| Please review my profile - feedback wanted!
Posted: 11/4/2009 4:32:49 AM | Hey all!
I happened to come to pof and create a profile for dating and make a few online friends. I need your help with making my profile better. If you were a lady would you respond - why? Please just let me have it - with all the honest feedback - the only way to become great is to listen to all sides. Thanks for the super advice!
Have a Great Day!
Joe :-) | |
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| Please review my profile - feedback wanted!
Posted: 11/4/2009 6:17:44 AM | Hi Joe -
I read the testimonial from the woman at the bottom of the page. It sounds as if you have some really great characteristics! 
Have you considered changing your handle? I tend to bypass anyone that has "lonely" in their handle; for me, it conjures up images of desperation. Will he be clingy? Want to go from 0 - 60 in 3 seconds? Does he already consider us joined at the hips? It also makes me question if he's contacting me because he's more into quantity than quality, versus contacting me because he specifically liked my profile.
I would keep photos #1, #6, #7 and #8. I would also suggest perhaps making #7 your main photo.
You have a great smile, btw.
I'm just a caring guy with a huge heart. Delete "just" - its usually puts a negative or demeaning connotation on things. "I'm a caring guy with a huge heart" sounds much more direct and more like a quality that you believe is a good thing. Inserting "just" into that same sentence changes the meaning to a bit wishy-washy and as if you might not hold that quality in very high esteem, but just decided to throw it out there anyway.
People always tell me I'm very easy going, and a loyal friend. Speak this from first-person singular - Speak it from you; not from what other people are saying.
Heard this online internet dating stuff works. Consider deleting this entire sentence; again it sounds negative - with the unspoken rest of the sentence being, "I'm not sure if it will or not, but here I am anyway."
I’m looking for someone that I can be a friend with first. If any of this sounds interesting to you, message me :-) Consider deleting this entirely. Especially since you have a much better worded version in the "First Date" section that says, "take a chance and say hi. Let’s see where it goes." I like that wording better . . . and to express the same thought in two different places is redundant (and again, going back to your handle, it reads "desperate" to me).
If you are genuine, healthy, happy, love to laugh, and want to be with someone...take a chance and say hi. Let’s see where it goes. Consider deleting "and want to be with someone." We all want to be with someone on some level; otherwise why would we be on a dating site? Unless you're looking for quantity, do you really want *anyone* who's looking for someone to contact you, or are you more selective in who you'd like to hear from? And again, it just goes back to that "lonely (and desperate) message". Also, since you are looking for long-term, that doesn't sound like you're looking for *just anyone* - have your statements match your preferences.
On a seperate note, if you read through my profile and have a suggestion to make it better please share. I am not easily offended so you can be as nice or as brutal as you want in your constructive criticism. Consider deleting this entire sentence. I think this forum is the best place to ask for reviews; and having such a request in your actual profile seems to tie in with that lonely theme.
Man, it sure is easier to critique someone's profile, versus writing my own! 
I hope my suggestions have helped.
Be blessed,
~JLS | |
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| Please review my profile - feedback wanted!
Posted: 11/4/2009 8:42:44 AM | | I agree that your handle is a big turn off. It gives off the "Poor, poor, pitiful me. Why can't I get a date?" vibe. You want something that makes you sound like someone a woman would actually want to date. | |
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| Please review my profile - feedback wanted!
Posted: 11/4/2009 9:07:49 AM | The man from Winston-Salem who wants a ban on smoking in public.
Seriously, that has to be some kind of punchline, I just cannot figure out what the joke would have to be.
Anyhow, photos #2 and #5 really give off a "come see the nifty torture chamber I keep in my basement" kind of vibe, which your profile could do without. Women do tend to like a bit of danger in a guy, but more "Harlequin Romance pirate" kind of danger, not the disturbing-scene-out-of-Pulp-Fiction kind of danger.
JLS is completely right: any reference to loneliness or desperation is a self-fulfilling prophecy. And if you do not tell the women what kind of woman you're looking for, they'll conclude you're looking for anyone, indicating that you are desperate, and therefore undesirable.
And I cannot think of a good reason to use the word "brutal" anywhere in a profile. | |
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| Please review my profile - feedback wanted!
Posted: 11/4/2009 11:17:51 AM | When reading your screen name there OP, I burst into tears. Well, one tear – then I got over it.
