'm really in trouble now...
after spending most of my life in the bustling metropolitan areas of Toronto and Ottawa, i consider our current location to be a fairly small place!
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| Location, location
Posted: 10/20/2009 6:17:13 AM | | What did or did not happen since the last time you asked this and got the same answers, that asking again became the thing to do? | |
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| Location, location
Posted: 10/20/2009 6:24:01 AM | Well now, Ms. Phoebe, if memory serves me well, London has a local Para-Diving club.
I think your memory is slipping Mr. RG.....there's no such thing as para-diving? There's an Ontario sky- diving club and an Ontario para-sailing club, both of which are headquartered in Toronto. And, I'm not willing to change my location and move to T.O., in order to increase my chances.
The closest thing to any kind of "diving club" in London is a scuba-diving club.
Now, there's a thought............I may have to change my mind on the idea of a "man fallin' outta the sky". Instead, I may have to wait for him "to come up for air"........... | |
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| Location, location
Posted: 10/20/2009 6:27:07 AM | I feel like I am in the same situation. I kind of live in the middle of nowhere, but my family,my kids and grand children are here. I wouldn't leave them and go live somewhere where I didn't know anyone. I just have to keep believing that it is possible to find love
here. If there's a will there's a way! | |
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| Location, location
Posted: 10/20/2009 6:37:53 AM | i have to live in a place that i love. all the single men in the world wouldn't make a difference if i had to live surrounded by asphalt.
i would make a move for work. but, again, the location would have to offer natural beauty, minimal development, clean water and low crime.
the question, i think, deals more with priorities and what you truly value. can you enjoy life on your own terms, or do you need a partner to share things with?
a year or so ago, npr had a report from some god-forsaken spot in south dakota where single men outnumber single women at something like 3-1 (as i recall). worth looking into, if you could stand living in a place like that. personally, i could never handle a south dakota winter | |
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| Location, location
Posted: 10/20/2009 6:40:42 AM | Yes, Ms Phoebe, but they typically don't sky dive over metropolitain TO. Open farm land surrounding an air strip is more suitable. Then again, I guess London has grown over the years and is the big city now.......
Do ladies in this age bracket really still think in terms of using a man for their pleasure to the extent that he has to come up for air? Are their any men out there that can still hack the pace (aside from me, of course...)? | |
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| Location, location
Posted: 10/20/2009 6:48:55 AM | ^^^^^
RG,
What a lovely thought. . .
On topic
I think that I would move for someone special, but not to meet someone special. In this era of communicating around the globe in seconds, I think that it is possible to fish outside one's "local" pond.
That being said, I would protect myself financially and probably rent out my house for a year, just as an escape hatch and, of course, tax right off.
But then again, I've moved for school and career and things have always turned out positive for me. | |
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| Location, location
Posted: 10/20/2009 7:02:22 AM | I'd move, and have. I lived in a large metro area, but met (online) the love of my life who lived in a small town out in the backwater of the state. I moved to be with her, but eventually we both moved to a somewhat larger town in another state entirely, for job-related reasons.
So, relocation isn't always necessary if you live in a small town, as someone may want to live where you do. However, most of the time your chances will improve greatly if you move closer to a larger city. | |
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| Location, location
Posted: 10/20/2009 7:11:33 AM | | It is always better to search in a target rich environment if one hopes to succeed at whatever it is one wants to accomplish. Certain large metropolitan areas are good for singles of either sex, others for men or women. For example, Washington, D.C. was a great place for single men when I was in my twenties and I met my wife there. I have heard New York City is supposed to be good for single women. Do an internet search to discover others. I have had to move several times for job related reasons. It can be difficult at first but after about a year one adjusts. Moves have always made life more interesting for me. It helps to be outgoing, by the way. | |
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