| Jesus is stealing my girlfriends!
Posted: 11/1/2009 7:37:44 PM | I hate to complain (but I’m going to) but this has happened twice.
I’ve dated two women (not at the same time) over the last year. Both of them had strong religious beliefs. Our personalities clicked and we had a lot in common; however once the sex started they began to feeling guilty. Not just “did I sleep with you too soon” guilty, but “I’ve sinned against God guilty.” Then they broke it off because they needed to seek the Lord! WTF? I liked these women! I would have been glad to keep the relationship(s) going but I don't understand this feeling of "sin" they had.
I don’t understand this mind set. I can understand being religious and saving oneself for marriage if one is young but once one is in one’s 30+’s with divorce(s) and kid(s) why pull this card?
Kudos to you J.C., I think you might be doin’ better than some of us. >:P
Anyone else encountered this? If so, what do you do? I really liked these women but .......???? I have no idea how to deal this type of thinking. | |
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| Jesus is stealing my girlfriends!
Posted: 11/1/2009 7:40:50 PM | | hmmm...op....could just be excuses...admittedly, very original! if they're serious, however, then let's hope to god you're religious! | |
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| Jesus is stealing my girlfriends!
Posted: 11/1/2009 7:45:17 PM | Yep...that was her excuse to cut and run....i really wouldnt mention the whole god and sinning thing to anyone else...ever again...it's plain to see...she wasnt diggin something... Sorry Guy... | |
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| Jesus is stealing my girlfriends!
Posted: 11/1/2009 7:47:34 PM | There are some women (and men) that totally believe that they have committed a sin if they have sex outside of marriage. The strange part is they continue to do it, and then beat themselves up about it afterwards. I have a friend who gets herself into a situation, then beats herself up about it, and then tells me next time, she will have a ring on her finger before it happens again... It seems pretty messed up to me...
I think that is why some people tend to avoid dating women/men who mention a strong attachment to religion. | |
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| Jesus is stealing my girlfriends!
Posted: 11/1/2009 7:49:09 PM | | You list yourself as "Non-Religious"-- why not stick to your own kind? You'll never understand if you're Non-Religious | |
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| Jesus is stealing my girlfriends!
Posted: 11/1/2009 7:51:31 PM | op
don't date women that have that religious belief. i don't think it is an excuse, i think many have been raised with that belief and do have guilt from it.
kaylee | |
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| Jesus is stealing my girlfriends!
Posted: 11/1/2009 7:59:06 PM | Anyone else encountered this?
Well, not that exactly. But jesus stole my cookies once.
If so, what do you do?
I cried. Then I went to the store and bought some more:).
I have no idea how to deal this type of thinking.
Calling it thinking is a stretch...anyway, you don't deal with it; it's best to let people deal with their own delusions.
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| Jesus is stealing my girlfriends!
Posted: 11/1/2009 8:56:52 PM | | Some people take Christian-Judea biblical teachings very seriously. The story of the old testiment city of sodom and gamora, which was burned to the ground in its entirity due to fornication and sodomy that was being widespread practiced in society, all being seen as sins as the reason for its destruction. It would appear if so, America should be going up in flames shortly. | |
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| Jesus is stealing my girlfriends!
Posted: 11/1/2009 8:57:59 PM | | Maybe spend a little bit more time exploring the differences between you before having sex. If there's a deal breaker it's better to find out before sleeping together so no one's feelings are too hurt. | |
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| Jesus is stealing my girlfriends!
Posted: 11/1/2009 9:16:53 PM |
I have no idea how to deal this type of thinking.
Simple...don't! When you have such diametrically opposed points of view on such fundamental questions as life, the universe and everything, you have zero chance of making it work. Screen out those seriously religious types before dating them, and sleeping with them of course. | |
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| Jesus is stealing my girlfriends!
Posted: 11/1/2009 9:18:41 PM | Jesus is a rather common name in South America. So me and my brother used to bike with Jesus. So when our mother would ask if we would like to go to her church with her. My brother, a ten times more abrasive person than me would say. "Mom, have you talked to Jesus, today, Have you mom?" My mom would grin because she knew his humor but being rather conservative would not say a word. Then he would say "I've spoken to Jesus today mom. And he is indeed doing good, But Jesus, Mom is a little out of shape and wants now to ride his bike more. And we want to ride our bikes with Jesus."
The thing is when he first said this to my mom, he was kind of angry for her pushing, but it became a running joke that eventually my own mom would laugh about. And yes, I biked with Jesus as well, but he was too slow. | |
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| Jesus is stealing my girlfriends!
Posted: 11/1/2009 9:37:18 PM |
Hell he can turn water to Wine .. I bet he makes one helluva java!
Lol!
Dude, you're competing with Jesus here. The guy is three beings in one. He made blind people see. He cured the sick! Brought people back from the dead. Heck! He brought himself back from the dead! Was able to turn five loaves and two fish into thousands of loaves and fish! He offers eternal salvation, unconditional love, and forgiveness!
I have yet to meet a guy who can compete with Jesus.
You have to understand that there are people in this world who take religion very serious and can feel very guilty if they sin. | |
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| Jesus is stealing my girlfriends!
Posted: 11/1/2009 9:37:42 PM | | It sounds like to me this is a situation where these womens childhood messages are coming back to them when they have sex. These women really like you and have sex with you but the problem is that when they were growing up, there parents probably told them that sex is disgusting and any woman that has sex outisde of marriage is going to hell and men are icky. I would say that sex outside of marriage probably makes them feel like they are the women that there parents used to degrade and feel really ashamed. I would say that even if it isn't necessarily about religion itself, it certainly would have its origins in childhood. I should know because girls in my community used to get these messages all the time and it shows with there attitudes to this day, even if they aren't religious. | |
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| Jesus is stealing my girlfriends!
Posted: 11/1/2009 10:04:06 PM |
you're "non-religious" but date to "religious" women ? and then you complain when they freak out ?
That's a good point that I've not paid much attention to when perusing profiles; however, maybe there there should be a sub-category to religion. It could go like this....
I'm religious but I fornicate...
1) Often
2) Some of the time
3) Trying to quit
4) Never | |
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| Jesus is stealing my girlfriends!
Posted: 11/1/2009 10:17:51 PM | | For me it hasn't even gotten to the point of having sex before religion becomes an issue. Idaho is a very religious state and while it does seem a little better since moving to Boise (our biggest city - if you can call it that) religion still is an issue a lot. It seems that all of the men I meet are mormon or evangelical. I am not bashing these religions, but my own beliefs are extremely liberal and its not a good match. The rest of the men are military and I dont believe in war. Most of these guys say they can accept a woman having different beliefs, but they all seem to be trying to convert me after just talking a couple of times. It's even worse if they find out that I am what the mormons call "inactive" - in other words I was an active church member at one time. I do think that a lot of people (even divorced and in their 30s) think sex before marriage is wrong though. I think the real question is how to meet people with more compatible beliefs. Anybody have an answer to that? | |
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| Jesus is stealing my girlfriends!
Posted: 11/1/2009 10:22:59 PM | You're in the Bible belt, stay away from Baptists and people that check Christian other as they tend to be more fundamentalist in their thinking, literal Bible interpretation, and more of the mindset of rules and sin than people that are non-religious or some other Christian affiliation.
I'm with the person who said you should explore your similarities and differences more before you get involved with someone. Maybe these chicks are serial in this because part of them wants sex and the other part says it is a no, no so they date someone, get some nookie, then move on. | |
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