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Posted: 10/25/2009 9:15:55 PM | Ok, so here it is. My lover and i are living together. His friend broke up with his gf and is going through some stuff. Ok, so he is staying with us. We are short of space so he is sleeping in the same room as us. I don't mind helping someone in need, he has no money.... but the dude is always around. ALWAYS. He doesn't go out to look for work. He goes and sees some buddies, but only when my lover is gone to work. It is driving me CRAZY. We just can't have any alone time.
So I have tried hinting for him to go do something and he is not getting the hint. I don't mind that he is staying with us but C'mon! Us women need things too. What can I do? How can I solve this problem without causing problems and making my lover angry with me? | |
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Posted: 10/25/2009 9:19:00 PM | | dare I be bold enough to spell it out? Shag them both, win-win-win! Also there's a 19 year old virgin who rides horses as you and you could help her delemma. | |
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Posted: 10/25/2009 9:26:49 PM | Erotic fever.. wow.. what an invitation.
Start DOING your LOVER in front of him.. as you are getting naked.. turn around to the buddy and say.. Do you MIND? I want to F*CK your buddy withOUT an audience
OR.. Tell your lover.. either help your buddy or shag me. If you choose him.. I'll go down the the sleazy bar I met YOU at and find me a shag-mate to do me and do me HARD.
Trust me.. if you are a worthy shag.. your LOVER (see peni-of-the-day) will boot his buddy for the 3 min it takes him to get off..
Hey.. I just thought of this for an edit
Tell your LOVER that if he doesnt start shagging you till you cant walk.. you will let his BUDDY shag you.. cause you NEED HARD RICHARD pounding you..
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Posted: 10/25/2009 9:30:05 PM | | Meet privately with your boyfriend and come up with a "end date" on when the friend must leave. Have him tell his friend. | |
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Posted: 10/25/2009 9:32:56 PM | | talk to your man tell him how u feel n if he won't make a effort kick both of them out | |
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Posted: 10/25/2009 9:34:37 PM | | just do as you wish. as you say women need more. shag them both! | |
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Posted: 10/26/2009 12:01:53 AM | | Now you know why his girlfriend broke up with him, time for you to break up with him too. Give him 10 mins. to grab his stuff and get the hell out. | |
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Posted: 10/26/2009 12:52:21 AM | | Maybe he was hoping you and your lover bonk so he can watch LOL | |
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Posted: 10/26/2009 1:18:20 AM | OP, I feel for you, but think you may be screwed, and not in the good way. There is much danger in jumping in the middle of your BF's friendship. Personally I think if the friend is not even attempting to look for a job, that he is using the two of you and needs to go. But for some reason your BF is this guys friend, and he may "owe" him. This may make the situation very hard for your BF to break away from.
Proceed with caution! | |
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Posted: 10/26/2009 3:34:05 AM | | Sure seems to be a lot space in that room where you took your profile pictures. | |
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Posted: 10/26/2009 4:14:45 AM |
Sure seems to be a lot of space in that room where you took your profile pictures. You'd think that would be obvious to her too huh?  | |
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Posted: 10/26/2009 6:10:08 AM | | You're living with your "lover", you list yourself as single, just go ahead and do both guys. Make that boy work for his room and board. | |
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Posted: 10/26/2009 6:11:08 AM | Ask him to take the mattress at night into the living room. To me it would be totally unacceptable for another person to sleep in the same room as a 'couple'.
And no good just suggesting to him to give you some space you ACTUALLY have to say it! NO beating around the bush. Maybe he is trying to break you two up. Ask him to go out and look for a job. | |
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Posted: 10/26/2009 6:23:54 AM | Hinting doesn't work. You and your BF need to tell the mooch he needs to find a job and get his own place by such-n-such date. If he doesn't move out by that time or if your BF gets upset, then that's your cue to move out.
Does this mooch have no family or other friends for help or have they wised up to his lazy ways and already told him "No"? | |
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Posted: 10/26/2009 6:29:31 AM | Take all those stuffed animals into the living room and make a cot for him to sleep on....
Seriously - don't you have a sofa for this guy to sleep on so you can get some alone time with your BF? You're all sleeping in the same room? Pluh-ease.
I'm all for helping out a friend, but give him a time-frame to start paying or get out. Unless your BF is the one paying all the bills for the place you share. In that case, it's up to your BF how long he stays. Sorry. | |
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Posted: 10/26/2009 9:56:45 AM | | If you are paying half the rent then tell the deadbeat he has one week to find another flop house. He didn't crawl out of the ocean tell him to ring Mom or Dad for a bus ticket. | |
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Posted: 10/26/2009 12:13:02 PM | Gosh I feel your pain. Try living with the mother-in-law.
Anyway try to find out if the mooch has family like his parents he could go to. I've had to do that regrettfully with freeloading boyfriends. | |
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Posted: 10/26/2009 12:22:28 PM | | Place a DO NOT DISTURB sign on your bdroom door! | |
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Posted: 10/26/2009 12:28:40 PM | | Uh, tell him he's got 30 days, sign here;here and here and have all off his stuff by the front door until then. If he has a wet towel in the bathroom, on the floor at the front door. Shoes by the couch, to the front door. He will probably leave very soon thereafter but you must stick to the plan. | |
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Posted: 10/26/2009 12:35:48 PM | | Simple, STOP HINTING. This is not the type of stuff that they are going to GET. Other than, look George, you got until Friday to find a new place. End of story. | |
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Posted: 10/26/2009 12:40:48 PM |
Ok, so here it is. My lover and i are living together. His friend broke up with his gf and is going through some stuff. Ok, so he is staying with us. We are short of space so he is sleeping in the same room as us. I don't mind helping someone in need, he has no money.... but the dude is always around. ALWAYS. He doesn't go out to look for work.
and I bet you guys are feeding him too?? tell your boyfriend to get rid of the symbiont parasite.
this dude is moving in to his comfort zone. | |
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Posted: 10/26/2009 1:03:23 PM | Would just tell him, flat out how U feel. Him being your bf, or your bf's friend. He's not going to read your mind. And if U brood about it, your going to get more and more irritated about it. So just say it, but try not to be too harsh. Why cant he reschedule his visits, so everybody can be happy.
gd lk. | |
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Savona
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Joined: 7/14/2009
Msg: 24 | |
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Posted: 10/26/2009 1:08:02 PM | Oh gawdddd ...
Tell him there is a room at the Y.M.C.A.
He is a bum so why do you have to put up with that crap ... oh yea, you are in love.
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Posted: 10/26/2009 1:43:17 PM |
How can I solve this problem without causing problems and making my lover angry with me? Get your own apartment and move out. Simple. | |
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Posted: 10/26/2009 2:04:19 PM |
How can I solve this problem without causing problems and making my lover angry with me?
OP, are you contributing your share towards the rent, bills, etc? I'm rather surprised that you and your boyfriend didn't sit and discuss this friend moving in and all the related details prior to the fact, if you both live there and share the bills, but since it's a done deal now...
I would sit my boyfriend down, and ask him point-blank, how long is so-and-so going to be staying with us? For me, the answer "Until he finds blah blah" wouldn't cut it...I would expect it to be a set time period of a reasonable amount, say, one month. Since it's his friend, not yours, I would then expect him to sit his friend down and lay down the rules and the timeline to him, no ifs ands or buts.
I wouldn't be too worried about 'not making him angry' though; after all, it's your house too, and really, would you want this friend to still be sleeping in the same room as you six months down the road? | |
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