| can YOU guess his problem???help
Posted: 11/3/2009 3:02:38 PM | I dated a guy who is 3 months out of a 7 yr relationship.I knew his girlfriend (she looked like me) and he even pusued me when with his girlfriend.he liked me for years. and he cheated on her,she left.he was totally devastated drinking for months.Not cleaning his place.Thing is I am also 3 months out of a 7 yr relationship, also but see my ex still once a week.Now I have been dating my new guy and sparks have flew in bed also. He has tidied his home litterd with beer cans and seems happier again,lol we have kissed and cuddled,he was texting and calling me all the time,but sometimes our conversation was still awkward.last night I was with him and my ex called me,he seen my phone lighting up,I denied it.he seemed annoyed,and then brought out his phone and text another girl,said it is ok to see other people.he also kept checking out the window of his home, and seemed like a car went past and stopped,but he was begging me to stay the night, even brought for me food.I said no and went home. he said so you are leaving me after all I done for you then laughed like he was joking!!!Again as I got up to leave my phone beeped a message from my ex. then my new guy started texting me about how sexy I was till 2am, how he wished i had stayed,how he wants me to call down anytime i want to keep him company. he has done this before after ignoring me all night I would get a drunken voicemail and call 1am.I think he was probably drinking last night also.but today he was distant only replying to my texts bluntly, and never even text me once this eveing..I am worried as I like him and am wanting to be pursued by him again. I can't understand the change in him help??? | |
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| can YOU guess his problem???help
Posted: 11/3/2009 3:11:41 PM | | Boy oh boy! Where do u want help hun? Ur choices of bad/messed up men, ur lack of good judgement? He's not going to stop drinking just cause u say he cleaned up all the cans. U messed up by denying ur phone text, so that makes u untrustworthy. He is a jealous/paranoid, looking out windows. Bad thing about lots of ladies and I'm placing u in that, is once the bedroom is satisfying emotions rule judgements. Staying over at his place to stop him from drinking is a irrational based thinking mode. So if u think that way, MOVE IN WITH HIM NOW AND SAVE HIM FROM THE BEER! Wake up! | |
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| can YOU guess his problem???help
Posted: 11/3/2009 3:11:48 PM | Hun your have a GRADUATE degree and 29...... I though it was a post from a 20 y.o.
Anyways, he was heart, he made mistakes, he has issues related to that. Because of his issues he can't comprehense why you still talk to you ex.
He goes on a defence, assumes negative, runs on insecurity that he also need to see other people. In our house there is a rule no calls, texts after 11 p.m. (everyone knows it) unless it is an emergency. I do not know what is your bed time but I would guess before 2 a.m. and from the clear message that t is a bed time for YOU. Period. The phone goes off. | |
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| can YOU guess his problem???help
Posted: 11/3/2009 3:31:11 PM | Now, who do you want - your ex or your new guy? It seems like having them both presents some difficulties... Therefore... Let's assume you like the new guy better. In which case...
It may sound scary, but here is a suggestion:
- tell your ex that you are seeing someone else. Even though you have friendly feelings for your ex, you no longer can talk to him as often as you used to. Negotiate a new schedule. (Once a year is the best IMO.)
- tell your new guy the truth. That you used to talk to your ex once a week, but now you explained the situation to your ex and asked him not to call as often.
Seriously, grow a pair of boobs, work up the courage to say it how it is. | |
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| can YOU guess his problem???help
Posted: 11/3/2009 4:05:59 PM | | Can you guess his problem...hmmmmm He's ****ed in the head. What you should do is stay away from him sounds like he's not ready to be in a relationship. By the sounds of it your not either if you think this is normal. You just came out of a 7 year relationship. Go out and date some sane people and have some fun. | |
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| can YOU guess his problem???help
Posted: 11/3/2009 4:18:30 PM | Ok...hang on now...your the one who just wrote about your ex...a few nights ago pissin and moaning... and you have already had sex with another guy....when you were so hartbroken over the ex.....well..he got you in the sack already...why should he call again....he's probably moved on to the.... NEXT~~~~ | |
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| can YOU guess his problem???help
Posted: 11/3/2009 4:58:06 PM | why even worry about this guy and his drama? find another drunken unavailable scumbag. they're a dime a dozen, lined up at the bar in every sh|thole tavern in your town.
or just bang your 'ex' a little more often, and you won't even be thinking about beer can boy. | |
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| can YOU guess his problem???help
Posted: 11/3/2009 6:04:18 PM | He sobered up.
You're his drunk sweetie.
(as in sweetie while drunk)
For future reference:
Never take calls from ex's while seeing someone new.
Especially if they are not really an ex, but an almost ex. | |
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| can YOU guess his problem???help
Posted: 11/3/2009 6:34:02 PM |
can YOU guess his problem???help ... help???
Who cares about HIS problem, when yours are so gigantic?
Your post is a clear reminder of why a life of drugs and alcohol leads to the demise of a person's judgment capacity.
