| Just redone my profile and now i feel sick
Posted: 11/4/2009 1:42:16 PM | it's so difficult. I've come back to this thing and I must have sent out about 20 emails. No replies. Several emails from fat, lonely forty somethings. I can't stand these profiles that say 'no players'. I've always been a scumbag, how do I score now at 39? | |
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| Just redone my profile and now i feel sick
Posted: 11/4/2009 1:49:19 PM |
it's so difficult. I've come back to this thing and I must have sent out about 20 emails. No replies. Several emails from fat, lonely forty somethings. I can't stand these profiles that say 'no players'. I've always been a scumbag, how do I score now at 39?
Hmmm. How do you score? Well if this is what you are all about then not too well. Perhaps the fact that you view people in terms of fat, lonely forty somethings speaks volumes about you.
No negative, up their own aresholes typles pleeease. 'I don't like this and I don't like that, no players etc etc' yawn yawn. 'you know who you are'. 'Hey, it's a contradiction, **** me it's a tautology in fact!!, I don't like that!'. **** off. The same goes for 'looking for Mr. Darcy'. Well I'm Mr. Darcy dear and I wouldn't touch you with a ****ing bargepole. yawn. 'I love to keep fit on the treadmill watching banale spirit-crushing teevee'. No hamsters please.
And after reading the first lines of your profile, I am surprised that anyone gives you the time of day. I bet that it never occurs to you that you are the negative up your own arsehole type with this comment and the comment about lonely fat, forty somethings. | |
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| Just redone my profile and now i feel sick
Posted: 11/4/2009 1:51:52 PM | | it's ironic canam. thanks for the time, i'll go back to being my mellow self when I delete the first four lines. Most of the lonely fat forty somethings seem to be my exes (well one of them) and I have nothing against them, I'll be one myself soon. | |
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| Just redone my profile and now i feel sick
Posted: 11/4/2009 1:58:13 PM | Your profile is rather wonderful Canam, love the masses of interests. My profile is about as bad as it could be at the moment, frustrated, fed up and bad jokes. Someone help. (Or write it for me). Although I sincerely do not need a hamster fanatic for a g/f. | |
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| Just redone my profile and now i feel sick
Posted: 11/4/2009 1:59:58 PM | Hey, I wanted to be the first reviewer!
Here's my opinion of your profile. Go to edit profile and highlight everything and delete it. You are coming across as so jaded and negative in your first paragraph, that I think the rest of your profile isn't even worth looking at. I would recommend an attitude adjustment prior to writing a profile.
The second half of this statement below is a direct contradiction to the first paragraph of your profile. "Someone who has a serious side, and yet doesn't take things too seriously all of the time if you know what I mean. " Your profile makes it seem like you take everything too seriously.
So again delete your profile and start one that isn't offensive and maybe you'll have some luck.
Happy Fishing! | |
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| Just redone my profile and now i feel sick
Posted: 11/4/2009 2:05:04 PM |
Age39 year old Man
Do you drink?Often (>3 times/week)
Profession Currently studying
Do you have children?No
Do you have a car?No
All of these things shout "I am not 39, but maybe I am 22!" Most women your age are looking for someone who has a stable job, maybe a car, possibly kids, not still going to school. Drinking more than three times a week, whether or not you justify it properly, seems excessive. Additionally, the fact that you smoke will furthur limit your possible contacts. None of these traits are ones you can hide for very long; they just add up to a lot of nothing for your age bracket.
Love animals and would like to own another dog or two one day, but they are a lot of responsibility you know!
It's great you'd like to own more dogs, but after your negativity up front, this certainly sounds like you don't want responsibility. Like a Long Term relationship. | |
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| Just redone my profile and now i feel sick
Posted: 11/4/2009 2:05:35 PM | | Thank you Lazlo. You have confirmed my nagging doubts. The problem is that I'm so serious, and yet I love to laugh. I just got so p' ed off tonight I threw in a load of negativity rejecting negativity which is surely a mistake. I definitely need help with this thing. I'm articulate and I think I have a lot to offer - yet when it comes to writing about myself I just throw up a smokescreen. | |
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| Just redone my profile and now i feel sick
Posted: 11/4/2009 2:07:48 PM | oh afinger, I have no desire for job, car, etc.
