| When a man...
Posted: 11/1/2009 12:12:15 PM | | So I was just curious, how important is body language? And what body language do you guys catch yourself doing when with a women that you are starting to get feelings for? And how about conversations about personal things (places you wanna travel, goals in life, what you look for in a relationship, random stuff), when you catch yourself opening up to a women..what does that mean, and how does it make you feel? Also, I know must women chatter away, but when you are actually listening and remembering things she says, why are/do you? And last one, if you feel a women has potential to be a "potential" how long do you wait before you have sex with her and why? | |
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| When a man...
Posted: 11/1/2009 12:39:29 PM | ''last one, if you feel a women has potential to be a "potential" how long do you wait before you have sex with her and why? ''
We dont wait. We do it, or at least try to do it, when we want. We dont play that game. We don't 'hold' sex to see how the relationship goes or to get something... But you are...
''I know must women chatter away, but when you are actually listening and remembering things she says, why are/do you? ''
If you have the problem of pretty much never getting your boyfriend to listen and remember what you said, its usually because you talk to much about things that he doesnt care about and that you shouldnt care about anyway. | |
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| When a man...
Posted: 11/1/2009 12:43:38 PM |
And what body language do you guys catch yourself doing when with a women that you are starting to get feelings for?
Body language is usually a sub-conscious act. If you're doing it on purpose, it's just "moves." I'm not sure what I do, exactly. I've never watched myself.
And how about conversations about personal things (places you wanna travel, goals in life, what you look for in a relationship, random stuff), when you catch yourself opening up to a women..what does that mean, and how does it make you feel?
This could just mean I feel comfortable talking to her about these things. It doesn't necessarily mean I'm into her. This seems to be something women get confused about alot. Opening up doesn't always mean the guy is planning a future together. It could just be that he likes talking.
Also, I know must women chatter away, but when you are actually listening and remembering things she says, why are/do you?
Listening to what she says isn't a sure sign I like a girl either. If someone tells a good story, I'll listen. If they drone on and on about themselves, I'll watch their mouth move and hope it ends soon.
And last one, if you feel a women has potential to be a "potential" how long do you wait before you have sex with her and why?
As soon as possible to make sure she's not in it for the free meals and activities. | |
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Posted: 11/1/2009 1:51:37 PM | It's easy to feel and catch that vibe when a woman likes a man. but for me i can have some awkward body language lol i can be hesitant and nervous if i like her a lot and if im not sure how she feels.... but if i know she likes me i'm a whole different person. my confidence is through the roof and my body language shows that.
It's easy picking it up. some people can feel and see everyone's body language and react without even realizing because it's our basic instinct.
Sex?... i always leave that decision to her. now or later it's no big deal for me. i can wait for it anytime. | |
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| When a man...
Posted: 11/1/2009 2:08:08 PM | You have to know what the guy's after, to read the body language. for example, if he's looking for a woman to control, then when he figures you're the type of woman to let him make all the decisions for you (ie, "be a man"), then his body language may be that he invades your physical space such as putting his arms around you, as if to contain you. But if he's looking for sex, it may be more hands-on, than arms-around.
So ,its not a one-size-fits-all....unless your personality keeps attracting the same type of guy  Look back upon your own experiences...how did those guys act?
Opening up to a woman? you have to listen to what he says, to know. Does he sound like he's opening up, or just sharing? Or merely bullshitting?
If she has potential....sex just comes. If she doesn't have potential to date, but potential for sex, then...sex just comes. Sex is like having a beer--it gives you a buzz. women make the mistake of thinking it means something. Sex is just a medium thru which you can share yourself. Like having a beer, you can have sex w/ a friend, a stranger, or get a buzz on your own.
Making love, now that's something different...and hopefully that difference is understood? | |
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| When a man...
Posted: 11/1/2009 2:25:10 PM | The last question was loaded, not all men function on the same level so you would get different answers for that one. There are some first dates where the man will actually initiate sex and it will actually lead to a relationship, stranger things have been known to happen and this is not an exception to the rule. This one is like shooting with your eyes closed.
Men open up to women when they feel that the person can be trusted enough with very personal info about them. They gauge conversations, purposefully create situations just to see how you will react. Depending on the reaction of a woman, how "cute" she is really has nothing to do with it. It is a plus, but even the "plain Janes" can best the Barbie in this department. Looks aren't everything. | |
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Posted: 11/1/2009 2:48:41 PM | Body language is very important as it will tell you things she is really thinking. Ex. wanting to hold his hand while you walk side by side will tell you she feels comfortable with you and just wants to touch you and vice versa of course!
What we look for while sharing personal things is to hear what it is she has to say about herself and if what it is she does say jives with us. What it will mean is the more we/she shares, the more we know a bond is/is not being made.
As we listen to her, there is nothing for us to do other than to hear what she is saying and if we like her and want to see her again, that gives us valuable information for us to know and use to do something special for her!
How long do we wait before having sex with her and how long? It all depends on the chemistry. If we get along really well and it simply feels right then, it won’t be too long.