Here's what this sounds like to me:
"Um, like, I really like this guy, and um, we had sex and you know like, he really gave it to me good you know, and he broke up with his ex and I broke up with my ex, and like I, you know, really don't know what's going on. I mean like, the sex was great right, so why isn't everything wonderful? And plus, you know, he drinks and is messy, but I screwed some of the beer cans into the trashcan, yes I sure did. And I like those kinda guys like that anyway, tee hee, so, um, what should I do?"
If you were my sister, here's what I would tell you: Close your legs for a year. Or two. Get off the drugs and juice, get some genuine counseling (alcohol/drug abuse, sexual addiction, Lord only knows what else), and make a solid new choice about who you choose to be as a WOMAN.
In truth, your challenges are so widespread and encompassing you need God's help and should connect with a good church with solid members who have experience helping take girls the street. That's not a popular idea around here, but it's what you need, plainly -- a spiritual awakening. | |
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| can YOU guess his problem???help
Posted: 11/3/2009 7:20:57 PM | From your initial post only
3 months out of a 7 yr thing.. and you went on a 2nd date?
He cheats on his chosen women.. and drinks himself to oblivion.. Wow.. what a catch
You see your ex once a week.. for what.. FWB sex?
Yeah.. sparks flew ALSO.. so now you have TWO Fbuddys to fill your holes
Not sure with the pronoun "HE" which peni has the beercans and is happier.. your 7 year Fbuddy.. or your NEW fbuddy
He is having sex with you with the window curtains open to see if his NEXT is there and he needs to shoo you out the backdoor. cool.. I need to take lessons from this guy
Trollop?? What's the confusion.. you have TWO peni to service your ADD-needy body.
Here's what I recommend.. Call them both Honey.. then you wont get their names confused.. set a regular schedule for each guy.. so you wont make a mistake and have them BOTH show up with fresh condoms on the same night..
OR..
Tell them you want them to come over for an MFM 3-sum.. Yeah.. that will work
Oh.. to answer the original question.. HE doesnt have the problem.. Neither of the guys have a problem.. Only the remaining person in this triangle has a problem
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| can YOU guess his problem???help
Posted: 11/3/2009 8:55:22 PM | You sure know how to pick 'em.
Did you pay attention to the last time I answered a question from you? At all? | |
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| can YOU guess his problem???help
Posted: 11/3/2009 9:17:11 PM | | Ah yes the joys of ireland drugs and booze gone wild. I think you should ask him to marry you. and have a big irish wedding, booze drugs and orgies. The problem with ireland? it is full of irish people. | |
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| can YOU guess his problem???help
Posted: 11/3/2009 10:26:04 PM | His problem is that he is a no good, cheating, untidy, boozing, skirt chasing, loser. That being said, he has the potential for joining several 12 step programs.  | |
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| can YOU guess his problem???help
Posted: 11/4/2009 12:36:34 AM | OP, I need a stiff drink after reading your post.
I am sitting here trying to figure out what you were, and are thinking.......I give up. If it isnt painfully obvious to you what the problem is, then I somehow doubt any amount of explanation or advice will help | |
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| can YOU guess his problem???help
Posted: 11/4/2009 12:42:50 AM | Were you high when you wrote this?
You're a trainwreck. Forget advice about this guy. You need advice on life. Get help. | |
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| can YOU guess his problem???help
Posted: 11/4/2009 12:50:14 AM |
Um, like, I really like this guy, and um, we had sex and you know like, he really gave it to me good you know, and he broke up with his ex and I broke up with my ex, and like I, you know, really don't know what's going on. I mean like, the sex was great right, so why isn't everything wonderful? And plus, you know, he drinks and is messy, but I screwed some of the beer cans into the trashcan, yes I sure did. And I like those kinda guys like that anyway, tee hee, so, um, what should I do
That about sums it all up really..... | |
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| can YOU guess his problem???help
Posted: 11/4/2009 3:59:20 AM | My dear, is your ego hurt any? Quit playing with the man's emotions and make a decision.
The man doesn't have the problem, it is you. Clarify how much of your self worth needs validation enough to let a man be. He deserves better.
On the other hand......
Dating a man who has a drinking problem, cheats, and is a slob is a sign of low self esteem and if you do need a man like that for validation, that is sooooooo tragic.
But are you any better for dating a man who's gf you knew? Kinda makes it look like you two were in cahoots with each other as you were both in 7 year relationships and are "separated" for 3.
Just saying..... | |
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| can YOU guess his problem???help
Posted: 11/4/2009 7:28:57 AM | What the hell is with you people that think going from relationship to relationship is a good thing? Supposedly you have a degree in psychology. Again, one would think you'd know better. You are both out of a 7 yr relationship. Take some time OFF and grow the hell up! Neither of these guys would be worth mytime but if you like being an available twat, that's up to you. I'd dump both their asses and never look back.
HR  | |
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| can YOU guess his problem???help
Posted: 11/4/2009 7:29:15 AM | | You're both 3 months out of 7 year relationships. Sounds like a mathematical equation to me, a relationship made in heaven. So much in common. You're each other's "rebound". And you're still taking calls from your "ex". Too much drama, why don't you get away for awhile, give yourself time to get your head together before jumping into the next dysfunctional relationship. | |
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