| How important is facial attractiveness?
Posted: 10/26/2009 7:38:16 PM | I have come across numerous articles on the internet that state that we are biologically attracted faces with better features. First impressions are everything right? Hypothetically speaking let's suppose some guy in his late 30s or early 40s who is a certified flight instructor on his way to being UPS pilot, competes in Ironman's, climbs mountains, has served in the military, and is moderately socialble but very funny to be around, and has the highest respect for women and would treat his woman well, but let's just say this man has crooked teeth, a big nose, and non rubust jaw. Now the woman is obviously not going to know much about this person at first, but supposed she was at a party or outing and this guy approached her, isn't it possible that despite the good qualities of this man could mean nothing if his face is a turn-off? I've been told that it's confidenct that gets the woman, but in my opinion having good looks is basically the ticket to opening up any opportunites with women.
My no means am I a pilot, but I do currently serve in the Navy but consider myself on the low end of the attraction scale. The reason I ask this is I'm wondering if I should wait until I get my teeth straight and have my orthonatic surgery to approach women? I am fairly shy due to my looks, but I recently found out that the Navy is paying to have my teeth and jaw fixed and found out if I were to have this done in the civilian sector it would be 50,000-75,000 dollars, if not more due to the severity of my lacking chin and overbite plus crooked teeth. I was even told that my severe overbite and almost non existant jaw could have disqualfied me from military service. I can only imagine my side profile is not that attractive if my condition is bad enough to be a disqualifying condition for military service. The total treatment will take about 2 years. So should I wait until it's done to start asking girls out? With all these TV reality shows that reinforce the so called perfect image of the male being, it just seems to me that looks are very important. | |
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| How important is facial attractiveness?
Posted: 10/26/2009 7:43:38 PM | | Heres what I have learned hope it helps ...no matter what you like some will think you are gorgeous and others will think you are ugly.There are some people that a majority think are attractive but most of us fall in the other group the ones that can go either way....would be cool if you could find someone now and have them go through the process with you.... | |
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| How important is facial attractiveness?
Posted: 10/26/2009 7:47:06 PM | So very true, etourdi ~ I've been called both ugly and beautiful
Maybe it's the same for others as well
I agree with going with the upgrades ~ it must be uncomfortable having an uneven bite | |
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| How important is facial attractiveness?
Posted: 10/26/2009 7:53:45 PM | OPie, do as thee wishes. What *I* am missing in your profile is any interests/thoughts/activities that would appeal to your average female. Might could practice up on those while you're waiting. I know there are super-athletic women, and as it stands, that's the group you've confined yourself to. And it's an extremely small cohort.
Good luck!
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| How important is facial attractiveness?
Posted: 10/26/2009 7:55:15 PM | What those studies find is that babies are attracted to symmetrically pleasing faces. I really don't even know what that means since babies are attracted to their parents even if their parents are butt ugly, so take studies with a grain of salt.
I have a daughter that likes big noses on guys, I'm kind of drawn to baby faces, but neither of us have based to date or not to date on a man's face. We've both dated good looking and not good looking men. I do know that what many women find hot, I find boring and what I find hot many women think I'm nuts. Truly, attraction is in the eye of the beholder. Looks aren't important to me, but even if they were, it would still be about what looks I found attractive, not what some TV show thinks should turn me on nor what some other woman finds attractive.
Just don't waste your time on women who don't find you good enough, for whatever reason, and you should be fine. | |
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| How important is facial attractiveness?
Posted: 10/26/2009 7:57:35 PM | Take advantage of the treatment that is offered through the military it will benefit you cosmetically and improve your self-esteem. My ex did something similiar when he was active duty, its a great investment.
I would wait before you approach women, as you need to concentrate on you and building your self esteem first.
jmo... | |
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| How important is facial attractiveness?
Posted: 10/26/2009 8:01:31 PM | Thanks for your service OP.
We have all seen spectacular sirens with guys like woody Allen . Women are often far more forgiving than many of us are. You seem directed in life. You don't have a hump in the wrong place. Just be a man and if you have realistic expectations the right woman will appreciate it. | |
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| How important is facial attractiveness?
Posted: 10/27/2009 7:10:48 AM |
I do know that what many women find hot, I find boring and what I find hot many women think I'm nuts. Truly, attraction is in the eye of the beholder.