I like being a bum. Some women don't mind. I have a reasonable income. THanks though, I wish I was 22 again :) (or do i?) | |
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| Just redone my profile and now i feel sick
Posted: 11/4/2009 2:16:16 PM | Is this a profile review or a conversation thread. If you aren't willing to hear other people's opinions then why ask for a review. The whole getting mad about anything that happens here baffles me. Especially getting angry to the point of making an obnoxious profile, what does that accomplish outside of serving to put you in a bad light. If this place makes you mad, take a break.
Either present yourself in a good light for your own good or don't come here. Who has time to get mad about Plenty of Fish, I don't and you shouldn't either. So that is an expansion on my review of your profile. | |
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| Just redone my profile and now i feel sick
Posted: 11/4/2009 2:22:06 PM | | WHAT? I'm not mad in the slightest. I have taken all constructive comments on board, redone the thing. Please Lazlo, don't get me wrong, emulating the girly negative profile was just a mild departure from sanity on my part and it only lasted for a few hours. I hope to gain from you guys an idea of how to write a successful profile! | |
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| Just redone my profile and now i feel sick
Posted: 11/4/2009 2:34:40 PM | Well you dropped the crappy parts.
That's a start. Now I read the rest of it (I did not even bother before) and here is my take on it. All in all it is not a bad profile in and of itself. It may even describe you correctly. The problem is that it is not designed to make you sound like someone that a woman would want to date. You do not sound fun. You sound intelligent and even funny but not fun. The best examples that I can give are your pictures. Not one of them make you look good. You are either making funny faces or showing your hand or something, but not one simple smiling look at your handsome face. You ain't ugly, so the impression simply becomes that you are a nice guy that women would want to be friends with. You are aiming at getting a romantic relationship here, not a platonic one.
What sort of things do you like to do socially? What sort of things are you looking for in a woman? How do you spend your time? These are the sort of things that you wanna talk about.
The fact that you do not have a car or a job is irrelevant. You are who you are and need to be honest and say them even if they are not the best most popular things to say. | |
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| Just redone my profile and now i feel sick
Posted: 11/4/2009 2:44:44 PM | | Thanks for taking the time Canam, you're one of the good guys :) The thing is that I am a lot of fun. I have this really quirky sense of humour and I've had some wonderful relationships in my life with a great deal of laughter and light involved. Now i'm single. I just find it hard to express that (the fun part). The jokes I make deadpan just don't seem to come across when turned into internet talk. I could probably do with a decent photographer as all of these are just silly. The hand one is important as it really defines me (google simian line). I have the same problem with crafting emails - I can express more with an eyebrow irl than with a 'hi, how are you' missive. | |
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| Just redone my profile and now i feel sick
Posted: 11/4/2009 2:50:57 PM | I liked your profile. It was light and welcoming, I thought. I also get that you're looking for a woman who has her own opinions and isn't shy about sharing them. I think you'll do well.
The only thing that jumped out at me is the pic from Phuket. I'm not accusing, but Thailand is one of those places sex tourists go. As a single man in his late 30's, that's going to raise warning flags for some women. | |
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| Just redone my profile and now i feel sick
Posted: 11/4/2009 2:54:33 PM | phew halftimedad, you should have read it half an hour ago - came across like the man who hates everyone. Got frustrated lol.
That was a 5 star hotel and I was there with my ex-gf, so no sex tourism, though Thailand is lovely and have visited twice now - and did meet a nice thai g/f for two months. All over now of course.  | |
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| Just redone my profile and now i feel sick
Posted: 11/4/2009 2:57:52 PM |
HTD - Was that firsthand knowledge about Phuket or a Google search?
Wow. Accusing a reviewer of being a pedophile. Seems to me that calls for a suspension.
Oh Moderator! Here please! | |
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| Just redone my profile and now i feel sick
Posted: 11/4/2009 3:19:13 PM | If someone searched through you posting history and found this thread in the Forums, it ain't a pretty picture it paints of you OP. I just thought WOW when I read what you previously had up. Anyone who saw that will lose all respect so fast your head would spin and not give a toss that frustration drove you to it. They'd wonder is this how you deal with shit that don't go your way..uh-uh..backing out. Word of mouth between friends on this site, though perhaps limited, might also damage your chances.
