| Warning! Highly dangerous profile, avoid!
Posted: 11/1/2009 2:36:47 AM | | Hey you were warned! But obviously you’re the type who laughs in the face of danger, a ballsie individual with a reckless devil may care attitude, you're the type who loves a challenge the type that never runs from a fight, a two fisted hard drinking.........hey am I laying this on a bit thick? Go on then give it your best shot I can take it! | |
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| Warning! Highly dangerous profile, avoid!
Posted: 11/1/2009 3:28:59 AM | Hi Robbie,
Right! Your profile photos aren't bad but they're a little fuzzy, plus they look a little posed. If you've got any clear headshots, one of them added in would be perfect :)
I like your description, it's funny :) but it doesn't actually include much about you as a person! You've got no interests listed, nothing in your description about what you enjoy doing or who you're looking for, and no first date ideas. Although the humour is great, it doesn't tell a woman anything very useful.
So bite the bullet send me a message giving your vital statistics.....um...I mean details, and leave the rest to me. You can be sure that however dumb your profile however laughable your photo I'll do everything I can to keep a straight face!
I don't like this line much, it's not as light as the rest of it somehow and it suggests, although I'm sure you didn't mean it to, that you think most women who get in touch with you are going to be less attractive and verbose than yourself.
I'd cut out the last two paragraphs and add in one with some more detail about yourself and what you like doing, and then another one about what you're looking for in a woman/relationship. Then actually fill in the interests and first date boxes, properly. Having a half-finished profile makes it look like you couldn't be bothered to think about it seriously.
Good luck :) | |
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| Warning! Highly dangerous profile, avoid!
Posted: 11/1/2009 3:35:37 AM | Hey,
Your request for a profile review made me think you posted in the wrong forum. You need better pictures that are not blurry. Preferably the standard close up smile always works. You are very creative and your profile start very well but this line needs to be deleted, "This is a red hot bodice ripper of a profile full of thrills passion lust and romance with a couple of buxom dark eyed gypsy wenches thrown in for good measure Grrrrrrr!" Despite the fact that you are trying to be clever, I don't think anyone wants to hear someone refer to women as wenches.
Lose all references to women as wenches it comes across as sexist. If you have a razor sharp wit then by all means prove it instead of saying it. Where you say ignore all the other guys and proceed to make fun of them will not buy you any points. Doing that is highly negative and all profiles need to be one hundred percent devoid of negativity. Profiles aren't in competition with each other. All of us guys are just trying our best to sell ourselves.
Your last line is so misogynistic that I had my jaw drop to read it. Upon reading your last line my only advice is to rip down your profile and stop hating women. Then and only then maybe you'll get some responses. | |
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| Warning! Highly dangerous profile, avoid!
Posted: 11/1/2009 5:00:29 AM | ^^ Yep, the last line is not in the least bit favorable to you or how you view women.
Also, these little guys are your friends:
, ; : .
They need to be included in your profile at various points. Your best bet is to put it through MSWord and it will help you with the punctuation errors. | |
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| Warning! Highly dangerous profile, avoid!
Posted: 11/1/2009 5:42:44 AM | but seriously.....robbie, your photos make you appear much older than 36 years. i agree with the need for recent, clear photos.
i thought your profile read as a joke. i would never believe it was written by a man with any desire to actually date a woman. it is harsh and judgemental. or perhaps you are reaching out to a specific type??
my vote....scrap pile | |
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| Warning! Highly dangerous profile, avoid!
Posted: 11/1/2009 5:49:52 AM | | You've completely missed the "Interests" section. You should fill that in if you are serious about wanting this Internet dating to work for you. | |
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| Warning! Highly dangerous profile, avoid!
Posted: 11/1/2009 8:16:44 AM | Hi Robbie_X…actually it has potential….you write well, but your profile is in need of some serious editing to work. It gets her amused, but probably not enthused.
A few suggestions…
1) The “bodice ripping” and ‘red hot gypsy wenches’ aren’t turn-ons for women. For guys, YES… but you say you’re looking to date a woman, right?
2) The ‘who is this guy and is he walking the streets unsupervised” works well.
3) The implants don’t….funny, but location location location. This isn’t it.
4) The “I’ve grown really fond of you in the last half minute” was a riot!
5) The “I’m dumping the gypsy wenches” is a turn off.
6) As is “however dumb your profile and laughable your photo”.
7) You’ve got the makings of something that could be stellar. Right now it’s more cellar than stellar.
8) Get those new photos, tank up on some Halloween sugar (balanced with some protein), and start editing.
9) Oh yeah…and maybe address the 36 and single….it’s a red flag for a lot of women. She wants to know you’ve had some LT relationships and are capable of being able to date for more than 2 seconds.
Hope that helps. Best to you. DenverSky5280 
p.s. -- the X in the name....cheesy....niX it. | |
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