This is dead on!  @ daynadaze.
So should I wait until it's done to start asking girls out?
Look around you, there's most likely girls who like you that you haven't noticed..
With all these TV reality shows that reinforce the so called perfect image of the male being, it just seems to me that looks are very important.
Okay well first off, why do you want to look like the pretty boys on reality tv? You think every woman thinks their attractive...i think not!
Now the woman is obviously not going to know much about this person at first, but supposed she was at a party or outing and this guy approached her, isn't it possible that despite the good qualities of this man could mean nothing if his face is a turn-off?
Now do you really want the kind of women who won't even talk to you because you don't fit into their definition of pretty? I don't think so.. If you do then good luck with your new found "attractiveness"...Plastic surgery won't fix all your problems..it just puts them in a prettier box.Good luck!  | |
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| How important is facial attractiveness?
Posted: 10/27/2009 4:50:48 PM | Just like so many women hold their self esteem in their breast size and get implants, some want to "freshen up" their appearance from time to time
Orthodontics is considered cosmetic, I guess, but I think it's a good idea to have your teeth in alignment
I had a strange dream that I was going to have a nose job and just as the surgeon was about to do the procedure, I changed my mind ~ she tried to convince me to stay but I just got upset and started crying | |
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| How important is facial attractiveness?
Posted: 10/28/2009 6:48:55 PM | that's why so manypeople are single, eating alone , sleeping alone, dancing alone ,etc.
there was a dating show a few months ago on ABC "dating in the dark" it was very interesting. people would meet in a dark room to talk and play. at the end of the series the 3 couples would pick which person they wanted, the blindfold would be removed to see what the person looked liked. one out of three of the couples would show up on the balcony to be a "couple" and the other two would leave out the front door walking with their other partner left standing on the balcony. what happened was once the person saw what the other person looked like , they wasn't attractive to them for whatever reason but didn't have the heart/nerves to tell them to their face.
i think the show ended after about 4 shows. | |
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| How important is facial attractiveness?
Posted: 10/28/2009 7:48:41 PM | | As I say, no matter how outgoing, how supportive, how strong, how much money you make, loving, caring, etc, it seems as if your attractiveness is subpar if not way below average it's as if one's biological instinct is to reject that person. We may be a more intelligent species, we may reason, but it should be known that we share over 90 percent of the same DNA as any other organism on Earth. We are all governed by our roots to some degree. If looks weren't so important then why do people go out and spend thousands of dollars on cosmetic surgery. We may or may not please others with our sub Hollywood or Hollywood looks but it may bolster our self confidence so that we come across as more attractive. The day, that we can reason beyond our biological instincts and learn to love regardless looks would be like us being able to fly or walk on water on our own. | |
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| How important is facial attractiveness?
Posted: 10/28/2009 8:51:06 PM |
I recently found out that the Navy is paying to have my teeth and jaw fixed and found out if I were to have this done in the civilian sector it would be 50,000-75,000 dollars, if not more due to the severity of my lacking chin and overbite plus crooked teeth.
By all means get the work done. I didn't click on your picture but whomever gave you that estimate is probably hoping you will re-up or something.
My daughter's ortho was under $7,000 - with Blue Cross paying half. | |
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| How important is facial attractiveness?
Posted: 10/28/2009 9:24:04 PM | | I know having straight and aligned teeth will make it easier for me hold the breathing apparatus of scuba equimpment in my mouth. Not only does my teeth not look good but it does impair my speech and they have also determined that it may be causing me sleep apnea. I guess my jaw is far inward that it may be causing me sleep apnea. That may explain why I wake up like 10 time during the night. If they do sleep studies on me, I'm sure that is what is also driving up the cost. I cringe everytime the dentist who cleans my teeth tells me that it will completely change my appearance and give me that much more confidenc; it makes me wish I had the money to have all this done sooner. I dont' mean to sound pesimistic, but I do firmly believe that my facial appearance has hindered me immensily in my life and I will be so happy to get this underway and done with! How else can I explain why I am known by hundreds and I'm not joking, hundreds of skiers/snowboarders at a local ski area up in Washington state that I grew up skiing at on a daily bases as Ratboy. I eventually learned to live with it but deep inside it has haunted me my whole life. What's funny is more people know me as Ratboy at that ski area than my real name. I even had a backcountry run that was nicknamed after me called the "Rat Ramp". | |
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| How important is facial attractiveness?
