| Have you ever fallen in love with a sociopath??
Posted: 11/4/2009 9:34:58 PM | I have been reading a lot of forums on FB, players, victims and abusers, but when is a person a true sociopath ? What are the distinguishing criteria for this? Narcissistic Personality etc. and can anyone give me some insight to their experiences??
Perplexed. | |
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| Have you ever fallen in love with a sociopath??
Posted: 11/4/2009 9:41:01 PM | The basic definition of a narcissist is the willingness to benefit themselves at the expense of others. It's a win/lose not a win/win mindset. Those kind of people don't understand "do whatever you want as long as it doesn't hurt anyone." Rather they do what they want and don't care if it hurts anyone else or not. Of course, there are degrees of how bad a person can be in this area. It's not just one extreme or the other and all humans at times can be selfish. But that does not make one a narcissist, which is reserved for the chronic and consistent offenders.
Sometimes narcissists can pretend to care, if it suits their agenda, and the smart ones can get away with a lot. You have to know a person pretty well sometimes to flesh out the hidden motives. It boggles my mind how some people are so willing to leap into an entangled relationship with people they barely know.
Humans can be dangerous. Approach with care.
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| Have you ever fallen in love with a sociopath??
Posted: 11/4/2009 10:03:02 PM | Never have been involved with one and never will be.
In the 1830's this disorder was called moral insanity. 1900 it was changed to psychopathic personality. Some of the signs are manipulative with a grandiose sense of importance. Often they are pathological liars, with a lack of remorse, shame or guilt. And a need for stimulation and verbal often mean outbursts of anger if questioned. They lack empathy for other people, and proper conduct for a given situation. What they want comes first even if it means someone else gets hurt.
Think of Bernie Madoff, or various people who have abused others sexually, or emotionally.Or the man or woman who drain you of emotional, physical, energy. Often think some of the people who are on some of these reality shows are narcissistic because they just cannot say no to unhealthy attention. Or do anything to make money, that doesnt have a narcissistic base.
~Beth~ | |
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| Have you ever fallen in love with a sociopath??
Posted: 11/4/2009 10:03:57 PM | A true sociopath is fairly easy to detect because you can sense the evil. These are the people that torture animals.
I'm kind of doubting they would openly be torturing animals for anyone to see.
Actually, from what I've read, some people in positions of power, like a CEO or politician tend to be somewhat sociopathic. Part of it is their "ability" to put themselves above all else, without consideration for anyone, or anything, as well as persistent lying or deceit, using charm or wit to manipulate others, and a few other traits of antisocial personality disorder. | |
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| Have you ever fallen in love with a sociopath??
Posted: 11/4/2009 10:38:15 PM | John Edwards is a pretty good example of someone with a narcissistic personality.
Ted Bundy is a damn good example of a sociopath.
The reality of the difference between the two is blurred, even professionals have a problem with the difference.
http://www.wisegeek.com/what-is-the-difference-between-a-psychopath-and-a-sociopath.htm | |
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| Have you ever fallen in love with a sociopath??
Posted: 11/4/2009 10:45:40 PM | A true sociopath is fairly easy to detect because you can sense the evil. These are the people that torture animals.
I'm kind of doubting they would openly be torturing animals for anyone to see.
Actually, from what I've read, some people in positions of power, like a CEO or politician tend to be somewhat sociopathic. Part of it is their "ability" to put themselves above all else, without consideration for anyone, or anything, as well as persistent lying or deceit, using charm or wit to manipulate others, and a few other traits of antisocial personality disorder.
I'm kind of doubting they would openly be torturing animals for anyone to see. It is classic sociopath behavior to torture animals. Usually those types of individuals don't care if anyone sees them or not WTH? The only instance I can see it bothering them is if it effects some high they get off the torturing. If that is the case they will probably alter their plan. Like someone stated before these types of people are usually highly intelligent, but they have no empathy(or soul) for anything except themselves. This type of behavior can be sociopathic and or psychopathic. If you look at many serial killers profiles many of them tortured animals when they were children. | |
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| Have you ever fallen in love with a sociopath??
