| Can someone help out a bit?
Posted: 11/5/2009 3:36:57 PM | I'm not getting any responses from the girls near me so thinking it must be more than just bad luck. I know the guys:girls ratio is skewed a lot but I'm thinking there must be some problem with my profile.
Since law school I've gotten into the habit of writing things very condensed and to the point which I'm pretty sure doesn't go over well. I also like to put in a lot of description of myself which might be a bad idea. I've been told I look older in photos by a few people over the years as well.
Anyways, just looking for some advice. I like the idea of online dating because I can weed out girls with habits I don't want (e.g. smokers) before even talking with them, but maybe it's just not for me.
I have been pretty successful on here chatting with some girls from China (I went to China and checked out some profiles there just for fun and didn't realize if you favorited someone it let them know).
Hopefully this doesn't qualify as a redundant or pity thread. | |
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| Can someone help out a bit?
Posted: 11/5/2009 3:57:35 PM | What do you REALLY like, or dislike? Put in a list of likes and (half jokey) dislikes. Easier, and more fun, to read.
Good luck. | |
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| Can someone help out a bit?
Posted: 11/5/2009 4:10:26 PM | Thanks Guernsey Donkey. I'm very friendly and at least a little bit witty in person, but for some reason I can't seem to make anything work for me in writing. I seem to especially struggle with jokes in writing.
Your 'first date' section is great, btw. | |
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| Can someone help out a bit?
Posted: 11/5/2009 4:16:07 PM | I would scratch the whole thing and start again …that includes your intro line as well. The just fishing for now is the same as going shopping for a suit and when the sales attendent asks if they can help you with anything you say …. No thanks just “looking” You are here at POF for a reason …. Just like when you were looking for a suit and found yourself at the “store”.
This paragraph is really bad, as it has contradictions in every sentence ….. see the brackets:
I tend to be very independent and do things my own way. I like just about every type of music, movie, etc., (as long as it's done well). I tend to be a bit of an intellectual, (but not in a snobby way), and I'm fine with roughing it (to an extent.) I like going on long boating or camping trips (but that's not really feasible for me right now due to work.)
See what I mean …. Read it again WITHOUT the bracket parts …sounds better? Your Pic’s are ok and your interests list is detailed and varied.
In your first date you start off with … If meeting someone off the internet ???? The interenet IS the outlet and then you start again with that negativity again (to see if they were anything like they portrayed themselves to be.)
I hope my feedback helps …. Good Luck
Peace ….the FairyHealer | |
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| Can someone help out a bit?
Posted: 11/5/2009 4:47:17 PM | Thanks for the tips. I started most of it over. I think you're right that it was too negative.
I guess it always seems like girls hate guys who come on too strong, so was trying to be as light as possible in the intro line. | |
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| Can someone help out a bit?
Posted: 11/5/2009 6:32:37 PM | Hi ....
I just had another look and your profile is MUCH better!!! Here's more advice if you want it ....
You Wrote:
My ultimate goal would be to retire early and go cruising, but that's a long way off. Boats and the water are a big part of my life. I have the use of a small sailboat out on hood's canal (but am looking to buy one for myself.) I want to get back into SCUBA diving too. (It's an expensive hobby though and I stopped doing it while I was a poor student for many years.) Love crabbing, clamming, and most things people do out on the water.
May I suggest:
Being on and in the water is a big part of my life. Currently I have the use of a small sailboat and enjoy sailing out on hoods canal. I look forward to the day when I will have my own. Although it’s been a few years I also enjoy Scuba diving, maybe this is something you and I could do together? I’ve been Crabbing and clamming too and really love being around water.
The intro line you had about retiring early .... at 27 years old, you are right it is ALONG way off ..... delete it. Too much info about being a poor student and stopping a hobby ....delete.
Other than that .... great profile and happy "fishing"
Peace .....the FairyHealer | |
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| Can someone help out a bit?
Posted: 11/5/2009 7:22:16 PM | Thanks a lot FairyHealer!
I think if I made my practice all online/over the phone and did it while swinging at the anchor I could semi-retire pretty young. When I think about how much I spend on office space leases and other costs associated with a brick and mortar business, as well as the high cost of housing and utilities on land....even if I was earning $3k less per month I'd still be coming out ahead, and would save big on taxes. Anyways, maybe a pipe dream but not impossible I don't think. Gotta have dreams. All that's a discussion for a different board though, heh. | |
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| Can someone help out a bit?
Posted: 11/5/2009 7:23:41 PM | Hello,
I think you need a close-up pic of your face - or closer than what you have right now, anyway.
Other than that, I recommend indicating some deisre to explore her interests or find shared interests. Imagine there is someone who is reading your profile, thinking you sound interesting, isn't a boating type or an Asian film fan, and is wondering about whether you might have any interest in what she enjoys, or if the two of you could find other shared interests. A woman who is a match for you has interests that are a strong as your interests, right? Make sure you seem open to them (assuming that's true).
Good luck! | |
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| Can someone help out a bit?
Posted: 11/5/2009 8:00:37 PM | Thanks Resident~Expert. That's certainly a good idea.
Hm, it's looking a little long now.... | |
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| Can someone help out a bit?
Posted: 11/5/2009 8:14:02 PM | You are very welcome. (I can relate to the 3-yr grinder hampering our ability to write expressively.)
I'd say the woman for you isn't going to be put off by having to read a few more sentences. | |
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