Posted: 10/28/2009 9:47:34 PM | get it done while you can....and good luck!
i don't really care what the features look like... however teeth have to be healthy and white, your sense of style has to be presentable, hygiene, good posture, etc etc. are all deal breakers.
if you are the most handsome on earth with perfect everything, and you spend time posing and admiring yourself projecting arrogance, it would be a waste of time for both of us  | |
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| How important is facial attractiveness?
Posted: 10/29/2009 7:47:44 AM | First things first, reality TV by no means reflects the reality of the real world. Don't base your worth by what you see on TV.
I say go for the work since it will help you w/ your confidence some, but don't expect it to be a magic wand for all of your problems. The external can help improve confidence, but there is no surgery that can fix something broken inside your head.
Looks are important, but looks fade, so you need to have more to offer than just a pretty face. There are plenty of "unpretty" people that have confidence and success. Looks matter, but they are by no means the golden ticket to the good life.
Don't put your life on hold just because you are going to be getting some work done. That is as shameful as saying "I will start dating when I lose that extra 10lbs" or "I can start dating when I buy that new car" or what ever. Besides, what if you pass up on an really good oppurtunity because you are waiting to look better? If she likes you when you aren't at what you feel is your best, she'll still like you after you have improved yourself.
Besides, do you really want to be w/ some one who is so shallow as to write you off for not being 100% perfect? | |
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| How important is facial attractiveness?
Posted: 10/29/2009 6:59:23 PM | So much good stuff has been written on these subjects. Maybe I can suggest, you can the athletic activity and pick up some books! The knowledge in this area will empower you!
On a related topic. I'm surprised they haven't deleted your main picture for lack of a clear head shot. | |
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| How important is facial attractiveness?
Posted: 10/30/2009 8:46:05 AM | "let your beauty be not just the outward adorning of braiding the hair, and of wearing jewels of gold, or of putting on fine clothing ; but in the hidden person of the heart, in the incorruptible adornment of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is in the sight of God very precious." 1 peter 3:3-4 (Before You Do- Bishop t d jakes) movie (Not Easily Broken)
we need to stop looking at the package exterior but what's inside. | |
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| How important is facial attractiveness?
Posted: 10/30/2009 9:26:14 AM |
Heres what I have learned hope it helps ...no matter what you like some will think you are gorgeous and others will think you are ugly.There are some people that a majority think are attractive but most of us fall in the other group the ones that can go either way....would be cool if you could find someone now and have them go through the process with you.... I totally agree!
9 times out of 10 what my girlfriends find "attractive"....I wouldn't walk across the room to say hello to; and the men that I find attractive..."they" go....yukkkk, what do you see in him! | |
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| How important is facial attractiveness?
Posted: 11/1/2009 7:11:21 PM | If you're in the navy, compete in Ironmans, and climb mountains, you could be missing a face altogether and still have plenty of success with women. You're very masculine. That's really all you need. And the fact that you're funny on top of it should even be a bonus.
That's where being a guy is cool. It might be nice to have a face like Johnny Depp, but you don't really need one. Look at all those MMA fighters. Half of those guys are hideous looking. And the circumstances of their job typically make them uglier by the day. But they have all kinds of female admirers. Because they are extremely masculine. And women are drawn to masculinity. That's a basic law of nature.
If you are truly everything you claim to be in this thread, the only thing limiting you is your lack of self confidence, I promise you. You've already got everything else you need. Personally, I wouldn't even bother with getting your teeth fixed at all unless it's just something you want to do for yourself. But it won't make any difference between dud and stud. You've already got everything stud covered except for the necessary confident attitude.
I assume that's you in your picture. I don't have half as much going for me in the looks department as you do, and women are not exactly hard to come by. You could do wonders with what you've got.
I also wanted to add this.....
If looks weren't so important then why do people go out and spend thousands of dollars on cosmetic surgery.
