| Retire from looking for love on POF and now on the Forum
Posted: 10/26/2009 10:12:03 PM | Did we all do that, give up looking for love on POF because nothing yummy was biting?
We have here a pond full of fish looking for the same thing, and we pee in the same water and sometimes sniff the same air when we surface but often we find ourselves at the shallow end of the pond where we find the Forum. It sure is alive and kicking here. We all have something to say and are trying to be useful, (Haha).
So are we too picky why we give up?
Did other people's bad experiences on the site put you off to keep looking.
I have my profile up still and every now and then a stray would wander in for a bit of a nosy, not enough to charge for door entry LOL
I remember being excited when I first put a profile up, I would pop in often just to see who wuvs me LOL. These days I just come straight to the forum to read and add my bit.
Cheers! | |
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| Retire from looking for love on POF and now on the Forum
Posted: 10/26/2009 10:15:52 PM | Hmmm wow you jumped early was it 9-09... I waited a year, then thought dang I am done with this, life is pretty good as a single person, so I guess single it is...
Then I gave one last over, and that is now history....
Patiences sometimes pays off...
Good luck | |
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| Retire from looking for love on POF and now on the Forum
Posted: 10/26/2009 10:24:16 PM | I have been on enough dating sites in the last 10 years to know when I came here that I was wanting to use the forum sections and nothing else. I really don't care if I never go on another date again, not because of dating site failures  but because I am too damn tired to date anymore.  | |
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| Retire from looking for love on POF and now on the Forum
Posted: 10/26/2009 10:24:47 PM | | I also go to the forums. I have stopped looking and writting in the POF profile section. Its just a waste of time, writtting, waiting and getting no where with my efforts. I dont think establishing a relationship was meant to be this hard and this much effort. It is a good means for those that find this sort of introduction a useful way of meeting but, I need more human interation, where there are actually people there in real life, like a meetup group, a singles social, ect. Profiles and meeting jst not for me. I did say hello to someone via the forums who I find very attractive and sounds nice but I have no idea what she thinks of me and she lives half way around the world, not that realistic to think our real live paths will ever cross. This is the reality of life, you usually end up with someone near by and live a convient life with someone compatable. | |
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| Retire from looking for love on POF and now on the Forum
Posted: 10/26/2009 10:41:15 PM | | I haven't 'given up', I just accept the reality that makes up dating sites. I still check, and if someone catches my interest I'll drop a note to say hello or whatnot. As mentioned I don't hold my breath and just take things as they come. If something happens, online or off, it's likely to just happen moreso than my making it happen per se. | |
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| Retire from looking for love on POF and now on the Forum
Posted: 10/26/2009 10:57:44 PM | Well Wild-1 its very fitting for me that you started this thread. Just today I decided to stop looking and ONLY go to the forums! (Haha today was the day I admitted that in my mind) But actually I have been spending ALL my POF time here in forums. so much so that the one guy I was chatting with sent me an email jamming me about HOW MUCH TIME I SPEND ON POF. alas I figured out he was a freak.... we were only emailing NOT even real phone calls. geeee whiz.
So its all about the forums for me. | |
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| Retire from looking for love on POF and now on the Forum
Posted: 10/26/2009 11:03:09 PM | It's not that I gave up per se...it's just that this is not for me. When I first came here almost three years ago at the urging of my oldest daughter, I was fairly new to the Internet and I didn't even have an email account - I had no idea what dating sites, forums, blogs, chats/chat-rooms were all about - this was like a brand new world to me. And since I'm a loner and an introvert by nature and because I was off work at the time and seriously missing the social aspect of my job, I took to this place like a fish takes to water:)
But the dating/profile/emailing side of it got old real quick - I think I hid my profile and had not single/not looking within the first six months of joining. I did meet with a few guys in the beginning but...no cigar. To be honest, I wasn't ready to meet anyone and I'm sorry I wasted their time - hopefully they have forgiven (and forgotten all about) me.
I deleted my original profile before the summer, thinking I wouldn't be back but here I am, like a stain.
The thing is the forums are addictive and I found myself spending waaaaaaaay too much time here; it got to a point where I was doing little else. Now that I know and have admitted my addiction, it is something I have to be mindful of. And I was doing pretty good up until a few days ago, posting only occasionally and not getting embroiled in any "heavy" discussions and then bam just like that, I fell off the wagon:) 
Anyway no, I haven't given up, honest...I really am looking for a 99 year old non-smoker, non-drinker yada yada yada type of guy.....ya know one?
