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| Ladies/gents, what do you think?
Posted: 11/5/2009 4:04:05 PM | Hey, so I recently created an account on here, first I will say I live in a small populated place so I'm not overly surprised at the lack of messages, but I thought I would see if my profile seems appealing to any of you. I am honest with everything I say and try to show my personality through what I wrote. Anyway, let me know what you think
Cheers! | |
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| Ladies/gents, what do you think?
Posted: 11/5/2009 4:15:01 PM | Most of your sentences begin with the word "I." Not only is it monotonous, but it sounds fairly conceited. Also, you have short, choppy sentences with even shorter paragraphs.
Make it flow, make it an easy read for her so she will want to read more. If you can impress her with how you say things, you will get much further.
My computer blows, so I'm not sure on your pics, but I did notice two that advertised your drinking habits. It may just be me, but I never contacted anyone who included his booze in his picture with him (your hat was along the same vein).
Your main pic isn't of you smiling. Is there a reason? Do you not like your smile? IMO, most women are more apt to respond to a happy, friendly guy.
Happy fishing! | |
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| Ladies/gents, what do you think?
Posted: 11/5/2009 4:18:51 PM | I am still trying to figure out what women want in a profile, but just thought I'd throw out a few editing errors in your profile...
No "and" in the list in your first sentence; no space after the first period; several paragraphs do not have any punctuation at their ends; in the second paragraph, "so if your into" should be you're instead of your; and maybe some others that aren't popping out at me...
Don't mean to be a grammar nazi. | |
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