And I will agree 100% with the other reviewers – some of your pictures are downright scary.
I would review your profile, but there is nothing there to review.
Cheers! | |
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| Please review my profile - feedback wanted!
Posted: 11/4/2009 11:28:39 AM | | I agree with all the above reviewers but I always have a question about the testimonials. As in this case, she is talking about just having had a date with you and what a great guy you are. The thing that comes to my mind, if she thinks you are all that, why is she recommending you to others rather than keeping you as her little secret? I would think she would want you all to herself. | |
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| Please review my profile - feedback wanted!
Posted: 11/4/2009 12:00:47 PM | | ^^^That's a good point. When I first saw a testimonial on POF, I found it a bit peculiar (not the testimonial itself; the fact that there even was one). I then found myself wondering if, at the end of a date with anyone, the guy was then going to ask me to post a testimonial for him; which I would find awkward at best. But, since I usually live in another world from most people, I just chalked it up to my not knowing how things worked. | |
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| Please review my profile - feedback wanted!
Posted: 11/5/2009 2:37:52 AM | Hey JLS!
Thank you so very much for all the in depth details and extremely super feedback about my profile!
Will incorporate your findings to my new profile. I'm doing Absolutely Fantastic Sparkling with Happiness, and how about you? :-)
Have a Grrreat Day!
Joe | |
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| Please review my profile - feedback wanted!
Posted: 11/6/2009 2:43:16 AM | Yeah it is a very nice photo. Thankyou!
Still taking one day at a time, smelling the roses, eventually that special someone will come surfing along.
Have been blessed bought a house and don't have any mortgage to worry about every month.
I'm still struggling with this online dating stuff though. Help me out with me profile. What's wrong with it?
I understand that everyone does not have 100% the same interests/hobbies, but how do you keep it together if you are not fully compatible.
I know a picture tells a thousand words, but if you have just one posted - folks ask "send some more pictures" Mail them just one more, and don't hear back from them ever again. :-)
Stay Well, and Take Care,
Joe | |
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| Please review my profile - feedback wanted!
Posted: 11/6/2009 6:49:18 AM |
I'm still struggling with this online dating stuff though. Help me out with me profile. What's wrong with it? As mentioned before, your handle may be hurting you. | |
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| Please review my profile - feedback wanted!
Posted: 11/6/2009 6:23:52 PM | Oh you mean my "Screen Name". You know to think about it everyone here is a little lonely and looking for more out of life. Created this I. D. at the POF dating site to tell the world ---- hey i'm not taken ---- no excess baggage -- no girlfriend - still available - and dateable.
Thought it was good to be single - you can keep all the money. Hey ----- I have a house, I pay my bills on time, No credit card debt, no kids.
Even added pictures On the profile. Amazing - don't include pictures - folks don't read the profile. Upload pictures - people glance at the photos - and ask "do you have any more?" Like eight random shots is not enough. Ha Ha.
Is my nose too long? LOL, I just don't get it.
I'm I ugly?
Do I scare people?
:-)
Seriously,....Please let me know what I can do to really improve my profile. I am doing my best and it seems like nothing is working. I guess , old fashion dating works the best. You know walk up to someone , break the ice,...and keep the conversation flowing....make them laugh,...look at your watch,...and tell em' . "Sorry I have to run - it was nice chatting with you"....Maybe if i was not too shy ,.......I would ask them for a number sometime hopefully soon. | |
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| Please review my profile - feedback wanted!
Posted: 11/6/2009 7:28:50 PM | Just a quick thought...
I'm not too sure about the theme you've chosen. It's nice that you want to make your profile more aesthetically appealing, but a pink background and love-hearts may not be the best way to go about doing this. It just seems a bit fruity. As far as I can tell, you're not a teenage girl, so maybe this isn't the best theme for you.
Richard | |
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| Please review my profile - feedback wanted!
Posted: 11/6/2009 8:59:52 PM | I earned 5,000 points by not spending them - just to give some lady I would probably never hear from ever again with a few online flowers or a teddy bear. So I rewarded myself with a background of my choosing. I like the quick quotes on the candies - reminds me of valentine's day. It's too bad POF does not have more options to pick and choose from for profile wallpaper.
