| Cute Doesn't Cut It ...
Posted: 11/1/2009 4:59:38 PM | In reading a news article sharing dating tips from Michelle Obama, the First Lady recommends that you look past appearance if you want/expect a relationship to last. Guess she should know - she's been married almost 20 years herself!
Anyways, this got me thinking ... what do you look for in a long-term relationship? Trust? Compatibility? Sense of Humour? Personal Happiness? Financial Success? Ambitions? Something else entirely? | |
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| Cute Doesn't Cut It ...
Posted: 11/1/2009 5:03:03 PM | maybe do a search , this has been done to death on here
and, i doubt id be looking to a presidents wife for dating advice. he obviously looked past her appearance to pick her and vice versa | |
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| Cute Doesn't Cut It ...
Posted: 11/1/2009 5:34:23 PM | | Fidelity, honesty, integrity, character, sense of humor..a good companion and being "cute" to me.... is important | |
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| Cute Doesn't Cut It ...
Posted: 11/1/2009 6:41:55 PM | I haven't been married 20 years, but have been with the same person for almost 3 years now.
You know what? In almost every profile I've read, people want someone to complement them...and up till now, I've struggled to find the right word to describe the chemistry between my man and I, but I think he and I complement each other.
All the OP suggested: trust, compatibility, sense of humour, personal happiness and financial success do apply in my case, but they all fell into place once he and I realised that we think and react alike on most things, plus he's a (one) woman's man who knows what women want!
Lucky me  | |
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| Cute Doesn't Cut It ...
Posted: 11/1/2009 8:48:51 PM |
what do you look for in a long-term relationship?
LOL, dude, nobody on this site even knows WTF that is. That's like asking a fat guy how it feels to have a size 32 waist. Oh, he dreams about it..but it ain't happening. | |
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| Cute Doesn't Cut It ...
Posted: 11/1/2009 9:14:52 PM |
That's like asking a fat guy how it feels to have a size 32 waist. Oh, he dreams about it..but it ain't happening.
Well, chances are at some point in the past the guy did have a 32 waist as I doubt anyone is born with a waist of that size. Just sayin'.  | |
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| Cute Doesn't Cut It ...
Posted: 11/1/2009 10:22:31 PM | LOL, dude, nobody on this site even knows WTF that is. That's like asking a fat guy how it feels to have a size 32 waist. Oh, he dreams about it..but it ain't happening.
Wrong...was married for 17 years, and trust me that was long term....LOL.  | |
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| Cute Doesn't Cut It ...
Posted: 11/2/2009 5:58:07 AM | I think that before people start wondering what they want, they need to re-evaluate what they are willing to put into the relationship to make it long term.
I cannot speak for many on here as I am still happily married after being together for near 20 years and married formally for more than half of those. But I can tell you that for my age group, that is not too common. More than half who have been married at some point in my age group are through with their first marriages.
People don't realize the level of dedication, commitment, forgiveness, understanding and sharing that a marriage means. They've got this idea (one or both parties) that they can have their own needs or wants met and not really have to be responsible to anyone else about it. To not be expected to return the attention that they are given. To be able to take others for granted as if the love, attention, caring and dedication to them are due to them for being there, but not able or willint or whatever the reason they don't return it at least as intensely as they recieve it.
This "accept me as I am" crap destroys a lot of relationships. You can retain who you are but should understand that the ideal person for you is someone who returns all that you offer and makes you want to be a better person to your partner. Your partner should feel the same way. Pettiness, this "treat me like a princess" crap, the "me me me" ideals that men and women are guilty of... these destroy the relationship no matter how ideal your partners may be. Society needs to be re-educated on what a successful marriage means, what level of commitment it takes, but also what you get in return and why the dedication you give is rewarded so much by someone able to return that to you plus more. It makes giving to a relationship a pleasure because you know that you are making your partner happy and you know your partner is doing exactly that right back at you to make you happy. | |
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| Cute Doesn't Cut It ...
Posted: 11/2/2009 4:40:53 PM | Interesting Guy Fact
In a recent study, researchers found that women use both sides of their brain to perceive beauty, while men use only their right side....As a result, women pay attention to small details (like chipped nail), but men view the overall effect ("she's hot").....So don't stress over tiny flaws he's not picking up on.
The only detail he cares about is if you're single.  | |
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| Cute Doesn't Cut It ...
Posted: 11/2/2009 4:47:21 PM | | Explains a lot, as I'm left handed, and therefore use the opposite side of my brain normally... | |
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| Cute Doesn't Cut It ...
Posted: 11/2/2009 8:10:11 PM |
The only detail he cares about is if you're single.
Um, LOL, that's probably is about important as the "chipped nail". | |
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| Cute Doesn't Cut It ...
Posted: 11/7/2009 3:10:25 AM |
They've got this idea (one or both parties) that they can have their own needs or wants met and not really have to be responsible to anyone else about it. To not be expected to return the attention that they are given. To be able to take others for granted as if the love, attention, caring and dedication to them are due to them for being there, but not able or willint or whatever the reason they don't return it at least as intensely as they recieve it.
This "accept me as I am" crap destroys a lot of relationships. You can retain who you are but should understand that the ideal person for you is someone who returns all that you offer and makes you want to be a better person to your partner. Your partner should feel the same way. Pettiness, this "treat me like a princess" crap, the "me me me" ideals that men and women are guilty of... these destroy the relationship no matter how ideal your partners may be.
So true EasyGuy! One sided relationships don't make it very far. Resentment will build and destroy the relationship if one is always compromising for another. | |
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