Plain and simple because they are suckers that are caught up in a phony set of standards perpetuated by society. Man was made to attract woman simply by being man. It's supposed to be easy and natural because we all have the natural drive to procreate (well, copulate, but you get the picture). Society has turned the basic, natural, inherent concept of attraction into a very lucrative market. Promoting a mentality that it is necessary to buy things that you don't really need in order to fulfill a basic biological function that is really not much different than eating or sleeping. From a nature standpoint, spending lots of money on trying to become more attractive makes about as much sense as spending lots of money on trying to learn how to get better at eating. As if it were any harder than opening your mouth and putting food in it. Attraction is really designed to be the same way. Just as easy as going up to a woman and making her like you.
There is a slight double standard at work here as nature judges women a little more harshly on their actual looks than men but the principle is still the same. What creates natural attraction is embracing natural polarity. Masculine and feminine. A man in tune with his masculine nature will naturally attract women because nature has designed it that way. Just as a woman that is in tune with her feminine nature will naturally attract men.
The problem is that it's extremely easy to get separated from your natural polarity because of how society operates. Many of the modern social norms are designed in a way that curb, temper, or sometimes even completely forbid certain natural aspects of masculinity and femininity. And when you begin to listen more to society than to your own gut, you lose touch with your nature. You lose touch with your natural sexuality.
When women are shunned for wanting to stay home with the children instead of joining the workforce or men are shunned for playing the field instead of committing to a relationship, these are societal sanctions being imposed in an attempt to stifle what some consider to be the less desirable aspects of natural male and female sexuality. And it is extremely easy to become guilted into following these social rules rather than having the courage to stay true to yourself and listen only to your gut.
But this is also a big reason why a lot of people are not as happy as they could be. Because it's scary to reject the pack mentality and do what you truly want. It's much easier to convince yourself that what you want is wrong and conform to popular opinion.
Man, I didn't mean to write an essay there. I just noticed how long that was. Anyway, hope it was helpful.
Best of luck. | |
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| How important is facial attractiveness?
Posted: 11/1/2009 7:29:27 PM | I've ended up having wonderful relationships with men who, at first, I wasn't physically attracted to. After several times hanging out with them, they would be so funny and so interesting that I found myself absolutely taken by them... very attracted to them. Over time, thier looks didn't even play into account. I loved them for who they were, and of course, how they looked didn't matter one bit.
OP, if getting your teeth fixed will bring you that inner confidence you need to be happy with yourself, then I say do it. If your doing it for the sole purpose of getting a girl, don't waste your time. Better teeth aren't going to all of a sudden draw the ladies to your side.
Truly, attraction is in the eye of the beholder.
It's an old cliche, but it's very true. | |
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| How important is facial attractiveness?
Posted: 11/1/2009 8:16:28 PM |  Dear Glacier,
My sister and I are both in our 50's and have noticed that the interect in looks vs. character in both men and women has favored looks (both facial and body) as the years have gone by.
At age 10 my sister had braces (for two years followed by a retainer for another two years) to correct a severely crowded mouth and she tells me that it was the greatest physical gift our parents gave her. Over the years she got tons of complements on her teeth.
If the Navy will pay for it, why not? Be sure it is done with a dentist/orthodontist you are comfortable with. Ask around and get a second and third opinion.
Today they have "invisible" and behind the teeth braces.
Don't forget, if a lady is worth her salt, she will know that what is beneath the hair and between the ears (your character) is the most important thing of all.
Also, your efforts at improving your health and appearance will show that you are making all efforts at being the best you can be and that will show you have high self-esteem.
Good luck in your search for that special lady.
Yours truly,
Antonio Perez | |
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| How important is facial attractiveness?
Posted: 11/1/2009 8:31:44 PM |
but in my opinion having good looks is basically the ticket to opening up any opportunites with women.
Not with the women I know, and there are plenty of women in my life from age 2 to 76.
If I did a poll with all these women, the number one response to your statement above would be, baahaahaaa.
The women I know, look for a man who is sturdy in himself as an individual, and who isn't afraid of sharing himself (as he is) with those he encounters on a regular basis.
Stretch yourself just a wee bit Glacier, we all poop the same my friend, men and women?!
Don't take life soooooo seriously!  | |
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| How important is facial attractiveness?
Posted: 11/1/2009 11:12:56 PM | Well if I'm to believe what the men say in these forums on POF then facial attractiveness is no.1.
There was a thread about nice face or banging bod - which would you prefer if you could only choose one?
Most people, men and women, said a nice face. | |
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