Everyone is entitled to their opinion. I may not agree with you, but I will listen to what you have to say.
We all have different personalities, interests, and hobbies at the online POF way of life.
Each and every thought provoking comment is very much appreciated. I have a pretty thick shell, so don't mince words - just tell it like it is, and let the feedback flow. | |
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| Please review my profile - feedback wanted!
Posted: 11/6/2009 10:41:19 PM | Sorry, I never thought of it from that angle. I suppose I'm still young and narrow minded :/
If you like it and it reflects your personality, that's great. Maybe you could use it to your advantage in the About Me section too? What you just said about the candies seems to show a sentimental/romantic side. You may also want to consider re-writing that middle section so that it's more of a flowing journey of interest, rather than a list. True, this section is meant to convey who you are, but I think you give too many specific details here.
Lifestyle & Interests - As these profiles are essentially just a taster of who you are, I don't think it is necessary or productive to try and cover all the bases. Unless your life revolves around meat, or you have a passion for butchery, I would suggest removing the diet information, or at least moving it further into the body of your profile. At the minute it's in a fairly prominent position, and this is where you really need to captivate your reader. Again, unless you feel very strongly about your political views and they define who you are, they do not need to be mentioned in your profile. This can always be saved for conversations down the line. Stating that you work flexible hours and leaving it at that is unlikely to stand out to the reader. Why not expand on this detail? Something like 'Working flexible hours is great, it adds an element of freedom to my life, and allows me to seize the day' is an example of how you can add a bit more substance to your profile and reveal a bit more about yourself. The same goes for physical fitness. 'Outdoorsy type' could be anything from climbing mountains to mowing the lawn. What is it that you like to do? Being more specific about a fewer number of details gives the reader more to connect with. Lots of people travel for fun. Where do you travel to and, more importantly, what do you consider fun? Again, travelling for work is a common thing. Do you travel far? Do you enjoy that style of work? Why? As for your witty sense of humour, try to show it in your writing rather than simply stating that you have one. A lot of profiles claim to have a sense of humour but fail to make the reader smile. Don't be one of these.
Favourite Things - It's a similar story here. Cut out anything you feel is unnecessary (be ruthless). Imagine that your profile is the dialogue of a first date. Would you really talk about your favourite household appliance? Your favourite city and holiday could be great things to include in your profile, but you need to make it more personal. Let your imagination run wild. Explain what it is that you love about Upper Black Eddy, and what makes Thanksgiving so special to you. Is it spending time with your family, childhood memories, or simply all the meat!
Least Favourite Things - I'm generally not a huge fan of listing dislikes in a profile. It adds unnecessary negativity. If there's something in there that you feel is important for a woman to know when you first meet her, by all means keep it. I wouldn't say that there was anything major in there that would affect your choice in a woman, however, so if you're happy to do it, it can probably all go. You can both find out these things as your relationship progresses. You may wish to keep the bit about your worst job and people who walk slowly, but try to keep it light and use the opportunity to show off your wit.
The last two lines seem pretty good. More of that kind of thing would have been nice. The first date seems pretty good too, though you will have to ask a lady's opinion on that one. Hope that's a bit more helpful.
Best of luck. | |
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| Please review my profile - feedback wanted!
Posted: 11/6/2009 10:54:43 PM | | So I'm thinking the combination of the username and headline make you sound pitiful. And not in the puppy-dog eyes kinda way, in the actual pitiful way. That's not attractive. Did you know the username Scratch & Win is available? I noticed you play the lotteries and this sounded like a fun name. Then, you could have a matching headline : You may already be a winner! Have some fun. | |
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| Please review my profile - feedback wanted!
Posted: 11/10/2009 4:55:37 PM | Don't play the lottery - just enjoy seeing what numbers come up at random. It is exciting to see what people do with their winnings.
You have a better chance of getting struck by lightning then actually winning the lottery.
I have fun, I don't play the lottery. | |
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| Please review my profile - feedback wanted!
Posted: 11/10/2009 9:21:03 PM | ok..... so you don't play the lottery but have "lottery numbers" in your Interests field. My bad.
The point was you could have fun with your username and headline and give yourself a more inviting or clever introduction. Headline? "You could already be a winner!" ... but 'pitiful and desperate' doesn't go well with that, does it? Challenge your imagination. | |
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