| Different approach to online dating
Posted: 10/24/2009 12:42:13 AM | Do you find that the longer you have been on dating sites the less likely it is that you will find what you believe you are looking for? Its not because there are less suitable candidates out there - its all to do with attitude I feel.
I found when I first started on one of these sites it struck me how negative, guarded, and distrustful many people were. I , on the other hand, was open and excited about starting a new adventure. Now I feel that I now have the tendency to treat dating almost like a chore and am starting to expect that nothing will come out of all this effort. I have not even had any bad experiences as a result of dating on these sites.
Are others having difficulty staying positive? | |
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| Different approach to online dating
Posted: 10/24/2009 1:18:43 AM | | I know its a lame topic but someone please reply. Especially since I wont get another email on POF now that I have (stupidly) given away too much information. | |
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| Different approach to online dating
Posted: 10/24/2009 1:21:18 AM | Ok looks like its me then.....
Its not because there are less suitable candidates out there
Yes it is actually. I have tried every single one of them (to varying degrees) and they are all dud's....give up now is my advice! | |
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| Different approach to online dating
Posted: 10/24/2009 1:34:53 AM | ^ it's totally true. Hilly tried me and I was an inconsiderate lover. I loved it too much but it's not about me. I think it important to understand this OP and you should put bisexual in your sexual prefences and show a bit of leathery kink on those pics to spice it up a bit. Hilly has the horse, Naamah well is just Naamah, LULT has those spectacles (sexeh), and I've got pajama pants. I won't mention about other guys here because I just don't want to explore myself that far but one has a plane (think mile high club) and Julian stole Michael Hutchience's face I think he's a necro. You'll get there. You need a theme. Whiney is a poor choice. A manager at work is whiney. She gives me bad rosters. I hate her.
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| Different approach to online dating
Posted: 10/24/2009 1:38:25 AM | OH these sites dont work for me cause i have toooo many choices 
but its still not enough ,apparently
no dont give ,just look around and wait and wait and wait ,and.......................... someone will come along
who am i kidding ,
get out now before all hope is lost  | |
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| Different approach to online dating
Posted: 10/26/2009 6:59:17 AM | Whats this dating every-one is banging on about.My shrink referred me here.She said your a whack job,i know this site you'll fit right in to.Gunna have to gets me money back.
Dating.... ....certainly a different approach thats for sure.I wonder if your actually supposed to like the people you date. | |
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| Different approach to online dating
Posted: 10/26/2009 7:34:56 AM |
negative, guarded, and distrustful I think its true that some people have a defensive approach but in many cases its because we've been burnt from the last relationship and scared of repeating mistakes.
Protective mechanisms show up in different ways. Some people avoid dating altogether while others start relationships and then get cold feet, over and over. Its fear.
I decided early on to give up on trying to be appealing in a general way and just tell it like it is. I've found some really good friends and can confidently say that this site does work. | |
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| Different approach to online dating
Posted: 10/26/2009 2:45:13 PM | Hey OP, I've found this site an absolute dud for meeting living, breathing, members of the opposite sex, even Hilly hasn't lowered her standards to my level yet! If I could just find that picture of me riding a horse.....
Having said that it gives great forum! So I just have to keep tuning in anyway. | |
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| Different approach to online dating
Posted: 10/26/2009 4:13:19 PM |
even Hilly hasn't lowered her standards to my level yet!
Nope...my bar is still raised.
That line would work far better if I was a man!
Maybe its time to stop trying........you might just be surprised by the result. | |
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| Different approach to online dating
Posted: 10/26/2009 4:55:51 PM | OMG I don't expect anything from this site except to have a few laughs in the forums..................you'll be setting yourself up for huge disappointments otherwise.................
I'm still thinking that Mr Perfect Match will stumble into me at the supermarket somewhere between the eggs and the coffee aisle...... | |
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| Different approach to online dating
Posted: 10/27/2009 12:06:35 AM | | Ther's every chance in a supermarket ... I don't know if it's the grumpy Mums and whining kids but men seem to spend a fair amount of time eying off unattached (they assume) women . I hate shopping but it livens it up no end when you catch a glimpse of a not beer gutted male copping an eyeful of you . Why do supermarkets bring out the pheremones ? | |
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| Different approach to online dating
Posted: 10/27/2009 12:31:26 AM |
Maybe its time to stop trying........you might just be surprised by the result.
Already stopped trying..... results identical!
