| My 4 year old son has imaginary friends...
Posted: 10/26/2009 9:46:36 AM | Is this healthy? Is it normal? The other day I was playing football with him, just throwing it around and stuff, then I left him for a couple minutes to attend to my daughter. Well then I look over at him, he's standing alone by a tree having this conversation with his "team". So I went back over to him to resume playing catch and he looks over his shoulder and says, "Come on team, let's go." It was kind of comical, so I went along with it and I asked him what his Team's name was and he told me that they were called "The Tubes" and he explained that his team was going to beat my team and all of that, so I played catch with him a bit more and he made this really nice catch and I said "Wow, nice catch." And he said "The Tubes win!" And he told me that the Tubes were better than my team, but not better than the Bears or the Packers. So I asked him if they were better than the Steelers and he said "Yeah, their better than the Stilwers".
On the surface this is all jus harmless fun, but because I dont get to see my kids everyday I wonder if this is symptomatic of some kind of void in his life. I worry that he isnt getting enough social interaction with kids his own age and he's developed an active imagination because of it.
*BTW, I tried to enroll him in a pre-school in August but his mother vetoed it, for reasons that are too selfish on her part to go into here. | |
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| My 4 year old son has imaginary friends...
Posted: 10/26/2009 9:52:38 AM | it's normal, my son had one when he was 2-3 or so, even had a name for him. I haven't heard about him in a while. I wouldn't worry about it.
Whether its root cause is symptomatic of something else, that's possible. But, we are talking about an entire team, while you're playing football. It seems to be appropriate doesn't it? | |
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| My 4 year old son has imaginary friends...
Posted: 10/26/2009 10:28:20 AM | This reminded me of my son's imaginary friend when he was little (he's all grown up now). According to my son he had "a man who lived in his (my son's) nose". He never really did say what the man who lived in his nose's name was...or if the man had a name. Just that he and the "man" would sing songs and talk together sometimes. Sometimes he would blame "the man who lived in his nose" for things missing or broken around the house. One evening at the dinner table I asked my son how his friend that lives in his nose was doing, as I hadn't heard about him for a while. My son, very casually said: "Oh, he died, so blew him out and threw him away". LMBO | |
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| My 4 year old son has imaginary friends...
Posted: 10/26/2009 10:50:44 AM | | I had an imaginary friend named Jake who lived in the basement of our house when I was growing up. Sadly, Jake disappeared when I started kindergarten at age five. I did ask a mental health professional about her thoughts on kids who had imaginary friends and her thoughts were that the child was probably just lonely and imaginary friends provided companionship for the child. It made sense in my case seeing as I was the youngest child, all my siblings were off at school and Jake disappeared once I started attending school. | |
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| My 4 year old son has imaginary friends...
Posted: 10/26/2009 11:48:36 AM | I never had imaginary friends, either. T.V ruined my imagination, I couldn't think of one, LOL.
But yes, it's completely normal to have one. Get him into a playgroup with other kids his age and I'll bet the imaginary friend and his team goes away. | |
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| My 4 year old son has imaginary friends...
Posted: 10/26/2009 12:27:51 PM | | It's normal. Children use alot of imagination when they play. I do like the ghost stories, though when there is a ghost of a child whom a living child plays with. | |
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| My 4 year old son has imaginary friends...
Posted: 10/26/2009 12:33:00 PM | | I find it hard to believe that you don't know about children's imaginations and the fun of imaginary friends! Are you serious? Yes, it's normal and healthy and I agree with your ex, he's 4 he doesn't need to go to school yet. If you really think your son has no chance to interact with other kids, set up play dates, take him to a popular park, etc., but don't make him feel weird about what is totally natural. It sounds like you need to learn to work with your ex, instead of looking for things she's doing wrong. | |
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| My 4 year old son has imaginary friends...
Posted: 10/26/2009 12:43:19 PM | I agree with everyone else here. Imaginary friends are healthy and normal. If you want to know more about them, I highly recommend "The Philosophical Baby" by Alice Gropnik at the University of California Berkeley. She says that " children from many cultures and backgrounds have imaginary friends and they are very resistant to adult influence. Older and only children were more likely to have imaginary companions than younger siblings but outgoing children surprisingly were also more likely than shy ones. Children who watch a lot of TV are also less likely. Imaginary companions seem to be more characteristic of children in general than of especially gifted or disturbed children."
Do you feel better now? | |
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| My 4 year old son has imaginary friends...
Posted: 10/26/2009 1:44:10 PM | Family story:
"Mommy, don't sit on that chair, you'll sit on Incumboolapotle!"
Mother, unable to repeat the name, gets on phone calls her sister-in-law: "Helen listen to this! "
Lifts Julie onto chair so she can reach phone. "Tell Aunt Helen who's on the chair. "
Loudly into phone, "I am, Mommy! "
I don't remember when Incumboolapotle disappeared from my life. Surely by the time I was eight.
