| Buying his ex-girlfriend a car?
Posted: 11/1/2009 4:50:18 PM | I recently met a guy on POF and we got off to a really great start. I am 38 and he is 44. Five months ago he ended a twelve year relationship with his girlfriend because she cheated on him and now has a new boyfriend. This guy tells me he definitely wants a very serious relationship, so my problem? He's buying his ex-girlfriend a car. It's not a cheap car either, he pays about 400.00 a month for her car while he is living at home with his mom. I was shocked when he first told me, but decided to let it slide and see what was up. A few days later I heard him talking to her on the phone at my house and it had something to do with her brakes being okay. When I told him this whole thing doesn't sound quite right, his reaction was to blow me off for a week. Now I'm seeing him again, and feel conflicted thinking "am I just walking around with stupid stamped on my forehead?" I'm afraid I'm too close to the situation to tell. Thank you,
Ana | |
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| Buying his ex-girlfriend a car?
Posted: 11/1/2009 4:54:29 PM | a 44 year old man who lives with his mom and buys his girlfriend a car.
Why did you let it slide?
He blew you off for a week and you came back for more?
Things may have gotten off to a really great start but that's changed now. | |
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| Buying his ex-girlfriend a car?
Posted: 11/1/2009 5:00:03 PM | | Wow...yeah...hate to tell you...It's stamped on your head....take a minute...and go back and read what you wrote....then make your decision.... | |
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| Buying his ex-girlfriend a car?
Posted: 11/1/2009 5:02:57 PM | It could have something to do with a common law spouse and alimony after 12 years, but then he should have explained.
More likely she plays him and he doesn't mind. Obviously she screwed around on him, so she wants what's best for her. Not surprised she accepted. Perhaps he even got one last nookie for it... Either way, leave. | |
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| Buying his ex-girlfriend a car?
Posted: 11/1/2009 5:05:05 PM | | I'm sorry but I don't think you're thinking this thing through. What is wrong with this picture? Wow, you need to re-think this relationship and run (don't walk) away right now. The guy is living with his mother...he's 44...and he's paying $400 car payment for his ex-girlfriend that currently has a boyfriend. Listen honey, this guy is a "loser"...don't be one too...run!!!!!!!!! | |
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| Buying his ex-girlfriend a car?
Posted: 11/1/2009 5:10:05 PM | Come closer.. closer... closer..
SMACK!!!
Yes-I can see the word "Stupid" very clearly written on your forehead. Go wash it off and have a beer.   | |
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| Buying his ex-girlfriend a car?
Posted: 11/1/2009 5:10:49 PM | You have got to be kidding.....right?
Clear your head girl and take a long hard look at the facts.....
Explain to me why you are still interested? I don't get it! | |
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| Buying his ex-girlfriend a car?
Posted: 11/1/2009 5:14:29 PM | Hmmmmmmm. He can't pay his own rent yet can pay an ex gf's car payment?????
.............Here's Your Sign! | |
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| Buying his ex-girlfriend a car?
Posted: 11/1/2009 5:26:02 PM | Whats wrong with this picture
1) He buy his girlfriend a car
2) He's paying $400 a month for it for her
3) She has a boyfriend
4) He got the brakes fixed on her car
5) He called from your palce to talk to her
6) He blows you off for a week
7) He lives at home
8) You got STUPID on your forehead and don't see it
Now need I say any more | |
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| Buying his ex-girlfriend a car?
Posted: 11/1/2009 5:56:34 PM | | Honey, right now "stupid" is a stamp on your forehead. If you stick around, it's gonna be a tattoo. | |
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| Buying his ex-girlfriend a car?
Posted: 11/1/2009 6:05:17 PM | But no shet though.....
Yet another person crossing the line and pointing their finger at the other person for not being the person they want them to be. It's none of your business what he does with his money. The real problem is he doesn't value your opinion as much as you do when it comes to his life.