And yup, if you were a man that line would be spot on. You know we only have enough blood coursing through our veins to supply the bar or the brain with oxygen. That's why so many of us have trouble remembering what you girls say to us! I had to laugh when Naked News used to be on Foxtel. You'd get to the end of the bulletin and wouldn't remember one thing that any of those girls said! | |
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| Different approach to online dating
Posted: 10/28/2009 3:58:57 AM | IMO its this medium that people ask for a perfect partner. THEY DO NOT EXIST. In the real world we are firstly attracted and then get used to someone, BEFORE, going out.
Stop asking for the unreal, tell the truth and enjoy some banter - expect nothing. See how you go | |
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| Different approach to online dating
Posted: 10/28/2009 9:56:58 PM | Don't give up Paul, I will personally choose someone from the huge crowd of women attending your party on Saturday night. Baz and I have already decide to prop, drink and observe, like the two old men on the muppets. leave it to us, we wont let you down    | |
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| Different approach to online dating
Posted: 10/28/2009 10:38:00 PM | I think people get into something with new hope not realising that there are many with lost hope who become bitter, angry, demoralising or just plain dishonest.
It is always best to meet people in the real life, as you are living your life, doing what you do. That way you tend to find someone similar to you, or more understanding and believing of you ...
When you don't know who it is on the other side of the PC ... it makes it hard.
There are a lot of people that hide behind a character or trait that isn't the real them.
Good Luck
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| Different approach to online dating
Posted: 10/29/2009 1:57:02 AM | Sometimes it is easy to forget that behind each profile is a human being who breathes, bleeds and has feelings, no different to you, the person reading this response. It is so easy to be cruel or hurtful on the 'net because ether allows to do what we would never do in the real world.
Our true characters are often revealed on the forums, as well as in the emails we send and receive, and yet, here we are, more focused on defence and suspicion when it would be far easier to simply be ourselves, and more importantly - our 'ideal' self.
If my attitude is one of mistrust and judgement, then how can I possibly expect anyone to trust or accept me for who and what I am?
I enter this ethereal world with the enthusiasm that I show in real life and my reward for this effort, which is no effort at all, is that I have met and made some wonderful friends. Maybe one day, who knows? I just may meet the man I will grow old with.
  Here's hoping! | |
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| Different approach to online dating
Posted: 10/29/2009 7:47:30 PM | | I hope this isn't correct , that would make me a geriatric,alcoholic nymphomaniac, I'm still working on that, maybe next year | |
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| Different approach to online dating
Posted: 10/29/2009 11:34:26 PM | re "why do supermarkets bring out the pheremones...?"
...maybe it's the celery, raw celery contains the male hormone androsomone to trigger female attraction,,,after a few bites his sweat glands start releasing the pheromone...it also acts to elevate mood in women.....gotta go, taking hoummus and celery over to the neighbour!!! ...lets see how she responds....hehe
or the ginger?? (see Dr Ava Cadell.."passion Power" ) | |
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| Different approach to online dating
Posted: 10/31/2009 3:46:06 PM | I think i'll be going celery shopping this weekend!
Back on topic I can relate to the OP's experiences. I ran into a number of serial daters during my first month on this site, most of them see dating as a sport and have little interest in finding something long term because they are always looking for the next best thing. It took me about 2 weeks to lose interest and stop sending first contact messages.....the supermarket, the line at the post office, public transport, and even standing at traffic lights waiting for the little man to turn green are hotbeds of activity when it comes to finding a date........oh there's also the lollipop lady at the local school that gives me flirty looks and body language but she's twice my age so i'm not going there!  | |
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| Different approach to online dating
Posted: 11/1/2009 4:20:31 PM | Rosie I love eating celery - it's actually my new favorite thing to stick in dips (particularly hommous) but how does it work with a female. Will I arouse myself? LOL
I'm so confused............... | |
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| Different approach to online dating
Posted: 11/1/2009 10:20:55 PM | Rosie
Maybe I should stand in the F & V section of the supermarket chewing celery and saying "wot's up Doc" to every good-looking female???? You think it'll help???
Tried that, didn't work, the only thing that went up was my iron levels!!!   | |
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| Different approach to online dating
Posted: 11/2/2009 4:29:36 AM |
Don't give up Paul, I will personally choose someone from the huge crowd of women attending your party on Saturday night. Baz and I have already decide to prop, drink and observe, like the two old men on the muppets. leave it to us, we wont let you down
thanks avril ,party was great ,yeah plenty girls came
But like i said too many choices
Just couldnt decide
guess i missed my chance
maybe next annual party | |
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