My first son, who is now a rather well adjusted grownup (and plasma physicist) had a boon companion of the ethereal kind. My younger, louder, enormously less adjusted child (and artist) did not. Think it's just the luck of the draw, actually.
Your kid sounds happy and well adjusted. Enjoy!
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| My 4 year old son has imaginary friends...
Posted: 10/26/2009 1:48:35 PM | You mean imaginary friends disappear!!!!!!!!
It's the longest relationship I ever had and you're telling me it might not last!!!!!
As if I didn't have enough to worry about already!!!! | |
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| My 4 year old son has imaginary friends...
Posted: 10/26/2009 2:12:01 PM | Is it normal?
Yes, it's completely normal.
Why some (actually many) people think it's normal to have (an) imaginary friend(s) in adulthood also;)
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| My 4 year old son has imaginary friends...
Posted: 10/26/2009 2:30:22 PM | As far as I know, not one of my three children ever had an imaginary friend.
When I was a child and i am oldest of four, I didn't exactly have an imaginary friend, but always felt a very present invisible person by my side. Later, while still a child, I learned I was a twin and my twin was dead a t birth, so I always assumed that presence was my twin in spirit. Who I continued to feel all of my life.
MUCH, MUCH later, like 5 years ago, I learned my twin had actually been alive and adopted out. I have strangely not felt that presence much at all since then and I am still trying to find my twin. I do not even know for sure if it is a boy or girl.
I think imaginary friends are pretty common though and I find all of the possibilities interesting, from truly imaginary, to the spititual connection with a living person, spirits, angels or even ghosts.
My daughter from ages 2-5 spoke a language fluently that I still do not know if it is a real language or something she made up. She always said she just knew it because it was in her head. She was very consistent with it and taught a lot of it to me. That was kind of strange, but was very normal for her. I learned of it one night at dinner, when she just started spesking it and then had to translate it for me. When she started school, she left it behind.
Children are so much brighter and in tune with things much more than we give them credit for. I think there are all sorts of possibilities and much more than we like to think is reality, all being perfectly normal.
SS | |
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| My 4 year old son has imaginary friends...
Posted: 10/26/2009 2:50:48 PM |
Why some (actually many) people think it's normal to have (an) imaginary friend(s) in adulthood also;)
You'll find them in churches, mosques and temples all over the world. | |
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| My 4 year old son has imaginary friends...
Posted: 10/26/2009 3:04:48 PM |
This reminded me of my son's imaginary friend when he was little (he's all grown up now). According to my son he had "a man who lived in his (my son's) nose". He never really did say what the man who lived in his nose's name was...or if the man had a name. Just that he and the "man" would sing songs and talk together sometimes. Sometimes he would blame "the man who lived in his nose" for things missing or broken around the house. One evening at the dinner table I asked my son how his friend that lives in his nose was doing, as I hadn't heard about him for a while. My son, very casually said: "Oh, he died, so blew him out and threw him away". LMBO
That story wins this thread. Night everyone! | |
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| My 4 year old son has imaginary friends...
Posted: 10/26/2009 4:01:53 PM | You'll find them in churches, mosques and temples all over the world.
Dang! I was trying to slip that by innocently (or was I?) and now I'm busted:)
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| My 4 year old son has imaginary friends...
Posted: 10/26/2009 4:37:45 PM | my brother had a whole farm when he was about 5. he would talk about it all the time. one evening, as we drove through the countryside, we passed a huge farm. my brother said that was his farm. well, eventually, we saw the mailbox and it read 'johnsonbaugh.' well, by father said, 'this farm belongs to mr. johnsonbaugh.' my brother responded that he had recently sold it. | |
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| My 4 year old son has imaginary friends...
Posted: 10/26/2009 5:07:41 PM | | I think you could have a 'BIG' problem... THERE'S NO ONE BETTER THAN THE STEELERS... as to the imaginary friend... lots of children go through a stage like this... sometimes for years but usually goes away... Nothing to worry about... : ) | |
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| My 4 year old son has imaginary friends...
Posted: 10/26/2009 5:11:55 PM |
You'll find them in churches, mosques and temples all over the world.
Dang! I was trying to slip that by innocently (or was I?) and now I'm busted:)
Haha, I just had to be the bad guy, subtlety is lost on many theists. | |
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| My 4 year old son has imaginary friends...
Posted: 10/26/2009 5:24:26 PM | Watch the movie "Drop Dead Fred". It's a great movie.
Do some online research. I just Googled "Are imaginary friends healthy?" and got a plethora of results. Having an imaginary friend is healthy and shows a creative side in a young child. | |
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