| If you never had kids, how do you cope with a partner who does?
Posted: 10/31/2009 4:19:05 AM | I haven't had kids but I see that some of the most open and balanced women are divorce with kids. How do you cope suddenly having 2, 3 or more kids around and did you get sidelinedjavascript:smilie(' ')? Do such hookups succeed or should the childless chase the childless and vice versa? | |
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| If you never had kids, how do you cope with a partner who does?
Posted: 11/2/2009 6:52:58 AM | Its really up to you peabeau as a personal preference.
I'm a single father and I have tried seeing girls that don't have kids without much success.
The reason why... because, if I am out on a date and I get a call about my child, I will my leave my date in a heartbeat to be by my childs side...
If you can understand this, you may have better success than I have had.... good luck | |
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| If you never had kids, how do you cope with a partner who does?
Posted: 11/2/2009 5:21:44 PM | ^^^ Crikey! That's a lot of threads on the 'partners with kids' problem!
I'll answer this thread though, because it's the one in front of me.
Now, the only possible solution when involved with someone who has kids at home is send the little sweethearts away to boarding school.
Somewhere far, far away.
Preferably in another country.
Since I've sorted out the problem for everyone who is encountering this dreadful situation we need not discuss it any longer. My wise (and sapient) advice is the definitive and final word on the subject.
Now, let's have no more threads about it, ok? | |
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| If you never had kids, how do you cope with a partner who does?
Posted: 11/3/2009 12:44:20 AM | I'm not in this situation at all and I'm A LOT younger than anyone that will reply but I'll give my thoughts and two cents to this topic.
It's all about you, your personal preferences, your wants and your needs.
There's nothing wrong with it at all.
If they "kids" are 18+, just see them as friends and keep a positive relationship with them and they'll leave you alone.
And if they are much younger, I'd assume it'd be like adopting but not getting too attached depending on the situation.
But in any situation, be yourself.
Don't try to be better than their real father figure, it's no competition, but support them and your partner because their approval will reflect back on the relationship.
If you would like to have your own children, that's a topic you and your partner should consider.
But it's really up to what you can tolerate and your interests.
It could be fun and it could be hell, it could be happy and it could lead to jealousy.
But it doesn't hurt to try.
Take care and I hope your topic gets sorted :) | |
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| If you never had kids, how do you cope with a partner who does?
Posted: 11/3/2009 1:04:22 AM |
Adoption works better in my opinion.....
Hmmm, I see your point.
But really, come to think of it, adoption is not the best option either. I believe the little blighters have certain rights even then.
How bout the white slave trade? | |
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| If you never had kids, how do you cope with a partner who does?
Posted: 11/3/2009 1:52:26 AM |
But it doesn't hurt to try
Sadly it can hurt to try. Kids, especially between the age of 4 and 16 need to be given as much distance as possible. Numerous studies, recent ones from the AIFS indicate that a poor relationship with a new partner can have a long term impact. Even if the relationship only lasts a short time.
I tend to favour parents with kids, they do have an understanding that most non parents don't. Either way it's an issue that needs to be treated with a great deal of caution. | |
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hunyy
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Joined: 10/27/2009
Msg: 13 | |
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| If you never had kids, how do you cope with a partner who does?
Posted: 11/26/2009 2:59:40 PM | They succeed if you realise you are a visitor in their home....for at least a year!
You let her do the chastising...and governing the kids.
Observe....learn...and learn where you can fit in.You have to learn to like the kids too.
lf you think this is all about you getting it on with athe mother ...think again
Her kids will come as first priority...and in the bigger picture youre a blow in.
lt takes time...and you better be genuine.
You have to ACCENTUATE her life....and in return you will have yourself a great lady.
Forget the shagfest you may have started it off to be ..if that was the case.
ln a mothers world...most are getting real about it.You are just another new face hanging around.What do you offer her to ease the load???
Because IF youre just there like a piece of furniture....it wont last. | |
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