| 45 PLUS - WHAT CAN YOU BRING TO THE TABLE?
Posted: 10/28/2009 2:27:59 AM | | Saw this forum on the USA site and it made for interesting reading. At 40 plus most people who have been married, separated and divorced will have gone through the financial struggle of trying to come to a settlement. Men may be supporting their family and yet having to pay for a 2nd home for themselves. Women may be working full time to pay the mortgage and look after the kids. No doubt most people who have gone through this will have struggled at some stage to make ends meet. Then finally the dust settles and both separated partners go their own way to maintain their homes and their own individual security. A topic most of us might avoid to discuss but one that is very important in the great scheme of things. So when it comes to dating is it a vital factor for you that meet someone of equal financial means? Or would you let love take over regardless? What about the kids inheritance, would you think about this when love meets you at the door - or simply close the door? | |
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| 45 PLUS - WHAT CAN YOU BRING TO THE TABLE?
Posted: 10/28/2009 7:12:14 AM | | As a divorced woman looking for that special someone to live the second half of my life with....This is me-take it or leave it. I feel it two people are attracted to each other and a mutual bond is created between them, then why worry about "what can you bring to the table" Things always have a way of working out(whether right or wrong) | |
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| 45 PLUS - WHAT CAN YOU BRING TO THE TABLE?
Posted: 10/28/2009 7:12:35 AM | | Dear op, I am interested in this topic as it has crossed my mind a couple of times. If you both have children, What would be the smart thing to do regarding inheretance? as I am sure my parents would want a portion to go to my children. How do prenump divide equally for new loves, starting a new life together. Time stipulation?? (after 10 yrs ) You keep yours and I keep mine?? Loss of everything or anything, if caught cheating. I' m asking is this is too far off the page or just prudent thinking? | |
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| 45 PLUS - WHAT CAN YOU BRING TO THE TABLE?
Posted: 10/30/2009 10:46:10 AM | | As far as inheritance and finances, I think following the same logic that depending on each State the divorce laws ascribe too and that is : 1) whatever you built before you were married ie. equity, savings, investments, etc remain yours and your biological childrens vis a vis 2) whatever you build within the relationship becomes equal property to be distributed according to said persons Will.. | |
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| 45 PLUS - WHAT CAN YOU BRING TO THE TABLE?
Posted: 11/17/2009 12:11:15 PM | | what inheritance???? strugle makes us stronger in the end. at the very least it teaches us what NOT to do. love comes when you're NOT looking for it. how much money a person has or has not is really not the issue. is it REALLY LOVE? ... THAT is the real question. | |
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| 45 PLUS - WHAT CAN YOU BRING TO THE TABLE?
Posted: 11/18/2009 3:40:03 AM | This is something I have thought about a lot too. I am amazed to see some mature people don’t give this much thought and boy can they come unstuck, seen it with a lady friend of mine. She was 51,had a great job , her own apartment and although single her future looked secure and bright. She fell for a younger guy on line (nothing wrong in that in my book), sold her place ,moved to North of uk rented/ shared with new fella, no job up there money started to run out, relationship soured, split, Back down south struggling to get a job and now looks like she’ll be in bedsits for the rest of her life.always one months rent away from the streets.Absolutely tragic.
As for me male at 57, I am no catch material for a woman. Have virtually accepted the fact that I will remain single for the rest of my life. Reason….I have a beautiful home in a fabulous location which I adore, rented but secured for life. I have everything I need. A very full and interesting life but of very modest means. If I met a woman what would I do. Firstly from my point of view I would NEVER want to give up what I have ( waited many many years to be in my current situation). And then the woman probably owns her own home and may have other finances etc. Shes not going to give that up is she??. What do we do. My sister told me what she thinks the answere would be…If I moved in with a woman like I’ve just described she would have to sign over half the house etc then you would be both equall if you split..however, you both would probably not have enough to get a new house individually…and so the debate goes on and on lol. So I am now just trying to get female company wherever and when ever I can ..It will just have to do lol. Happy days! lol. | |
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| 45 PLUS - WHAT CAN YOU BRING TO THE TABLE?
Posted: 11/18/2009 6:59:15 AM | | There lies the problem POSTINGS - "if I move in with a woman" consider what you have said here as a woman will also have the same reservations as you have about allowing you to move into her home with the possible risk of loosing half of it to you down the line should things not work out. Then what - you still have you house to go back to but she could loose half of hers if she were not careful. I agree with you it does make it a little more complicated for people who have worked hard to secure their homes to consider inviting someone to share it with and run the risk of common law rights. So what is the alternative - stay solo and happy or each keep their own home, one may have a home and the other may well not and this can be an even bigger problem - any legal eagles out there who can offer some good advise on this subject? | |
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| 45 PLUS - WHAT CAN YOU BRING TO THE TABLE?
Posted: 11/21/2009 3:05:25 AM | If you put conditions on love can you call it love? Conditional love? Can that work in the long term? Annie you appear to be more wrapped up in what material possessions a potential mate has that what emotional possessions they have, which means more to you?
When I get to 45+ I hope to offer nothing more than companionship, if I want to buy a woman by offering a big house and a nice car, etc. I'll look for someone a lot younger than 45. No offence intended. tbh I personally dont care what possessions a woman has as long as we get along and she has the ability to smile and enjoy life. | |
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| 45 PLUS - WHAT CAN YOU BRING TO THE TABLE?
Posted: 11/21/2009 5:47:38 AM | Believe me I am not a bit materialistic. Guess perhaps caution does play a big part here. Perhaps as you get older you will understand
Skinsizeings - you know what they say " you can't put the price of experience on young shoulders" and this is indeed very true. I agree with you, for sure " you can't put conditions on love" and who would want to. Being careful not to get caught up in the material side of life is important equally is the importance of not being taken for a mug too! It is getting the balance as you get older, meeting an equal in every sense of the word........... don't think that is too much to ask for? | |
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| 45 PLUS - WHAT CAN YOU BRING TO THE TABLE?
Posted: 11/21/2009 8:31:38 AM | | So the situation then is Annie,,,,,,, on ballance as you get older it is more difficult for the average person to get into a new relationship..'FACT'. | |
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