Posted: 11/4/2009 10:52:57 PM | One big clue
You'll have people who HATE him ..but.... don't quite know why- just something about him.
And other people who LOVE him blindly and think he's wonderful.
There are almost never anything in between.
They aren't always "evil"-- they often wear the charming, friendly mask, but are 100% deceitful.
Studies show that 1 in 25 people are sociopaths. Very few are "serial killers"-- most are your neighbors, co-workers, teachers, doctors, business owners, in-laws...
Don't be fooled into thinking you can easily "spot" one or that they're all Ted Bundys
Try http://www.lovefraud.com/
"Sociopaths often blend easily into society. They're entertaining and fun at parties. They appear to be intelligent, charming, well-adjusted and likable. The key word is "appear." | |
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| Have you ever fallen in love with a sociopath??
Posted: 11/4/2009 10:55:02 PM | Like someone stated before these types of people are usually highly intelligent
Wrong!!
If its one thing I know... its my sociopaths, psychopaths... serial killers 
Mostly average to below average intelligence.
They dont get away with things because they're exceptionally intelligent... its their ability to assimiliate.
Like a predator hiding in the grass
The torturing of animals as a young child is an almost definate... preoccupation with death... as are other traits such as bed wetting as an older child
Another myth is that these people are violent. Mostly they are not.
Was only last night perusing the latest psychological information based on MRI scans with isotoping etc... on serial killers who people often associate with being sociopaths
For people like that to turn to violence... there are 3 distinguishing factors.
1. mental illness... pre-existing
2. head trauma of some sort...prefrontal lobe damage
3. childhood abuse... sexual or psychological... usually both
However... people like Bundy, BTK and there was another... cant remember who sorry who do not fit the criteria.
Those people are psychopaths... not sociopaths.
ie. there is no reason for them to do the things they do other than their brains are wired completely differently to normal people
Incidentally...psychopaths... do not "sweat" as normal people. They feel no anticipatory fear. | |
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| Have you ever fallen in love with a sociopath??
Posted: 11/4/2009 11:10:00 PM | Wrong!!
If its one thing I know... its my sociopaths, psychopaths... serial killers
Mostly average to below average intelligence.
The torturing of animals as a young child is a definate... as are other traits such as bed wetting.
Another myth is that these people are violent. Mostly they are not.
Was only last night perusing the latest psychological information based on MRI scans with isotoping etc... on serial killers who people often associate with being sociopaths
For people like that to turn to violence... there are 3 distinguishing factors.
1. mental illness
2. head trauma of some sort
3. childhood abuse
However... people like Bundy, BTK and there was another... cant remember who sorry who do not fit the criteria.
Those people are psychopaths... not sociopaths.
ie. there is no reason for them to do the things they do other than their brains are wired completely . I didn't say all were, I was thinking of the Bundy, BTK types when writing but didn't clarify. Definitely agree on the 3 distingusihing factors especially head injuries/trauma relation
Incidentally...psychopaths... do not "sweat" as normal people. They feel no anticipatory fear. Oh that's nice my last ex bf didn't sweat like a normal person, but he could get stinky pits does that count? lol | |
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| Have you ever fallen in love with a sociopath??
Posted: 11/4/2009 11:24:26 PM |
Incidentally...psychopaths... do not "sweat" as normal people. They feel no anticipatory fear.
Oh that's nice my last ex bf didn't sweat like a normal person, but he could get stinky pits does that count? lol
*eek*  the stinky pits would almost be enough of a reason to bail.
Actually Im pretty knowledgable on this subject... which leads me to saying...
...if I get involved with ANYONE who displays ANY manipulative behavior... lack of empathy including rationalization of cruel behavior... or sadistic pleasure or motivation... hurting animals deliberately... or inappropriately rough play with children...
Then I do this...
He can be that corporate CEO... but I aint hanging around to see those qualities on a personal level.