Of course not ALL guys would follow this, some guys are more interested in letting you think what it is you want tom in order for them to have sex with you but when that is the case, it is up to you to see that is what is happening. | |
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Posted: 11/1/2009 3:49:21 PM | I'd guess, that unless the guy is a womanizer, few of us guys really pick up on all that body language, which is too bad, because it's so important and revealing. I just look for that first touch! Usually done, as if by accident or just to emphasise something said!
As far as sex. I wait til she goes crazy! Don't care for that pulling hens teeth with an unwilling girl! This way is MUCH more passionate and fun! | |
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Posted: 11/1/2009 4:34:54 PM |
when you catch yourself opening up to a women
Personally, I don't "catch" myself opening up. It all happens as the feelings progress.
what does that mean, and how does it make you feel?
It means that the feelings of trust have reached a certain level. It makes me feel closer to her.
Also, I know must women chatter away, but when you are actually listening and remembering things she says, why are/do you? Because she's asking me what I want for dinner and bringing me a beer! 
Seriously OP, for me, listening & remembering is just part of a good relationship. Within reason, it doesn't really matter what the subject is. That being said, I'm a lot older than you. I could definitely see some men your age (and mine too, come to think of it) pretending to listen/understand/remember, just so they could get into your pants.
And last one, if you feel a women has potential to be a "potential" how long do you wait before you have sex with her and why?
Again, I'm a lot older than you and I think that my stakes are a little higher. So, I tend to wait until I'm pretty sure this girl is going to be in my life for a good long while. With my last GF, we waited about 10 weeks or so (seeing each other twice a week on average) before actually being completely intimate.
OP, it sounds like a guy is getting close to you and you're starting to freak out a little bit. If that's the case, then just relax, let things develop naturally & comfortably, and don't ignore warning signs. | |
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Posted: 11/1/2009 5:21:32 PM | Ok.. I need to bring out the big guns here.. TOUGH TOUGH TOUGH love time
Your picture is a lot cuter than most. IF YOU are a lot cuter than most.. then you are attracting a lot of guys. This happens cause guys are visually based.. and PURSUE those that catch their visual attention first.. and then present a worthy enough challenge to continue to pursue.. follow so far?
now.. MEN are simple.. so are boys.. but I didnt check the AGE on your profile, so I presume you are dating REAL men who are 34 or older. If not.. you are getting alcohol-buying little BOY behavior.
Simple men pursue what they want. What they find ATTRACTIVE.. the person they are hoping to have SEX with.
All the blathering trying to MIRROR what you are saying.. trying to say the right thing to WIN YOUR PANTIES.. errrr.. HEART is just that.. BLATHER to most men
MOST men dont really pay attention to the blathering of most women. That's because they talk about GOSSIPY things.. like what this girl said at work or what they saw on Oprah.. or on ET or some other claptrap.
There is a saying.. Do you know why women have boobs? To give a man something to look at while they are blathering away.
You are way way way complicating this too much. A guy is gonna stick around as LONG as he thinks he'll be getting sex sooner than later. Do a test if you dont believe me.. NEXT guy that contacts you for dating.. go out with him.. tell him right up front there will be NO sex until YOU are ready.. NO touching.. NO kissing.. NADA.. Then start spilling your entire life story.. a little at a time.. give him the details about when you broke a nail opening a jar of pickles.. how your girlfriend's boyfriend's sister's cousin just met a bunch of gangbangers who had fascinating tattoos and how they were wondering if these gangbangers can stop bangin to be good daddies..
THEN watch his body language and facial expression.
You'll see. | |
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Posted: 11/1/2009 5:38:38 PM | Body language is HUGE. Body language, tone, attitude... communicates far more than words, and TRUMPS what words have to say. In the early dating phases, it pretty much means everything. It reveals if they're interested or not, and to what extent. Not an exact science, but a revealing one.
For guys & girls, the body language of interest : Lots of eye contact. Smiling a lot, kino (touching arms, hands, shoulders, etc), laughing at anything even possibly humorous... stuff like that.
Conversations: Not necessarily what they want to do in life. First dates are like that all around, regardless of interest. But yes, opening up about their feelings that sells well for themselves (and not a shoulder to cry on or to be 'a friend') will indicate he does like you... and compliments about YOU thrown in.
Listening: If he digs you, he will listen, but if he's a talker himself, he may not as much... but when you are talking and he remembers what you say, yes -- that's a requirement for him being REALLY into you.
Sex: If he really digs you, he won't awkwardly push for sex at all. Oh, he'll have it with you at any time or place, sure... but if he has a brain in his head, he's not expecting it to happen instantly. If he really digs you, his main interest is to get you REALLY interested in him. Obviously sex is a path to this too... so if he really digs you, he'll be fine not having sex with you for a little while. But with that said, if there's no "progression" and the 3rd date is the same as the 1st with a little goodnight kiss and thats it, that's an indicator to him that you're not interested and out for attention, and if so, his interest will drop out of frustration if he has other potential options. | |
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| When a man...
