| Would truly appreciate the help
Posted: 10/26/2009 9:53:54 PM | Up until the past few weeks I really didn't send out many messages. I've spent the past year of my life really focusing on myself, and whereas I've been "open" to a relationship, I haven't really LOOKED for one.
Now I'm in a good place, and ready to truly begin sharing my life with another person. I've sent out numerous messages recently and rarely do I get any responses.
My feelings won't get hurt by replies so brutal honesty is appreciated. Thanks in advance for any help and advice :)
One other question specifically for women...More often than not I see that my messages have been read, but they aren't deleted NOR replied to. They're just sitting there cluttering up someones Inbox LOL! Any insight as to why this happens the majority of the time? | |
|
| Would truly appreciate the help
Posted: 10/26/2009 10:03:17 PM | | Your profile is very specific about who you are and who you are looking for - therefore limiting a lot of people, it may also discourage people from responding as they feel they are not that person - but maybe they are close and you are missing out. You are clearly a smart man who knows what he wants so either be patient or widen your net a bit more and then narrow down from there. | |
|
| Would truly appreciate the help
Posted: 10/26/2009 10:49:26 PM | I enjoyed the read, thank you. Your Summer 2009 picture where you're facing the camera dead-on is a much better main photo. A great one would be that same picture with a big smile.
The 'read'/not deleted messages are there for a couple of reasons, usually. Often, the lady is deciding if she will respond. Or - she's already corresponding with someone else and wants to see if that goes anywhere first. If not, you're Plan B. Or - she's just lazy and gets off seeing how many men she can leave hanging. If no response in a week and she's been online (you can tell when you do a search) you can send a follow up note. Simply - "Hi - I imagine you've been busy. If you'd like to talk, I'd be happy to say Hello". Then delete the sent message. If she responds, great. If not, next.
You'll need to delete all but the absolute dealbreakers on your email settings. Must not be married, do drugs, looking for intimate encounter. Everything else is negotiable.
If you're concerned about how your introductory messages may be being perceived, feel free to use my profile as a test sample and send me a practice message for private comment. No charge. | |
|
| Would truly appreciate the help
Posted: 10/27/2009 12:15:35 AM | I think it’s great, your pictures are good, you explain yourself well, I love your humor, but you didn’t say a lot on who you are looking for.
If I had met your criteria on the mail settings, I would have emailed you back.
To answer your question on the read/not deleted messages, I am guilty of that and I’m not sure why. Maybe the intention is there to get back to that person, but it never happened. I will fix my ways, though. Good question. | |
|
| Would truly appreciate the help
Posted: 10/27/2009 2:07:47 PM | Lot's of interesting comments and advice. I truly appreciate it all. I had not looked as my profile as being too restrictive so I have gone in and loosened it up a bit. I plan on following some of the other suggestions as time allows, but sooner rather than later.
1. YOU GO FIRST, I will shoot you a message so you can see how my typical responses are. A sincere thank you for taking the extra time :)
2. ILikeBeingMe, you should be able to message me now as I loosened up the restrictions. To be honest I never realized they actually blocked users from sending messages as I've never attempted to message someone who had a restriction I didn't fit LOL.
3. Trixie-Doo, not too harsh at all. I appreciate and prefer honesty over anything else. No one wants to think of themselves as unattractive, but I'd rather not be in self denial either! We are what we are :) | |
|
| Would truly appreciate the help
Posted: 10/27/2009 4:41:02 PM | Give yourself a chance, jeez! You look sad in the main pic, you say you're lost, you appear to need rescuing and the girls - don't do "rescuing". Smile, be positive, lose the pictures of your kid (please - it's just wrong to post pics of children on dating sites), lose the shirtless pic - they're not allowed. Take off your hat and SMILE! Wear an entire shirt! And ignore advice from guys like Trixie (?) his profile is nasty and he hasn't bothered to post a pic - for which I for one am thankful.
Good luck! | |
|
Home
login 