Nuh uh... | |
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| Have you ever fallen in love with a sociopath??
Posted: 11/5/2009 12:10:38 AM | No, but I've had one for a roommate. It's not any one thing, but rather a continuum.
Check out the interwebs for detailed info.
All I can say is, if you find out you're involved in any way with someone who is a sociopath - run as far and fast as you can - post haste.
A true sociopath is fairly easy to detect because you can sense the evil. These are the people that torture animals.
Au contraire...it's thinking like that which allows sociopaths to run roughshod over people.
Most sociopaths don't kill animals, they severely wound human spirits. | |
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| Have you ever fallen in love with a sociopath??
Posted: 11/5/2009 1:00:27 AM | | You have to be a suicidal retard to even consider associating loosely with-let alone falling in love with-a sociopath. Read a board/book on the subject to get all the symptoms. The main ones are that a sociopath has no conscience, and will do anything to anyone anytime anywhere to get his/her way. They are also all very impulsive. To have a desire is to act on it. Sociopaths who get near me get away, or get hurt. | |
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| Have you ever fallen in love with a sociopath??
Posted: 11/5/2009 1:08:37 AM | Lying. It can take a long time, a year sometimes, or more, before a woman realizes she is with a sociopath. This is because they can be very deceptive, charming and lovable.
You will love the mask they present. You can think they are the sweetest person you ever met. Then slowly things don't add up. They do outlandish things that are at odds with the front they present. They might be avid church goers who go to porn sites
every night and do cam sex with strippers constantly as an example of the
false front they show the world and their true nature.
They will mix in a bit of truth with a ton of lies all the time. The way they actually
are will be very different from the false mask they seem to be.
They are awful monsters who hide behind a facade of kindness and goodness.
Lying and deceitfulness
reckless outlandish behavior
irresponsible with money
charming and lovable sometimes
don't care if they see someone suffering (but might pretend they do)
pretending to be someone kind and nice | |
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| Have you ever fallen in love with a sociopath??
Posted: 11/5/2009 4:36:18 AM |
can anyone give me some insight to their experiences??
They're tricky. They say things in a way that confuses you into thinking they're right. Like, "The sky is green and chickens don't typically fly." "Wait a second... the sky isn't green." "But chickens don't typically fly, right?" "Yeah, but..." "But nothing. I'm right." Now their falsities aren't as obvious as the sky being green, but that's the kind of things they'll do. They'll disguise their agendas. You know you're confused, but you don't know why because the logic twisting is so subtle. If you've fallen for their charm, you lose your objectivity and don't recognize it as easily as you would if it was someone you had no connection with. There is absolutely no communicating with them because they understand only one perspective... the one they've got formulated in their mind at that given moment, which will also never remain consistent because it will adapt to suit a new agenda at a later date.
My ex was/is a sociopath. It's not really all that fun. | |
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| Have you ever fallen in love with a sociopath??
Posted: 11/5/2009 6:37:45 AM |
Some of the signs are manipulative with a grandiose sense of importance. Often they are pathological liars, with a lack of remorse, shame or guilt. And a need for stimulation and verbal often mean outbursts of anger if questioned. They lack empathy for other people, and proper conduct for a given situation. What they want comes first even if it means someone else gets hurt.
Yep, and than GOD that we divorced! | |
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| Have you ever fallen in love with a sociopath??
Posted: 11/5/2009 7:29:04 AM |
A true sociopath is fairly easy to detect because you can sense the evil. These are the people that torture animals. I knew a girl who used to put a T-shirt and sunglasses on her German Shepherd just for amusement. I can't believe I allowed myself to fall asleep next to her. | |
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| Have you ever fallen in love with a sociopath??
Posted: 11/5/2009 7:30:47 AM | I didn't...but my daughter did. The guy was with the HA at one point and even they didn't want him in the end but did use his sociopathic qualities to get "jobs" done. I certainly don't need an advanced degree in psychology to know the guy was a sociopath, although I wished at the time I could have forced my daughter to go see one.