Has the profile update changed your attitude? Because what you showed is the absolute pits. I think afinger is right. I'm guessing you are going after 20 year olds, as you think they'll accept your excesses (smoking and drinking) and not care too much that you don't have a job. You detest 40 somethings, even though you're 40 yourself (a year's diff is nothing). And you're after beautiful huh...starts with inner beauty first. In light of this thread, "serious" to me sounds like a euphemism for angry. I wouldn't bother with you after seeing this, at least not until you've proven yourself to be decent. Could start by apologising to "the fat, lonely 40 somethings" you bitterly criticized.. | |
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| Just redone my profile and now i feel sick
Posted: 11/4/2009 3:30:04 PM | | As a matter of fact isnuttinfree (and as a a matter of fact nuttin is moron) I've had plenty of jobs, in fact I'm independently wealthy. Piss off. Word of mouth amongst your friends means nothing to me. And I'll smoke and drink until I die. If you can't cope with that 'excess' just look the other way. Prick. Who are you to judge me? You give nothing about yourself n your profile, nice to be Pontious. Prick. And I'm positively indecent, waggle my willy at the buses going past. 'Prove yourself to be decent'? Where do you get off? Go to hell. | |
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| Just redone my profile and now i feel sick
Posted: 11/4/2009 4:21:25 PM | 
Such a laugh. Go right ahead, I'm enjoying the spectacle.
So I was dead-on 'bout your Grumpy Old Fartness chasing young ass.. your immaturity is obvious. Don't keel over trying to be 21 again..lol. | |
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| Just redone my profile and now i feel sick
Posted: 11/4/2009 5:24:37 PM | I also felt the combination of smoking, drinking and no job is a major contributing factor to the lack of replies. If you could find a way to nicely explain your studies and goals, along with maybe your 3 or more times a week drinking, perhaps a beer or wine with dinner, your chances would improve. Pictures aren't frightening, there's a positive. I don't particularly like the hand shot, but to each his own.
Furthermore to date online a positive attitude, even when feeling defeated, is a must. | |
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| Just redone my profile and now i feel sick
Posted: 11/4/2009 5:58:56 PM | Yeah it is writing so it is one of those things that people read a lot into it. The humor was difficult for me to understand. Not saying it should be rigid but, might want to look at it like a job resume.
Some of it is an approach why would a woman want to date you?
I know writing these profiles are tough and hey I am lucky if I get an email a month from here. I could see the negativity in yours might deter women to some degree. I think prettysmart2 made comments I agree with. Hey if ya need drink to be positive then do it but, write something good about yourself.
-Travis | |
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| Just redone my profile and now i feel sick
Posted: 11/4/2009 7:30:48 PM | where's the lol isnuttinfree? I don't see one. go away.
Thanks prettysmart2. Perhaps I should get rid of the hand line, though I'm a moderator of the simian line group over at flickr and it's pretty important to me. Seems what you and thutch are saying is lighten the tone, perhaps ease the smoking and drinking off - I tried to be brutally honest because most night's I'll drink some wine and have a smoke you know and I don't want to surprise anyone. The only reason I am at uni is to get the bachelor's qualification - I've worked in the industry for 15 years , so I'm not a complete bum. In fact I'm studying video conversion techniques, transcoding and server performance so it's heavy stuff, but I don't want to bore them to death. ok ok, I'm going to have another try tomorrow and I'm hoping to get some better photos this week. I don't really want to wear a suit and I'm a scruffy guy but i'll try  | |
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| Just redone my profile and now i feel sick
Posted: 11/4/2009 7:39:42 PM | I have the same line on my left hand. We must be Simeonese twins.
The paragraph with the music has three separate ideas all squished together. Those need to be 3 different mini-paragraphs so the ideas will be absorbed by your viewer.
Where you talk about going back to school for the media stuff, what will this allow you to do when you're done? What kind of work/business are you looking to get into? (I know nothing about that field). You may want to reword that part as "Having been a successful contractor for many years, I can now take time for myself to go back to school for my passion - which is learning blah blah blah blah" ... or something like that. At 39, this clarifies how you are able to afford going back to school subtly - that you are doing it because you want to, not because you got down-sized and had no choice. The inquiring female mind will want to know.
Yours very truly,
Fat, not-so-lonely, 40-something | |
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| Just redone my profile and now i feel sick
Posted: 11/4/2009 8:25:02 PM | I think you need to give yourself more credit and describe your past. How did you get to going to school again? Your past careers? A little mini resume is not out of line but, more my style is very descriptive yet executive summary because of short attention spans most executives have.
Not finding women to be all that diffrent either. If ya wanna bounce ideas, post them up here never hurts to break it down into details and sections either.
-Travis | |
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