Posted: 11/1/2009 5:47:49 PM | I am in sales... I better to remember things they say and pay attention to some things e.g. I know your dog had puppies recently (because she said it) I better ask about puppies.
Good body language is awesome. Topics about travel are neutural and safe. I am German people ask me about Europe all the time (general stuff). Opening up. I usually very opened with people whom I know (dspiate gender).
Easrly sex or late sex has nothing to do with seeing a potentail and lose perspectives of a potential.
My wife gave me stuff on the second date. She is cute (pics are posted) and I wanted her right away but waited until the second... | |
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Posted: 11/1/2009 5:53:06 PM | | I dont use body language or read it either. when she offers to do my laundry then I take it she is serious. other then that its all banter | |
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Posted: 11/1/2009 6:39:22 PM | Ahem. You seem like a young woman who is tired of all the clueless young guys your own age. Well, I'm proud and happy to announce that there are several older and wiser men hanging around here (not myself included, of course - I'm perfectly situated), that will wipe all your blues away and give you exactly what you're looking for. It's just a matter of age. Ya know?!!! Wuddya think? Yuck? Or goodie goodie?
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Posted: 11/1/2009 6:54:08 PM | Body language for me or the woman? Body language for me when I like a woman is eye contact and smiling I guess. The past women I had feelings for I talk more than normal and confide in them and they confide back in me. I won't go into detail but there was one instance where we were like the only ones in the restaurant. i felt like I was walking on air with her that day. I hung on to every word she said.
The "potential" thing I don't know, if things are perfectly aligned i don't think it has to be a timetable. | |
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Posted: 11/1/2009 7:00:15 PM | op,
i don't think men & women are really all that different...other than maybe the guys will have sex sooner. if he's into you, he'll hang around...and i know you want to know what he's thinking...and, hence, your question....but really, only time will tell if he sticks around. watch for consistency and give it time. if you have yet to go out, give him just enough encouragement to ask you out...that's all most guys need.... | |
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Posted: 11/1/2009 7:54:38 PM | So I was just curious, how important is body language? So I was just curious, how important is body language? And what body language do you guys catch yourself doing when with a women that you are starting to get feelings for?
Mademoiselle, body language is extremely hard to fake. Look up 'Micro-Expressions'. When women like a guy they tend to molest him or find an excuse to touch him. On the other hand, guys who are really into you tend to be a little conservative with touchy-feely-ness. Usually because we don't want to screw things up by bringing our weeny in the equation. But once it gets going, we can't keep our hands out of the cookie jar.
And how about conversations about personal things (places you wanna travel, goals in life, what you look for in a relationship, random stuff), when you catch yourself opening up to a women..what does that mean, and how does it make you feel
The question is how should I feel when she blackmails me with that info? I discuss my mommy issues thinking that they won't be used against me but that's never the case! Alright truthfully, its kind of like being the 'first man to the moon'.
Also, I know must women chatter away, but when you are actually listening and remembering things she says, why are/do you?
My dad told me if I sit through the 'listening' part with women and remember it, I'll get laid by the end of it. That's all I need to know.
And last one, if you feel a women has potential to be a "potential" how long do you wait before you have sex with her and why?
"Short term pain, long term gain.", that's how I think when I see 'long-term potential'. So sex becomes less important in the short-term. | |
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Posted: 11/1/2009 11:08:45 PM | Uness people are specifically trained, they don't use their body language conciously.
There could be one or two "moves" that people typically interpet like a sign of interest, but it's like singling out a word or two out of the whole language and thinking you got it.
When he talks about his future listen carefully, and try not to be biased. He means it. It's not going to change. If it doesn't fit you, find another man.
He remembers what he finds interesting or important. The rest goes in the dumpster, especially if you talk a lot.
Most men would want to have sex right away as soon as they find you attractive. But whether or not they will try to do it depends on many things. | |
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Posted: 11/2/2009 3:32:34 AM |
So I was just curious, how important is body language?
Depends on the person. For me = very important. I like touching / cuddling.
And what body language do you guys catch yourself doing when with a women that you are starting to get feelings for?
See above.
how about conversations about personal things
If I'm interested, I talk about them. If I'm not, it doesn't progress to this.
when you catch yourself opening up to a women..what does that mean
I don't “catch myself” doing this. It's a conscious decision. If I'm interested, I open up – if not, I don't. If I do, it just means I'm sharing who I am, and letting her decide if I'm a good match.
how does it make you feel?
Vulnerable.
when you are actually listening and remembering things she says, why are/do you?
I care about her, or I'm trying to get laid. Often, it's both.
And last one, if you feel a women has potential to be a "potential" how long do you wait before you have sex with her and why?
This isn't a function of time, it's a function of comfort / chemistry. When we're comfortable moving to that stage, we will. | |
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| When a man...
Posted: 11/2/2009 11:25:19 AM | | You don't work for Gallup, by any chance? | |
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