These asshats are incredibly good at their manipulations of their "victims" who are susceptible. Yes, I did hear stories of him being cruel to cats when he was young, etc. The amount of time I tried to get my daughter to see this guy was a mental case was incredible. Towards the end of their "relationship" that wasn't, and after she broke up with him and stupidly got back together with him, I sent her a link that outlined the numerous qualities of a sociopath. I had always told her he was one but I think she thought I was just blowing smoke because I was her mother. When she read the qualities, he didn't fall into just a few of the categories, he fell into every single one of them. She told me she sat there crying as she read. Somehow she finally decided to get a backbone and called it quits...via Email...out of necessity, not knowing what his reaction would be in person and not trusting herself to yet again be pulled in by the tactics these mental rejects use. She's an entirely different woman now that she's been out of his clutches for two years. Thank gawd he never laid a hand on her - he has on other women since. If he had, I'm afraid he would have become my own cat while I temporarily lost my own mind and tortured him. | |
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| Have you ever fallen in love with a sociopath??
Posted: 11/5/2009 7:30:55 AM |
A true sociopath is fairly easy to detect because you can sense the evil. These are the people that torture animals.
Oh my!!!
Never experienced this - thank God. | |
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| Have you ever fallen in love with a sociopath??
Posted: 11/5/2009 7:48:42 AM | I never have fell in love with one. I dated one for a few weeks.
My intuition told me to run the first night we met, but he was cute....
The more we dated.......The more he seemed aggressive and crazy.
He would come in my apartment and look around, like he was expecting someone to jump out of the bathroom.
I wouldn't trust him in a room with a cute doggie. He just seems like the type that would stone animals or worse.
The last string was when he used my telephone to call someone and threaten them with breaking their legs. Did, I mention when I stopped seeing him.. He broke the door down in my apartment and stole all my things??? I mean the door was literally laying in the hall.
He was and IS a sociopath. | |
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| Have you ever fallen in love with a sociopath?
Posted: 11/5/2009 8:19:51 AM | No, but I was once quite in love with the façade presented by someone I now believe to be a narcissistic sociopath. It was not, of course, the real person at all, and over time this revealed itself, so I cannot say that I was in love with him, per se. But it would have been nearly impossible to spot right away. He was a psychiatrist and had spent, literally, his entire life learning how best to manipulate people into thinking and feeling what he wanted them to think and feel.
As I gradually began to see it - the initial tip-offs were an evident lack of remorse and empathy - I slowly understood that my responses to him had been planned far, far ahead by him, and since I do have normal emotions and cannot think that way, he had always been and would always be several steps ahead of me in the ability to anticipate and mold my reactions.
If we had met twenty years earlier, he would have fooled me completely and indefinitely. He did fool, completely and (AFAIK) indefinitely, a large number of others, none of whom were idiots, they simply assumed the honorable intent on his part that he gave the impression he had - decent people are by far the easiest to manipulate. Occasionally, one, like me, would begin to spot the false notes and back away from him. These people were invariably labeled as "crazy" by him.
Now I know the warning signs, but that is likely to be useless, as these personalities are rare to begin with, and even more rarely so intelligent and successful as this one. I believe that by far the majority of them are in prison (which he had a few times only narrowly escaped). It is extraordinarily unlikely that I will ever encounter another one in more than the most glancing way, in which case I will have no idea, nor will it make any difference to my life.
It does out itself eventually in at least some ways. His marriages failed, he invested badly and lost all the considerable money he'd made, he lost his medical licenses for sleeping with his psychiatric patients, his adult children are troubled and one committed suicide, and ultimately he has now gone from being a quite prominent expert in local psychiatric circles to a professional pariah, dependent upon a tiny handful of extraordinarily vulnerable therapy clients who are unaware that he is unlicensed, and his daughter and her husband, who allow him to live in their basement apartment for very little rent. So I think they do get theirs eventually. But it can take a very, very long time. | |
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