Sorry for the ramble by the way...it's 02:03 here and like a true addict, I'd rather be here than go to bed any day. Unless of course some hot 99 year old made it worth my while....hmmm...now there's a thought eh?
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| Retire from looking for love on POF and now on the Forum
Posted: 10/26/2009 11:22:58 PM | It is the forums and the forums seems alright.
I wanted chat too. But they already told me chat is out of the question.
So forums it is and it's ok.
So let's post and get our post deleted sometimes and sometimes not.
It's all good. | |
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| Retire from looking for love on POF and now on the Forum
Posted: 10/26/2009 11:29:00 PM | I've been on POF on and off for a few years, ...each time I come back, I always find myself on the forum. I like the forum but sometimes it gets repetitive, too serious, boring, and some just forgot to smile before they log onto the site. We all know life is tough and a smile can spruce up your spirit to last you a while.
I admire a lot of contributors on the forum,.. love their thoughts on any topic, their intellect, caring, maturity, and I often found myself looking up their posts to read.
We are lucky we are rich with all sorts of information or ideas people share on relationships or other. You might not apply it for yourself but it is great to hear what others think about the same topic.
Nevermind me, I have my serious moments but most of the time I am just being silly. I could never hurt a fly but dammit I get peeved when some people are plain ding ding. LOL | |
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| Retire from looking for love on POF and now on the Forum
Posted: 10/26/2009 11:39:25 PM | OMG! Look for someone on the internet? You can't be serious.
When my marriage entered full throttle demise, I'll admit to being titillated for a spell when I came on here. What's this? You mean I can jump on the internet and peruse available women while listening to music, sipping a martini, and scratching my arse? What's not to like about that?
Not. It got old as fast as raw meat in the hot sun. Besides, at the time I wasn't really ready for much of anything. I'm a bit of a forum junkie, as you can probably guess. My work and principle hobby keep me near a computer a lot when I'm inside, so a message board was kind of a nice diversion for me when things got slow. I used to post on another political/cultural message board the last few years, but I tired of it. It was like a verbal blood-sport. I got kind of good at it, but then they just keep coming at you harder.
So I started posting here off an on instead the last year or so.
My profile is hidden, and I pretty much have nothing written about me on it now. I did send off 4 or 5 flirts this summer to people. The weather was great outside, and I thought it might be nice to hang out and have some fun under the sun with someone. Nothing came of it, and that's pretty much been it for me since.
I'm not adverse to meeting someone interesting online, but I don't put d*ck into it (no pun intended). I prefer real life for such a thing. I do really enjoy some of the posters/personalities on this site. Seeing what a recluse I've allowed myself to become the last few years (kind of weird for me), I guess this is a bit of an outlet for certain mental energies.
That's about it. Fvck me and the mouse I rode in on. | |
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| Retire from looking for love on POF and now on the Forum
Posted: 10/27/2009 12:28:16 AM | | I guess after a while you do start to get bored of the same old same old and think you need something different so you come to the forums. Or in my case i just thought that it isn't my time to meet someone yet so i thought i will have a break as it has been a bit tiring doing the same thing and just come back to it later. | |
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| Retire from looking for love on POF and now on the Forum
Posted: 10/27/2009 3:37:05 AM | | I just would like to know if this is a dating site, how come we all go into the forums? I check who viewed my profile often and wonder why no messages. Are people shy? Then, why are they here? It is easy for anyone to say whatever on the computer. Afterall, it is just typing words onto a screen. At times I feel that the old fashion way of meeting someone is the best - you can look at their face and see their expressions. Most importantly you can see their eyes - that is where you can find the truth. After reading this post, I know that there are others out there that have similar experiences as me. | |
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| Retire from looking for love on POF and now on the Forum
Posted: 10/27/2009 4:16:53 AM | i "gave up" after an entire 20 minutes, because that's all it took to figure out what a social wasteland the cornfields of northeast indiana are, at least for dating.... and that includes fort wayne, the nearest [*cough*] "city". that's okay, i like me some forums.... you people crack me up!