The thing about him living with his mother really has nothing to do with this. You knew that before this problem with you sticking your nose in his business ever came to light! And you were obviously fine with it. So spare me the bullshet! | |
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| Buying his ex-girlfriend a car?
Posted: 11/1/2009 6:08:00 PM | Obviously their relationship has not ended. If it had he'd not be associating with her, buying her cars, and paying $400 a month for her car.
He's putting her before you.
He's 44 years old, living with mommy, and he throws mantrums!  Sounds like a real winner to me.
He's clearly not ready for a real relationship. He's still involved with her.
I'd have dumped him a long time ago. | |
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| Buying his ex-girlfriend a car?
Posted: 11/1/2009 6:15:26 PM | This guy is far more clever than what we give him credit for. I smell a rat.....[puts on Hercule Poirot hat]
Boyfriend buys ex a car...a late model one. Technically a safe car.
Moves in with mum, for what can be described as the perfect alibi.
Something happens with the car....ooops....car has brake problems. Sh1t...plan A got foiled. I better play the 'caring' and 'worried' ex-boyfriend. I better offer to fix it (and hide incriminating stuff).
Current girlfriend brings up the situation as this whole thing doesn't sound quite right.
Reaction: blow her off for a week [and plan B...meet ex somewhere coastal with a huge cliff and the resounding crash of the waves with a bright orange sunset as backdrop, and sunflowers everywhere...ohh and the butterflies.]
Taadaaa! I smell crispy bacon being cooked here.... | |
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| Buying his ex-girlfriend a car?
Posted: 11/1/2009 6:15:45 PM | | I'd say this thread is closed.....answer has been strewn across for the last page or so.I suppose you have your answer..... | |
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| Buying his ex-girlfriend a car?
Posted: 11/1/2009 6:19:17 PM | | Do they have any children together or anything like that? Is the car in his name, meaning he took out the loan? Perhaps he has to pay for it. | |
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| Buying his ex-girlfriend a car?
Posted: 11/1/2009 6:20:00 PM | Well, I expect you have only started "dating" this guy, as you are on here as single and looking for dating. So, RUN, don't walk! Accept this as a lesson and learn to listen to your gut before you go down this road again.
Oh - interesting thought, was he by chance, supported by the ex for 12 years? Maybe the car is the repayment of food & rent over the last 12 years? | |
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| Buying his ex-girlfriend a car?
Posted: 11/1/2009 6:43:31 PM | Op,id be wondering why he's not putting the money toward rent (for himself) and,why her NEW boyfriend isnt buying her a car?
Come to think of it........why isnt she buying the car HERSELF........????
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| Buying his ex-girlfriend a car?
Posted: 11/1/2009 6:44:05 PM | the thing about living with his mother....
she knew this (rockman) but perhaps she assumed he was doing it for financial reasons, maybe get ahead, save some money, move out
so that made it okay in her mind, a man with a plan
but
to then find out that he is spending money on an ex girlfriend puts his living arrangement in another light.
we often accept certain things in a certain light, but when the light changes and we see other things that contradict what we perceived, we often see what is really is, therefore, we are not as accepting because the real deal is not acceptable to us.
that is part of the getting to know you, evaluate you, in relation to my wanting to have a relationship with you.
no foul on her part
the rest of it, well when his business turns out to be monkey business, then we do what we have to do
kaylee | |
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| Buying his ex-girlfriend a car?
Posted: 11/1/2009 6:51:46 PM | | Sounds like you may not have all the facts. Like someone said, courts might have ruled common law marrage and awarded such car payments. Regardles if hes blowing you off with this question he doesnt seem like someone who can communicate well, and isnt that ultimately what keeps a relationship on track? | |
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| Buying his ex-girlfriend a car?
Posted: 11/1/2009 6:55:18 PM | oh and if he wanted a relationship and there were some extenuating circumstance, he could have offered them up. but by blowing her off, which is his right to not offer up any explanations, then she can only accept that he is not willing to go there.
and make her choices
kaylee | |
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