i can't speak for anybody else but i'm not "too picky"... but hey! no bible bangers, rednecks, functional illiterates and room temperature IQs, harley riders, NASCAR fans, or big damn pot bellies.... is it MY fault if the greater fort wayne metropolitan area has the market cornered??? a girl's got to know her limitations... plus i'm completely comfortable with the idea of being alone for as long as that's what's in the cards for me (um, the rest of my life?? oh, ok, lol!). and in spite of my sarcasm, there's lots of upside to living out in the boondocks (yeah lots, like solitude, surrounded by beautiful nature and peace & quiet, and doing what i want, when i want to.... i'm just a 21st century Thoreau with a computer and central AC).... IMO, a much saner viewpoint to take than to start having all these semi-desperate thoughts and feelings about being alone and needing somebody to "complete" you. [omg:barf]
also i'm not persuaded one way or the other about others' bad experiences. their experiences... not mine... seems like a really odd choice to make... why would anyone be put off by others' bad experiences??? if you're going to make personal choices on that basis, why not be encouraged by others' good experiences? the whole question is just weird, but thanks for asking
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| Retire from looking for love on POF and now on the Forum
Posted: 10/27/2009 7:42:06 AM | Like most here in the forums, I don't invest much time in the dating side of the site. The forums provide great insight into the individuals here and I've had far better friendships develop from ideas that we've shared in the forums. They also serve as a warning to winnow out those who cannot "get us" in our curmudgeon years.
I've been on and off paid sites for the last few years, relying on that old luck and timing thing in hope of that last great love of life. Had a few near Ms. experiences, but tired of the dating aspect and more focused on friendship that may grow over time. My sister and several friends HAVE had quite good luck and timing on places like match and yahoodom. Sister Jo is now into her 5th year of ridiculous happiness with her match mate.
I think the difference between free sites and paid sites is that people are more invested in trying for a positive outcome when they pay to try to find their soul kin. On free sites we get what we pay for. There are lots of skittery, skeardy fishes in this pond. Budding friendships seem disposable and cheap as communications abruptly cease and they move on down the pool. The term POF itself implies the disposable nature of relationships. Of course the "futility bills" of paid sites are no guarantee of success, but I think the odds are better given what I've seen among my friends. It's all luck and timing folks. The older and more set in our ways, the more baggage we secretly stow behind us, and the more particular we become in what we desire, make the quest for love a bit more daunting, but giving up is rather silly.
I recently met a couple in their 80s that were acting like teenagers giggling and being publicly affectionate. I had to inquire as to the secret of the longevity of their love. They both giggled and admitted that they just met a couple months ago on a paid site. | |
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| Retire from looking for love on POF and now on the Forum
Posted: 10/27/2009 3:31:08 PM | Did we all do that, give up looking for love on POF because nothing yummy was biting?
Active forum participation does not equal giving up.
More, like it helps pass the time.
We have here a pond full of fish looking for the same thing, and we pee in the same water and sometimes sniff the same air when we surface but often we find ourselves at the shallow end of the pond where we find the Forum. It sure is alive and kicking here. We all have something to say and are trying to be useful, (Haha).
Agree we are in the same pond, but everybody is looking for something and someone different.
So are we too picky why we give up?
People that give up do so because its their nature to do so, not because they are picky.
They tend blame their lack of success on everything but themselves.
Did other people's bad experiences on the site put you off to keep looking.
No, but they do keep me amused. | |
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| Retire from looking for love on POF and now on the Forum
Posted: 10/27/2009 4:47:26 PM | | I have moved on from looking for love, period, but I think the internet is a poor place to find it reguardless. Be it on POF or any other dating site. They are made up of people who are unable to connect or entice someone in person, and that concerns me. If I ever do get into the dating scene again, it will be in person and not on the internet. You watch porn and buy stuff without paying state tax and order pizza online, not get a girl/guy. | |
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| Retire from looking for love on POF and now on the Forum
Posted: 11/4/2009 11:30:41 PM | It is easy to hook up with anyone you find interesting in your city on POF but interesting is where it ends. I turned to the forums because it is not as frustrating to weed through the profiles LOL. From my observation of the contributors on the forum, I admire alot of them and like what I see in them but pity they don't live in Australia.
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| Retire from looking for love on POF and now on the Forum
Posted: 11/5/2009 12:35:54 AM | The fourms are a good way to get to know people better. The bedroom is the best.
There are no forum users that I have seen who live around me. Well, there is one. After reading her posts, I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole. | |
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| Retire from looking for love on POF and now on the Forum
Posted: 11/5/2009 9:19:52 AM | Yup - i've given up looking for that love connection online for sure.....as I find real life offers better rewards in terms of quantity and quality.
Forums are good, but really, having been a long time user I can tell you that they are a pale shadow of what they used to be... | |
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| Retire from looking for love on POF and now on the Forum
Posted: 11/5/2009 9:54:56 AM | | I skipped the looking part and came straight here 4 years ago, lol. But for me no good ever came from looking. I go with the flow, and whatever happens happens. I'd rather accidentally find someone and otherwise spend my time with things I can control. | |
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